Zero Regret

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Zero Regret Page 20

by Autumn Jones Lake


  “As our VP, Shadow knows better.” Steer nudges Shadow’s lifeless body with the toe of his boot. “Or he should.”

  Lilly

  I know better than to get involved or try to stop the fight, but I can’t stand seeing Z get hurt.

  Well, he’s the one doing the hurting. So, I guess I don’t like him in danger of being hurt.

  I can’t look away though. It doesn’t seem right.

  “He’s got this,” Teller assures me with complete calm.

  “I see that.”

  “It’s about time someone checked that asshole,” Lala mutters next to me. She sneaks a quick look at Teller, like she’s afraid she’s going to get in trouble for saying something against a brother.

  Teller doesn’t acknowledge the comment. Instead, he draws me closer and leans down. “You all right?”

  “I’m fine.” I hold up a hand and realize I’m still shaking. “Well, maybe a little freaked.”

  He nods. “I’m glad Charlotte’s not here tonight.”

  “Yeah, kinda wish I’d stayed home too,” I mutter. The guys close in a circle around Z and Shadow until we can’t see them.

  I push forward and Teller pulls me back. “I’m taking you home.”

  “I’ll take her,” the kid everyone calls “Prospect” offers.

  “No, she’s with me,” Teller insists. He nods to the club girls huddled together by the bar. “Get the van and take them home or wherever, but they need to go.”

  “You got it.”

  “Teller, I can’t leave. I have to know—”

  “Lilly, don’t argue with me.” Teller’s calm, grave tone completely freaks me out, but he seizes my arm and pulls me toward the front door. “Where’s your car?”

  The shouting from the fight gets louder and I make another attempt to free myself from Teller’s grasp. “We can’t leave him!”

  “Murphy’s got his back. Trust me, Z will be pissed if I don’t get you home.”

  Arguing with him seems pointless. He’s got an iron grip and isn’t afraid to use it. Plus, down where I don’t want to acknowledge it, I know he’s right and the last thing I want to do is make Z’s life difficult.

  “Z knows how to handle himself, Lilly,” Teller says once we’re on the road.

  “What’s going to happen?” I ask.

  “To Shadow? For touching you? That beating, for starters. Anything more than that, you don’t need to know.”

  I’d be offended or argue that it is my business, but I already understand how the club operates. If Z wants to tell me, he will. It’s not fair to press Teller for information he’s not allowed to share.

  “I need to see Chance,” I whisper.

  “He’s probably asleep.”

  “I know. But I need to see him.”

  “Okay,” Teller agrees.

  Heidi answers the door in her pajamas and yawns. “What’s going on? Why are you back so early?”

  She glances past us and seems to wake right up. “Where’s Blake?”

  “At the clubhouse.” Teller leans down and kisses his sister’s cheek. “Kids okay?”

  “Everyone’s fine. They went to bed a while ago.” Her gaze swings between us. “Right after you called, Lilly. What’s going on?”

  “Nothing, I just wanted to check on Chance.”

  Heidi stares me down for a few seconds. “Go ahead.”

  They share a few tense words while I rush upstairs.

  Z

  “That was some fucked-up shit, brother.” Murphy squeezes my shoulder. “You okay?”

  “Where’s Lilly?”

  “Teller took her home as soon as it went down.” He glances over his shoulder. “Prospect offered to take her, but given the situation, we weren’t comfortable with that.”

  “Thank you.” At least I know they always have my back.

  He pulls out his phone and taps out a text. “Lettin’ him know you’re okay, so she’s not freaking out.”

  “I’ll call her in a bit. Tell him to get his ass back here.”

  “You got it.”

  “It’s gonna be a long night.”

  The club’s doctor shows up. There’s one thing we’re missing upstate—a crooked doctor who shows up to clean up our non-reportable injuries.

  Steer and Jigsaw moved Shadow into a side room up front with a cot and some medical supplies, the club’s unofficial exam room. I’ve been in it once or twice myself in the past.

