So when his fingers delved under her skirt, she allowed the touch. His cold fingers shocked her molten core, and the touch seemed to startle him as much as it did her.
“Addie…” He seemed suddenly awake and startled. “Addie, I'm sorry, I…” His hand pulled back
“Don't stop!” she begged, urging his fingers back into her secret depths. “Touch me.”
“Addie, I can't. I'm sorry, you know I won't take your virginity.”
“Then don't,” she urged. “Only please don't stop. I'm burning, Jesse.”
Burning, sweet girl? You don't know the half of it. The things I can do to make this sweet flesh hot. A wicked voice seemed to whisper in his ear, If you don't finish the act, you can touch her all she wants. Her husband will never know. You'll be her delicious secret for the rest of her life. Her lover who didn't dishonor her.
He pressed one finger into her and examined her hymen. The membrane seemed sturdy enough not to rupture easily. Too bad for her, but good for me. He slipped past its opening and deep into her body.
“Ahhhhh,” Addie sighed. “That's good, Jesse.” Her voice sounded thick, like sun warmed honey. He didn't dare thrust his finger inside her, so he rotated his hand, palm up, and found a special spot at her fullest depth, which he tickled with expert precision. Then, knowing her clitoris would want caressing, he began to work it with his thumb.
Her knees locked, her body tensed. She seemed to be reaching for what he wanted to bring her.
Gasps and cries echoed off the pine trees as Addie reached her climax, and Jesse imagined what that tight, innocent passage would feel like gripping his erection. His own arousal had grown painful while he tended to his lady's needs. Patience. Patience, Jesse. Let her have her moment.
At last Addie lay limp and panting, and Jesse withdrew his fingers from her intimate flesh. “My turn,” he told her, taking her hand and guiding it inside his trousers. He curled her fingers around his tumescence and showed her how to stroke him. A few slow, easy movements had him on the brink. Rising quickly from their bed, he stepped away and deposited his seed on the cold ground.
Shivering, he returned to their nest of decadent love play, slipping his arms around Addie again. She snuggled up against him, comfortable at last. And with their passion sated, they slipped easily into a peaceful sleep.
While she slept a different sensation of warmth and a comforting presence swirled around Addie.
“Who's there?” she called into the darkness.
There was no answer, but none was needed. No matter how the years passed, certain sights, sounds and scents would always remain potent in her memory.
“Mama?” Addie asked.
“Of course, little one,” came the reply.
“Why are you here, Mama?” she asked.
“I've come to collect your father,” she replied, her normally serene voice sparkling with amusement. “He seems to have lost his way. But I will always find him. We were meant for each other, you know.”
“Yes,” Addie replied. “I'm sure of that.”
“But while I was here, I wanted to check up on you.”
“Oh!” Addie felt a flash of embarrassment, even though she knew she was dreaming. “Did you see…?”
“I saw. You've found your soul mate. He's a good man, but a stubborn one with many silly ideas. You will have to be more stubborn than he is.”
Addie cast her dreaming eyes downward in the direction of her feet. They looked real, for all they weren't standing on anything that appeared to be solid. “He says he can't be with me.”
“He can. He only thinks he can't. He doesn't realize that the heart does not break once for all time. He doesn't know how much he's healed. How ready he is for a new chapter to unfold. Be strong and patient. You are the water. He is the rock. Water can shape rock, but you will need to use slow pressure and time. Pressure and time, Adeline.”
“I don't know if he's really worth so much. Sometimes I don't think much of him,” Addie admitted. “I mean, he's attractive, but he's also…”
“Fearful. Do not let yourself believe that fear is all he has. He fears loss and suffering. He fears losing more of himself. But he's braver than most in other ways. You can heal his fear and he can heal yours. The two of you complement each other. But his mind and heart are not ready, could not be made ready without you. This is your test as well as his, daughter. Who is more stubborn? Only you can decide that. He will yield, if you do not give up.”
Addie sighed. “I wish you were here, Mama. Dad too. It's hard being alone.”
