Miles’ dick was, of course, hard. How could it not be after that whole talk about sex and then holding Charlie? There had been nothing sexual about it, but it had been so long since he’d held someone like that, that his body has responded fiercely. But to ask Brad under these circumstances, when the man was obviously tired himself and while Miles was holding a sleeping Charlie? It felt so wrong. Times like this he truly hated himself, hated his stupid body that wouldn’t cooperate.
“I don’t mind, honestly,” Brad said.
Miles sighed. “Please,” he acquiesced. “I’d really appreciate it.”
“I like sucking you off,” Brad said softly, carefully getting off the bed to make it to Miles’ side. “It’s very soothing for me, especially when I’m stressed.”
Huh. That was interesting.
No more words were spoken as Brad expertly took him in and brought him to climax in minutes. Miles’ eyes were already sinking shut when Brad was still tucking his cock back into his bottoms. “Thank you,” he managed.
“My pleasure.”
Miles felt the bed dip again. Was Brad staying? He was almost asleep when Brad spoke again. “It’s always my pleasure.”
9
Brad was in his car two minutes after dismissal. Teaching had been impossible today, his head a chaotic mess. Luckily, his students were good kids, for the most part, who seemed to sense something was off with Mr. Kent today, and didn’t take advantage.
He’d fallen asleep next to Charlie. In Miles’ bed. He had woken up hours later, completely disoriented, and hadn’t been able to sleep again. Charlie had eaten a little bit, and had gone right back to bed. Miles’ bed. Where he had slept peacefully for the first time since the attack. Miles had been quietly snoring through the night as well, relaxed after Brad had given him a hand job.
Brad had been too worried to fall back asleep. What did this mean, the fact that they were in bed together? Was this becoming a thing now, the three of them together? It was all becoming too fucking complicated, though he couldn’t deny the idea of being with Miles and Charlie made his blood pump faster. They both had something he craved.
The joy Charlie exuded was so calming to Brad. Just being with him, reveling in his sweet kindness made Brad happy. Plus, he was so beautiful it took Brad’s breath away at times. Sharing a room with him all this time, it had been perfect and horrible at the same time. He wanted what he would never have, and there were times it physically hurt.
With Miles, it was something else entirely. Admittedly, the guy was easy on the eyes, but it was the thought of sucking him that got Brad’s heart beating faster. His head was always so busy inside, but with Miles’ cock in his mouth it quieted down. It was peaceful, as fucked-up as it may sound.
They hadn’t fucked, or more accurately, Miles hadn’t fucked him again. God, Brad had wanted him to, but he didn’t know how to make sure Miles would be blindfolded again. He couldn’t let him see his junk, deformed and mangled as it was. Charlie could claim all he wanted it wasn’t that noticeable, but Brad knew better. Fuck no, no one could look at that and still want anything to do with him. Miles would boot him out the door instantly. The guy could do so much better, and they both knew it.
No, the thought of the three of them together was a pipe dream. Maybe Miles would develop a thing for Charlie. He seemed like his type, and Miles sure as hell was Charlie’s. It was good that they hung out while Brad worked, right? It gave them a chance to grow closer, maybe develop something deeper?
A deep stab in his heart made Brad swallow. It would be perfect, Miles and Charlie together. Charlie needed someone he could trust, someone honorable. Plus, Miles wasn’t a strict top, so that worked out well since Charlie definitely wasn’t a bottom-only, despite looking like the perfect twink. No, the guy loved to fuck. Never got much chance to, with his asshole boyfriend, but now that he’d finally gotten rid of that loser he’d have a chance to build something real. He deserved it.
Brad sighed deeply, rubbed his temple. He should help them find each other, be happy for them. It wasn’t like he had a chance with either of them anyway. Even if Miles did like him as much as he claimed to, he’d stop as soon as he knew about Brad’s dick.
Besides, Miles couldn’t fulfill the void Brad so desperately wanted to see filled. He was too young, for once. Too perfect, too. Too kind and smart and composed. Not the type to be the sick fuck Brad was and needed.
And as for Charlie, fuck no. The kid was too sweet, too nice and kind. He deserved so much better than Brad with all his fucked-up issues. No, they were better off as friends because anything more would only end with him hurting Charlie and Charlie walking away.
