by Leah Kay
Maybe it is the ambiance, or that Sarah hasn’t seen Nathan in a few weeks, but something feels different in her. “Thank you for taking us out.”
“Thank our daughter for being amazing,” he replies, looking proudly at Lily.
Sarah leans in and kisses her on the head only to have Lily awkwardly wipe it off. They laugh together, momentarily feeling the connection they once shared. Over dinner, they discuss Lily’s trip to Philly later in the year. Sarah feels guilty for the physical distance between them. With a deep breath, she tries to reassure herself that this drastic measure is needed to save their marriage. Her thoughts are interrupted when a few strangers stop by their table to say hello to Nathan.
“Nathan, it’s good to see you here!” A man in his mid-fifties with salt-and-pepper hair greets him.
Standing up, Nathan shakes his hand. “Jack, been a while. How are you?” Jack is accompanied by a woman around the same age as him in a glamorous dress complete with expensive pearls. Nathan leans in and kisses Phoebe on her cheek. “You look great, Phoebe.”
They are joined by another couple, Mike and Leah, for a couple’s dinner date.
“Nathan, it’s been a while! How are you, buddy?” Mike exclaims as he pats Nathan on the back. Nathan says hello to both Mike and his wife Leah, both in their late fifties, elegantly dressed for their dinner date.
Nathan turns around and introduces his family. “Please meet my wife Sarah and my daughter Lilian.” As they shake hands, Nathan completes his introduction. “I worked for Jack and Mike when I first started at Genex. I owe a lot of my success to them. Now they have moved on to bigger and better things.”
Taking pride in their introduction, Mike states, addressing Sarah, “Nathan has always been smart and humble. You must be proud of him.”
Dressed in simple beige Capri pants, a light green sweater, and her self-made artsy earrings, she feels remotely out of place. “I am,” she calmly responds.
They introduce themselves to her. “Hello Sarah, I am Jack. I run operations for a biotech startup here, and this is my wife, Phoebe, she leads a marketing team at a consulting company.”
Mike follows with, “Nice to finally meet Nathan’s wife. I am Mike, I run Research and Development at the same firm as Jack, and this is my wife, Leah, she is our general counsel at the firm.” The women bask in their proud introductions as they shake Sarah’s hand.
“Sarah, what do you do?” Phoebe asks politely.
“I work at an art gallery downtown,” she replies meekly.
“So, you are an artist, how wonderful!” Leah says.
“We would love to come and check out your work sometime,” Phoebe adds eagerly.
“I just teach an art class for adults,” Sarah replies in a timid voice.
In an effort to help, Nathan interjects. “Sarah is a talented artist, and I am sure you will enjoy her work soon.” Tears start to sting Sarah’s eyes.
“We can’t wait to see it, Sarah. Let us know when you are ready,” Leah says, holding Sarah’s hand. Sarah nods, barely fighting her tears.
As they leave their table, Sarah excuses herself and hurries to the restroom. Tears start rolling down her cheek even before she makes it to the door. Standing at the counter, she stares at her reflection in the mirror and notices a woman who lost her spark over the years. Hearing footsteps coming towards the restroom door, she quickly ducks into one of the three stalls behind her to take a moment before rejoining her family for dinner.
She hears a familiar voice. “You are thinking what I am thinking, right?”
Touching up her makeup, a woman with another familiar voice says, “I wonder what they have in common.”
“What could you possibly have in common between a go-getter and … her?”
“He is ambitious, good looking and from the looks of it she barely takes care of herself.”
“Pretty sad. He deserves better.”
“I agree. Hope the daughter doesn’t turn out like her mother.” They fix their hair and makeup and head back out to join their husbands. With a huge lump in her throat, Sarah cleans up her face and joins her family.
Concerned by her aloofness, Nathan tries to engage her in conversation only to receive one-word responses. Finishing their dinner, they drive back home in complete silence. Being thoroughly perceptive to her mom’s change in behavior, Lily wishes them goodnight and retires to her room.
“Sarah, what’s wrong?”
“I don’t want to do this now.”
“Come on! Talk to me, please.”
“I don’t need you to defend me or my insignificant work in front of your worthy peers.”
Insecurity is a strange thing. It forces you to believe an ugly lie.
“I was trying to have your back,” Nathan pleads with a hint of desperation in his tone for having gone through these arguments one too many times.
“I don’t need you to. Have a nice trip back to Philadelphia,” she replies stonily and walks away.
Lying awake in the guest bedroom, Nathan reflects on their night and wonders what he could have done differently. Feeling sorry for ruining Lily’s celebration, he walks over to her room to check in on her. He knocks on her door and waits for her response. She opens the door and notices the anxious look on his face.
“I am sorry, Lily,” he says with an apologetic smile.
Overcome by helplessness, she asks, “Will you and Mom be okay?”
Her concern for them cuts deep. Taking her hand in his, he kisses her head. “We will be fine. It’s just a rough phase. We will ride this out together.”
Having made sure Lily is okay, he walks back to the guest room to get some sleep before his morning flight. But an endless loop of doubts, fears and regrets keeps him up throughout the night.
