Then he looked at Melanie. He leaned in and whispered in her ear. “You were beautiful already, but now you look like a movie star.” He kissed her cheek and stood again.
Her heart leapt. Did he really think that, or was he just saying it to make her feel better?
After they’d paid, they left the salon quickly. “The dress shop is just around the corner. We can go there next if you like,” Jason told her.
Melanie laughed. “Do you mean the boutique?” She liked when she laughed. It made her feel good, and she sure didn’t feel that way much lately.
“And yes please. I need to dump these horrid rags.”
His smile faded. She was a kill-joy. She knew it and he knew it. She was trying, she truly was, but she was only saying what she knew to be true.
They entered the boutique and she was in her element. They had the most beautiful clothes, which surprised her since it was a small-town boutique. She didn’t think the range would be so intensive.
The sales assistant helped her to choose a number of clothes and guided her to the changing rooms. Jason sat patiently, rocking the buggy while she tried on clothes.
She came out to show him an outfit she liked, and he watched intently. “You look great,” he said, smiling. She liked the outfit and put it aside.
She showed him each outfit, and he nodded each time, smiling at the same time. At the end, she didn’t know which ones to take.
He intervened. “We’ll take them all,” Jason told the assistant.
Melanie was horrified. “No! It’s too much,” she protested, but he would have none of it.
They walked out of the store with several bags of clothes, including the outfit Melanie had arrived in.
She moved close to him. “Thank you, Jason,” she said, her arm rubbing against his. “I am truly grateful. I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you.”
He stared at her, frowning. “This is a gift, Melanie,” he said crossly. “I don’t expect you to repay me.”
“I must,” she said quietly. “I mean...”
He interrupted her mid-sentence. “You’re the mother of my baby. I will look after you both.”
She was stunned. Was that all she was to him? The mother of his baby? Her heart sank. She felt hollow. Truly saddened.
Melanie wanted to cry, but she was not going to let him see how upset she was.
They walked silently back to his vehicle, depositing their purchases, then walked further up the road to Aunt Lizzie’s Kitchen.
“We’ll have lunch here,” Jason said. “I don’t know about you, but I’m famished.”
Melanie nodded, but her appetite had suddenly disappeared.
The little bell on the door tinkled as they entered.
Aunt Lizzie came running when she saw the buggy. “Oooooh, she’s beautiful,” she said, staring down at the sleeping baby. “How are you feeling, Melanie,” she asked. “You look wonderful. Not doing too much, I hope?”
Jason pulled her closer and put his arm up around her shoulders. It felt wonderful but was all for show. But she put her hand on his and savored the moment.
Her heart was beating rapidly at the contact, but she knew it would be over way too soon.
“She does look wonderful,” he said, looking down into Melanie’s face. “She’s beautiful.” He smiled at her, and Melanie’s heart swelled, but she knew it was just pretend.
“Ah, young love,” Lizzie said, smiling at them both. “So what is it? Coffee or lunch?”
Melanie wasn’t sure how long she could keep up the pretense.
“Lunch. Definitely lunch,” Jason said. “I’m starving.”
They were reading over the menu when Lizzie returned. “So when do you go back to work, Jason? You seemed to have been on leave for ages.”
Melanie cringed. Lizzie was right. It had been a little over two weeks already. Surely he’d have to go back soon? They hadn’t even discussed it. Or what would happen when he did go back.
Did he expect her and Lily to leave then? Or was he going to let them stay on a little longer? She sure hoped so.
She had no idea where they would go. With no family, they had nowhere to go.
Jason covered her hand with his. “I’m not going back for at least another couple of weeks,” he said looking across to Melanie. “I have a ton of leave owing, and the sheriff insisted I take at least a month off.”
He squeezed her hand and smiled. “Melanie might be sick of me by then.”
Lizzie stared at him. “A handsome and generous young fella such as yourself? Never,” she said.
Melanie echoed Lizzie’s thoughts. She would never get sick of Jason. She loved him. With all her heart. She just wished he would love her back.
Chapter Four
Lizzie offered to look after Lily, so they could have a night out.
Melanie was both excited and apprehensive. Jason could understand that; he felt the same way.
This would be the first time they’d left her alone with anyone.
It was normal to feel this way, he knew it was. Other new parents had told him, Rory and Missy included.
They’d done it and they’d survived. Baby Chloe had lived through it, and they would too.
Lily would probably sleep through the whole thing anyway.
They would have dinner at a restaurant in nearby Boulton, then go to a movie. There wasn’t a lot of choice, but Melanie had chosen a popular romantic comedy. Not his cup of tea, but for Melanie, he’d sit through it.
He’d booked a table at the prestigious new restaurant that had opened a few months earlier. It had a reputation for having amazing food.
They stood inside the door waiting to be seated, when the Maître d’ approached them.
“Sir, Madam,” he said, and led them to their table.
Jason watched as Melanie’s face lit up at being treated as special. As she sat, he whipped out the napkin and placed it in her lap.
