by Emma Vikes
His voice had dropped when he said those words and it made my heart hammer faster in my chest but whatever sexual tension that was building between us was cut short by my son screaming Leo’s name. Leo’s demeanour changed as Max jumped into his arms, almost toppling the two of them over. Leo laughed as Max stood up, pulling Leo with his little arms.
Leo ruffled his hair, kneeling down to be in the same level as him. “I’ve missed you, bud. I finished all my work early so I could see you again.”
“Does that mean...you’ll join us...at the aquarium?”
My eyes met Leo’s and then he stood up slowly, his gaze focusing behind me. I glanced back to see Jared, his jaw clenched as he took in Leo. This was his first time seeing Leo in person, a face to the man that I’d told him about for years. In front of me, Leo cleared his throat and smiled warmly, the charming persona that he always had, and extended a hand for Jared to shake.
“I’m Leo Hudson.”
I anticipated Jared’s response. Normally, Jared was the sweetest and warmest guy you’d ever have the chance of meeting. But he was protective of me and Max and he could be hostile and rude to Leo if he wanted to. But I heard him let out a deep breath and shake Leo’s hand and when I glanced at him, he offered Leo a slight smile.
“Jared Cole, it’s nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you,” Jared said, looking at Leo with raised eyebrows.
But it didn’t seem to faze Leo because he merely shrugged. “Good things I hope.”
Max tugged at Leo’s hand. “Will you...come?”
Leo glanced at us for a moment and then turned back to Max. “If your Mom and Jared allows me to.”
I looked back at Jared. His mouth was in a thin line and I could see the contemplation in his eyes. Max let go of Leo’s hand and went to take Jared’s, tugging at the older man and looking up at him with his big gray eyes and pouting. “Please, Jared?”
I watched as Jared’s eyes softened and he tried to stop himself from sighing in front of Max. I tried to refrain myself from chuckling in amusement. He was always so soft when it came to my son. Slowly, Jared nodded his head and then ruffled Max’s mop of curly brown hair, his hand slowly slipping to the younger boy’s cheek and then to his chin and Jared gently tilted up Max’s head so their eyes met.
“If you want him around, Maxy. Of course.” His voice was so quiet when he said that and he looked at Leo, as if regarding him in a different light, letting the other man know that he wasn’t thrilled with the idea of Leo hovering around us but he couldn’t do anything because Max wished him to come. I glanced at Leo briefly, enough to see him nod slowly, a sign of respect and acknowledgment.
Max, completely oblivious of the silent exchange between the two men, hugged Jared tight. He turned back to Leo. “I have something...to show you!”
He reached for Leo’s hand to drag him inside but Leo’s phone rang. He glanced at the phone and something flashed in his eyes and he looked at Max, smiling slightly. “You go ahead. I’ll hurry up. I just need to answer the call.”
Max went inside with Jared, leaving me and Leo on the front porch. Surprisingly, Leo answered the call out of earshot from me which was unusual because he had seemed to be so comfortable with me that he didn’t care if I listened in on the conversation he had with his clients. But as I watched Leo converse on the phone, an uneasy feeling settled on the pit of my stomach because he looked worried and anxious, running a hand over his tied hair over and over again.
Finally, he finished the call but when he ended it, he stared at his phone for a long moment and from afar, I could see his left eye twitching, something that he did whenever he was annoyed or nervous. He let out a long exhale and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. He slipped his phone in his pocket and when he turned to me, I tried to act like I wasn’t watching him.
I felt his presence beside me in a moment and Leo wrapped his arms from behind me, pulling me closer to him and kissing the back of my head. “I really missed you and I miss seeing you when I wake up.”
I turn around and hugged him tight, closing my eyes as Jared’s words echoed in my mind. I looked at Leo, peaking at him through my lashes. “Is there something wrong Leo?”
Something flashed in his eyes and his hands dropped. Suddenly he seemed uneasy and uncertain and he blinked a couple of times. “Is there something you want to say?”