The following morning, Nathan knocks and waits outside Sarah’s room for a few minutes to try to make it right but is welcomed with complete silence. Disappointed, he kisses Lily goodbye and catches a cab to the airport. With an hour to board, he plugs in his headphones, leans back and closes his eyes at the gate. Isha crosses his mind involuntarily, and he contemplates Lily’s advice and decides to keep some distance from her. With everything else on his plate, he fails to see a need for another complication.
It has been a week since her late-night apology to Nathan. After reconnecting with Liam on the rooftop, Isha feels foolish blaming Nathan for her marital strife. She yields to Claire’s advice and extends an olive branch to Nathan. Except it may be too late. Not only has he not replied to her text, he has made no other attempts to get in touch with her. Isha hangs on to a sliver of hope in the face of her defeat. Distracting herself with prep work for their upcoming San Diego trip, she books her travel and finalizes the rollout materials for the site. To keep things straight in her head, she puts together a comprehensive to-do list. One of the tasks includes running the plan by Nathan to make sure she isn’t overlooking any detail.
Seeing that he is back in the office, she pings him on Instant Messenger. “Hello Nathan, Have a few minutes for a quick catch-up?”
“Free from 10 till 10:30 this a.m., stop by if you need me.”
“Thank you, see you soon.”
“K.”
Isha tries not to read into his messages too much, but she suspects he isn’t interested in meeting with her.
At 10:00 a.m. she knocks on his partially open door and notices he is on the phone. She lets herself in and takes a seat across from him. Minutes later, getting off his call, he looks at Isha. “What did you want to discuss?”
Taken aback by his abruptness, she says, “Good morning to you too. I want to talk to you about the San Diego visit in a few weeks.”
Ignoring her attempt to be social, he replies, “Sure, go ahead.”
Isha feels uncomfortable with his demeanor. “If you are busy, I can come back.”
; “I don’t see a need for that. I have fifteen minutes now, let’s do it.”
Taking a deep breath, she says, “We are thinking for day one it would make sense for you to kick off the initiative with the site leadership in the room.”
“Works for me, send me the slides, and I can kick it off. What else?”
Continuing to feel awkward with his curtness, Isha continues, “Regarding headcount for the site tour. Will you be joining us?”
“No. I spent my entire career at that site. I don’t need a tour.”
“Do you have any recommendations for hotels close to the site?”
“Hilton is a good one.”
“Great. I will call to block some rooms, would you like me to include you as well?”
“No, thanks, I will be staying with my family.”
“Right, I forgot your family lived there.”
With an air of nonchalance, he waits for her next question.
She takes his silence as his final input to the conversation. And having nothing else to ask, she contemplates whether this is a good time to apologize in person for her prior erratic behavior. She wonders if life would be infinitely easier if she stopped acting like a blithering idiot and didn’t spend all her time coming up with unique ways to make an apology. Seeing that he is no mood for social chitchat, Isha chooses to shelve that conversation. Gathering her things to leave his office, she moves deliberately hoping he engages her in a casual conversation. Noticing that he is already busy catching up on his email, she walks back to her office disheartened. Watching her walk away leaves him with a sinking feeling in his heart.
Isha and Claire head upstairs to the cafeteria to grab a quick bite before another batch of meetings take over their calendar in the afternoon. Standing in line to pay for their order, Claire realizes she left her wallet at her desk.
“Isha, mind getting my lunch?”
“Not at all, here’s my wallet. Go ahead and pay for the both of us. I need to run to the restroom quick.”
Grabbing her wallet, Claire says, “Sure, I will find us a table.”
She takes off to the restroom while Claire waits in line to pay.
Inching closer to the cashier, Claire grabs a $20 bill from the wallet. The cashier scans their food, and the total comes up to $20.75. She looks through a zippered sleeve within the wallet for 75 cents and comes across an antique finger ring but no change. At the back of the wallet, she finds another zippered sleeve with coins in it. She pays for their food and finds them a small table by one of the windows.
When Isha returns, Claire asks, “Whose ring is that in your wallet?”
“It was my grandpa’s. I was fifteen when I lost him unexpectedly to a heart attack. Ever since, I kept his ring as a memory. As long as I have it with me, I feel like he is looking after me.” She checks her wallet to make sure that the pocket is carefully zippered back and affectionately shares her fondest memories of him from the many summers they spent together at his lake house.
The next few days go by with more meetings, more catch-ups and, most importantly, with more snubs from the old man.
Friday around 10:00 a.m., the team receives a note from Nathan.
“Team,
I apologize for the short notice, but I got pulled into a lunch meeting this afternoon and will not be able to make it to our team lunch today. However, if you are interested in getting together for a happy hour after work, meet me at the Continental rooftop bar at 5:00 p.m. Thanks,
Nathan.”
By the end of the week, Isha is beyond perplexed by Nathan’s behavior. She is well aware of her reasons for wanting to ignore him, but she can’t fathom his rationale. Throughout the week, he kept their conversations strictly to work and not a word more. Her many attempts to apologize were botched by his mood swings, his calendar and his overall disinterest in her. This is what she wanted from the get-go, for them to have a purely professional relationship. But now that she has it, she feels restless about it. With her emotions calling the shots, she plans to go to the happy hour and set things straight.
