“Always loved you, Penny,” he said, and pressed a kiss on my forehead. “I guess this world just ain’t made for us though.”
I listened as my front door clicked closed behind him and I cried into my hands, wondering what was wrong with me and if I’d ever feel normal again.
~ 21 ~
Penny
The clubhouse was filled with people I knew—so-called family and friends and other people that my father trusted. I was surrounded by people and yet I felt completely alone. It was good though, this feeling of loneliness, it made me even more determined than ever to gain control of my life.
And not the life I’d previously had.
The life my daddy had created for me.
I couldn’t and wouldn’t live like that anymore. It felt like I’d been living underwater my whole life, the world muffled and drowned out to only whatever my daddy let in. But no more.
I had to get out, to break free, and become the Penny I wanted to be—the Penny that I could be. The nurse, the woman who liked black and white movies, who loved to dance and drink, who got off on being spanked so hard her ass hurt to sit down on afterwards. The Highwayman had been right: life was too fucking short to waste even a moment of it, and yet I’d wasted years.
I’d never cared for my father’s approval, and I didn’t need his money; it had been fear and not knowing what I’d do or where I’d go that had kept me there. I hadn’t known any better than the way I’d been living. But I did now.
Ruby and Violet, one of the sweetbutts from the club, were sipping mimosas by the old-school jukebox my father had bought me for my fifteenth birthday. I made my way over to them, a bottle of beer in my hand. Violet was my dance buddy when I went out. She was a nice enough girl but she was loyal to my daddy, not me—though we both pretended it was a friendship between us.
“Hey girls,” I said, giving a flick of my hair over my shoulder.
Ruby and Violet turned to look at me, Ruby’s eyes appraising me from head to toe. “You’re looking better,” she replied with a smile. “Don’t you think, Violet?”
Violet nodded. “Yeah, and that funky smell has gone now too. What was that?”
I shrugged ignorantly. Weed, leather, and whatever soap the Highwayman had used on me—that was what it had probably been. “No idea, I’m just glad to be back here and clean,” I joked.
Fake it till you make it, I thought to myself.
I didn’t trust any of those women, I’d realized after Scratch had left my apartment earlier. I didn’t trust the women, the men, or anyone who belonged to the club. How could I when they were all loyal to my daddy?
“These are nice,” Violet said, pointing to the leather cuffs I wore around each wrist. “Kinky,” she giggled.
I smiled. “Thanks.”
Ruby was still staring at me thoughtfully. “You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’ve got that just fucked-look about you, Penny.” She laughed and Violet joined in. “But you still have your V card, right?”
“Only one of us here that does!” Violet laughed, and Ruby and I joined in. “Think I lost mine when I was scraping fifteen in the back of my neighbor’s car.”
“Yeah, I still have it,” I replied dryly.
I was twenty and still a virgin. It was ridiculous. I hadn’t really thought about how ridiculous it was until tonight. I was a grown woman and I was still letting my daddy control every part of my life, from my education, to my job, to my body.
But not anymore.
“That’s good. Can you imagine what your daddy would do if he found out you weren’t?” Ruby laughed, but there was no humor in it. “You know he’s been keeping that thing safe since the day your mom walked out on him.” She laughed and I joined in. “He has big plans for that pussy of yours, so keep it safe.”
I took a long swig of my beer, nerves fluttering in my stomach as Ruby and I stared at one another, her crude words lingering between us.
The door to my daddy’s office opened and one of the sweetbutts stepped out and headed across the clubhouse. Daddy stepped out a moment later, a cigar tucked between his lips as he looked around the room until his eyes found mine. His face remained impassive but I could already see the disapproval burning from him.
I’d managed to piece together an outfit that I wanted to wear—tight black leather pants, a red cut off t-shirt that barely covered my breasts, and a pair of heels I’d borrowed from my neighbor. I’d washed and dried my hair, giving it big bouncy waves, and smeared red lipstick on to match my top. Not to mention the leather cuffs around my wrists to hide the abrasions from the metal cuffs. I looked like every biker’s wet dream, and he hated it.
