by Emma Tharp
Would it be too forward of me to ask him to go with me to the concert? I’m not taking Marcus now. Cole and I could go as friends. Clasping my hands in front of me, I ask, “I have tickets to see them this weekend. You want to come with me?”
His mouth falls open. “Really?”
I nod and my knee bounces. “Only if you want to.”
A grin forms at the corners of his mouth. “Sure. That would be amazing. I’ve never seen them live.”
Even though Cole is reserved, excited energy is coming off him in waves. He unfolds his arms and looks more comfortable. It makes me feel lighter and happy.
Unfortunately, I think I left the tickets at Marcus’s house. I knew I should’ve selected etickets at checkout. Not a big deal. I’ll grab them soon.
“How has work been?” Cole holds eye contact.
“It’s been great. The practice has been busy. What about you? How’s the season going so far for you?” I ask, unable to look away from Cole’s mouth and angular jaw. He’s very nice to look at.
Leaning in closer, he says, “So far so good. I like where we’re going this season. It looks like we might make it to the playoffs.”
“That’s great news.” The song changes. It’s one off a soundtrack to a new movie I like. “Oh, hey, did you see this movie?”
This yields me an embarrassed smile and a shoulder shrug. “Yeah. It’s a chick flick, but I liked it.”
“I wouldn’t call it a chick flick. It was more of a drama,” I add to make him feel more at ease.
Cole’s arm is across the edge of the couch and I’m sitting back. Even though he’s not touching me, I like the way it feels having his arm behind me, almost like he’s protecting me.
“I’m not a big fan of parties,” he tells me.
This doesn’t come as a surprise to me. When I first noticed him at the party, he looked as if he were a fish out of water, with his eyes darting around and his shoulders tense and tight. “Why not?”
“It might be my almost paralyzing social awkwardness.” A smile settles over his lips. “But I’m sure you have no idea what that feels like. You seem relaxed in social settings.”
I shrug and swirl the small amount of wine left in my glass. “I wouldn’t call myself an extrovert, but I don’t mind being around people. At the same time, I know what you mean.”
One of his fingertips ghosts along my shoulder, but as quickly as I feel its warm soothing presence, it’s gone. “I sense that. You never seemed as enthusiastic as Marcus did out in public. That guy loves attention, doesn’t he?” He rolls his eyes and a low laugh escapes his lips.
Lowering my stare down to my lap, I say, “Yeah. That should’ve been a sign.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I don’t know why I had to bring him up. That was a mistake.” His voice is low and husky and his eyes are full of regret. “See what I mean? I’m not very good in social settings, always seem to put my foot in my mouth.”
Angling myself toward him, I murmur, “It’s okay. Your comment didn’t upset me. It seems we see things similarly.”
He raises his eyes cautiously to mine. “You sure? I know you’re upset and the last thing I want to do is add to that.”
“No. You’re helping me. I like talking to you. And I don’t think you’re giving yourself enough credit when it comes to your social skills.” I give his shoulder a playful nudge.
This grants me an achingly beautiful smile that starts at his gray eyes, giving them a teal blue tone, and goes all the way down to his gorgeous mouth. It’s the kind of smile I can tell he doesn’t give out much. All the noise and background distractions of the party fall away and it’s just Cole and me. “Thank you for saying that. I’m glad that I’m helping you.”
“You are. So much.” It’s a little scary just how comfortable I am with him already. Being around him opens me up and makes me want to share things with him.
Cole glances down at his watch. “I’m looking forward to going to see Lawless with you, but I’m going to head home now.”
I’m not surprised. Not being a fan of parties, I’m glad he stayed as long as he did. “I’ll call you to firm up plans for the concert.”
He stands and I do at the same. “Great,” he says.
I don’t know what possesses me, but I go up on my tiptoes and kiss his cheek.
There’s that sexy, panty-melting smile again. “I had a good time tonight, Alex. Good night.”
“Night.” I wave as he walks away toward Derek.