The city knows how to welcome a summer weekend. Midtown Continental rooftop bar is bustling with young professionals looking to put their work week behind them with a round of fruity cocktails. Nathan and Jim grab a couple of beers from the indoor bar, which is now overcrowded with 20-somethings occupying the maroon velvet seats looking for a weekend romance. They head over to the courtyard to enjoy the fresh air while Nathan steals glances towards the door awaiting the arrival of Isha.
It took a grueling effort from him to ignore her all week. Although it made complete sense to maintain distance from her, he did not expect his distancing act to cause him such agony. To make things worse, she was nothing but sweet to him all week. He was betting on her to pull another one of her ignoring acts. Instead, she was lovely all week, and it took every ounce of his determination to nip her efforts in the bud.
His thoughts get a pleasant break at the sight of Isha and Claire grabbing drinks at the bar. Wearing a sleeveless black jumpsuit with strappy heels and her goddess hair lying softly on her back, Isha is turning eyes as she makes her way to join Nathan. His determination starts to run dry when he sees her.
“Hello Nathan.” Isha smiles warmly.
With great difficulty, he nods a nonchalant hello and begins chatting with Claire. Watching him be sociable with everyone except her is driving her crazy. Isha distracts herself by engaging with Daniel who just arrived. She accompanies Daniel to the bar, and while they wait to place an order, Nathan can’t help but notice the attention she is demanding at that bar.
Claire sees Nathan noticing the men flocking to Isha. “And that’s why I keep her around. You can count on free drinks when you are with her.”
“I bet. How was Lady Gaga’s concert?” Nathan tries to hide his desire to protect Isha from the drooling men.
Claire goes on about the concert, what they wore, what songs they danced to and how Liam couldn’t join them. That catches Nathan’s attention. “That’s a bummer he couldn’t join.”
Noticing that Claire is almost done with her drink and filled with inane curiosity about Liam, he directs her to the bar continuing to learn more about Looney Tunes’ life. “Let’s go for a refill, shall we?”
Claire texts Isha. “Boss is buying drinks. Get in on it.”
Isha notices Nathan gathering everyone and walking towards the bar and is irked that he conveniently left her out. Nathan watches Isha and Daniel in the corner of the courtyard engaging in a lively conversation. She is utterly animated talking to Daniel who is thoroughly enjoying listening to her story. Under the soft lighting of the string lights draping the trees above her, she looks radiant. In that moment, he feels a strong urge to be close to her and instinctively walks towards her.
Approaching them, he notices Daniel could use a refill. “Daniel, you should get another. It’s on me.” This conveniently gets rid of him, giving Nathan a few moments with Isha.
Daniel looks over at her. “Want me to grab you another martini?”
Nathan interjects, “Offer’s just for you, Daniel.” He shoots her a smile.
Recognizing Nathan’s humor, Daniel walks away to grab another round for them.
Ignoring his own words of wisdom to stay away from her, he teases Isha with a boyish grin. “Miss me yet?”
Bottled up with a basket of emotions herself, she places her drink on the table next to her, shoots him a furious gaze and forcefully shoves him in the chest. He bounces back with a wider grin covering his face.
Of all the things she wanted to say to him, “Where’s my drink?” escapes her mouth.
Cocking his head to one side complete with a mischievous grin, he asks again, “So you did miss me?”
Infuriated with his banter, she shoves him again. “No!”
Laughing at the game they started, he bounces anothe
r step back. “So, what did you want to talk to me about all week?”
Still furious with him for ignoring her all week, she says, “Nothing.”
She raises her hands to shove him again; he grabs one of them and stops her mid shove. Jolts of electricity pass through her, and she falls completely silent.
Moving closer to her, Nathan says, “We should probably stop ignoring each other.”
She struggles to come up with words and resorts to a gentle nod. Realizing that the game is over he releases his grip on her hand slowly. Excusing herself, she makes a dash to the door, leaving Nathan smiling from ear to ear.
Chapter 8
New Beginnings
A few weeks go by and Isha is feeling like her old self again. It has been hectic with the upcoming site visit to San Diego but she is no longer torturing herself over her chemistry with Nathan. She learns to accept it and recognizes that an innocent chemistry alone cannot destroy a marriage without intent of action coupled with it. Since she has no intentions of ever acting on their chemistry, she vows not to fret over their connection and chooses to focus on the present—a blissful marriage and an exciting career. The dream is still beyond her comprehension, but it no longer torments her. Nathan, on the other hand, feels alive in Isha’s company and welcomes a world where he hasn’t let anyone down yet. His renewed spirit chips away steadily at the years of damage and he slowly starts to feel like himself after a very long time.
Isha can barely wait for her site visit next week. She feels confident in her preparation and is eager to see their hard work come to fruition. At lunch, per their new tradition on Friday, Nathan and the team head out to grab a bite at the neighborhood diner.
On their way back, Nathan catches up with Isha. “Hey, can we chat for a minute?”
Enjoying their budding friendship, she replies, “Of course.”