  “Z.” Rooster touches my shoulder. “You need to have your leg looked at.”

  Funny, with all the adrenaline from the fight I forgot all about the long cut. I glance down. Blood soaks my jeans on either side of where Shadow sliced.

  “Fuck.” Now it hurts. “Make sure that asshole’s gonna live first, then send Doc down to my room.”

  “Z,” he protests.

  “I’m fine.”

  “I got him, Rooster,” Murphy says. He butts his big head under my arm and has me lean on him until we get to my room.

  “I’m fine.”

  “You look like you’re gonna pass out.”

  “Fuck you.”

  “You kiss your baby momma with that mouth?”

  I chuckle as he pushes open my door and helps me into the room. “Every inch of her.”

  While I drop into a chair, Murphy searches the bedroom before moving on to the bathroom.

  “You could at least shut the door.” I shout.

  “Why? You’ve seen my dick before.”

  “Which is why I’m asking you to shut the door.”

  “I’m not taking a piss, dumbass. I’m looking for something.”

  “What the fuck for?”

  “Something to clean that with. You want your leg to get infected and fall off? You can’t ride then.”

  “When did you get so annoying?”

  “I can only find some tiny finger Band-Aids.”

  “Sorry, wasn’t planning to get sliced up tonight.”

  He stops in the bathroom doorway, shaking a small green bottle at me. “Seriously, Z? Mint-flavored lube? I expect better from you.”

  I rumble with laughter, which eases the pain in my leg a bit. “That’s not mine, you dick. It was in the room when I took it.”

  He flips the bottle over. “Guess that explains the late-nineties expiration date.”

  “Why don’t you give it a taste test? See if it still works.”

  He flips me a middle finger and tosses the bottle in the trashcan.

  “Go wash your hands after touching that, ya perv.”

  He returns and throws a towel to me. “Put some pressure on that before you bleed to death.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” I grumble, wadding up the towel and pressing it down over the cut. “Motherfucker.”

  As he’s finishing his search for who-the-hell-knows what, someone knocks on the door. “You think you can get that for me, princess?” I yell.

  Before Murphy can get to the door, it opens and Teller slips in.

  “You could wait until I say come in.”

  “I thought you did.” His scowl deepens. “Are you really busting my balls right now?”

  “When would be a better time?”

  “The adrenaline drop is making him cranky,” Murphy explains. “You bring some food like I asked? He’s lost a lot of blood.”

  Teller pulls a Snickers bar out of his cut and tosses it to me.

  “I said food, not candy,” Murphy says.

  “My healthy food options were kind of limited at this hour,” Teller says as he flings another Snickers bar at Murphy’s head. He tosses me a granola bar next. “Best I could find.”

  “This’ll do. Is Lilly okay?”

  Teller shrugs and takes the chair across from me. “She was scared, but she didn’t argue with me when I told her it was time to go. Once I told her you were okay, she calmed down. Didn’t give me any grief about not coming back with me. Warned her it might be a late night.”

  “Thanks.”

  He sits back and blows ou

t a breath. “First time I’ve been happy Charlotte couldn’t make it down.”

  “No kidding.”

  “What are you going to do?” Teller asks.

  Murphy growls and makes a slashing motion with his hand. “Gut that motherfucker.”

  “He’s gotta go,” I agree. “But this can’t look like upstate coming in to clean house. I already probably overstepped by getting between him and Serena.”

  “Fuck him,” Teller says. “This club isn’t about that. You had every right.”

  “He’s right,” Murphy agrees. “The only ones complaining about it were Shadow and Smoke.”

  Teller sits forward. “Smoke needs to go too.”

  “One execution at a time, brother.”

  “How long is Doc gonna take?” Murphy grumbles, glancing at the door. “Get your pants off and let’s clean that up.”

  “Why you tryin’ to get me naked, bro?”

  “For fuck’s sake.” Teller rolls his eyes. “I think he’s trying to save you from getting an infection.”

  “You two have no sense of humor.”

