by Alec, Joyce
“Do rest for now,” Lady Millington said gently, rising to her feet. “And try to leave such anxious thoughts behind. I am quite sure that nothing more untoward will occur during the rest of the house party.”
* * *
Thankfully, dinner was a lovely, if not a slightly quieter affair, and Emily managed to remain entirely silent throughout. She did not miss Miss Martin’s anxious looks, however, nor did she miss Lord Pallson’s glances. Those, however, she could not return, finding herself a little too aware of how he was making her feel. Her own worries were becoming a little less, however, as the familiarity of sitting in the same company began to comfort her.
When the ladies rose to leave the gentlemen to their port, however, she found that Miss Martin immediately took her arm and came to sit with her. The comfort that brought was a balm to her worried mind, and she found herself smiling into the girl’s anxious face in an attempt to bring her some relief from her worry.
“I am quite all right, Miss Martin,” she said softly, even though the girl had not said a word. “You need not look so worried.”
“Please, might you call me Helen?” Miss Martin asked, pressing Emily’s hand. “Truly, I do feel as though we have become very good friends these last few days. Did I tell you that Lord Pallson himself even commented on just how much improved my conversation has been of late?” Her smile quivered. “I am quite sure that I have you to thank for that, Miss Thorpe.”
Emily’s smile spread, taking in a deep breath and letting it out slowly as the last of her nervousness faded away. Lady Millington had been quite correct. She ought to accept that Lord Franks’ story of creditors and debt was true and that she had nothing to fear. There was very little chance that someone had followed her here, or even knew that she was here in the first place. She was quite safe. It had all just been an unfortunate accident.
“I should be glad to call you Helen,” Emily replied happily. “And I am very glad to hear that Lord Pallson has noted your improvement. It is truly wonderful to hear, and I am quite sure that you shall soon be whirling through society with confidence, elegance, and poise.”
Helen smiled, her expression one of relief and contentment. “I do hope so, Miss Thorpe.”
“Emily, please.”
Helen made to say more, only for the sound of lively piano music to break into their conversation. After only a few bars of the jaunty tune, Lord Winchester appeared and, inclining his head, greeted them both and then asked, most politely, whether Helen would be willing to dance with him. Emily did not miss the slight sparkle in Lord Winchester’s eyes, nor the blush that immediately appeared on her charge’s cheeks. She smiled happily as they both rose to dance, sighing with a newfound sense of contentment as her fears ran to the dark shadows.
“Do you not care to dance, Miss Thorpe?”
A little surprised, Emily turned to see Lord Pallson standing by her side, not looking at her but rather out at the dancers. Her heart paused for a moment, only to slam back hard into her chest, making her catch her breath.
“I do hope your arm does not pain you,” Lord Pallson commented, looking a little confused. “Are you quite sure you should not be resting, Miss Thorpe?”
Emily flushed scarlet. “I am quite well, Lord Pallson. I thank you.” She could not exactly explain that her swift intake of breath had been due to his presence and his presence alone. “My arm is doing very well, I assure you. It has been dressed and barely pains me.”
Lord Pallson nodded, finally turning to look at her. “Might you care for a short stroll, Miss Thorpe?”
Her pulse began to race. “A stroll, Lord Pallson? It is rather dark, is it not?”
His voice was a little husky, barely reaching her ears. “I thought, mayhap, you might wish to visit the library to ensure you have a good novel to dip into before you retire.”
Her throat became clogged with sand, as heat seared her spine, racing up into her face.
“I--I apologize,” Lord Pallson stammered, sounding a little embarrassed. “It was… I mean, I only wish to ensure that you are quite recovered from your accident and that you—”
“Certainly, Lord Pallson,” Emily found herself saying, slowly rising from her seat and being quite aware that, whilst she was not about to behave within the realms of propriety, she was not going to be easily missed by the other guests. That was, perhaps, one of the blessings of being a companion. “I was considering retiring early.”