“You are not alone, Adeline. You have never been alone. Remember that.”
“Yes, Mama.”
“I must leave you for a while. But remember my words. Tenacity, strength and time. You will earn your heart's desire.”
And then Addie found herself alone in her own mind, as pink light filtered through her closed eyelids revealing that dawn had arrived. She woke slowly, enjoying the warmth of the light, and the even greater warmth of the man who held her close in his arms. Tenacity, strength and time will wear away his fears.
Good advice, if she had the courage to take it. He could just as easily break my heart.
Chapter 6
The journey toward Colorado Springs passed in days of conversation and nights of naughty caressing. Try though he might, Jesse could feel no guilt about laying his hands all over Addie's sweet body. She in turn proved to be a most comfortable and relaxing bedmate, demanding only the pleasure he enjoyed giving her, and once she learned how, returning the favor eagerly. And when they weren't playing on the safe edges of passion, they were able to talk about a number of subjects. She rarely expressed interest in the girly things that normally bored him, like clothing. But she had sensible, informed opinions on various makes of guns, a vast wealth of knowledge about edible and medicinal plants, and an interest in history, one of his favorite subjects. Easy conversation made the long days pass swiftly.
Jesse felt tremendously relieved that Addie's sulk hadn't lasted long. They were fast becoming good friends… the best kind of friends. He couldn't keep a satisfied smirk off his face. He turned away to conceal it from her, but to no avail.
“What are you smiling about?” she demanded in mock outrage.
“How good you taste,” he replied, unabashedly watching her cheeks turn pink at the memory of his mouth on her lower parts. That had strained even her considerable aplomb. At the time, of course, she squirmed and shuddered like the hot blooded wench she was. But in the cold light of day, her blushes charmed him as much as her uninhibited response had the previous night.
“You're evil,” she muttered.
“And that's just the way you like me,” he retorted with a grin.
“You're right,” she admitted, meeting his eyes and smiling. “So where do we stop tonight? Are we camping again?”
Jesse shook his head. “There's a town a little ways down the road. I have friends there. One owns a boarding house. She'd be terribly offended if I didn't stay with her while I was in town.”
“How will you explain me?” Addie asked.
“As a friend in need of an escort,” he replied mildly. “It's true, after all. Don't worry, Addie. I may be a bounty hunter, but I have a good reputation. I don't think anyone will assume the worst.”
Addie gave him a look that clearly told him he was crazy, but didn't answer.
A couple of hours later, the town loomed up ahead of them. Unlike the low collections of plank and brick structures they'd passed so far, Cañon City, Colorado, was a proper town, with three and four story structures looming over a wide cobblestone street. As they proceeded, Addie noted a red brick hotel, three stories high and trimmed in green, the words St. Cloud Hotel emblazoned across the front. Several stately homes of the painted lady variety stood along the street, their opulence interspersed with mundane businesses and tumbledown shacks. From one, the rank stink of untended outhouse fouled the air.
“Doesn't this town have a sewer?” Add
ie asked, holding her nose.
“Of course,” Jesse replied. “But not every house has elected to connect to it.”
Addie shuddered, and then changed the subject. “Since we passed the hotel, I assume we're staying elsewhere? You mentioned a boarding house?”
“That's right,” Jesse replied. “A friend of mine, Mrs. Phillips, owns it. Her husband built it for her in anticipation of having many children. But they only had one daughter and then he died in a stagecoach robbery. I brought in the robber, and he was hanged. Mrs. Phillips has absolutely insisted I stay at her boarding house whenever I'm in town. She never lets me pay either.” A hint of a smile crossed Jesse's face, making Addie wonder if he'd comforted the widow in ways other than bringing the killer to justice.
Not liking the jealous feelings these unsubstantiated thoughts raised in her, she returned to her survey of Main Street. Behind the first row of structures, a second street at a higher elevation sported a church with a towering steeple and several more homes. Behind that, the backdrop of the grassy hill cut off abruptly into a blue, sunny sky.