He shook his head and smiled at me faintly. “It’s just about the studio. It’s not big of a deal.”
“It seems to bother you,” I told him softly. There was a part of me that really wanted to urge him to tell me, that he could tell me anything even the things that he claimed he could handle. I wanted him to tell me because that’s what I was here for, that telling each other was what a relationship was all about.
But we didn’t really have an official relationship, did we?
Leo stared at me for a moment and I could see the hesitation flickering in his gray eyes but again, he simply smiled and shook his head. “It’s not a big deal, Ellie. I’ll go head up to Max now. Anyway, where are we going?”
My heart sank, knowing that he was trying hard to divert the topic to stop my suspicion. He didn’t trust me. That single thought gnawed at my heart, chipping it slightly. But I couldn’t really accuse him for doing so right? I mean, what right did I have to do so?
“This big ocean park in the next town over. It just opened about a month ago and Jared had promised Max to bring him there when he comes to visit in Irving. That’s why Max never asked you to take him there. He was holding on to Jared’s promise to bring him there.”
Leo nodded, understanding. “Then I’m going to take thousands of pictures of him there to document his first trip.”
I smiled, faintly as his was earlier, and nodded. “That would be great. Actual pictures are still different from the crappy ones phones can take.”
Leo grinned and then took my hand, pulling me close to him again and kissing my forehead. “They’re special. That’s why I’ll take a million and one photos of you.”
Despite the unease I felt, I placed a hand on his cheek, my thumb rubbing his face gently, tenderly and I leaned into his touch, closing my eyes and inhaling the familiar scent, wrapping myself in his warm embrace, letting the warmth that I felt fill me up completely.
Still, deep in the recesses of my heart, the unease settled. Leo was hiding something from me, just like how he had hidden the offer made by Steve Maddock, seven years ago.
And that thought alone was enough to fill me with dread and fear.
CHAPTER 16
Leo
I was sitting with Max in the backseat of Eleanor’s station wagon while Jared drove us to the next town where the ocean park was, casually talking to Ellie and basically pretending like I wasn’t there. I could feel Eleanor glancing back at me through the rear view mirror and in the instances our eyes met, I could hear the unspoken question she kept asking and I would simply nodded, telling her I was fine.
It was a good thing that I had Max with me because he filled me in on yesterday’s events in school and told me about the upcoming basketball game. “Basketball game? You want to join, Max?”
Eleanor looked at her son, the surprise clear in her golden eyes. Beside me, Max fidgeted in his seat and shyly nodded. “It’s a father-son game but...I just thought...Leo could...,” and then Max paused, sighed and turned his head back to the window, “never mind.”
Eleanor and I looked at each other and I caught the way Jared’s hands tightened on the steering wheel. For a moment, I wondered if he was mad because Max wanted to ask me and not him because...
I looked at Jared closely. His hair was curly as Max’s and his eyes were pale blue, pale enough to be mistaken as gray. Max had gray eyes, like I did. Jared was by Eleanor’s side throughout the whole pregnancy but they clearly never became a couple and Max didn’t call him Dad. Maybe Max didn’t know that Jared was his Dad. Or maybe Max’s dad was someone else and Jared just felt protective over Max becaus
e he practically raised the kid and felt like he was the one meant to fill the role.
When Jared stopped the car on a red light, he let out a long exhale and then turned to Max, smiling slightly. “You want Leo to play the game with you?”
Max looked at Jared. “It’s a two part...game. One for kids...and then for dads...but I know that...”
“I’m sure Leo would love to join you,” Jared said, surprising me. I stared at him but his gaze was focused on Max. Even Eleanor seemed surprised with what he just said. She reached out and placed a hand on his thigh and Jared briefly glanced at her but focused his attention to Max, “that is, if you really want him to.”