Smiling, I touch my lips and can swear I still feel tingles from Cole’s scruff. This feeling could be addictive.
Cora makes her way toward me with a devilish glint to her eyes. “Okay, can I just say how cute you and Cole are together?”
“We’re just friends,” I tell her because I’ll never admit how I get butterflies when he’s around. Especially so soon after the breakup with Marcus.
She waves a dismissive hand at me. “Whatever you say, but I love Cole. He’s the nicest guy. In fact, I’m surprised he made it over here tonight. Normally he keeps to himself.”
“He told me he isn’t into parties. But he was good company for me. I’m glad he came,” I admit.
“You two looked cozy over here.” Her perfectly penciled brows rise.
I nod, unable to deny how content I feel with him. “He’s the opposite of Marcus, and I prefer Cole’s quiet ways to Marcus’s constant need for attention. But I don’t want to get ahead of myself. I’ve only just ended things with Marcus. And who knows if Cole would want a woman like me?”
“Why, because you’re smart, successful, and gorgeous?” She laughs. “And he’s single. At least I’ve never heard him talk about having a girlfriend and I haven’t seen him with one either.”
“Thanks for the intel, but like I said, we’re just friends.” For now.
She puts her arms up in mock surrender. “Okay, okay. I get it. Let’s set up a lunch date, soon.”
“Yes. I’d love that.” I give her a hug and my heart warms. Two new friendships are blossoming, and I couldn’t be happier about it.
I show up and am relieved to see Marcus’s car isn’t in the driveway. Thank goodness, he isn’t actually here, although from the way he sounded when I told him I was coming by, I sort of expected him to be here. It’s better this way. Walking inside, the smell of gardenias, my favorite flowers, hit my nose. The lights in the kitchen are dimmed and candles are lit around the room. A bottle of wine is open on the counter and two glasses are sitting next to it. What is he doing?
Marcus rounds the corner with a smile on his face. “Hi,” he says.
“I thought you weren’t going to be here.” I say, my tone flat and impatient.
Seemingly unfazed, he goes to the counter and picks up a wine glass and brings it to me. “I wasn’t, but I changed my mind. Let’s talk.”
Looking around at all my favorite things and the grand romantic gesture, I wonder what exactly he thinks will happen tonight. “I don’t want a drink. I just need a few of my things and I’ll get out of your hair.”
He cocks a brow at me, as if he’s surprised that I’m not on board with his plans. “Please. Have a seat.”
It doesn’t look like he’s going to take no for an answer. Maybe it’s best to get this conversation out of the way. Reluctantly, I sit on one of the barstools at the island. “Okay. What do you want to talk about?”
Marcus takes the seat next to me. He turns to face me, a frown tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I’m still in love with you, Alex. I miss you. Do you think there’s any way for you to forgive me?”
Crossing my arms in front of my chest, I say, “I can’t be with you now. The trust between us is gone; you broke it.”
He squeezes the bridge of his nose and pinches his eyes shut. “You can’t honestly tell me that you don’t love me anymore.”
“Maybe not, but that doesn’t mean that we should get back together.”
He leans against the counter and into my personal space. “
But you still love me.”
I shift in my seat, putting some distance between us. “You missed the point. We aren’t getting back together,” I say, injecting force into my words fueled from hurt and impatience.
He opens his mouth and closes it, a blank stare on his face. He’s deflated. I can’t believe he thought I’d come here and he could win me back. His ego is that big.
Standing, I leave the kitchen and make my way upstairs to the bedroom before I’m roped into spending anymore of my evening here.
Marcus follows me.
Tugging a bag down from the shelf, I fill it with work clothes, yoga pants, and gym clothes. Zipping up the bag, I go to the dresser where the tickets are.
He sits on the edge of the bed with his elbows on his knees, staring at me. I have very little sympathy despite the forlorn look on his face. “What about counseling?” he mumbles, like he doesn’t mean to say it.
