Instead, he had thrown himself into his work on the farm and his house. Still, though, he couldn’t remain focused even when he tried. The past few days had seen him making endless mistakes, and he had sworn at his dad threatening to quit farming when Beautiful, the cow, had got her head stuck in the fence for the second time in a week. Still, his father refused to get rid of her.
He knew he had to keep his word and contact Emma, but he still hadn’t worked out what he was going to say. His thoughts were interrupted by his mum rushing to the dairy, yelling his name. For his mum to be running, he knew it was something urgent. She was puffing when she reached him and held her chest.
‘What’s wrong?’ Ben placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. He was worried, the expression on her face told him this wasn’t good news. ‘Catch your breath.’
Jackie let out a shuddering breath. ‘Patrice from the bakery is down in Melbourne at the moment on holiday.’
Ben interrupted his mum. ‘Oh no, has she been involved in an accident?’
Jackie waved a hand at her son. ‘No, let me finish. Anyway, she was reading the paper, and she saw a photo of Emma.’
Ben’s interest immediately was grabbed, and he took hold of his mum’s arm. ‘Why was there a photo of her in the paper?’
‘It was in an article about a young policeman who had been shot and killed a few months back. A Go Fund Me page was set up for the policeman’s wife and children. The wife is using the money to start up a foundation to support families of police officers who have been injured or killed on the job.’
Ben looked at his mum with confusion. ‘And what has this got to do with Em?’ He gestured with his hands for his mum to continue.
‘Well. There was another police officer shot that day. That policewoman was Emma.’
Ben took a step back. ‘What?’
‘I remember seeing it on the news now and thinking about how horrible for those poor police officers’ families. I can’t believe one of them was Emma.’ Jackie shook her head in dismay. ‘What that poor woman has gone through.’
Ben went cold. Emma was a cop, and she had kept it from him. How much more didn’t he know about her? Obviously, a hell of a lot.
Jackie’s voice sliced through his anger. ‘Do you remember hearing about it?’
‘Yeah, I remember it. There was a state funeral for the cop.’ Ben ran a shaky hand through his hair. ‘The rest of it’s fuzzy, though. There were others killed, I think.’
‘It was terribly sad. A baby was orphaned. The poor little thing. Her father killed her mother and then he was killed after he shot that young policeman and Emma.’
Ben remembered it clearly now. The female officer had killed the man in self-defence after he had shot her and the other policeman. Why had she felt the need to keep this information about herself from him? It didn’t make sense. She’d always said she couldn’t tell him about her past like she wanted to confide in him but wasn’t allowed to. Why? Another question burned through him too. Was Zoe the orphaned little baby? There were too many questions he needed to be answered, and there was only one person who could give him what he needed.
Ben kissed his mum on the cheek. ‘I’ve gotta go.’ He raced to his bike, threw his helmet on, and sped off towards town with a cloud of dust flying behind him.
When Emma pulled into her driveway after picking Zoe up from Lilly’s, she was surprised to see Ben pacing back and forth on her verandah. Her heart skipped a beat at the sight of him. However, when he looked up as she opened her car door, she realised he wasn’t happy to see her. His eyes looked stormy, his hair was dishevelled like he’d been running his hand through his hair continuously, and his mouth was set in a firm line—there were no smiles and warm, open arms to greet her with.
She took Zoe out of the car, and placing her on her hip, made her way over to him. He stood blocking her way at the top of the stairs with arms crossed and legs spread apart. She got as close as she could to him, one step below him so he was looking down at her. This close to him, she could feel the tension in the air, but she could now see the disappointment in his eyes. She had misjudged the anger for hurt. Yes, Ben was hurt, and she was the obvious cause of that. ‘What’s wrong?’
He shifted his stance slightly. ‘Why don’t you tell me?’
‘Well, I would, if I knew what I had done. You’re obviously upset about something.’
Ben grunted. ‘Ya think?’
‘Look, if you’re not going to tell me what’s going on, then you need to get out of my way. I need to cook dinner for Zoe.’ Instantly she realised Ben hadn’t even acknowledged Zoe, something he’d never done.
‘When were you going to tell me you were a cop?’
