by Jeff Tippett
While working with clients, I tell them to pick two of these three: fast, quality, or cheap. When they ask for all three, I have to tell them it’s not possible. I manage that upfront so that I don’t disappoint.
The main point here is that you can’t do everything and be everything for everyone. And acknowledging this fact up front likely won’t hurt trust; it’s likely to increase it.
8. Be open to feedback
I wish I did everything perfectly—every time. But the reality is, I don’t. Neither do you. We’ll make mistakes. We’ll miss the mark. We’ll have areas we haven’t even thought about. Other people can add valuable feedback. Perhaps your audience can. So listen.
Being open to feedback and incorporating it, as appropriate, will most likely boost others’ trust. If you think you know everything and the best way to do everything, you’re likely only fooling yourself. Others will see that, and it will negatively impact their trust in you.
9. Make time
I’m guessing that previous generations didn’t respond to the question, “How are you doing?” with, “Busy!” quite so often as we do today. But don’t you long for a different response? Why are we so busy? We have more technology and aids than we ever have before. Shouldn’t they be freeing up time?
I think we sometimes try to make ourselves feel important by telling people we’re busy. After all, if we’re busy, it suggests we’re accomplishing things. And if we’re accomplishing things, doesn’t that make us important? And if we’re important, certainly others should naturally trust us.
But not so fast.
In his book Essentialism, Greg McKeown builds an impressive case for doing less and doing it more thoroughly. My speaking coach referred this book to me after watching me try to juggle a million balls, as my ADHD often prompts me to do. And she’s right—I am better served to do less and remain focused. So are you.
Among other things, doing less can allow us to spend more time with others. And making time for your audience will show you care and provide a mega dose of trust.
This would be a great time to look back at Chapter 7 titled “Making A Connection.” How can you make time for your audience and, in doing so, create a deeper connection?
I can’t tell you how to adjust your calendar, how to do more but to a greater degree—but I can tell you that, if you do, and if you make time for your audience, you can expect their trust in you to grow. So, too, will your ability to persuade. And isn’t that the superpower we’re all looking for?
10. Be reliable
We’ve discussed delivering as promised, but there’s a similar, yet different, concept, equally important to building trust: being reliable.
And for the sake of our conversation in this book, I’d say that reliability is the other nine tips working in concert, and without exception. It’s the culmination; the product of the work you put in. It’s the outcome of everything working harmoniously.
To recap: Without trust, nothing else in this book matters. It’s the cornerstone for persuasion. So, before going back to Chapter 1, looking for ways to begin unleashing your superpower of persuasion, focus now on this chapter. This chapter matters the most. Without it, persuasion will never happen.
Another industry expert’s perspective:
When I first started out podcasting two-plus years ago, I remember three pieces of information I learned: The average podcast lasts seven episodes, the average number of downloads per episode is 150, and every podcaster has to help her audience “know, like, and trust” the host.
I knew I could go well beyond seven podcast episodes, but I had no idea how many people would listen, much less know, like, and trust me. After all, I was on a mission to understand the complexities of health behavior change in the workplace and why our industry is so stuck.
Knowing my subject matter was niche and my views were nontraditional in a very traditional industry, I wasn’t going to be in the top of iTunes or garner the audience of Tim Ferris or Freakonmics. But still, I wanted to at least reach the average number of downloads per episode.
So what did I do? Obsessively checked my stats, of course! I did this for quite a few months until, frankly, I didn’t think it was productive anymore. I refocused on producing my show and hoped my message would resonate.
Then something happened—I started getting a few emails from people who were thanking me for my podcast and my message. They were tired of our industry not changing, as well, but felt they didn’t have a voice in the matter. I wrote back to each and every one and even talked to a few on the phone. In fact, one has become a friend.
After going to an industry conference to speak, it was amazing meeting people who say they listen to my podcast. One guy even showed me that I was one of two podcasts he listened to. Maybe I was on to something, but would they buy?
The true test of building an audience was selling a product (yes, for real money) that could help them challenge the status quo in their organizations. It was scary, but I proceeded to fill all seven small-group training spots!
As I look back over the two-plus years of hosting my podcast, there are three things I’ve done to build trust with my audience (even if I didn’t know I was doing it):
Be your authentic self: I don’t put on a front. I talk about my screwups, I ask guests questions that come up as we talk (instead of sticking to a script), and I talk about how hard it can be to challenge common thinking. I believe people are craving authenticity in a social media world that doesn’t show the hard stuff.
Give until it hurts: There have been times when I’m staying up late to get a podcast episode out, responding to a post in my free Facebook group, or working on a new free guide, wondering if it’s worth it. I mean, I’m a business owner. . . Shouldn’t I start selling? The truth is that people will be more likely to buy from people they know, like, and trust. I guarantee I wouldn’t have filled up my small-group training without giving out free (and valuable) content first.
Consistency: It takes a while for people to get to know you, much less trust you. Showing up when you say you will, delivering helpful content, and not disappearing when things get tough all build trust. In fact, about a year ago, I skipped a few weeks, as things got busy. A listener reached out to check if I was okay. That not only touched me but made me realize I needed to show up consistently. Now, every Wednesday, I publish a new podcast episode. If I’m going to take another hiatus, I’ll be sure to tell them why I’m taking a breather.
