by Stella Dawn
I need to compare data over a length of time to get a full table of results. There could be currents down deep that are coming from the ocean floor. Literally anything could be down there and it’s my job to find out what.
I can’t wait to see the bay come alive with Ih’il, swimming and hunting. They like to build little floating fortresses to adorn the bay, weighted so they don’t move much but not anchored. That way they can swim, sleep and eat without ever coming into shore.
They must feel so confined in the camp. I’m even more determined to do my job and do it well to get them out in the water where they belong.
I feel that Tsunis might be overreacting, but I don’t blame him. It’s clear from his attitude nothing I say will change his behavior so I should probably just appreciate the fact he wants to see me safe.
I resist being like a delicate flower though. It’s as if this has given him an excuse to see me as he wants me to be, not as how I actually am.
I look around the bay and I see nothing, only Malcheck turning in a circle in silent contemplation. It’s almost as if he keeps danger away just by being there. His eyes keep glaring across the landscape and I wonder if he’s ready to attack.
I’d be none the wiser if Xoks did attack. The more I look around myself, the more I realize how much I can’t see. When I stand up to change places, I see Tsunis further down the beach, checking the shoreline.
I appreciate that he needs me to be safe. But I’m not his delicate flower. I don’t want to be put in a vase and kept in the corner of the room. I’m adventurous and strong and if he loves me, he needs to see that.
He needs to embrace all of me. That means letting me do my work, trusting me and believing in me.
Watching my arrogant lover come trotting up the beach towards me, I have no idea how to achieve that.
24
Tsunis
After a long day, we return to the colony nearly spent from exhaustion. Constantly keeping my guard up while watching Eliana work was incredibly tiring, and all I want to do is retire to either her hut or mine, curl up together, and work out some of my lingering aggression over the Zerok’s folly.
I have no idea why he thought he could just take Eliana and get away with it, as if she’s just a commodity, and it makes me both angry and confused. She’s a living being - not something to steal, trade, or buy - but those damned half-robots don’t have a clue about the natural order of things.
I don’t like uncertainty, especially when it comes to things like my enemies or my lovers. We must deal with this new conflict with the Xoks and quickly, regardless of what my father has to say about it.
When we reach the colony, I drop her off at her hut before returning to mine, intent on taking a long shower before meeting her again for dinner. There’s to be a gathering of the entire colony afterward. We Ih’il are a social people and draw our energies from sharing conversation and meals with one another, as well as other celebratory events like dance and storytelling.
After cleaning up and changing my clothes, I make my way back to Eliana’s hut, but she’s not there. I find her in the dining hut surrounded by a group of Ih’il females, regaling them with tales of her life back on Earth and how she’s adjusting to her life here with my people. They’re all completely enthralled, all eyes on her.
As if it’s hard not to look at her - I can’t ever seem to look away.
As if she has her own form of sixth sense, she catches my eye as I enter the hut. She ducks her head, almost shyly, looking up at me through her dark lashes, and raises a hand to give me a small wave. She’s so beautiful it causes my heart to clench painfully.
I want to go to her, but it’s clear she’s heavily involved in her conversation with the other females. Instead of disturbing her, I take my seat at the chief’s table, next to my father. I sit on his right side, the seat designated for he who will one day take over the leadership of the clan.
For my entire life I’ve known that I’ll be the next chief, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready. And now, with Eliana, I have so many questions about my future as it pertains to her. Will she be my mate? Will our people accept a human woman as my partner?
I observe her closely as I consume the evening’s meal. Although physically she looks nothing like my people, she does look like she belongs here, amongst them. Her laughter comes easily and both the females and the males come close to hear her speak. Maybe it’s just the novelty of having a human here with us, but it seems like there’s something more about her that attracts and holds their attention.
If my feelings toward her are any indication, I shouldn’t be surprised. After all, I started out completely unable to fathom ever getting along with her, and we both know how long that lasted.
The more I watch her interacting with my people, the more frustrated I become. I should feel warmed by their acceptance of her, but I just feel agitated. I want to be the one making her laugh and hearing her speak. I want to define whatever this is going on between us - I want her to want to define it.
When she was taken by Zerok I damn near went out of my mind. What if I hadn’t found her? What if she’d been killed? What if he’d hurt her even more than he did with that poisoned dart? What would I have done - what would have happened to me?
I can’t help but wonder what I am to her - am I just someone she’s passing the time with? Just having fun with? Because that’s not what she is to me, but then again, she doesn’t have the pressure of the leadership of an entire tribe pressing down on her, either.
Maybe she sees me only as a bit of fun.
After dinner, we all move out to the main gathering area and take our seats around a massive fountain that serves as a shrine to our water deities. Fires are also list to ensure we have light to see by in the quickly approaching darkness. Again, Eliana is enclosed within the same group of females - new friends, I assume - and I sit next to my father, unable to stop myself from scowling.
I can’t stop watching her. I watch as she intently watches both the females and males who get up to dance, offering the movement of their bodies as a blessing to our gods to assist her in her mission of aiding both our planet and people. She stares unabashedly, taking in the movements of the dance, the pounding feet, the writhing limbs.