  Murphy flips me off. “Watching one of your best friends almost get stabbed in the chest tends to kill a sense of humor.”

  “He didn’t almost stab me.”

  “You’ve seen your leg, right?” Teller asks.

  “Let’s take a look.” I stand and unbutton my pants.

  “Should I grab that mint lube?” Murphy jokes.

  “Only if you’re planning to blow me.”

  Someone else knocks and Murphy answers, opening the door wider to allow the doctor in.

  Teller pushes himself out of his chair and stops in front of me. “I’ll go assess the mood out there.”

  “Thanks.”

  Murphy raises his eyebrows at me, silently asking if I want him to stay or go. “Go ahead. When I’m done here, we’re all sitting down at the table.”

  “We’ll pass that around,” Teller promises.

  “It’s been a while, Z,” the doc says. He sets his bag on the table. “Let me wash up. I’ll be right back.”

  While the doc isn’t one of my favorite people, he’s actually good at what he does. He’s in the bathroom for a while, vigorously scrubbing up. When he returns, he pulls several pristine white towels out of his bag along with an unopened sleeve of tools.

  “You’re lucky this wasn’t deeper.”

  “So, it’s not as bad as it looks?”

  “Nah, you can lose up to a pint of blood without any severe effects.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind for next time.”

  After cleaning up the cut, he declares it’s worse than he thought and says he needs to stitch it up.

  “I don’t care what it looks like, doc. Just make sure my leg doesn’t fall off.” Fucking Murphy with his stupid jokes.

  When the doc finishes, he pulls out two amber prescription bottles. “Painkiller. Please don’t drink alcohol while taking these.”

  “Yeah, okay.” I motion for him to hand over the bottle. “What else?”

  “Antibiotics.” He smirks at me. “To keep your leg from falling off.”

  I snatch the bottles out of his hand. “See Hustler on your way out. He’ll get you paid.”

  “Call me if it shows any signs of infection or you have any questions.”

  “I will. Thanks, doc.”

  After he leaves, I grab my cell phone and stretch out on the bed.

  Lilly answers on the first ring.

  “Z! Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine, but I’m going to be here the rest of the night.”

  She sighs. “I figured as much.”

  “Are you all right?”

  She coughs, making me wish I was there to check her over, assess whatever damage Shadow did. “Yes.”

  “Tell me what happened. From the beginning. Just don’t use any names.”

  Her soft laughter comes through the phone, then abruptly stops. Probably about the time she realized I wasn’t joking.

  By the time, she finishes, I’m burning with rage.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Z

  Freshly stitched, bandaged, dressed in clean pants, and buzzing from a painkiller-antibiotic cocktail, I make my way down to the chapel.

  The main room’s brightly lit, but mostly empty.

  Except for a few faces I wasn’t expecting to see tonight.

  Murphy lifts his chin when he sees me. “Why didn’t you call us? I would’ve come—”

  “I’m fine.”

  Teller nods to Rock, Wrath, and Dex. “Look who showed up.”

  My throat tightens. “What are you doing here? It’s the middle of the fuckin’ night.”

  Wrath grins. “Rock and I had a bet going, which one of you’d get stabbed first, and I won.”

  “Dick.” I hold out my hand and he pulls me in, gently—well, gentle for Wrath—slapping my back.

  “You really thought Z would get stabbed before Teller?” Murphy scratches his beard. “My money definitely woulda been on Teller. I’ve been itching to stab him for years.”

  “I think nailing his sister hurts more,” Dex says.

  Teller ignores them and glares at Rock. “Really?”

  Rock shrugs. “You love runnin’ that mouth of yours.”

  After we’re finished busting on each other, Rock squeezes my shoulder. “You all right?”

  “I’ll live.”

  “Lilly okay?”

  “I just talked to her. She’s fine.”

  “I’m so sorry, brother. I never…” He shakes his head. “This should never happen in our clubhouses.”

  It shouldn’t. But if I think about it, this kind of trouble’s been brewing down here for years. Sway’s always run his club a little rougher than we run ours. Looser.