Fast forward to current day, and I barely check my podcast stats. The last time I did, I’m getting the average downloads in one day instead of one month. My podcast audience continues to grow as my regular listeners recommend it to everyone they come across. Because they trust me, they are my best advertising.
Jen Arnold
RedesigningWellness.com
Ready for the next step? Let’s talk about the importance of the greater good.
Questions for Reflection
Can you think of a time when someone broke trust with you? What happened? How did you feel?
This chapter identifies ten ways you can build trust. Of these, which ones are you strong in?
Of these ways to build trust, in which ones are you weak, and how?
How do you think you can improve your areas of weakness?
Have you broken the trust of someone in your life?
How can you seek to repair it?
Now that you’ve come to better understand persuasive communications, let’s return to where we began: the adoption of my daughter.
Completing an international adoption in a country in collapse, in six and a half months, is a pretty remarkable task. Admittedly, while in the middle of the process, it seemed like I would never find success, and success looked like bringing my daughter to American soil.
But it did end. Obstacles were overcome. Boundaries were destroyed. And I’d attained success.
After landing in Miami, I found myself standing
in the airport concourse, stunned that this ordeal was over. And for a brief moment, I was proud; I had finally completed my mission to adopt this baby. I guess I did have reason to be happy with my work. After all, my new daughter arrived safely as a direct result of my efforts.
But within moments, the sense of accomplishment went out the window. The short-lived self-congratulations gave way to wonder.
I looked down at her as she whimpered. Turns out, she had double ear infections, and the cabin pressure of the plane had caused extreme pain.
As I looked at her, I began to wonder what her life would be like. Would she be a doctor and heal the sick? Would she be a teacher, educating hundreds of students who would then impact thousands of lives? Would she be a humanitarian and relieve suffering? Would she go back to Haiti to help her country of origin?
While, obliviously, I couldn’t answer any of those questions, what I did now know was that my impact wasn’t limited to the completion of the adoption.
The adoption was more like a stone being tossed into a lake or pond. You’ve done that, haven’t you? Tossed a rock into the water? There’s a deep sound as the rock impacts the water and begins heading to the bottom. Then, there are ripples that extend beyond the point of impact.
I now viewed my adoption as that rock entering the water. It was the genesis for ripples that would extend well beyond the point of impact. The good would extend well beyond my adoption as my new daughter began to change lives within her sphere.
This realization completely changed my thinking of my adoption and, by extension, my work in general.
It’s easy for me to get focused on the daily details that it takes to keep my work going. There are emails, phone calls, meetings, deals to close, and goals to accomplish.
But there’s something bigger; with a focus on helping others, my work will extend well beyond.
What is it that you’re passionate about? What gets you out of bed? What gives you the energy?
Entrepreneurs aren’t just building businesses. They create jobs, leading to a mom being able to provide for her family. Perhaps that looks like her son getting the tutoring he needs to find success in school. Can you imagine the possibilities?
Healthcare workers aren’t just treating patients. Their work brings life to families and clarity during times of crisis. They heal young children, granting them a new lease on life. And then these children grow up and positively impact people around them.
Community activists aren’t just rallying the troops. They are leading changes that have the potential to impact lives today and beyond. They are creating policy changes that can give marginalized groups new opportunities to succeed.
So, what is it that you do? What’s your passion? Now, think big. How are you impacting lives beyond your daily activities?
My point is this: When we understand that our efforts have ripples of impact, we can move past all the things that slow or misdirect us.
With a focus on the greater good, you’re unstoppable; your actions will impact lives well beyond what you can dream or imagine. And the superpower of persuasive communication is the tool that will help you change lives.
Grab your cape. There’s work to be done! And you’re the perfect person to do it.
Known to many as Mr. Persuasion, Jeff Tippett wrote the book on persuasive communications.
Speaking to international audiences through keynotes and seminars, Jeff helps attendees increase their effectiveness, gives them powerful tools to reach their goals, and empowers attendees to positively impact and grow their organizations or businesses.
His second book, slated for a January 2019 release, is titled: Unleashing Your Superpower: Why Persuasive Communication Is The Only Force You Will Ever Need. His bold statement is that we all live or die based on our ability to persuade.
In 2014, Jeff founded Targeted Persuasion, an award-winning public affairs + communications firm. He has worked with renowned brands like Airbnb, The National Restaurant Association, The League of Women Voters, The League of Conservation Voters, plus others. Other industry experts have validated Jeff’s work with numerous awards including the prestigious The American Advertising Award.
The heart and soul of Jeff’s presentations are the emotional story he tells of adopting his youngest daughter from Haiti while the country’s government was collapsing. Through this near death experience of navigating civil unrest and institutional bureaucracy in a third world nation, Jeff learned valuable lessons on how to persuade others without ever manipulating. Jeff unpacks these secrets of the superpower of persuasion in every presentation.
