by C Cato
September 27, 2023
There was a gitch in the lab today. It was an unfortunate loss. The holding tank sprung a leak. Half of the viable genesis samples were lst to exposure before we were able to lock down the leak. That is millions of dollars gone in a matter of minutes. Of course, I remoed the moronic lab technician, but the damage was done. I need more comptent help if I want this project to succeed. This would be a moot point if Sonya was hee, but she is dead and gone.
Muscles twitched while reading the entry. Dead? It hadn’t occurred to her what Ian had said to her family. Had her momma gone to her grave thinking she’d died? “Cole?”
“Do you need me, baby?”
Butterflies danced in her abdomen. “I found a journal entry where Ian says I was dead. Did he tell my family I had died? Did you know?”
The reply was cold. “No. I didn’t know. I had asked, but he told me he’d handled it. That bastard!”
She shared the sentiment. Pages blurred, and she wiped her face. How could he do that to her? To her family?
“Do you want me to come out there?”
“No,” she sniffed and dabbed at her eyes with the back of her hand. “I’m okay; thank you, Cole.”
“Anytime.”
Reading the line again it made her blood boil. The pain it caused to her family. A coma would have been better than dead. Ian robbed her family of that, taken and for what? To protect his weapon project?
The distraction of figuring out a puzzle—even a poorly made one—was welcome. She stared at the letters written in the margin. Lover. Why would he use that word? So far, his words had been something that would be related to the project. Was this something else?
“Hey everyone,” she transmitted. There was a twinge of pain reminding her that she was at the edge of her new range. After the last experience, she thought it was a good idea to let everyone know what was about to happen. “I’m going to play a message.”
“Go for it, Doc. I’m already comfy, so no fear of falling down from a boring Ian lecture on Sentinel control,” teased Soren.
Sonya shook her head. The man seemed to be allergic to being serious.
Halo? Lover.
Ian’s face filled her vision. This was the more put together version she knew, although thinner.
“This is probably going to be awkward, and I apologize for that. I couldn’t figure out a way to keep these messages private. The processors in your Halo nets just aren’t that sophisticated. It takes all of you to house the data, and it plays for all of you.”
“Cole, this message is for you.” Ian fidgeted in his chair. “By now you know I wasn’t entirely honest, and I’m sorry. For so many things. I need you to know that I love you, but I know now I wasn’t very good at it. When you first told me about your feelings for Sonya, I was jealous. I’m still not sure if I was jealous because I loved her, too, and felt possessive, or because I didn’t want you to love her more than me. Sometimes I think the reason I suggested you go through the transformation was because I liked the idea of having you both on ice. Ready for me when all of this was finally over. I know that’s wrong of me. I know. It was selfish. I also deluded myself into thinking you had done it for me. Maybe you did. A little bit?”
A hand flew to her mouth in shock. Cole and Ian had been lovers? Had Cole, become a Sentinel to please Ian? Did that mean he hadn’t really wanted to do it? To be with her? Her skin prickled like shards of ice were hitting her from all directions.
“It was wrong of me to try and talk you out of how you felt. Not that it mattered. I saw you every night. Sitting with her. Reading to her. That silly little book that you loved so much. Could hear how much you cared even though you had never spoken to her. I still believe you fell in love with the idea of her, but I don’t really think that would be a problem for the two of you. She is overly cautious but will trust with unswerving loyalty once it’s given, and you are insanely devoted. Neither of you would have fallen into something unhealthy.”
Ian rose from his desk and skirted it to brace with his hands on the front. “I’m glad you are with her now. I really am. She’s strong and brilliant, but she doesn’t know as much as she thinks she does. Don’t let her make you think differently. Take care of each other. She’s been hurt. By the man she loved, and by me. She deserves to be happy. You both do.”
The video was gone, and she blinked several times to bring her eyes back into focus. Cole stood at the top of the loft ladder, eyes the size of golf balls and mouth gaping open. He stood at the edge of the loft, by the ladder. Several times, he took a step forward only to retreat again.
Finally, he spoke. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t want you to know.”
“Know what?” she asked, trying to keep the sadness from her tone. “That you’re bisexual, or that you only did this to make your lover happy?”
Cole closed the distance and dropped to his knees in front of her on the blanket.
“You’re wrong. He was wrong. I didn’t do it for him. It’s true we were together, and I loved him. But I knew with him there would always have to be a choice,” he shook his head, sitting back on his heels. “I’m not explainin’ right.”
“What do you mean?”
His eyes were pleading, but what did he want from her? Patience? Understanding? “My greatest desire was that you would wake up and the three of us could be together. He would tell you how he felt, and you and I would get to know each other. It’s stupid really.”
That was something to think about. He wanted to live a life like Celene and her husbands? With her. Heat bloomed in her cold chest. Could she do it? Live up to the fantasy? Keet appeared in her mind’s eye. Him standing with Cole. Then she was on the cliff, sharing a moment of quiet mourning with him when they left him behind. If they had freed Keet, is that what it would have been like? The three of them together? “Why did you think I would want that any more than Ian?” She instantly hated herself as soon as the words left her mouth.