He then turned her glass and filled it with water. He studied her face. It was obvious to Jason she felt like a movie star.
He really needed to take her out more often.
Then they were left alone, and Jason stared into her eyes. They were beautiful. The windows to her soul. Only she wasn’t letting him in. He desperately wanted in.
He wasn’t sure what he needed to do to get through to her, but he was sure going to try. His heart broke every time she turned away from him. Every time she rejected his advances.
He loved her with all his heart. Would do anything for her.
Hell, he would die for her.
“Melanie,” he whispered. “This is a pretty posh place.”
She laughed and her whole face lit up. “It sure is,” she whispered back.
He reached across the table and grabbed her hand. She looked at their entwined hands, but her face was giving nothing away.
He gave it a gentle squeeze. “I,” He was interrupted by their waiter.
“Your menus,” he said, handing them each a menu to peruse.
Jason felt cross, although he knew he shouldn’t. This was a restaurant – the waiters were doing normal restaurant things, like look after their customers.
But he wanted time alone with Melanie, and it wasn’t happening. He sighed. At least at the cinema they would be alone.
The food here was amazing. Better than he’d ever imagined, and knew they’d return. That was, if he could get Melanie to stay on.
His breath hitched, and his heart did a hiccup. Would he be successful? He sure hoped so. He didn’t want to lose either of them.
He looked down into his food. What would it take to get Melanie to trust him again?
He lifted his head to find Melanie staring at him. “What are you thinking?”
She was studying his face, and he felt suddenly subconscious. “Nothing much,” he said, pushing his food around the plate. “How amazing this food is. How we should come back. How much I missed you when you were gone.”
Did he really say that?
“I missed you too, Jason.” She said it so quietly he almost missed it.
He reached across and covered her hand, rubbing his thumb across it absently. He was about to respond, opened his mouth to speak, when the waiter interrupted them. Again.
“Your dessert menu,” he said handing a list over to each of them. “I recommend for you...”
Jason turned off, and instead, stared into Melanie’s eyes.
They were beautiful, her eyes. Just like the woman herself. He reached out and his fingers caressed her cheek. Her expression softened, and her face molded to his hand.
“Melanie, I,”
“Your dessert, Sir, Madam. I shall return with your coffee shortly.”
Jason sighed. The service here was admirable, but it was too much. Perfect for most people, but he wanted more privacy. Time to talk to Melanie. To tell her how he felt.
She looked down at her dessert. “This looks incredible,” she said, and smiled at him. “Thank you for bringing me here.”
But her smile quickly faded. “Melanie? What’s wrong,” he asked, covering her hand once more.
“I forgot about Lily,” she said. “I’m enjoying myself so much I forgot about our baby. I’m a horrible mother.”
Jason laughed, and she glared at him. He sighed and pulled out his cell phone. “Lizzie? Melanie wants to check on Lily.” He glanced across to Melanie and nodded. “Sure. Thank you,” he said. “And Lizzie? We both appreciate it. A lot.”
He finished the call, then directed his words to Melanie.
“She’s perfectly fine and has only woken once. Lizzie changed her diaper and she went back to sleep shortly afterwards.”
He squeezed her hand. “It’s completely normal to worry,” he said. “Especially since this is the first time leaving our precious little girl.”
Melanie nodded, but still seemed unhappy. “Eat your dessert. The movie will be starting soon.”
He didn’t like her being unhappy. She deserved to be happy. Deliriously happy. He needed to fix that. Would fix that – sooner rather than later.
~~~
Melanie snuggled up as close to Jason as she could get, but it wasn’t close enough.
Cinema seats are not conducive to lovers or would-be lovers. They were geared more toward people wanting to watch a movie.
They sat at the back, where it was near empty. Jason had been pedantic about sitting where they’d have more privacy. And Melanie was more than a little happy about that.
So far, all they’d seen were advertisements. The main feature, the movie, was what they’d come for. She had carefully chosen a romantic movie, hoping Jason might get the hint.
He was the nicest man she knew, more than generous, and he treated her like a princess.
More than a princess, he made her feel like a queen. But what was the point of that if he didn’t return her love?
Melanie died a little more inside every time she thought about it.
The advertisements ended, the curtains closed, and the lights went down, bringing her out of her thoughts. Then just as quickly the curtains opened again, and the movie began.
It was the age-old story. Man and woman meet, they fall in love, but there are obstacles to their love.
Much the same as their situation. She bit back a sob as her eyes filled with tears.
As though he knew, Jason reached across and held her hand. He offered her popcorn, but Melanie waved him away. She didn’t dare speak for fear of breaking down.
Right there, and right now.
She felt the warmth of his big hand and felt somewhat comforted. “Jason,” she whispered, against her better judgement. He leaned into her.
As he turned, she shook her head, changing her mind. Coward!
What was she meant to say? I love you dearly, can you please love me back? Even if it’s only for the sake of our daughter?
No. That would never work, and she wouldn’t want it to. She wanted all or nothing, and the way things were going, it would be nothing.