  Now he’s got a bullet in the head and I’ve been sliced open by a brother.

  Obviously, something needs to change.

  “This was bound to happen,” Murphy says, echoing my thoughts. “Remember the first time we brought Hope down here and some hang-around tried to grab her?”

  Rock’s jaw tightens. “Yeah.”

  “You pounded the shit out of him, and that was the end of it,” I remind Murphy. “The fucker didn’t pull a fucking knife on you. And Shadow did more than grab Lilly’s ass.”

  Murphy rolls his eyes. “That’s what I’m trying to say. I’m not surprised it’s escalated to this point.”

  Wrath’s silent but watching me with an intent expression.

  I blow out a breath, not really in the mood for him to mock me right now. “What?”

  “How do you plan to handle it, Prez?” he asks with absolutely no hint of sarcasm to the question.

  “You know what has to happen. I can’t let this slide or I might as well call Priest now and tell him I’m heading home.”

  Rock nods. “You’ve definitely been tangled into a knot here, but I have faith you’ll straighten it out.”

  “Thanks, Rock.”

  Rooster steps out of the office and nods at us. “Everyone’s waiting in the chapel, Prez.”

  Rock shoots a smile my way, like he’s proud to hear someone else referring to me as Prez.

  Steer steps out of the chapel and closes the door behind him. He shakes hands with Rock, Wrath, and Dex while thanking them for coming down.

  At least that’s a good sign.

  When I first started hanging around the club, Sway was a member upstate. A few years later, after some deaths and incarcerations, Rock, Wrath, and I not-so-gently helped the old president retire. Sway made the wise choice to break ties. With the blessing of National and a few other brothers, he founded the downstate charter.

  That’s the nice, neat version, the full version’s a little bloodier. Basically, we’re brothers, but there’s always an ounce of animosity between our two charters that runs deep. Old wounds that healed but still ache under certain conditions.

  Key members of my club showing up could either be interpreted as support or an
invasion.

  Thankfully, everyone seems to welcome the upstate members tonight.

  Rooster and I are eventually left alone outside the chapel.

  “How’s Shadow?” I hope to fuck the prick didn’t die while the doc was fixing me up. I want to be the one to end that motherfucker.

  “Alive.” He cocks his head. “I’m behind you, Z. No games. No angles. What went down was wrong and I have your back.”

  I hold out my hand and he shakes it quickly. “Appreciate that, Rooster. You’ve been a true brother since I’ve been down here.” I glance toward the hallway. “And I don’t know what would’ve happened if you hadn’t walked up on them tonight.”

  “Guess it’s a good thing I was coming out to look for another girl for my three-way.”

  Laughing, I shake my head. “You could’ve kept that to yourself. Makes it less heroic now.”

  The playful smile slides off his face. “I’m nobody’s hero, brother.”

  I’m pretty sure Lilly disagrees, but I nod and thank him again before going inside.

  The somber tone of the room washes over me as I step over the threshold.

  I take my place at the head of the table and look around the room. There’s no need to bang the gavel or even raise my voice. I have everyone’s attention.

  “I’ve spent more than twenty years wearing our skull and crown on my back. This club is a brotherhood. Our brotherhood. Our family. We always have each other’s backs. That’s how this works. Otherwise, we might as well be any other band of assholes wearing leather and riding a hog.”

  “Amen, brother,” someone says. Murmurs of agreement fill the room, but I don’t stop to acknowledge the comment.

  “The Lost Kings’ patch means everything to me. My brothers and this club mean everything to me. Doesn’t matter if it’s Upstate, Downstate, Mississippi, Washington, we’re all brothers bound by a common thread. It might not always feel that way. Priest coming down here and imposing his will prickles against everything we are. Some days our trust in the brotherhood can be tested.”

  Now the guys are looking at each other. As if I’m about to scold them.

  “Our common desire to live outside of the rules of regular society doesn’t mean we’re savages without honor. The code we live by might be skewed by society’s standards, but it’s our guiding compass.”

 
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