I could then feel Max’s gaze on me, looking at me with bright, vibrant gray eyes, filled with hope and a longing that I knew was because he lacked a constant and real paternal figure in his life. It tugged at my heart. My Dad died when I was young but not as young as Julian had been then. I’d witnessed how Milo forced himself to grow up and mature right after, to make sure that our youngest brother had a father-figure in his life and although Julian had adapted my ways with women, he was as respectful and kind in the sense that our father wanted us to become. Milo did a good job and as I looked at Max, I knew I wanted to do the same thing too, even if he wasn’t biologically mine.
“You know that I would say yes before you could even ask,” I said, jabbing my finger on his side and making Max giggle, his face lighting up when he realized that I was going to do it.
“Really?”
I nodded and then ruffled his hair affectionately, the way Dad used to ruffle my curls when I was Max’s age. “No doubt. When is it so I can make sure I’m free that day?”
“On the 14th of September.”
We were on the last few days of August and September was going to roll by soon. It wasn’t that I was fully-booked on September but that was the only time that I was given to reach the amount I needed for the studio which meant that I had to work harder to make sure that I could reach the amount needed by the end of it.
But what was one day off, right? I can always work
The car moved forward when I nodded my head, smiling at Max. “Sure. We have to make sure that we practice every morning until the big day, right? Both your team and mine, it has to win.”
I held up my right pinky finger for Max to loop his with and he didn’t hesitate in doing so and then he wrapped his small arms tightly around my neck, snuggling closer to me. In a very quiet voice- one that could barely be heard by Eleanor and Jared who had now started to have a conversation between themselves- Max said, “I wish you were my Dad.”
By the time we arrived at the ocean park, my mind was filled with an array of thoughts, all regarding Max’s father. There had been so many times that I wanted to ask Eleanor but didn’t want to ruin the fragile relationship that I formed with her. Despite the closeness and comfortability that we had now, I was still in no position to pry about the last seven years that had happened to her and how she had Max.
Max was glued to Jared’s side the moment we entered and I realized that Jared knew so much about the marine animals that we pass by and could even offer Max a trivia and fun facts. Max was on Jared’s back as the four of us travelled around the big aquarium complex. But I didn’t mind. It meant that Eleanor was walking right beside me.
I reached for her hand and interlaced it with mine. She glanced at our hands and rolled her eyes but didn’t pull away. “Jared’s kind of a nerd, huh?”
Eleanor laughed and nodded. “He wanted to be a marine biologist. He was crazy about marine animals since I’d known him. There’s just something about the ocean that pulls him in, you know? Red’s been drawn to the waters for so long that it’s hard to take him out. Also why he followed me to Miami.”
My eyebrows raised at the last statement. “He followed you to Miami?”
She shrugged as we followed Jared and Max and the two of them were laughing in front of us. Max held on tightly to Jared and I’d never really seen Max so carefree and at ease with another guy than me. Jared must’ve felt the same way when he saw me with Max. “Yes. He was already offered a spot in Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute as a researcher. It’s in Massachusetts and around that time that he finally received the offer, I received an offer in a firm in Miami and Max and I had to go there.”
I swallowed, realizing that what she meant was that Jared dropped something huge just to follow her to a different country. “He didn’t accept the offer then.”
Eleanor smiled and looked at Jared who had put Max back on his feet and was pointing at huge see-through glass that was filled with water and marine animals on the other side. There was a gentle fondness in her eyes as she looked at him. “Jared would go to the ends of the earth for Max and I. He was willing to drop his job at the marine conservatory in Miami to follow us back to Irving if I didn’t convince him to stay there.”
I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to respond to that. The feelings that Jared had for her were clear and she knew what his intention was. It made my heart sink, knowing that during the time that I wasn’t there, there was someone else filling the shoes, being the better man. Perhaps, Jared is the better man for her.
“He’s in love with you,” I said quietly, letting go of her hand and stopping, turning to face her. Eleanor glanced briefly at my hand and then her eyes flickered to meet mine. The answer to the question I was about to say would either break my heart or make me happy. “Why didn’t you two just get together?”