Shoulders fell, chin dropping to his chest. Posed in utter defeat.
“You’re not the only one that can put a foot in it. I didn’t mean that as it sounded. Cole. I’m not like Ian. I’m not used to the idea of being with more than one person, but until you and—” She didn’t want to say his name. Being apart from him was still an open wound that grated her soul with every beat of her heart. “Until the other day, I didn’t exactly have men beating down my door, but how could you decide you loved me?”
“It’s true that I didn’t know you, but when I saw you I just knew. Ian showed me a video of you once. Your sisters wedding that you attended with Ian.
Everyone was on the dance floor, and the camera panned to you. You were alone at a table, and the sadness—it crushed me. The candid view of you had been so raw. I knew that same loneliness. You were a kindred spirit.”
He gazed at her with an intensity that made her gasp. “Maybe I was wrong. I could have imagined it all. Created something in my head like Ian said. If so, I’m sorry.”
“You weren’t wrong,” she said, softly. No one had ever understood her as well, as the man in front of her and they had never even met. “After my betrayal at the hospital, I had a hard time with any kind of relationship. I still had my family, but I pushed them away, too. The panic attacks made it hard for me to get close to anyone. I was lonely. I threw myself into my PhD and then into my research. Anything to keep my mind off how I felt. But at night, I always went home to an empty house.” A hot tear dripped from her chin. Cole wiped it away with his thumb. When had he moved?
“I’m not expectin’ you to instantly fall in love with me,” he said. “I wanted to woo ya. Take you out to dinner. Buy you things,” he said, and waved his hand to encompass the barn, with a rueful smirk. “I guess that’s not happenin’ now.”
Sonya imagined Cole picking her up in a fancy suit and taking her to her favorite Italian restaurant, his beautiful smile charming everyone around him as he doted on her. She wanted that. She wanted this man who h
ad an infinite well of empathy and a gruff exterior. Everything she knew was gone, but here was something better.
“You can woo me,” she said, smiling through the flush of heat in her face.
His smile melted all reason. If there was any opposition to being with this man—and possibly others in the future—it dissolved when he turned that smile loose on her.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Sonya
“Who the hell ever first invented the axe should be shot,” Sonya muttered under her breath. She bent to pick up the wood that wouldn’t stay in its proper place and lifted the axe over her shoulder determined to get this right.
Everyone had fully recovered and no longer needed her to care for them, so she wanted to make sure she was still pulling her weight. When she saw the woodpile was dwindling, she figured chopping some more would be an easy task.
That wasn’t proving to be the case.
With a heavy grunt, she swung the axe down toward the unsuspecting wood. It hit without cutting, sending the block flying to the left of the stump.
At least it hadn’t shot into her legs again.
She stomped over to the stubborn wood and placed it down hard on the stump. “You and I are going to come to an understanding,” she said, hefting the axe. “I’m going to swing this thing, and you’re going to cooperate and split. That’s the only way we’re both going to get out of this.”
“Need some help?”
Sonya hopped with a startled scream and turned to see Cole, the blade falling from her shoulder. “Really, Cole! It’s not right to sneak up on someone that way.”
Ten feet away, he leaned against a large stone with his arms crossed. “Sorry.” A twitching smirk said the opposite. “Just looked like you were strugglin’ and I wanted to help.”
A war waged in her head. Take the offer and not possibly cut something vital off and feel condescended to. Not take the offer, appear a fool in front of the gorgeous man. “You think I can’t do this myself. I’m a smart woman. I’ll figure it out.”
“Not denyin’ you’re a smart woman. It’s the most attractive thing about you, but could I just demonstrate for you? I have a lot of experience choppin’ wood. Promise I’ll let you chop all you want after that.” He held up two fingers. “Scout’s honor.”
Sonya dropped the axe to the ground, leaning on it like a cane. “Okay, but this is only to teach me the proper way to do it. I will chop the wood. And I can completely see you as a scout. Yellow kerchief and all.”
Cole held up his hands in surrender, the smirk growing. “No problem. If you want to chop, I won’t stop ya.”
Swaying hips gave a predatory saunter that made her mouth water. The movement was hypnotic. Sonya couldn’t turn away. Lifting his shirt, he revealed tight chiseled abs with a light trail of blond hair that shone in the late autumn sun.
“Is this part of the lesson?” she asked, breathlessly. “Do I need to take my shirt off?”
The axe slid out of her hands, and he lifted it to his shoulder. She stepped out of the way, not wanting to lose a limb to a wild swing. She needn’t have worried. Cole was a natural. He placed the log she’d been trying to hack at back on the stump and positioned his hands on the handle.
“Position is important,” he said, glancing at her with a boyish smile.
It made her wet and wanting.
“Make sure you choke up on the handle near the blade for more control.”
Sonya wasn’t sure she heard him right; she was so dazed by his godly appearance. Muscles so defined she could name them individually danced along his back and shoulders. The expanse wide. She followed the line of his latissimus dorsi as they tapered down the sides of his back and terminated in a tight narrow waist. Her mouth went dry as she imagined what was below the tight black pants he wore.