I’m sure she’s never seen anything like it up close before. I know humans also have their own traditions, but as Earth is currently in shambles there’s not much time for humans to dedicate to celebrations. Although the Ih’il are also experiencing issues pertaining to our own survival, we still make sure to take time to show gratitude and deference to our gods.
I can tell that the male dancers are encouraged by her appreciating gaze, as they increase the effort of their dance. Of course, this only serves to further enrage me. I’m sure by now every male in this colony knows she and I have been intimate - or at least they’re aware of our closeness - so for them to try to entire her is an affront to both of us.
I allow it to continue for only a moment longer before I rise and approach her, feeling every bit the territorial male. I want everyone in this colony to know that we’re...something. That something is happening between us. That Eliana is mine for as long as she’s living here, and no one else’s.
I don’t even ask her if I can join her, just sitting myself down next to her instead. She greets me with a blinding smile and grabs my hand in hers, placing it on her lap. Wordlessly, she continues watching the dancers, her body nearly vibrating with happiness and the beat of the music.
I follow her lead when it comes to interacting with her in front of the tribe. I want so badly to kiss her - to hold her in my arms - but she seems content to merely hold my hand. Any contact at all is better than none and my mood lightens considerably with the knowledge that she’s comfortable with my people seeing us together.
The celebrations last long into the night, past sundown and after the stars come out. She makes an admirable attempt to stay until the very end, but I can te
ll she’s tired.
“Let me bring you back to your hut,” I say to her, bending my head low enough to allow my lips to brush her ear.
She shivers deliciously at my touch and nods, allowing my to pull her up from her seat. I don’t let go of her hand as we walk to her door. When we arrive, I don’t stop myself from leaning in and pressing my mouth to hers.
She leans into me receptively, pressing her chest to mine. She’s so warm from the heat of the fires and my blood hums at the feel of her. I feel my cock growing harder in response to her touch, but she pulls away before I can act on it.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Tsunis,” she says softly, making it clear that she wants to retire to her hut alone.
I’ll never force her into anything she doesn’t want, so I nod, trying not to convey my extreme disappointment. I want to spend the night with her, but not if she doesn’t want me.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Eliana,” I say, but I do kiss her one more time before I return to my own hut.
Once there, I throw myself down on my own bed. It’s late and I should try to get some sleep, especially seeing as Eliana and I have another full day ahead of us tomorrow, but I’m restless. Not only am I still completely turned on by the thought of her breasts pressed against me, I’m constantly worried about another Xok attempt to steal her.
I last thirty minutes before I rise from bed and leave my hut again, making my way back to hers. The extra guards are still posted outside of it, but they allow me to enter without pause. When my eyes adjust to the darkness of the space, I see that she’s curled up on her own bed, fast asleep and dreaming.
I know I shouldn’t wake her - she’s likely so spent, both physically and emotionally from the events of the past few days - so I only watch her for a few minutes before taking my leave. Disappointment radiates through me completely as I return to my hut, thinking about how to better make my feelings known to her.
Tomorrow - I’ll find a way to tell her tomorrow.
25
Eliana
The next morning I’m determined to prove to Tsunis I can take care of myself. I know he has important duties to do with his father and he can’t spend endless hours chasing after me.
I also want to put his mind at ease. The Xoks aren’t going to come again, they have shown no signs of coming back. I don’t think Zerok would give up that easily, but I also don’t think he wants to take on both the Ih’il and the EAO combined.
I have breakfast with the women. We sit on woven mats under the trees, sandy ground beneath us reminiscent of the beach over the ridge. We eat melons and something grainy which is somewhere between grains of rice and oatmeal. I would kill for a bit of bacon to put in it, or an egg.
One of the women points to the small animals nearby that look like cows but are small like goats. Eventually they will produce milk for the colony. Ih’il don’t use a lot of milk in their food but it considered a high luxury among them to have diary at all. She explains that they are looking for some birds so that they might have eggs, but bacon is beyond their understanding.
They don’t eat meat. They eat everything from the ocean, from big fish down to tiny clams. Killing a mammal is not something they understand.
I look around the circle at my friends. None of them are Ih’il and none of them are human. Two of them look like Ih’il but they have gills on their necks and fins along their arms and legs. Their toes and fingers are just slightly webbed.
Sisters born on a water planet; they had an Ih’il mother who ended up staying on the foreign planet with the fish she fell in love with. Their names are Silka and Sifian.
Kiara sits beside me, a four armed, eight-foot-tall monster. Her skin is dark blue, and she has lots of patches of dark blue hair. The fur extends right down her back in a falling pattern from her neck. Her eyes are quick and friendly, and she is very strong.
There is Halga and Iliantha, older women who are healers. A mixed bunch of young mothers and three middle aged mixed breeds that are hoping for an Ih’il husband. They resent me because they know a human will always be chosen over them.