I thumb through the pile of papers on the dresser and say, “I can’t do this. It’s time for us to move on.” Without looking at him, I continue to riffle through the mess. “Where are the Lawless tickets?” I ask.
“I gave them away. Figured since you left you wouldn’t want to go anymore,” he says with his voice full of nonchalance.
Shaking my head, I blow out a long calming breath. “It would’ve been nice if you could’ve asked me before you got rid of them.”
He shrugs with a dispassionate expression on his face that I’d like to slap off right about now.
This is a lesson for me. I need to get all of my things out of here and as soon as possible. The next time they’re on the road for games, I’ll come over and get everything.
I give him a death stare before I say, “I’m out of here.”
Lying back on the bed he says, “Don’t let the door hit ya on the way out.”
What a dick. Storming out, I slam the door behind me.
Getting in the car, I throw my bag in the back seat and pull my phone out of my pocket. Tears sting the back of my eyes while I send a text to Cole.
Sorry, I don’t have the tickets anymore. I’m going to have to cancel next weekend.
I show up at Lettuce Make You Lunch to find Cora already there with two salads and drinks at a corner table. Since it’s a workday, I only have an hour and a half for lunch. “Thank you for meeting me here and getting us food.”
Cora stands and gives me a hug. “No problem at all. You have me curious. It sounded like you needed to vent on our phone call.”
“I do, but before we go there, how is Derek?” I hate to show up somewhere and it be all about me and my problems.
Her face has a radiance to it when she says, “He’s excellent. We’re great. But my curiosity is piqued. Tell me what’s up.”
Taking the seat across from her, I sit and cross my legs. “It’s Marcus. Again. He has a way of ruining everything.”
She takes a bite of her salad and sets her fork down in front of her. “Oh, no. What did he do this time?”
“He gave away my Lawless tickets for this weekend. I went over to his house to get the tickets yesterday when he said he wasn’t going to be around.”
Rolling her eyes, she says, “Let me guess. He was there, wasn’t he?”
“He was. And he had wine with two glasses sitting on the table with candles lit. As if I was going to hang around and have a glass with him. I’m not quite sure why he’s not getting the message. I don’t answer his phone calls or his texts. I moved out and refuse to see him anymore.”
She scrunches her face in a frown. “The bastard is delusional.”
“Right? And he doesn’t give a shit about anyone but himself. He got rid of my tickets without even asking me. He knew how excited I was to go.” I hesitate, looking down at my salad. “I asked Cole if he wanted to go with me and he said yes. I was excited to spend time with him.”
A smile quirks her lips. “Ah ha. You guys are just friends.” Her fingers make air quotes. “I can tell by the way your entire face just lit up when you were talking about him. You can keep denying it to yourself, but there’s something there. I see it.”
Oh, hell. Who am I kidding? I pick at my salad and pop a piece of chicken in my mouth to give myself a second to think. “Okay, you’re right. I do feel something for him. There I said it.”
“Yes.” She whacks the table with the palm of her hand. “Now we’re getting somewhere.”
I chuckle. “Really, now.”
“We are. And it makes me so happy. You and Cole are great people and I’d be ecstatic to see the two of you together.” Her voice is full of enthusiasm. It’s contagious.
“Thanks for saying that, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. It’s all really new. I do like Cole and when we’re together he makes me feel happy and protected. I’m open if the opportunity arises.” I clench my jaw. “If only we could’ve gone to the concert together.”
Cora grabs my hand. “Who cares if you can’t go to the concert. Ask him to go somewhere else with you. To dinner, the park, anywhere. I know he’ll say yes. He likes you. I can see it.”
Her words sink in and seep into my heart. I believe her. Heat swells in my chest. “You really think so?”
“I know so.”
“Thank you for this, Cora.”
“For what?” she asks.
“All of this. Lunch and listening to me vent and the support.” Cora is turning out to be someone I feel like I can trust.
Her face brightens into a beautiful smile. “That’s what friends are for.”