Lord Pallson looked both relieved and embarrassed, his eyes darting from here to there before he offered her his arm, leading her to the secret door, which was to lead them both to the library.
Emily felt her breathing quicken as they walked into the dark passage. The sounds of music and dancing and laughter all began to fade as the door closed behind them, and Emily was grateful for the small candle that sat waiting for them just inside. It was cold, and she could not help but shiver.
“You are not afraid of the dark, I hope,” Lord Pallson muttered, his voice bouncing off the walls. “Or spiders, for I am afraid there will be quite a few of them around these parts.”
Despite herself, she shuddered a little and was forced to press close to Lord Pallson as they walked along the narrow passageway. “A little frightened, perhaps,” she admitted, as Lord Pallson chuckled. “Although after what has occurred of late, one would think that I ought to have a little more courage.”
Lord Pallson pushed the door to the library open and allowed her to step into the relative warmth first. “I am just very glad that you are all right, Miss Thorpe. Lord Franks was a fool for not staying with you and bringing you back to safety. I cannot imagine what made him behave in such a reckless manner!”
“Fear,” Emily sighed, rubbing her hands up and down her arms in an attempt to bring some warmth back into her limbs. “Although it is kind of you to be so offended on my account.”
Lord Pallson stepped nearer, and Emily felt her stomach begin to swirl with nervous anticipation. “It was not the behavior of a gentleman, Miss Thorpe. Then again, I will admit that my behavior has not been particularly appropriate either.”
“But a little more welcome,” Emily replied, before she could prevent herself. All of a sudden, she felt the urge to be wrapped in his arms, to let him bring her strength and courage, to feel that reassurance that she knew he could bring. Blushing, she looked away, taking a few more steps towards the fire and concentrating her gaze on the flickering flames that felt as though they were burning in her heart with the same intensity.
Lord Pallson let out a long breath that seemed to rattle across the room. His footsteps moved towards her, but still, Emily could not look at him. For the first time, she felt the first strains of guilt catch at her soul, realizing that despite the fact that she was doing what she had to in order to protect herself, she did not like the pretense with Lord Pallson and Helen.
“Miss Thorpe, I must confess something,” Lord Pallson murmured, now only a few steps away. “I have been completely captivated by you ever since I set eyes on you.”
Emily felt her throat constrict, one hand pressed against her stomach as swirls of excitement began to pull through her.
“I have never been in such a situation before,” Lord Pallson continued softly. “I do not know what it is that I feel, nor what it is that I intend to do with such feelings, but I must tell you the truth of it, Miss Thorpe. I know that there is so much more of you to know, and I long to know you better—truly. I tell you this simply because I do not feel as though I can keep it to myself, not when my heart and mind are so full of you. When I saw you yesterday, I could hardly bring myself to step away from you, and yet I knew I had to do so. Ever since then, I have thought of nothing but you.”
Emily closed her eyes tightly, feeling tears press against them.
“I do not mean to overwhelm you with this, Miss Thorpe, but I had to tell you the truth about my feelings,” Lord Pallson finished, his voice a little hoarse. “Do excuse me if I have spoken out of turn.”
For a long moment, she could not speak, could not move. Her feet were fastened to the floor, her entire body aflame with the heat of the fire, and from what she felt. Her heart clenched with both joy and pain, knowing that Lord Pallson did not know the truth of who she was. If she went to him now, then she would be continuing with the deception. She was not the quiet, refrained character of Miss Thorpe, but rather she was the bright, conversational Lady Emily Dove, a character she could not reveal at this very moment. If she reached for him now, if she told him the truth then he might turn from her altogether. He might reject her, might turn from her, might be angry with what she had done. But, then again, he might understand why she had been forced into this role, and he might be able to assist her.
Pressing her hands against her temples, she let the silence settle for a moment.
“You know full well that I am not immune to you, Lord Pallson,” she whispered, not able to look at him. “I think you have proven as much already.”