She felt errant tears trickle down her face.
Jason didn’t love her. Not in the true sense.
Sure, he had feelings for her. They would never have had a baby together otherwise. But he’d never come out and told her he loved her. Never said those three magic words.
The words every woman longs to hear from the man she believes to be her soulmate.
Communication was never their strong point. Jason’s work consumed him a lot of the time. It wasn’t like a 9-5 job where you could turn it on and off. As much as Melanie would have liked it to be.
Even when they were out on a date, if someone broke the law, Jason would step in.
Melanie groaned quietly. It was one of the things she loved about him, and yet, it was also one of the things that had threatened to tear them apart.
Maybe that was why the sheriff had insisted he have so much time off? To force them get to know each other all over again without interruption.
Clever man, that sheriff.
He leaned into her. “Good movie,” he whispered, then kissed her lightly on the cheek. Suddenly his hand went up to her face. “What’s wrong?” he asked urgently.
She swiped at her cheeks, trying to hide the tears. “Nothing’s wrong,” she said quietly, lying to not only herself, but also to Jason.
“Tell me,” he said, worry in his voice.
She waved her hands in the air and forced herself to breath. This was neither the time or the place. “Hormones,” she whispered. “Nothing to worry about.”
She watched as he let go of the breath he’d been holding, then he squeezed her hand again.
She liked it when he touched her. No. She loved it when he touched her. It didn’t have to be an intimate type of touch. Just holding her close or holding her hand like he was now.
It made her feel good all over. She really missed the way they used to be. Before she left. Before she ruined both their lives by not telling him they were having a baby.
She turned back to the movie, but Melanie could feel his eyes on her. Watching her, studying her every move. It took all her effort not to turn her head and look at him.
“Melanie,” he said quietly.
She slowly turned toward him, and his hands came up, cupping her face. He began to lean into her.
Melanie looked into his eyes. His eyes that always got to her. They were beautiful, and they were unique. Sometimes she felt like she could see right down to his core when she stared into them.
She studied his face. He had laughter lines around his eyes as well as his mouth. Jason was so special to her, and she wanted to know every little bit of him.
His tongue darted out of his mouth, and he licked his lips. Her hand went up and touched his whiskers. She loved the way he always left a shadow on his chin when he shaved. It was very appealing. Sexy even.
She watched as he continued to move slowly toward her, and her heart rate went up. She felt it in her chest, in her throat, and in her head.
Why was she reacting like this?
Jason closed the distance between them and gently kissed her lips. Melanie felt light-headed with excitement.
Was this the first step toward mending their relationship? She certainly hoped so.
~~~
Jason’s heart raced, and he felt sweat forming on his forehead.
The closer he got, the faster his heart seemed to beat. This was crazy. He’d kissed Melanie before. Loads of times.
Of course, that was before.
Before she’d abandoned him without a word.
Without telling him she was pregnant with his baby.
Giving him no choice.
For a heart-beat he considered backing off. His eyes locked with hers and he saw them pleading with him.
He wasn’t going to change his mind. He wanted to kiss her.
And he certainly wasn’t averse to kissing her soft lips.
As he moved in, she closed her eyes gently, and let herself lean into him. She tasted of p
opcorn and pop, and he savored the moment.
He heard her softly moan, and he smiled against her lips.
The kiss only lasted seconds, but it felt like forever.
It seemed like a lifetime since he’d kissed her. Since he’d held her tight. And since they’d been as one.
When the kiss ended, he embraced her. One arm came up around her, the other still holding the popcorn, damn it.
Without a second thought, Jason dumped the container of popcorn on the floor and held her tight. He felt Melanie’s arms go around him, and the rest of the world disappeared.
Nothing mattered except Melanie, right here in his arms. His beautiful Melanie, the one he thought he’d lost all those months ago.
“Tell me I haven’t lost you,” he whispered in her ear, his voice raspy with emotion.
Her lack of response was breaking his heart. “Melanie?” He pushed back and looked into her face.
She licked her lips before speaking. “It’s going to be... difficult,” she said softly, the movie still playing in the background. “I’ve lost your trust.” Her voice was breaking, but she continued. “And that’s on me.”
She leaned forward and back into his embrace. “I want this to work out, I really do,” she whispered in his ear. “If for no other reason, but for Lily.”
Before tonight, Jason had no idea what it would feel like when your heart shattered.
Chapter Five
Jason stood looking down into Lily’s basinet.
He did not want to leave his baby. Didn’t want to do this at all; it was heartbreaking. But he had to return to work.
He’d had his month of leave, and now had to go back to being a police officer and not only a dad.
He swallowed hard.
How did other fathers do this?
He’d thoroughly enjoyed the time he’d had at home. Loved the long walks with Lily in her buggy, the times cuddling her when she cried, and had especially enjoyed her bath-times.
He always felt at home in his uniform, but today he just wanted to rip it off. It felt almost suffocating, but he was fully aware it was more about leaving Lily than anything.
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