Yet instead of him yelling at me and getting one of his men to drag me out of there, he smiled darkly, sending fear up and down my arms as he crossed the room toward me. Daddy stopped in front of me, his gaze empty as he looked me up and down.
“Daddy,” I said in acknowledgment.
He swallowed, his gaze landing on my red lips as he smiled. “Looking real grown up tonight, Penny,” he said, his thick voice snaking around me. “Where’d my little girl go?” He chuckled.
“I’m twenty, Daddy. I’m not a little girl no more.” I forced my voice not to shake as he slung an arm around my shoulders.
“Is that so?” He chuckled again. “Y’all grown up then? You a biker slut too now, Penny? Is that it?”
I kept my mouth shut, unsure of what to say. It wasn’t going like I’d expected it to. He wasn’t reacting the way I’d expected him to.
He swung me round so we faced the club and his brothers, and I saw Ruby and Violet move away from me like I was a leper.
“Brothers,” Daddy called, “I need your attention, so quiet the fuck down.”
The music cutting out, and barring my raging heart, the room fell silent.
“My little girl, Penny, is all grown up.” He stepped away from me, using one hand to gesture up and down my body. My eyes moved over the men, to Solomon and Cheeto, Lenny and Denzil, all their eyes looking me over like I was meat. Scratch was nowhere to be found, and right then he was the only one I wanted to see. Just one friendly face to give me some strength.
“Wouldn’t you say that she’s a fine piece of ass, brothers?” Daddy asked, making my cheeks flame red. The room remained silent and he laughed. “Don’t be shy, I’m not going to cut your dicks off and feed them to you. She’s full grown now, twenty, almost twenty-one, and with a beautiful rack just like her momma used to have.” He grabbed my hand and spun me, making me stumble in the heels. “Ain’t she a prize fucking catch, brothers?”
The room erupted in whoops and cheers and humiliation burned through me. Tears stung my eyes, but just like when the Highwaymen had taken me, I refused to let the tears fall.
“And the best part of this is, my girl’s still a virgin. I bet you boys would like to pound that right the fuck out of her, am I right?”
The room cheered again, and I glanced over to see Ruby sneering at me as she sipped her mimosa. I tugged my hand free of my daddy’s and glared up at him.
“Stop it!” I bit out, disgusted and shocked that he was parading me like that. “Don’t do this, Daddy.”
“Stop it? I’m proud of you, baby. You’re my daughter, full grown, beautiful, intelligent, and not a fucking slut like the rest of these bitches. You saved yourself just like a good girl should. Didn’t waste that precious part of you on a piece of shit, but saved it for your old man to give away—to choose the right man for you, just like I told you to.” He puffed on his cigar and stared at me, and I knew then that he knew.
He knew that I’d almost given it up to Scratch.
“Where is he?” I asked, fear giving way to anger.
My daddy smirked. “Don’t worry yourself over it, Penny. You’ve got bigger worries.”
My daddy took a step forward, away from me, addressing the club, his brothers. “I’ve been saving my girl here for someone special, and I’m ready to cash it in now—cash h
er in. The man that brings me the head of whoever took her gets her and her sweet pussy.”
Shock and horror roiled through me.
My gaze scanned the room, falling on the greedy eyes of the men I’d grown up with, men I considered my family, men old enough to be my father. Some old enough to be my grandfather. And now they were all looking at me like I was a piece of meat for the taking.
“I have to warn you though.” He glanced over his shoulder at me before looking back at the club again. “I don’t want to lie to any of you good men. I’m not wholly certain she’s actually a virgin anymore. Ain’t that right, sweetheart? Caught her with her pants down and a dick in her hand earlier today, but she promised me she was still pure, so what’s a father to do right,” he laughed.
I couldn’t do it anymore.
I couldn’t wait.
I couldn’t even try and talk sense into him.