“It's pretty here,” she commented.
“Yes,” Jesse replied. “It reminds me of home, in spite of the hills.”
“Where's home?” she asked him.
“Garden City, Kansas,” he replied. “Small and remote, and terribly, terribly flat.”
“Do you miss it?”
He shrugged. “Maybe, but I don't miss the memories.”
I wonder what unspoken agony just twisted his face so harshly. Something terrible must have happened there. Poor Jesse.
“I know what you mean,” Addie said in her gentlest voice. She reached down from Mercury's back and squeezed his shoulder. He rested his hand on hers briefly before they continued on their way.
“Here we are,” Jesse exclaimed, indicating a three story painted lady in a soft gray tone with masses of gingerbread hanging from the eaves.
Addie nodded approvingly at the subtle color. Like a winter sky, not garish the way some of these are painted. The house seemed to blend into the landscape as though it had grown up from the earth.
A hitching post at the front gate identified the building as a business rather than a residence. Jesse lifted Addie down from Mercury's back and tied up the horse before escorting her up onto the broad, welcoming white porch. A knock at the door was quickly answered by a woman who appeared to be about thirty years of age, her glossy brown hair pulled back into a braided bun, her generous curves hugged by a dress the same color as her house. She smiled, a broad, gap-toothed smile, and threw her arms around Jesse.
“Jesse, darling!” she gushed, squeezing him until his ribs creaked. Addie ground her teeth.
“Good to see you too, Anne,” he replied in a rasping wheeze. “Don't break my ribs.”
“Sorry!” The brunette released him with a kiss on the cheek. A pink stain remained behind.
Hmmm, Addie thought. I wonder if the curves are as false as the lips.
“Anne, this is my friend, Adeline McCoy. She recently lost her father, and I'm bringing her to her aunt in Colorado Springs.”
“Pleased to meet you, Miss McCoy,” the bubbly widow replied, her tone significantly restrained compared to how she'd greeted Jesse. “I'm sorry to hear about your loss.”
“Thank you,” Addie replied in a cool, soft voice.
“Jesse, your usual room is available,” the woman said, turning her back on them. “Miss McCoy, if you'll follow me, I'll show you to yours. I have men and women on different floors, for propriety's sake. Women are on the third floor… and the stairs creak like a shotgun. It protects everyone's reputation, you know. Breakfast is served at eight, lunch at noon, and dinner at seven. Let me know if you plan to eat, so I can have enough food.”
“We'll have dinner tonight, for sure,” Jesse said. “And likely breakfast too. But we're only staying tonight. This young lady is expected in Colorado Springs, and I'd like to see her safely there.”
“Be careful out there,” the woman replied. “There's a lot of unrest going on. A gang of train robbers has been troubling the high plains from Dodge City to Liberal. Rumor says they might have a hideout somewhere in the mountains.”
Jesse froze. “Train robbers on the High Plains? Has Garden had any trouble?”
“I haven't heard,” the woman replied. “But who knows? Garden is so small, it's easy to overlook.”
Jesse stepped back outside, apparently to collect their belongings and tend to Mercury while Mrs. Phillips led Addie up two flights of stairs; mahogany wood with polished banisters and a studded black runner up the center. And as predicted, the second staircase protested loudly under their combined weight. If anyone tried to sneak up during the night, they'd be caught instantly. Looks like I'll have to behave for one night anyway. It shocked Addie how desolate the thought made her. Falling in love in two weeks is stupid. I'm not stupid. It isn't love.
She had to face the fact that she had a silly schoolgirl crush on Jesse West. It's not his fault. He told you he can't love you. All he can do is play with you a while. And you agreed to it. Hell, Addie, you begged for it. If you get your heart broken, it's your own fault. For a moment the two dreams of her parents floated up before her, but she pushed them away. Dead parents don't come back in dreams to advise the living. She was on her own now, an adult, and her first adult decision had been decidedly unwise.
