As we neared the turn down Jack’s street, I peered into Asher’s green eyes. Their aqua perfection filled me with warmth. “I should have taken you out for breakfast.”
Reaching the end of the cul-de-sac, Asher slowed. He peered at me as he parked. As he dipped his nose toward mine, my chest spiraled with electric positive source.
Desperation to close the inch gap between us and run my hands through his hair shot through me. But Daniel said no kissing in the car, and his mom said no kissing until a second date. Right now we were working on a school project.
“Do you think it’s true?” he asked.
“What?” I whispered.
He leaned back in the seat. “That saying about good things coming if we wait?”
I sighed, somewhat annoyed. “Probably.”
The corners of his eyes crinkled, and I grinned.
“You’re going to love kissing me,” I said. The butterflies in my stomach swarmed like they’d been caffeinated. Before he could retort, I let myself out, then scurried quickly toward the steep driveway.
“Tara, wait!” Asher called.
A van was parked under the basketball net. A tall muscular teen boy, dressed in Sunday best, with flaming red hair to rival Jack’s, pushed a strawberry blonde young woman in a wheelchair toward the sidewalk.
I stopped as Asher caught up to me. A feeling of horror dropped into the pit of my stomach. Oh, no.
“That’s Emma,” he whispered quickly to me. “Let’s go.” He grabbed my elbow.
I nodded, quickly retreating.
“Hey! What are you doing here?” The teen with Emma shouted at Asher. “You should be in jail.”
“Asher?” Emma wheeled herself quickly forward. Strawberry blonde hair framed her face in waves. Her skin was flawless. Her hazel eyes were wide, looking at Asher intently. Coming closer, she brought with her a strong wave of lavender lotion, a scent that reminded me of Mom. A scent that reminded Asher of the accident.
Of Emma not being in the car.
Anger creased Emma’s forehead. “Is that you?”
“Bad timing. We’re going.” Quickly, I linked my arm through Asher’s and pulled him back toward the car. But Asher’s feet were as planted to the ground as a tree trunk, and he didn’t move.
Emma shook her head quickly. “They said you would die, yet here you walk. Changing the way you look doesn’t change a rotten heart. You know that, right?”
Her bitterness sent a seed of desperation through me. I could hardly imagine how Asher felt. What a witch.
A strange sound gurgled inside Asher, like a dog crying for his master.
“Let’s go.” I prodded him toward the driver’s side of the car.
His body trembled. He had this shell shocked expression on his face, and I opened the door for him.
“Asher, Asher, let’s go.”
He slipped onto his seat. I looked at Emma as I passed. “Even if he got you drunk, he didn’t mean to. You don’t need to be so hostile.”
“And you were there, were you?” she asked.
“Just because he walks and you don’t, doesn’t mean he’s the bad guy.”
“He’s a liar,” the tall teen said.
Negative source brewed inside me. I kind of wanted to direct it at them. “He doesn’t lie. Sure, he might hide the truth, but I’m pretty certain he’s not the only one.” I threw that last comment at Emma, then got in.
Familiar mint washed over me. Asher gripped the steering wheel. His eyes were rimmed red, and he whispered something.
I leaned closer to hear what he was saying.
“It’s not real,” he muttered. “I’m in my car.” He took a controlled breath. In, out. Then again. In, out. Shakier each time.
“Asher…”
This was how he’d acted a week ago, having a flashback. Had his encounter with Emma triggered another?
Not knowing what to do, I placed a hand on his leg and patted it. I really wanted to share my positive source with him.
“Why isn’t she in the car?” Asher looked at me with wide, almost unseeing eyes.
“I’m in the car,” I said.
He calmed, then his gaze focused on me. Groaning, he shook his head. “I’m sorry.” He closed his eyes. “I need to sleep.”
“What?” I asked.
“I need to sleep,” he repeated, without opening his eyes.
Someone tapped on his window. It was Jack, dressed in a white button up and a tie hanging loose around his neck. He waved then got into the back of the car. “Well. I didn’t believe Price at first. What are you two doing here?” He sat in the middle, then leaned forward, peering intently at Asher.
“Our school project. We were on our way to my old house,” I said. “Sorry. We were just stopping to say hello.”
He pursed his lips to the side. “Hello.”
“Asher needs somewhere to rest. He’s not feeling well.”
Jack nodded. “How about at Lydia’s until my aunt and uncle leave?”
Nodding, I looked down the street to Lydia’s corner lot. A row of flowers bordered the sidewalk and tall willows blocked the house from view. I gave Asher a little shake, and he opened his eyes. “It’s the last one on the left.” I pointed for Asher. “What do you think?”
Asher turned the key in the ignition, then drove forward. Once parked in the driveway, he leaned his chair backwards, closed his eyes, and grew incredibly still. “I just need a minute,” he whispered.
Sighing, I looked in the back at Jack, then toward Lydia’s house. Asher would probably appreciate being left alone for a minute. Jack slid out. Picking up my purse, I followed his lead. Outside, the cool October breeze brushed against my skin. It was a perfect temperature day for a day that was not going as perfectly as I’d hoped.
When we knocked on the door, no one answered.