Emma winced. ‘Was a cop. I’m no longer one, but you already know that.’
Ben uncrossed his arms and placed his hands on his hips. ‘Actually, I don’t know. So, do you mind filling me in because I don’t know you at all.’
‘Then you’d better move and come inside. This isn’t a conversation for nosy neighbours to hear.’ She looked over pointedly to her next-door neighbour’s house as the elderly woman who lived there came out her front door.
Ben stepped aside, and Emma walked past him. Her hand shook slightly as she placed her key in the lock, and she willed herself to remain strong and not show how much she was affected by Ben’s news. Inside, she dropped her keys and bag on the breakfast bar and turned around to find Ben right in front of her. She sidestepped him and placed Zoe down with her toys. Zoe was exceptionally quiet, obviously picking up on the tension in the air. ‘Hey, Zo, I think your baby needs her bottle.’ Emma handed Zoe one of her dolls and the doll’s bottle. Zoe immediately pretended to feed her doll and became engrossed in play. When Emma turned around, Ben was watching her. His eyes had lost some of their sharpness.
‘What do you want to know?’ Emma said as she brushed past him, walking into the kitchen.
‘Everything.’ Ben followed her, sitting down on a stool at the breakfast bar.
‘How did you find out?’ she asked as she removed a wok from a drawer with a clang.
‘There’s an article in a Melbourne newspaper about the shooting you were involved in. Patrice from the bakery is down there on holidays and read it.’
Simultaneously Ben and Emma’s phones began ringing. Ben pulled his phone from his pocket and turned it off. He then reached into Emma’s bag and did the same with her phone.
Fear gripped Emma, and she placed the wok she was holding down on the stovetop with shaky hands. ‘Oh my God, everyone’s going to know.’ She braced her hands on either side of the stove and lowered her head. She felt Ben’s presence behind her, felt his hands come up to touch her shoulders.
‘Help me to understand why this is such a big secret. Who cares if everyone knows you used to be a cop and you were shot. What does it matter?’ As he spoke, his breath was hot against her neck.
She squeezed her eyes closed, hoping this was all a bad dream. She’d have to leave Holbrook now. She had no choice. She took an unsteady breath. ‘It matters because I killed a man called Axel Knight, who was Zoe’s father. Today Zoe’s grandfather, Jason Knight, was released on parole, and I have reason to believe he wants revenge. I killed his son, so now he wants me to pay for that. And to top it off, he’s probably going to come after his granddaughter. There’s not a court in Australia who would award him custody, so I think he’ll kidnap her.’
Emma turned around and looked into Ben’s eyes, seeing understanding there. He placed a hand on her back and guided her to a chair at the dining table, sitting her down. He sat down beside her and taking her hand in his, he said, ‘I think you’d better start at the beginning and tell me everything. Don’t leave anything out.’
She recounted everything about that horrific day, the hours, days, weeks, and months afterwards, the gruelling physiotherapy sessions that drained her energy, and the feelings of rejection when Ryan refused to see her in the hospital. Ryan had been begging her to leave th
e police force for years, afraid the very thing that happened to her would indeed eventually happen. He couldn’t cope with the stress of nearly losing her, so he kept his distance so he could handle his own emotional well-being. As she told Ben about Ryan, he had listened, not speaking, but his eyes spoke a thousand words. They were wild with anger for the man.
She told him about the interrogation. As soon as she was out of surgery and conscious, she was questioned repeatedly. She was forced to relive every minute of what happened that day. The questioning and investigation into the shooting felt like it was never going to end and added more stress and turmoil to her life. Recovery from her injuries was slow. Then came the court case for custody of Zoe, the break-up with Ryan, moving to Holbrook, and the worry knowing Jason Knight was on the brink of making parole. She watched his face turn red with anger when she told him about being followed by Stuart Hollows and winced. But, he remained silent, only speaking when she told him about Reg and Daphne being Zoe’s grandparents. ‘I knew there was more to the story there. It all makes sense now.’
She poured her heart out to him, baring her soul, and when she finished, she was exhausted. Ben’s hand never left hers the entire time she spoke, giving her the courage and encouragement she needed to remember all the frightful details. She felt his anger had simmered somewhat. Surely, he could forgive her for not telling him all the grisly details of her past now he knew everything. She prayed he understood why it had been so important not to reveal the truth to anyone.