Brad drummed his fingers on the wheel as he drove, lost in thought. He jerked as suddenly police sirens went off right behind him. What the…
Oh, fuck. Zack. He should’ve known. Thank fuck he came prepared. He’d known this would happen at some point since Zack didn’t know where Charlie was, and Brad was easy to track through his job. He was more surprised it had taken Zack this long to make a move. Charlie had said Zack had been gone for some kind of training, so that must’ve delayed him.
He twisted his sneaky little dash cam sideways and pulled over, stayed seated with the engine off and his hands clearly visible on the wheel. Zack had never liked him—and that was the understatement of the year. He could guess what the cop’s game was here, but he wasn’t giving the asshole any excuse to use force.
He checked his mirror. Zack was not alone in the car. That might be his way out of this. He waited till Zack had walked up, signaled for him to turn his window down. He turned the engine briefly back on to power the windows, slid the driver’s window down. “Officer Waitley,” he said. “What can I do for you?”
“Where is he?”
Okay, then. No small talk. He could lie, of course, but why would he? They both knew the truth. “If he wanted you to know, he would’ve contacted you.”
“You tell me, or things will get very unpleasant for you.”
Brad took a deep breath, forced down his anger. “As unpleasant as they were for Charlie or did you have something else in mind?”
The smile on Zack’s face was scary as fuck. “I wouldn’t put my cock inside you if you paid me, you fucking man-whore. Don’t think I don’t know what you do at the club, sucking cocks left and right. You’re filthy.”
“Two minor corrections. I’m not a whore, since I don’t charge for my services. And secondly, I’m a clean cock sucker. Unlike you, Mr. Gonorrhea. Unfortunate little accident there, right?”
Zack leaned over in the car, brought his face close to Brad’s. Perfect, in full view of his dash cam. “You have no idea what I can do to you.”
“Actually, after seeing what you did to Charlie, I have a pretty good idea. You beat him up, you fucking asshole.”
Brad’s voice was calm, but he was shaking with anger.
“He’s mine, Brad, so I can do whatever the hell I want. Don’t think for a second you can keep him from me, you deviant, sick fuck.”
Fuck, he would lose it if this motherfucker kept this up. The only thing making him keep that last, thin grip on his temper was the knowledge that not only would Zack throw his ass in jail, he’d discover the dash cam and everything would be for nothing.
“On that, we disagree, asshole. He’s not yours, he never was, and he never will be. Now, are you gonna charge me with anything or can I go home?”
Zack retreated from the window. “You were doing fifty in a forty zone.”
“Bullshit, and we both know it. But what the fuck, write me a ticket. I’ll contest it in court, see how the judge feels about abuse of police power.”
“I’ll let you get off with a warning this time, but be assured, Brad, I’m watching you. You’d better tell Charlie to come back, or there will be consequences.”
Brad’s hands shook as he closed the window. He didn’t even wait for Zack to get back in his car, but took off. There will be consequences…it was like a
bad movie script. Who the fuck did this guy think he was? At least he had it all on cam, so hopefully Connor would be able to do something with it. Or Miles.
He took the first street to the right, then turned left, then left again. He parked at a flower shop, wanting to make absolutely certain Zack wasn’t following him. After ten minutes, he took off again, but kept looking in his mirror until he pulled in the driveway.
Josh was in the living room, reading a book, but he was the only one there.
“Hi,” Brad said. “Where’s everyone?”
“Hey man,” Josh said. “Erm, lemme think. Connor has a job interview, Noah is at uni, Indy is shopping, and Miles and Charlie are in Miles’ room.”
Charlie and Miles were together. In Miles’ bedroom. Maybe his fears would come true sooner than later. Brad swallowed back the sudden tightness in his throat. “I’m gonna check on them,” he said.
Josh nodded and dove back into his book. Brad walked into the hallway. The bedroom was all quiet, so he opened the door softly. He found both men in bed, plus Max, who was napping on the floor. Brad kneeled next to his dog to hug him and received a couple of licks as a heartfelt greeting.