“She’s probably still at her church,” Jack said, checking the time on his phone, then sat down on the porch swing.
I sat down by him, setting my purse in the ground. “Emma really hates Asher now, doesn’t she?”
“Her whole family does.” Jack scratched his brow. “Most if not all of his former friends do, also. Plus the entirety of the senior class at his old high school. He paralyzed Emma her senior year of high school. She already had several offers for basketball scholarships. She was the girl everyone loved. When he gave her that drink, it ruined so many dreams.”
“One drink made her that drunk?” I pushed back on the swing. “Kind of seems fishy. You really think it’s his fault?” I looked toward Asher’s lean figure resting in the car.
“He believes it’s his fault, whether it was an accident or not. The detective and psychologist who interviewed did not.” Jack shrugged. “Whatever his wrong was, I forgave him a while ago. It’s actually been really incredible seeing the new person he’s become, minus...minus the trauma. It’s given me a lot of hope that I can be different. I can change the weaknesses and imperfections that haunt me.”
I turned quickly toward him. “What do you mean by that?”
“I used to be so bitter. Self destructive, in fact.”Jack paused. “It’s a wonder Lydia stuck with me. Emma and Asher’s accident blindsided me, and then something else happened that just about ruined me. Praying and asking God for help, for forgiveness, I finally felt relief. It didn’t happen all at once, but when it did, this huge weight came off my shoulders.” He hesitated, leaning forward. “I learned that by holding onto hate, discouragement, bitterness, I was adding to my suffering. When I chose to forgive,” Jack’s face lit up, “it was amazing the difference in the way I felt. Forgiving Asher played a huge role in me being able to forgive myself.”
I frowned, nodding to myself. I’d held onto my resentment toward Mom and Daniel for the last six years. What happiness had it brought me? None. In fact, it had spoiled everything for everyone. No wonder Holden kept telling me to give Daniel a chance.
“I need to forgive Mom and Daniel,” I said softly.
Jack
toyed with the chain of the swing. Sadness crept into his eyes.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
He shook his head, then stopped, swallowing. “Um. Are we going to be friends again?”
“I thought we already were,” I said.
He grinned crookedly. “Asher’s not gonna steal all your attention?” His shoulders slouched.
“Jack, I don’t want to lose your friendship a second time.” I set a hand on his back and rubbed it. “It’s like you said on Friday. I love you like a brother. It’s been really nice finding out it’s still easy between us. I’m sorry for how resistant I was at first.”
He grinned. “If it weren’t for the math tutor relationship, I’d have given up.”
“I’m glad you didn’t.”
Sadness still lurked his eyes. Maybe it had something to do with sitting on Lydia’s porch. “What happened between you and Lydia?”
“Ah, the question.” He sank into the swing, folded his hands together, and rested them in his lap. He was silent, pondering. His sadness deepened.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“Just a second.” Jack pulled out his smartphone and opened his contacts, bringing up Lydia’s information. He texted her, not trying to hide the message from me. Can I tell Tara about what happened between us?
He smiled for a brief second, not quite meeting my gaze.
The telltale ellipses of Lydia returning a message appeared.
I’m okay with her knowing.
Jack swallowed, returning the phone to his pocket. He sighed. “One of my parents’ rules for all six of us was that we couldn’t date before sixteen.”
“That was one of my Mom’s only rules,” I said. “Oh.” He and Lydia were dating in middle school.
A dimple formed on one of his cheeks.
“You didn’t follow that rule very well.”
“Or the premarital sex one.” Jack sobered.
I leaned back beside him, not really shocked. They’d been affectionate with each other in public. “Ah.” I waited patiently in his silence.
“Though we did wait for that until sixteen. I guess I thought that since she was the one I was going to marry, why wait?”
Asher’s question earlier, about whether the saying about good things coming to you if you waited, flashed through my mind.
“Lydia got pregnant.” Jack choked up.
That did shock me. My heart pounded as he struggled to keep his emotion. Thinking back to last year, I couldn’t remember Lydia looking any bigger. He’d never talked about a baby.
“She miscarried about a month after Asher and Emma had their accident.”
“Oh, Jack,” I whispered.
Jack sniffed, clenching his jaw. “She’d tried to hide being pregnant from me. And then she tried to hide the miscarriage.” He shook his head. “I thought she was dying. She almost did.”
I wasn’t sure what to say. Jack had lost a baby. Dark gloomy source floated like smoke inside me. I rubbed his back. Reaching into my purse, I pulled out one of Daniel’s chocolate chip cookies, filled it with positive source, and handed it to him.“I’m sorry Jack.”
He smiled sadly, taking it. He took a bite. “These are really good.” Carefully, as if he savored every bite, Jack ate the rest of it. Once he finished, he said, “It changed us both in different ways. In the end, we realized we had different goals for life. I want a big family someday. She...she wants a career. Maybe one kid when she’s in her thirties. That’s just one example.”
“Oh, Jack.” Telling him ‘maybe it was for the best’ seemed like the worst thing to say.
He shrugged. “So that’s what happened.” He rubbed his eyes.
I nodded. “Thanks for sharing.” I rested my head on his shoulder, and he wrapped an arm around me.