Lord Pallson put one hand on her shoulder, gently turning her towards him, but still, she could not raise her eyes.
“I do not know what to say, Lord Pallson,” she breathed, her hands falling to her sides. “You have quite astonished me.”
He put his hand on her other shoulder, before letting his hands run down her arms until they caught her fingers. “My dear Miss Thorpe, I have spoken out of turn yet again.” Shaking his head, he let out a ragged breath. “Whenever we meet, it appears that I am continually apologizing, but I will not take back a single thing I have said. I mean every word, and I am glad, proud even, that I have told you all that has been in my heart. It is rather sudden, I know, but I have never felt such affection before.”
Slowly, she raised her eyes to his, seeing the affection burning in his eyes. His fingers twined with hers, his breath brushing lightly across her cheek. She could look nowhere but into his face, taking in everything she saw, everything she felt, and letting it settle into her heart.
“Lord Pallson,” she replied quietly, her heart soaring as he lifted his hand and brushed her cheek. “I will not pretend that I feel nothing, but there is more that I need to share with you. Things of great importance. I—”
His lips were on hers before she could finish her sentence, his hand tight around her waist. She was pressed hard against him, her hands around his neck as her feelings exploded all through her. She had not told him the truth, had not told him the truth of her identity, but yet it felt as though none of that mattered. Not when Lord Pallson held her so tightly and kissed her so tenderly. Not when she felt her heart fill with affection, fill with the first few flutterings of love. She could not step back from him, could not break what was growing between them, not even if she wanted to.
At this one moment, all that mattered was him.
6
“Good evening, Lord Pallson.”
Lord Franks half stumbled as he walked towards Joseph, his breathing a little quickened and one hand attempting to smooth down his hair, which was entirely out of place. It was clear the man was still in a state of shock for whatever reason.
Joseph greeted Lord Franks with a small smile, not truly ready to forgive the gentleman for what he had done to Miss Thorpe. But, then again, he had kissed Miss Thorpe again last evening, and since then, he had found a little more brightness to his day. It was more difficult to continue being so angry and frustrated with Lord Franks when he had been happier than ever.
“Good evening, Lord Franks,” he muttered, his eyes flickering around the room, as he looked at all the other guests who were busy talking together, playing cards or, from the looks of one or two of them, sleeping soundly in their chairs. “No one has made any other attempts on your life, I hope?”
Lord Franks shook his head. “No, thank heavens, although I must return to town and pay my creditors just as soon as I can.”
“And do you have sufficient funds to do so?” Joseph enquired, although he was not particularly interested. “You must owe them a good deal of money if they are chasing after you all the way out to the Brighton estate!”
Lord Franks sighed heavily. “I have been a little…unscrupulous in my dealings of late. I will do what I can to amend such matters and then perhaps take a long time back at my estate. I should expect a year or so should do it.”
Joseph resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “It sounds like a very wise idea, Lord Franks. Now—”
“Is Miss Thorpe quite all right?”
Joseph frowned, turning to see if he could find Miss Thorpe amongst the crowd of guests. “I am sure she is very well,” he murmured, quickly looking here to there in order to find her. “When last I spoke to her, her arm appeared to be very much improved.”
Lord Franks replied, but Joseph did not listen to a word that came from his mouth. Instead, all he could hear was his pulse growing ever quicker, his heart slamming wildly into his chest as he realized he could not see Miss Thorpe anywhere. She had been at dinner, yes, but last he had seen, she had been walking with the other ladies into the drawing room. Had she retired early? Was she feeling unwell? Or was she desperate to remove herself entirely from his presence, perhaps a little overwhelmed with what they had shared together.
Lady Millington caught his eye and, holding it for a moment, let her brows furrow into a frown. Glancing around her, he saw her start suddenly, as though quite unaware that Miss Thorpe had disappeared. Ignoring the fact that Lord Franks was still talking to him, he stepped away from him without a word and made his way to Lady Millington’s side.