He was a monster and I was finally seeing that there was no curing that type of monstrosity.
“I’m leaving,” I snapped as I pushed past my daddy.
No one tried to stop me leaving, though every hand that slid over my ass or down my arms as I moved through the crowd of men made me flinch in case someone tried to stop me. As I got to the door of the clubhouse, I realized that my daddy was slowly following, and I turned back to look at him.
Razuuk Benite was a cruel man. Evil to the core. I’d known that since being old enough to walk, I just hadn’t realized the true color of his depravity. With jet black hair tied at the nape of his neck, a thick moustache, and olive skin, he reminded me of Danny Trejo. And right then he looked like the monster Danny had become in From Dusk till Dawn: evil eyes full of hate and rage, and teeth bared like he was going to rip my throat out.
“Go on,” he urged, taking a step toward me and making me back up some more. “Get the fuck out of here then. You’ll be back.”
I swallowed, fear burning at the back of my throat. I turned and pushed out of the clubhouse and into the yard beyond. My daddy followed me, his brothers behind him looking confused but eager.
I headed toward the gate, wanting to get out of there as quickly as I could, when the floodlights came on, illuminating the entire yard. Bright fluorescent lights reflected off the many motorcycles lined up, but my gaze was drawn to the unmoving heap in the middle of the yard.
I glanced back at my daddy, watching how he folded his arms over his large chest and stared after me, a smile etched into his face.
My hand covered my mouth as I moved closer to the heap and realized what it was.
No, who it was.
“Daddy, no!” I cried out, dropping to my knees beside Scratch. I rolled him onto his back and gasped. His eyes were open, staring up at nothing, and blood trailed from his mouth and down from his forehead where the word traitor had been carved into his skin. His shirt had been torn open and in his chest were the words thou shalt not touch what’s not yours were carved into his skin.
His body was already cold, lifeless. He was gone. And I knew it was my fault.
I stood up and ran at my father, attempting to hit him, but he grabbed my wrists and threw me to the ground. I landed on my side and stared up at him, the tears falling now.
“You’re a slut, just like your mother was. You think I don’t watch your apartment, see what you do, who you fuck?” He spat on me and I sobbed harder. “You’re all grown up, right? You a woman now, Penny? You think you get to choose your life now? Wrong! I still own you. I say where you go, who you talk to, and I say who can fuck you.”
“But I didn’t!” I cried. “We didn’t.”
“No, but you almost did, and that piece of shit has been sniffing after you for too many years. Almost touched the crown jewels. Man needed to know that he can’t touch what don’t belong to him.”
He turned his back on me and I sobbed harder when I saw I had some of Scratch’s blood on my hands.
“You can’t do this,” I cried, hating him with every part of me. Every fiber of my being. I’d never known hate and rage like it. It was consuming me, burning me up and destroying me. “You can’t control a person, Daddy. Not like this. That’s not how life is!”
He swung back to look at me, his face betraying nothing as he crouched down to my level. “Penny, that’s where you’re wrong. I control everything, and when I’m done with it, I give it away. And I’m done with you, little girl.”
“You don’t control me! You don’t own me!” I screamed angrily, wishing I had a gun. Because if I did, I’d have aimed it at his head and fired with no hesitation.
My daddy laughed and stood back up. “Not anymore. One of these fine men do. Once they find out who it was that took you, they’ll end that motherfucker and then you’ll be their problem, not mine.”
I rubbed at the tears on my cheeks and stood up. “What?”
“Whoever finds out who took you and ends him gets you. You’re gonna be an old lady, little girl—a true biker slut, just like your mother.”
“I won’t,” I say quietly.
“Yeah, you will. You’ll marry the man I say you’ll marry or I’ll kill you myself, Penny,” he said with a sneer before walking away. “Let’s finish this party, brothers.”
The men and women headed back inside the clubhouse, leaving me alone. I stumbled back over to Scratch’s body, dropping down to my knees again as I cradled his head in my lap.