“It’s all right now. It helped us realize we ultimately have different goals. Brought me back to going to church with my parents.”
“You weren’t going?”
“No. I didn’t like feeling guilty every time I went.”
“Hmm.” I fiddled with my necklace from Dad.
Jack ran his fingers through my hair.
Leaves crunched as someone approached. Asher walked up the sidewalk, then came to a stop. A jealous spark lit his eyes as his gaze settled on Jack.
I forced myself not to spring up, as if I’d been caught flirting with someone. But I knew if I was going to head into a relationship with Asher, I needed to define the one I had with Jack to Asher. “Asher, Jack’s like my brother.”
Asher folded his arms, looking between us. “That’s what the jealous best friend always wants the girl to think.”
“Ugh.” Jack quickly extracted himself from me. “Not interested in kissing her. In fact, I helped set the two of you up. Though I am up for hugs.” He stood, opening his arms wide. “Yours included.”
“Don’t touch me,” Asher said and stared at me.
“Really, Asher.” Being more than just friends with Asher was only going to work if he accepted Jack. “He’s no more a threat to you than Holden would be.”
“Well. Honestly, I’m kind of terrified of meeting Holden.” Asher shuddered.
I smiled, then rising to my feet, I stepped up to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Doing better?” I whispered.
He wrapped his arm around me. “Getting there. Are you up for seeing your childhood home?”
“Yeah. I think I am.”
Asher hesitated, looking at Jack. When he turned back toward me, something softened in his expression, and he spoke to Jack. “Do you want to come with?”
Warmth exploded inside me at his show of acceptance.
Jack’s brows rose, he looked toward his house at the end of the street, which he could have easily walked to, then smiled crookedly. “Sure.”
We all got in the car, Jack sliding into the back seat. As Asher backed out of the driveway, Jack’s phone signalled an incoming message.
I glanced at him as worry creased his face.
“Everything all right?” I asked.
“It’s Lydia. She was wondering…” Without finishing, Jack tapped a response back to her.
I glanced at Asher.
“You two officially aren’t together anymore, right?” Asher asked, coming to a stop at a stop sign.
“Right.” Jack looked up from his message, then growled. “Seriously, you don’t have to worry about me having romantic intentions with Tara.”
Asher turned right, going the wrong direction too late for me to correct him.
“Tara used to be like my twin. We did everything together. I just want my sister back.”
His declaration slammed a heavy weight against my chest. Memories of the way we’d been as kids swarmed back and the hurt when Mom wouldn’t let me see him again flamed in my stomach.
I’d buried my loneliness without him so deep I’d forgotten how much I’d missed Jack.
“Asher, you and Lydia--” He cut off as his phone signaled another message. “She doesn’t want to date me. Why does she care?” He growled, texting her again.
I gnawed on my lip, watching Asher pass Benny’s old driveway.
Sounded like Lydia might be thinking something was going on between Jack and me, too.
Asher leaned toward me. “Did I go the wrong way?”
I nodded, twisting to look back at Jack. Maybe he needed to go on a date with a different girl. Or maybe a better idea was to have a group date or group gang out. But what girl did I know who would work for Jack? Maybe Isabel? She was fun when pulled away from her fantasy novels.
“Jack, are you interested in doing something with other girls at all?” I asked. When Asher came to a stop, I tapped his shoulder and pointed for him to go right, and he pulled forward.
“Why, are you going to set something up?” Jack ssid as his phone buzzed
As the next street came up, I signaled Asher to turn left, sending him down roads that made a loop. “What about Isabel?” I leaned into m
y seat to look at Jack again. “I think you would have a lot of fun. She has a funny personality hiding behind her quietness.”
“And you know that how?” Jack picked up his phone and flipped it around, ignoring Lydia’s next message.
I took it to mean he was at the minimum intrigued by Isabel. “We take science together.”
“If you all wanted to hang out, I wouldn’t say no if she said yes.” Jack returned to his messages.
Asher looked sideways at me. “You going to ask her?”
“I’ll feel her out.” I shrugged. “I bet she’d be up for a group activity? Would you be?” I looked closely at Asher to see his reaction, knowing how anxious he’d been about the outing with David and the others.
“If it wasn’t something big.” He turned right. “Am I going the right way now?”
I nodded. A strange feeling settled on me as he drove forward. A conglomerate of hundreds of memories driving down this street.
I was coming home.
22. Paradise
Paradise—a place of happiness and innocence—it was the perfect word to describe my childhood home.
It was as far back in the neighborhood as we could go—difficult to find. I’d hated Mom for selling it.
Asher parked on the road between the opposing ponds. Restless to see the place I’d spent childhood, I didn’t wait for Asher to get my door. I jumped out.
With the changing leaves of the trees, the hill in front of me was bathed in yellow, red, and oranges. Three drives started at the end of the cul-de-sac and forked up the hill, disappearing into the woods. Only one of the homes could be seen from the street.
I took a deep breath of autumn. I’m home.
Seeing the for sale sign, I walked over and pulled the information sheet about the house out of the cylinder connected to it.
The Changeling's Source (Evedon Legacy Book 1) Page 24