Ben stood, and for a minute she thought he was leaving, that he couldn’t forgive her, but he walked into the kitchen and poured a glass of water and brought it back to her. She took the glass in her own shaky hands and took a sip of the water. ‘Thanks.’
Ben reoccupied his seat next to her. ‘I think I need something stronger than water.’ He placed his hands out in front of him on the table, clasping them.
‘It’s a lot to take in, I know,’ Emma said, placing her glass down on the table.
‘You’ve been through hell and back, and I get why you couldn’t tell me, but I wouldn’t have told a soul.’
Emma turned in her seat and took his hands in hers. ‘Now I have gotten to know you, I know you would never break my trust. It’s not easy for me to talk about. Everyone close to me knew what was happening. I haven’t had to relive the entire thing out loud to anyone except my counsellor and now you. Besides, if I told you, you would have worried even more than you already were. It’s not your problem to be burdened with.’
Zoe toddled over to Emma and climbed onto her lap. She kissed her on the top of her head. ‘I’m so sorry, sweetie. You must be starving.’ Zoe snuggled into the crock of her arm, rubbing her eyes. ‘And you’re so tired.’
Ben reached out and ruffled Zoe’s head. ‘Hey, possum.’
She smiled at him in return and for the first time, said ‘Ben.’
Ben’s face lit up in the biggest grin. ‘She said my name.’
Emma looked over at how proud he was of Zoe, and it tugged at her heart. ‘It was as clear as day, too. Zoe’s a little delayed in her milestones. When we found her, she was malnourished and was living in filth. She looked like a six-month-old, yet she was ten months old. She’s come so far. She amazes me every day with all the new things she learns.’
‘Well, that makes me even more chuffed that she’s said my name.’ Ben clucked his tongue and touched his finger to Zoe’s nose, which resulted in a giggle from Zoe. ‘Say, I make a mean stir-fry. How about you bath ZoZo, and I whip us up some dinner?’
Emma didn’t know what to say. Ben was exactly what she needed right now. He was such a great friend, and he was intuitive to Zoe and her needs.
When she didn’t say anything, Ben asked, ‘You were about to make a stir-fry, right?’
Emma stood up. ‘Yeah, I was. There’s some chicken in the fridge.’ She walked to the archway leading to the hallway before she turned around. ‘Ben?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Thanks.’
‘No problem.’ He turned and headed to the kitchen, and as she walked to the bathroom with Zoe, she hoped Ben realised she wasn’t thanking him for making dinner but for all his support as well.
Ben was chopping a carrot when there was a knock at the door. He wiped his hand on a tea towel and walked over to the door. He was cautious now with all the knowledge he had heard over the past hour. ‘Who is it?’
‘It’s Senior Sergeant Roy and Constable Fiona Howard.’
Ben opened the door, and the pair walked in. They were both in uniform, and Ben knew immediately this wasn’t a social visit. ‘Emma’s bathing Zoe. What can I do for you?’
Roy moved further inside. ‘It’s okay, we’ll wait. We’ve been trying to contact her on her mobile, but it went straight to the message bank. We were concerned.’
‘We turned our phones off.’ Ben swept a hand through his hair. ‘I know about Emma being a cop and about Jason Knight.’ Ben indicated for Roy to take a seat on the lounge, but he remained standing.
‘Well, you’re not the only person who knows. It’s hot news around the town.’
Ben walked into the kitchen. ‘You don’t mind if I keep cooking, do you? Zoe’s tired and needs some dinner before bed.’
Roy and Fiona followed him. ‘Not at all, go ahead,’ Roy replied.
Ben placed the chicken into the sizzling wok to cook. ‘So, what’s this going to mean for Emma and Zoe. Are you going to increase their protection?’
‘We don’t have the resources. Besides, there’s been no credible threat made against Emma by Jason Knight.’
Ben slammed the wooden spoon he was using to stir the chicken down on the counter. ‘You can’t be serious?’
‘It’s not necessary anyway, I’ve decided to leave Holbrook.’ Everyone turned to see Emma standing in the doorway to the hall with Zoe wrapped in a towel on her hip.