Eleanor pouted and smiled, reached for my hand and laced it with hers, squeezing mine gently. “Because we can’t really dictate what our hearts want, yea? And besides, it would be unfair to Jared. I could never love him the way he loves me.”
“Or the way you love me?” I offered, unable to contain myself as I tried to bite back the smile from forming but I was really unable to do so.
Eleanor paused, realizing what she just said and rolled her eyes, pulling her hand away from mine. “Never said that, Leo.”
I laughed as I watched her make her way to Jared and Max and when she turned to glance back at me, her golden eyes glinting playfully as I followed her. When I was beside her again, I wrapped my arms around her shoulder, squeezing her gently as we stopped beside Jared and Max. Jared glanced at us briefly, acknowledging the way Eleanor and I held each other but didn’t comment on it. There wasn’t even a flash of jealousy in his eyes. Maybe he had been the better man for her in the last seven years but I intend to be one too.
My phone buzzed in my pocket and I fished it out, seeing the email that Steve Maddock sent. I licked my lips and nervously glanced at Eleanor. She was laughing along at what Jared had said and Max held her hand and the three of them walked in front of me as I read Maddock’s email about the gallery.
He called me earlier today, wanting to know my decision and I told him I needed to know the details first before I made one. I wanted to see if I could fit it in my timeframe and the already booked schedules that I’d made with clients. I read Maddock’s email and I stared at the date, September 13, and I breathe out a sigh of relief when I realized that it wouldn’t happen during the basketball game because the game would happen after and Eleanor would never know because I had a feeling she wouldn’t be too thrilled to know that I was in contact with Maddock again. He was still one of the things that we hadn’t discussed but I knew that if I brought him up, it would open old wounds that had already been healing.
“Leo?”
I looked up and met Jared’s pale blue eyes. I hadn’t noticed that they’d moved and I was standing at the same place and I could see Eleanor and Max looking at another aquarium and probably at another animal. I stuffed my phone in my jean pocket and made a start towards Eleanor and Max but Jared held up a hand.
“Coffee?” Jared asked, looking at me expectantly and I realized what he was trying to do. He wanted to talk to me alone and when I looked Eleanor and Max, she was looking at us with worry in her golden eyes. But then she caught me starin
g and she nodded her head gently, smiling faintly as she moved Max to another part of the park. “Elle wanted to have a cup and Max was getting hungry. I told her we could look for food here somewhere and then text her where we were.”
I nodded my head and followed him to where the map was. Jared’s hands flew over the touch screen LCD, looking for a place to eat. “It says here that it’s right where the sea turtles sanctuary.”
“You think they serve turtle meat?” I joked as the two of us headed over there.
Jared looked at me, paused and shook his head. “It’s not a funny joke, Leo.”
“I have a feeling that whatever joke I say, you’re not going to like it simply because it came from me,” I replied dryly as we maneuvered our way around the park.
He didn’t say anything back until we reached the food place. He ordered three cups of coffee and a grilled cheese sandwich for Max. He turned to me. “You want anything else?”
I nodded and scanned the menu, ordering a fish burrito for myself and Jared ordered his and Eleanor’s lunch. He pulled out his phone and texted- Eleanor, probably- and then stuffed it inside his pocket as he paid the amount. I made a move to get my wallet but he raised a hand and shook his head and I rolled my eyes, letting him pay for my meal.
“So why do you want me to tag along to you when you’re just being rude?” I asked as I carried the tray filled with our drinks.
Jared sat across from me and shrugged. “What makes you think that I wanted you to tag along? Max wanted you to come. I have no choice in that matter.”
I pursed my lips and sighed. “You’d do anything for Max, wouldn’t you?”
Jared was in the middle of putting sugar in his coffee and he stirred it for a moment before he looked at me, regarding me intently with his pale blue eyes. “I would move heavens and earth for that kid, Leo. I love him like I would my own son.”
“So I’m guessing you’re not his Dad.”