“You are wondering where Miss Thorpe has gone?” Lady Millington murmured, rising to her feet to stand by his side. “I confess I did not see her leave, and she did not tell me she was departing early.”
His stomach tightened, although he could not quite explain the reason for it. “Perhaps she is weary.”
“Or, mayhap…” Lady Millington trailed off, her expression growing somewhat tense. She glanced at him, her eyes dark, and for a moment, Joseph wondered if there was more she had not told him.
Lady Millington bit her lip. “We must find her, Lord Pallson.”
“Find her?” he repeated, his mind scrambling to understand her meaning. “Surely she has just retired early, Lady Millington. There is no need for alarm, surely?”
As much as he attempted to remain calm, there was something about the way Lady Millington looked at him that told him there was more to this situation than he first thought. Miss Thorpe could not be in any sort of danger, surely?
“I am quite sure that she has, yes,” Lady Millington replied, with a thin, tight-lipped smile. “Might you walk with me, Lord Pallson, to ensure that she has done so?”
Joseph nodded and extended his arm. “But of course, Lady Millington. Should we bring your maid?”
Lady Millington shook her head and grasped his arm tightly, betraying her anxiety. “No, indeed, Lord Pallson. There is no need. I think I am old enough not to require such considerations.” Her smile did not reach her eyes, and her tight grip sent flickers of fear into his heart.
“Then of course,” he murmured, walking from the room with Lady Millington on his arm and realizing that not another single guest cared about their exit in any way.
Their footsteps echoed along the hallway as they walked, lit with single candles here and there. It was not the gloom nor the dark shadows that caught his breath, but rather the swiftness of Lady Millington’s footsteps and the way her breath was quickening with every step. There was more to this than he was aware, he was quite certain, for the way that she was glancing all along the darkening hallway brought a sense of urgency to his heart.
“There is something you have not told me about Miss Thorpe, Lady Millington,” he muttered, as they climbed the staircase towards Miss Thorpe’s bedchamber. “What is it?”
Lady Millington did not answer.
“You must tell me,” he persisted, refusing to accept her silence. “Is she in some sort of danger, my lady? Was the shot meant for h
er, instead of simply an accident involving Lord Franks?”
“Please, Lord Pallson,” Lady Millington begged, her voice hoarse as they reached the hallway. “Now is not the time for your insistent questioning. I must simply ensure Miss Thorpe is resting; that is all.”
Joseph, who did not understand this, was forced to wait in silence as Lady Millington rapped sharply on Miss Thorpe’s door.
“Miss Thorpe?” she called, her voice echoing down the hallway. “Emily? Are you within?”
There was no response.
“Might the door be unlocked?” Joseph asked, as Lady Millington reached for it. “She may be—”
He was interrupted by the sound of Miss Thorpe’s voice coming towards them.
“Lady Millington? Lord Pallson?”
Lady Millington turned at once, her face pale. “Oh, Miss Thorpe! I have been terribly worried! Where have you been?”
Miss Thorpe’s eyes traveled toward Joseph for a moment, a hint of red flushing her cheeks. “I was simply in the library, perusing the shelves for a new novel. I have found it and thought to retire early. After all, Miss Martin does not require me at this present moment, unless…” She trailed off and glanced at Joseph again. “Unless I have been failing in my duties.”
Awash with relief – although he did not know what it was he had been fearful of – Joseph smiled at her at once, whilst Lady Millington caught Miss Thorpe’s hands. “No, indeed, Miss Thorpe. Lady Millington was a little worried, that is all.”
He did not miss how Miss Thorpe shot a warning glance towards Lady Millington, nor how the lady pressed Miss Thorpe’s hands yet again.
“As you can see, I am quite all right,” Miss Thorpe said softly. “There was no need for concern.”
Lady Millington sighed heavily. “I suppose that, after the recent incident, I have just been a little overly concerned.”