Charlie was closest to the door, sleeping on his stomach in a shirt and boxers, the sheets kicked off. He looked so young, so frail like this.
Miles stirred when Brad walked over to his side. He’d put underwear on underneath his pajamas, Brad noted, probably as a consideration to Charlie. It said a lot about the kind of man Miles was.
He sat down on the bed, put a hand on Miles’ stomach, underneath his pajama top. The man’s misty blue eyes opened immediately, dark with want, and his face tightened.
“It hurts,” were the first words out of his mouth, barely audible. “Dammit, I’m so fucking horny.”
Brad’s eyes softened. Poor guy. “Bathroom,” he simply said. “Come on.”
Miles was in pain, Brad could tell from the way he moved. He was walking with O-shaped legs, stumbling into the bathroom. Brad shut the door behind them. “What do you need?” he asked.
“God, I’m sorry. Please, Brad, I’m sorry. Didn’t wanna jack off with Charlie there. This is not…it’s bad, right now. It fucking hurts.”
Brad cupped his cheeks, forced Miles to make eye contact. “It’s okay. I’m here, tell me what you need.”
With unsteady fingers, Miles got rid of his top, then his bottoms. “Can I fuck you? I need to…” His body shivered violently.
The one advantage of this house was that there was literally lube everywhere, including in this bathroom. Brad grabbed it from the bathroom counter, squeezed some out.
Miles was standing with shaky legs, his cock purple and his eyes glazed over with need. Brad wordlessly coated the man’s cock, then turned his back toward him and started stripping.
When he reached his underwear, he hesitated. No, Miles needed him. This was not the time to be difficult. Besides, the guy was too far gone to even notice, probably. Hopefully. He took it off as nonchalantly as he could, shivering with tension. Apprehension battled with the deep contentment stemming from Miles’ need for him. He grabbed some more lube, spread it inelegantly in his own hole.
He walked toward the sink, gripped it with two hands and bent over.
“Come on, big guy, I’m ready for ya.”
Miles walked over, unsteady. “Prep,” he said. “Don’t I need to prep you?”
Brad looked over his shoulder. “I’m good. Ease in slow, okay? After that, you’re good to go.”
Shaky fingers grabbed his hips, and he opened wide. Brad’s cock was soft, as was to be expected, but a thrill of excitement ran over his spine. There was something very masculine and raw about Miles right now, and Brad craved it. Miles’ tip pushed against his outer ring, then breached it. Brad bore down, let him in. He canted his ass, pushed it back further and leaned on his arms.
“Fuckfuckfuckfuck,” Miles stammered as he burned his way inside, filling him inch by inch until he was fully seated. “Won’t last long.”
“I know. Keep going. Fuck through it,” Brad encouraged him.
“You okay? Please, Brad, tell me you’re okay. I’m not hurting you?”
“I’m good, I swear. Let go, babe.” The word slipped out. Hopefully Miles would be too out of it to notice.
Miles groaned, pulled out and slammed back in, fucking the breath out of Brad’s lungs. “Oh, fuck,” Miles said, his voice tight. He slammed in again, made the bottles on the counter rattle. “Brad!”
Brad’s heart clenched as Miles shouted his name when he climaxed inside of him. He was damn proud that he could offer this to the man releasing inside him. He did this. This was his doing. Miles’ breaths turned to sobs as he fucked straight through his orgasm, the cum dripping down Brad’s legs. He took it, bent over even deeper as Miles unleashed on him—deep, brutal thrusts that made his teeth rattle.
The bathroom door opened, but Miles didn’t hear it, blind to his need. Brad looked under his arm. Charlie was standing in the doorway, his mouth dropping open as he watched them. Brad sent him a reassuring smile. He didn’t care if Charlie saw him, saw them. Wouldn’t be the first time his friend watched him get fucked. Charlie had watched him suck off complete strangers in the club, even witnessed him getting fucked a time or two.
Miles’ body jerked, and he deposited another load inside Brad. Good. That had to offer some relief. He should have done more this morning. Clearly, that one blow job had not been enough. The four orgasms of yesterday had been awesome, but the man still couldn’t last longer than twenty-four hours. At least this should tide him over till tomorrow, right?