‘Running isn’t the answer, Emma.’ Roy said sternly.
‘We’re not safe here anymore. I don’t care if you see it as running. I see it as protecting Zoe and myself.’
Ben chimed in, ‘What about Reg and Daphne? If you take Zoe away from them, it will destroy them.’
‘Don’t you think I know that,’ she snapped back.
‘Look, Emma, you do what you feel is best for you and Zoe, but I can tell you now, anywhere you go, he’ll find you. He only has to file for visitation rights of Zoe, and he’ll know where you are. He’d be stupid to hurt you in any way because it will only harm him in the long run. He’ll lose any right to see Zoe or gain custody of her.’
Emma bit down on her lip. ‘I don’t know what I should do anymore.’
Fiona joined the conversation. ‘If you run, you’ll be risking your own foster care of Zoe. You will be removing her from her home. You’re both settled here, and from all the phone calls we’ve been receiving, everyone is worried sick about you. The entire town will be looking out for you and Zoe. Holbrook’s probably the safest place for you to be right now. There isn’t one person in this town who’s going to allow Jason Knight or one of his thugs anywhere near you or Zoe. You have my word.’
‘I’ll think about it. I have to dress Zoe. I’ll let you know what I decide.’ She turned and headed towards Zoe’s bedroom.
Roy looked at Fiona. ‘I think that’s our cue to leave.’ Both police officers walked towards the front door, and as they walked out, Roy shouted over his shoulder, ‘And for God sake, turn your phones on.’
Ben shut the door and turned both his and Emma’s phones on, which buzzed immediately with messages and missed calls. By the time he had served the chicken stir-fry into bowls and placed it on the table, Emma had returned and was placing Zoe in her high chair.
Sitting across from Emma, he watched as she leaned over and smelled the stir fry. ‘Mmm, this looks and smells amazing. Thank you.’
‘Tuck in.’ He watched with quiet satisfaction as Zoe took a piece of broccoli out of her bowl and ate it. ‘Zoe looks like she’s enjoying
it.’
Emma smiled. ‘She loves stir-fry.’ She ate a mouthful. ‘Oh my goodness, this is amazing. Did your mum teach you how to cook?’
Ben swallowed. ‘Yeah, she taught all of us to cook. Will’s not too bad of a cook, but my sister, Lucy, is terrible. She’d burn a pot of water.’
Emma laughed and fed Zoe a spoonful of chicken she had cut up into smaller pieces.
Ben put his fork down. ‘So, are you really going to leave?’
Emma shrugged, ‘I don’t know. Zoe is settled, and I feel like this would be a wonderful community to raise her in. I love it here, too.’
‘I’d miss you both.’
‘We’d miss you, too.’ She wouldn’t meet his eyes as she spoke.
‘There’s us, too. We haven’t had a chance to talk about our kiss.’ Ben felt uncomfortable with the subject matter, but they seriously needed to work out where they went to from here. He wanted so badly to reach over and kiss her now that it hurt. His body physically ached to touch her. What did that mean?
Emma twirled a Hokkien noodle around her fork. ‘I don’t even know if I’m staying, Ben, and to be perfectly honest, it’s the last thing I have on my mind. I have so much more I have to consider.’
‘You’re right. I want you to know but—’ He was interrupted by Emma’s phone ringing. ‘You should get that.’
Scraping her chair back, Emma retrieved her phone frowning as she looked down at it. ‘Hi, Reg.’
Ben couldn’t hear what was being said, but Emma’s expression changed quickly as she covered her mouth with her hand. ‘Oh, no. I’m on my way. Don’t be silly, of course, I’m coming. I’ll be there in five minutes.’ She ended the call, tears in her eyes. ‘Daphne’s had another stroke. I have to go.’ She went to lift Zoe out of her high chair when Ben placed a hand on her arm.
‘I’ll stay with Zoe. You go.’
‘No, where I go, Zoe goes.’
Ben knew better to argue with her, he wouldn’t win. He grabbed her keys off the counter. ‘Well, I’m coming, too. Where you and Zoe go, I go.
All of You Page 16