Raising the blade from his shoulder, he brought it down decisively on the unsuspecting log, splitting it violently in half.
Sonya was more than a little impressed.
“Now you,” he said, crossing to the pile of unsplit logs to grab another.
A pulse of warmth shot through her when she realized he wasn’t going to just take over. He turned the axe, holding the blade and offering the handle to her. She took it, a grin blooming. He removed the split wood to the cut pile and put the new on the stump.
Stepping up to it, she expected Cole to stand aside, but he sidestepped and pressed in behind her. There was a bite of cold in the air despite the sun shining on them, but that vanished when his heat engulfed her. She sucked in a breath and forgot to let it go.
“Relax,” he said.
Sonya would have sworn his voice had dropped an octave. Not quite a baritone, but deep enough to make her skin tingle. Placing his hands on her shoulders, they trailed down her arms to her hands and repositioned them in the same way he’d held it before. His big hands covered her own. She finally released the air she’d been holding in a shaky sigh and forgot to breathe again when his lips met the back of her neck. Her head fell forward to give him better access and he obliged by raining nibbling kisses down the length of her neck. When he moved closer, the hardness at her hip rivaled the handle in her hand.
“Is this how you… woo a woman?” she asked, breathlessly.
“You are so beautiful,” he whispered, moving to bite and then lick the shell of her ear.
She melted in his arms.
“So exotic. I’ve never—”
The words were a bucket of cold water over her head. The mood was broken. Exotic. She wasn’t going to be his dark-skinned fantasy. Sonya stiffened and drew away from his hold. The axe was clutched to her chest like a barrier and turned to face him.
“You’ve never what? Fucked a black girl before? Looking for a new thrill?”
Cole recoiled, and his mouth fell open. “What? No! I mean, I’ve never… but no!”
“I’m not a damn novelty item to be picked up and thrown away when your fun is done!”
His brows narrowed in a pained frown, but his body relaxed. “Where is this comin’ from?”
Sonya realized she was breathing heavily and inhaled hard to steady it before she answered. “That man I told you about. The doctor. When I confronted him, I was so angry, I thought he loved me. He told me that I couldn’t really have believed he would consider a long-term relationship with me. That I was a fun novelty fuck, but no respectable man would take me home to meet his parents.” Angry, hot tears splashed on her hands as they maintained a death grip on the axe.
Cole’s pained expression darkened, and his hands fisted at his sides. The muscles at his neck tightened. “He was white?”
“Yes.”
“Fucker,” he growled.
Sonya gasped.
“So, you thought I was like him? That I couldn’t possibly like you for you? Just a momentary hop in the sack?”
She tried answering, but something lodged in her throat. She could only mouth the word. “Yes.”
“Oh, Sonya,” he said, his voice softening. He closed the gap between them and pried her fingers from the axe to set it down beside the stump. He pushed the uncut log aside and sat down, pulling her down with him and arranging her across his lap.
His left arm circled her waist, hugging her closer to his chest and his right rubbed her back in soothing circles. “I have a confession to make.”
Sonya raised her eyebrows and searched his eyes as dread coiled in her belly ready to strike.
“I did more than see the video of you. I saw you before that. Before I went to work for Ian.”
What he said was so unexpected, she snorted and her hand flew to her face in surprise. She never snorted.
He smirked. “It’s true. Not long after I left the military, Ian asked me to work for him as private security. I was already contracted so had to turn him down, but he told me about his brilliant protege that was goin’ to revolutionize the nano industry.”
Sonya could only blink at him owlishly.
“As you now know, I had a thing
for Ian. We had met when I was still in the Marines. He was doin’ contract work on base. He kept in touch. I was a little jealous of you, when he told me about you later.”
“Me?”
“Mhm. I decided to check you out. You know, to make sure you were legit and all,” he said, and softened the sting of his words with a chuckle. “I went to see you lecture at a University on the use of nanobots in cellular reconstruction.”
“Did it put you to sleep?” she asked with a laugh.
“No, but I didn’t understand about ninety percent of what you said. That didn’t matter, though. Watchin’ you, seein’ you talk so passionately in your element—I was hooked. Whenever our assignments would allow, I would try to catch a lecture or seminar. You were just so—I don’t know brilliant? Put together? Poised? Beautiful? All those things together. There was no word. Still isn’t.”
Sonya wanted to believe him with every fiber of her being. To be seen and loved as she was, wasn’t something she ever thought she would have for herself. “Did Ian know you did that?”
Cole shook with quiet mirth. “Baby, no one knew. I would never hear the end of it from my team if they knew I was following a woman around the world.” His smile dipped and faded. “When Ian called me and told me someone had tried to kill you… that you were in a coma…” He stopped rubbing her back and used both arms to squeeze her tight. “It was hard for me to deal with.”
“But you dated Ian? After the accident?” she said, needing some clarity.
He pressed his lips to her temple and nodded. “I was raised in a poly family. Do you know what that is?”