Kiara, Silka and Sifian agree to come with me to the bay. All three of them want to do some foraging and look at the sea. The sisters can’t wait for the bay to be fully investigated so they can swim.
We walk up the ridge, laughing and talking. Kiara sings a traditional warrior song of her people and we all hum along with her. When we reach the shoreline the two sisters take their baskets along the water and Kiara comes my way to sift through the rock pools.
I move along the edge of the water, cataloging all the fish I see and updating the daily results for each species. I check my underwater traps and find that they have caught some larger fish. I haul in the cages and observe the fish caught inside.
I’ve caught three different types and they all look fairly aggressive. It’s a good thing the Ih’il didn’t just jump in and swim here because these guys look dangerous as well as competitive. All three species have some pretty wicked teeth and one looks poisonous.
They aren’t very big though. I’ve seen no evidence of a big hunter like a shark. Once my review is complete then seasoned men like Malcheck will begin clearing the bay. They will shift into their fish form and sweep through daily, eliminating plant or animal life that is hostile and encouraging the growth of those who are benign or beneficial.
It may take a few months of that kind of improvement before the bay is ready for the general populace. I assume that Tsunis will be involved in the process.
I look down at one of my caught fish, twisting in his underwater cage. His scales are blue silver, just like Tsunis. He even has a little flare of seaweed green hair down his back.
I can imagine what it will be like when the Ih’il have completely taken over the bay. I can’t wait to see them swimming, diving and hunting together. Maybe I won’t see that day. It makes me sad.
I look back at my caught fish again and my focus blurs as I think of Tsunis. My memories are so strong they affect my concentration. He fills my mind, it’s as if I can’t move without thinking about him.
I wonder what he thinks of my independent move this morning. I made a point of leaving with the girls before he usually comes to see me. I know it’s a bit immature and he might actually be scared to see me missing. It doesn’t matter though; I have a point to prove.
A shadow darkens my books and I look up, not surprised to see Tsunis standing over me. He looks angry but somehow, sad as well. There’s a sag to his shoulders that I’ve never seen before and trouble lurks in his eyes.
“Good morning.” I smile brightly, hoping to cheer him up. His face doesn’t change. “I’m sorry, Tsunis. I just wanted to get an early start and the women wanted to come up to see the bay…”
His face hardens and it’s like he’s not even listening. I start to frown, ready to ask him what the deal is, but he just grunts and walks away.
I feel a bit hurt. He didn’t even really say hi. I wonder what his problem is. I don’t understand him. Sometimes he’s so sweet and tender, other times he’s like this, completely shut off.
I notice a couple of guards up on the ridge. Tsunis must have brought them with him. Kiara is up there talking to a slender Ih’il man. I smile at that, wondering if the two might hook up. It would certainly be interesting.
Two of the guards stay on the ridge, one of them Kiara’s young warrior and she stays to chat with him. Two others come down and make a sweep of the nearby salt bush that clings to the rocks.
On his way past one of the guards stops, looking into my tank.
“Hey, those look like humpback whales,” he says in astonishment. I nod to him, grinning.
“You know what humpback whales are?”
“Yes, I saw them in a video. Three pairs from Earth were relocated to an ocean planet where I lived for a few years. Beautiful things. But these are the size of my hand!”
“Fascinating isn’t it?” I’m so excited to find someone who understands. “I hav
e no idea what else might be in here, but the hunters can start sweeping it soon.”
“What will we do with these little guys?” He wiggles his fingers over the tank, and they bob to the surface.
“Amazing!” He cries, “They’re tame!”
I grin at him. “Yeah, I’ve been feeding them mosquito larvae. They like me.”
He looks up with a face full of enthusiasm. “This is cool, man. I love your work.”
I feel my cheeks grow hot all of a sudden.
“Oh, wow. Thanks, I guess.”
He shrugs and goes back to looking at the little whales. I show him another tank nearby of really aggressive fish, telling him how they could dominate the population if they weren’t controlled. Then I show him some different types of seaweed. He’s a keen learner and I don’t even think about the fact he’s meant to be guarding me.
It’s nice to have an assistant, not just to hand me tools and record things, but talk about the discoveries. It’s nice to have someone just as excited as I am.
A movement at the corner of my eye makes me look up. Its Tsunis, stalking away from the beach as fast as he can. I wonder what his problem is, but soon get lost in the work and forget all about it.
26
Tsunis
Once again, Eliana has managed to drive me completely insane. For some reason, she has this crazy idea in her head that she’s a burden to me, even though we were paired up by Taryne and Yos for this mission together. I’m supposed to be assisting her and looking out for her, but this morning she completely bypassed me by waking early and taking some of her new friends with her to work instead.
I’ve never been so completely frustrated with someone I’m also so completely enamored with, and that in itself is annoying.
The one thing I know for certain is that no matter what she does, my feelings for her aren’t going to change, so I might as well just deal with her near-constant desire to not be controlled. The fact of the matter is that we’re not very good at communicating with each other. There are definitely other, more fun things we’re good at, but expressing ourselves clearly is not one of them.