“I’m so sorry,” I sobbed, knowing it was all my fault.
I‘d known my father was insane, but I never thought he’d go that far. He had cut Scratch, scarring him badly, but this was murder. He’d murdered his own enforcer, and if he’d do that, I had no doubt that he’d kill me too.
My plan for leaving, for getting the hell away from there, seemed even more important then, because there was no way I was marrying one of the Viper men. I didn’t want to marry anyone—certainly not anyone that was connected to my father.
I gently placed Scratch’s head back down and stood up. My hands had blood on them, both figuratively and literally. Barring killing myself or running away and truly believing that I could disappear never to be found again, there was only one way out of this situation.
But I was just as scared of that option as I was of my father.
Because both choices made me feel weak, less than, and afraid.
I was a Benite. I was fierce and strong. Or at least I had been before my dark angel had kidnapped me and changed me into something else. Someone else.
Now I felt weak and afraid, and I needed help.
~ 22 ~
Now
Penny
“What do you need?” he asked, staring down at me, his eyes so familiar but so strange now that I could see his whole face.
I knew it was him right away. How could I not? I was drawn to him. Like a moth to a flame, the moment that clubhouse door was opened I felt his pull and I went to him. He was both a stranger and yet so familiar to me. My body automatically reacted to his scent and proximity, like it knew I was in the right place.
“Penny?” he said my name, the familiar sound sending a current straight to my core hard enough to make me sigh.
I hadn’t thought it would be that way—that seeing him again would affect me so much. I’d hoped that Scratch had wiped away some of the stain this man had left upon me, but apparently not.
“I need your help,” I mumbled, finally shaking free of some of my trance.
His coal-black eyes blazed as they moved over my skin, taking in my body like I was naked.
“Fighter?” another man asked from beside me.
So that was his name. Fighter. It was fitting of him through and through. He was a fighter in every sense of the word. And right then that was exactly what I needed.
“I’ve got this,” Fighter replied, his hard eyes still on me. He gripped my arm and started to pull me out of the room, but another man had stepped closer, blocking his path.
I knew something was wrong when I saw the veins in his neck pop out; I just did
n’t know what.
“Is this who I think it is?” asked a man that, despite looking like he was in his late thirties, had silver-gray hair and beard.
“Yeah,” Fighter grunted. He wrapped a large hand around my bicep and pulled me to him protectively. “And no one’s fucking touching her.”
The silver-haired man looked me up and down, a scowl pulling between his eyebrows. He reached into his cut and I tensed against Fighter. His grip on me tightened and I forced myself to stay calm as the familiar scent of him wrapped itself around me.
Was going there a mistake? Probably. Yet I didn’t regret it for one moment.
The other man pulled his cigarettes from his cut and lit one with a shake of his head. “You’re looking pretty good for a dead girl,” he drolled calmly.
“And you all look good for a club that kidnapped and threatened the daughter of Razuuk Benite,” I bit out, my skin flushing. Less than six hours out from under my daddy’s club and I was already using his name to keep me safe? That was bullshit. I needed to grow the hell up. “I haven’t told him,” I said firmly, trying to show whose side I was on, and then I scowled, because I wasn’t sure how my life had come to this—choosing a side between my evil father and the evil man who had kidnapped me.
“Stop talking, Penny,” Fighter grumbled.
I looked up at Fighter. “I don’t intend to either,” I added, ignoring the rumble coming from Fighter’s chest.
God, he was beautiful.
He really was the Devil.
Dark, delicious, and perfect to seduce virgins.
He’d seduced me; every single part of me, body and soul.
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” the other man replied, drawing my attention back to him.
“I do. I’m saying that I have no intention of letting him find out that my kidnapping had anything to do with any of you. Not any of your men, or the club, nothing.” I took a deep breath. “But I’ll warn you that he already suspects it. I don’t know how, or why, but I swear it had nothing to do with me.”
Fighter: The Devil's Highwaymen Nomads #4 Page 14