He was so lost in thoughts that he didn’t notice Miles’ hand sneaking around until it was on his cock. Brad’s completely limp cock.
“Oh, no.” Miles’ words were soft, but Brad felt them in his very soul. “What have I done?”
Miles pulled out with incredible gentleness as Brad buried his head in his heads on the sink, too humiliated to face him. What a pathetic excuse for a man he was, that he couldn’t even get it up when this hot, sexy man fucked him so perfectly.
“Brad…”
“Go away,” Brad said.
“I’m so sorry…”
Yeah, that’s what he needed, pity. Fuck, no. He was done with this. He’d known it wouldn’t last, that Miles would be repulsed as soon as he knew. Who the fuck wanted a limp freak like him? No one.
A trembling hand softly landed on his shoulder. He shook it off. “Get the fuck out.”
Cum was still dripping down his legs, a sorry testament to the only thing he was still good for. Without that, he’d have nothing left.
“Brad, I…”
He pushed himself up, spun around. “Get the fuck out!”
Miles looked dead pale and stricken, as if Brad had slapped him. He stumbled back, almost tripping over his own feet. Brad looked past him, where Charlie stood, eyes wide. One look at the pure shock on his best friend’s face and Brad crumpled. His legs gave out and he sagged to the floor.
“No, Brad, no. He thinks he hurt you,” Charlie said, his voice surprisingly firm. Brad looked up, as Charlie held out a hand to stop Miles from walking out. “You didn’t hurt him.”
“Look at him! He can’t even look at me…” Miles’ voice was broken, as if he’d been cut to pieces. Funny, because that’s exactly how Brad felt.
“You have to tell him, babe,” Charlie pleaded.
This was to Brad, obviously. No way in hell was he embarrassing himself even more than he already had. He dropped his head on the floor, content to pretend he was a rag.
“Stop walking away, dammit. You misunderstood. He’s not in pain, not physically anyways.”
Brad closed his eyes. It seemed he didn’t need to embarrass himself. Charlie was doing a damn fine job for him.
“I don’t understand.” Miles sounded confused. What the fuck was there to be confused about?
Wait. Why was Charlie going on about Brad not being hurt? Did Miles think he…
Oh, shit. He’d interpreted Brad’s lack of arousal to pain. He thought he’d been too rough.
He opened his eyes, pushed himself into a sitting position. “You weren’t hurting me,” he said gruffly.
Miles turned around, his cock gone soft by now, slapping against his bare leg. “Then what the hell is going on?”
Brad met Charlie’s eyes, who were pleading with him to tell the truth. Oh, he might as well now. Miles was done with him anyway after this drama. He slowly rose, forced himself to uncover his groin.
“I had testicular cancer. They removed one testicle.”
Miles eyes dropped to his groin. “Yeah, so?”
Okay, not the reaction he was expecting. “I have one ball. The other one is an empty sac.”
Miles crossed his arms. “I gathered as much from your previous statement, not that I can spot the difference from here. Is that why you wouldn’t let me touch you?”
“Erm, partly. I, erm, also have been experiencing erectile issues. You know, trouble getting hard.”
“Is that caused by the cancer? Did they damage any nerves?”
“No. Everything is normal physically. They say it’s psychological.”
Miles arms uncrossed and his eyes went all soft. “You could’ve told me.”
“Yeah, ‘cause it’s such an easy thing to open with. Hi, I’m Brad. Oh, yeah, before I forget: I have a limp dick and only one testicle.”
“Sarcasm is kind of your defense mechanism, isn’t it? That, and being plain rude. Why the fuck would you think I’d care, other than that I’m sorry for you?”
Brad frowned. “Because it’s hella not sexy, and a big turn off.”
“Do you realize who you’re talking to? Brad, my love, I would really appreciate a turn off, if that were the case, but sadly, your one-ball-body does not turn me off in the least. Neither does your limp dick, as you called it. In fact, if you would be so kind as to lower your attention to my cock, yes, there it is, I am hard once again. If there is any reason for me to rethink our arrangement, it’s because you turn me on too much, not the opposite.”
No Shame: The Complete Series: Including exclusive bonus materials and deleted scenes Page 92