Six
Cole
I lie back on my couch with a beer after our game tonight. We won and I should be celebrating, but instead, I’m disappointed.
Shit.
I was looking forward to going to the concert this weekend with Alex.
Could she have cancelled because she’s having second thoughts?
The housewarming party a couple nights ago just shows how bad I am with people. I was having a great conversation with Alex and I bring up Marcus. What a dick move. She doesn’t need to think about that asshole anymore than she has to. But for some reason, she acted like it didn’t bother her and she told me that it helps her to talk to me. That might be a first. My insides heat up. Nobody has ever told me that. And it’s all I keep thinking about. When I’m with her she makes me feel like I could be a better man, and maybe, just maybe, I could be enough for her. What a fucking revelation.
Growing up, my prick of a father was verbally abusive to all of us. Hearing that shit over and over, you start believing it. That you’re a no good piece of shit that will never amount to anything. That I suck so bad at hockey, I’ll never be good enough to play past high school. And the things he used to say to my sister and sweet mother. It churns my stomach to even think about it. Well, none of that was right, and I knew it, but it also wasn’t good training on how a man should treat a woman.
And it was blaringly obvious when my ex, Veronica, and I dated last year. We were attracted to each other from the night we met at a local bar. I brought her home and we had sex all night long. She was different than a puck bunny hook-up because she didn’t know that I played in the NHL.
The morning after our sexcapades, she stuck around and made me breakfast. And I didn’t want her to leave afterward. So, she stayed and we had sex again. When she asked what I did for work, I told her I was a coach for a local hockey team. She bought the lie and we made plans to see each other again.
Ronnie never pressured me to have conversations like most women did. And after she kept coming around for a couple of weeks, never wanting more than to see me and spend time together, I told her the truth about being in the NHL. It didn’t faze her.
Everything went well for a while. And then it all changed. Valentine’s Day came and went and I never acknowledged it. In my defense we had an away game and it never even crossed my mind. She got mad and I didn’t take it well. I told her if she needed me to buy her things to make her happy, she could break things off. That’s
when she handed me a card. She’d written a message on the inside about how happy she was. That’s all she wanted in return, and I didn’t give it to her. It was the first of many things that ruined us. It turns out a woman also likes to get calls and texts when you’re out of town for a few days. They enjoy a certain amount of attention.
She left me after a few months. I didn’t blame her. My mother has since been coaching me on the ways to a woman’s heart, but I’m not sure if it’d be enough for a woman like Alex. Could it be?
I don’t know, but I have to at least try.
That’s why I put my computer on my lap and search ticket websites trying to find us seats for the Lawless concert this weekend. They aren’t cheap, especially seats close to the stage, but I don’t care. Getting to spend time with Alex will be worth it. I buy the best seats I can find and text Alex.
Found tickets to the Lawless concert. Hope you can still go.
She texts back immediately with a smiley face emoji.
I pick Alex up before the concert. She’s dressed in a short pair of hard-on-inducing denim shorts and a green V-neck shirt that makes her emerald eyes pop. “Thanks for driving,” she says, a huge smile on her face.
“No problem. You look nice.” Nice. God, that sounded cheesy.
She doesn’t seem to mind. She looks down at herself and pushes her long hair over her right shoulder giving me the perfect view of her smooth cheeks and full lips. Smiling, she says, “Thanks. You look handsome, too.”
Do dudes blush? My face feels warm. I’m probably blushing. “Thanks,” I mutter and pull out into traffic.
“I have a question,” she says. “Are you dating anyone?”
Well, that’s one way to break the ice. “Nope.”
“Okay, I wasn’t sure. I hope I’m not prying,” she says with some hesitation.
I signal and keep my eyes on the road as I merge onto the highway. “No, it’s not a problem.” And I mean it. I like talking to her.
“Tell me if you want me to stop, but I’m going to ask you a few things. To get to know you better, and you feel free to do the same. What’s been your longest relationship?”