And yet, before you part ways from Jesse for good, you will let him touch you again. There was no denying it.
Mrs. Phillips led her through a long hallway with gas lights mounted on the walls and a smooth ceiling with plaster medallions every few feet, past several doorways to the very end, where she unlocked the last door on the right and handed Addie the key.
“Water closet is across the hall. See you at dinnertime,” the woman said curtly and walked away without a word.
Addie stepped over the threshold into a smallish room with a single bed, attractively framed in brass bars and warmed by a thick, blue and green crazy quilt. A bureau hugged the far wall, and a window on either side of the bed emitted spring sunlight in rectangular patches on shiny wood floorboards and a small green rag rug.
A series of loud creaks indicated someone coming up the stairs, and a moment later, Addie was unsurprised when a heavy hand knocked on her bedroom door.
She opened to find Jesse extending a bundle towards her. “I wrapped all your things in one of the blankets,” he said by way of explanation.
She took the bundle and set it on the bed, returning to her friend and regarding him with shy eyes. Ironic how we can lie together with our hands all over each other outside, but a bedroom makes me feel timid.
“Nice room,” he said, clearing his throat.
“Thanks,” she replied.
“Well, I'd better go.”
“Yeah, see you at dinner?”
“Sure.”
With that deadpan exchange, Jesse turned to leave. Addie began to close the door.
“Oh wait…” Jesse stepped back in her direction.
“Did you need something?” Addie asked.
“Yes,” he replied, grabbing her chin and pressing a quick kiss to her lips.
Then, like a naughty schoolboy, he fled down the hallway and disappeared down the stairs.
Feeling like a moonstruck girl, Addie touched her fingertips to her lips. Then she slowly shut the door and moved to the bed where she unwrapped her bundle and considered whether she had time to wash any of her clothes.
Jesse's heart pounded a long time after he left Addie standing stunned in the door of her bedroom. I've kissed her dozens of times. Why was that one so different? It must be the bedroom. In nature it was easy to do what was natural. Houses and bedrooms changed things. Imposed rules. A boy could kiss his sweetheart at the door, but he'd best not cross the threshold. And she's not your sweetheart, you ass. Being in town suddenly made Jesse feel like a cad. He knew, could see, that Addie had not abandoned the idea that they might have a future. Soon
she'll be feeling a bit abandoned. He winced. Maybe… he shook his head. There was no way he could keep her. Not as the girl he visited when he passed through her town and felt lonely. That would be a grave disservice to her. Nor could he marry her, for the same reason. While she sat home and worried, he'd be out chasing bail jumpers and bank robbers. He might never come home, and she might never know why. Not to mention she deserves a husband who can adore her.
Steeling his heart once again against the potent lure of her big brown eyes, he stalked out into the yard to tend to his horse.
Chapter 7
That night, dinner consisted of some of the best fried chicken Addie had ever eaten. The skin had been breaded in a flavorful crust and had the scorch marks consistent with a cast iron skillet. The meat dripped savory juices with every bite. As a veteran of many failed attempts to fry chicken, Addie's respect for the flamboyant brunette rose a few degrees. As did the appearance of her daughter at the table. The child, who looked to be somewhat under ten, showed no fear conversing with all the adults at the table and regaled them with funny stories about the children at school.
As dessert – a meltingly tender apple crisp – arrived on the table, the girl fell silent, intent on shoveling seasoned apples and crunchy oats into her mouth. One of the men spoke up.
“So, West, you just passing through?”
“That's right,” Jesse replied.
“You oughta come back this way,” the man urged, wiping a drip of spiced and thickened juice from his thick, bulbous lip. “There's some trouble 'round these parts. Don't rightly know what it is, but a few homesteads have been robbed, some burned. And I think there may have been a murder, way out on one of the remote farms. Leastaways, they found two bodies burned in their beds. It had been too long to tell if anything else had happened.”
High Plains Heartbreak (Love On The High Plains Book 3) Page 6
