by May Gordon
Setting the photo down, I grab my bag and head out of my office. I bump into my new boss, Jeff Anders. “I’m sorry, Mr. Anders.” I back away from him quickly. He’s been giving me the creeps since he started working here.
“Alice, I was just coming to see you. How about a drink after work?” He asks as he flicks back his greasy hair. I guess some women would find him handsome since he’s tall with blond hair and blue eyes and dresses like he belongs on a GQ magazine, but I don’t see it.
“No thanks, Mr. Anders. I should really get home.” I maneuver around him, but he stops me by grabbing my arm.
“Oh, come on, Alice. I’m sure your mom can watch your daughter.” Jeff says referring to Ruth.
“Sorry, Mr. Anders, but its Taco Tuesday. I can’t miss that.” I move out of his grip and walk quickly to my car.
I get into Royce’s Charger and drive home. I’ve kept it this whole time because it’s a little piece of him. Rowan is another. Royce helped me in a lot of ways even after his death. With the money he left, I renovated my house since it was older, and I wanted a safe place for Rowan to grow up. I also went back to school to finish my design degree. Aside from that I haven’t used much of his money, and there was a lot of it. Pulling in my driveway, I see the light on in my house. I knew I would be working late so Ruth picked up Rowan from school. Walking inside, I see the Commander and Rowan both wearing aprons and making dinner.
“Hi, Mommy,” Rowan yells from the counter.
“Hi, sweetheart. How was your day?” Michael calls from the kitchen.
“Good, I finally finished that hotel design.” I put my keys and bag in the entryway and walk to the counter. Taco ingredients are everywhere.
“Alice, I thought I heard you.” Ruth comes out of the laundry room and I roll my eyes when I see she’s carrying my basket.
“Ruth, you don’t need to do my laundry,” I tell her yet again. She’s always helping.
“I know, dear, but you’ve been so busy lately I wanted to,” she says while giving me a hug.
“Mommy, Grandma and I planted some new flowers in the garden after school,” Rowan says with a smile.
I walk around the counter and give her a kiss and hug. “That sounds fun, honey.”
“We also picked some flowers and took them to Daddy,” she beams up at me.
“Well, I’m sure he loved them,” I assure her while stroking her curly blonde locks, identical to mine. Rowan knows all about Royce. I have pictures of us all over the house from before he was deployed, and she even has his military portrait beside her bed. I take her to Royce’s grave a lot. I wanted her to have a place to visit him. She’s only five, but she understands her Daddy lives in heaven. She prays to him every night, and so do I.
“I still think he would’ve liked that bottle of whiskey I bought,” Michael says. Royce did like his whiskey.
“Hush, Michael. I think Royce would prefer Rowan’s flowers over that any day,” Ruth chimes in as she sets the table. I laugh and help her.
“Grandpa, next time we can bring Daddy your wicky,” Rowan tells the him.
He chuckles at her. “Whiskey, dear.”
We place everything on the table and sit down.
“I’m glad you finished it. You’ve been working way too hard, dear,” Michael says with a squeeze of my hand.
“Me too. I was really feeling overworked near the end. I’m just not loving my job like I use too,” I say honestly. Lately it’s been unbearable, and with Jeff there now it’s uncomfortable.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Ruth says sympathetically.
“Maybe you need a change?” Michael suggests.
“Mommy should come to class with me!” Rowan tells us energetically and we all laugh until Michael’s phone rings.
“Grandpa! You know the rules! No phones at dinner,” Rowan chastises him.
“Sorry, dear, but this must be important.” He kisses the top of her head and leaves the room to answer it.
“Alice, I was thinking this weekend we could have a girl’s day. I have a coupon for that new nail salon,” Ruth gushes. That sounds like what I need right about now.
“I want to have nails like the pulups we picked,” Rowan tells Ruth.
“Tulips, Dear, and I don’t see why you can’t.”.
Michael comes back into the room. His eyes are wide and he looks like he’s going to be sick.
“Honey are you all right?” Ruth asks concerned.
Michael sits down, obviously rattled. “Michael?” I grab his hand. When he looks at me I feel it in my core. Something is seriously wrong.
He’s quiet for a moment, his eyes never leaving mine. He seems to be contemplating something.
“A longtime friend of mine was injured in battle. He’s being shipped to Fort Carson for recovery.” He sounds sad, and worried.
“I’m so sorry to hear that.” I know how hard it is for him.
“Oh Michael, that’s terrible! What do you need from us?” Ruth asks, always being the support in this family.
“I’m going to see him tomorrow, see what I can do to help.” He still looks lost.
“Grandpa, I’m sorry your friend is hurt. I can pick him some flowers,” Rowan says.
He gives her a sad smile. “I’m sure he would love that.”
“Hey,” I take hold of his hand again. “You always told me to have faith, that even if it seems hopeless that faith will keep you going.”
I see his eye shimmer with tears. “Thanks, sweetheart.”
We continue eating dinner, but there’s a sad cloud above us now. For some reason, I feel like he’s keeping something from us, but I think it’s because Rowan is here. I just hope his friend is ok.
Chapter 3
Royce
I stare out the window that looks over Fort Carson. It’s been almost six years since I was here, but it hasn’t changed. I’ve been going crazy. It took three days to get here. Once we stepped off the plane I had every intention to see Alice, even if I was dirty, smelly, and overgrown. Next thing I know I was stuck with a sedative and woke up in a well-secured hospital room. They won’t let me leave. The doctors said they needed to assess me and I needed to be debriefed. I understand that, what I don’t is why I can’t see Alice first. I got worked up, and they had to sedate me again, so I decided to play by their rules. The sooner I get this shit over with the sooner I can see Alice. It’s been two days since I arrived here. I’m cleaned up, and the doctors have looked me over. I’m at my limit.
I need Alice. Just knowing she’s so close makes me crazy. At least I hope she still is. I have no idea where she might be, how she is, or who she’s with. All the unanswered questions make me fucking nuts. There’s a knock on the door, and it opens as Commander Fisher walks in. I haven’t laid eyes on him since my unit left on that last mission. He looks older, fuller, but still in great shape. Damn, it’s good to see him. He’s been like a father to me, to many guys in our unit.
“Welcome home, son.” The Commander sounds choked up, and if I talk now I know I’ll sound the same. I walk to him and give him a hug. “Damn you, Havoc for putting me through this.”
I laugh at him. “Won’t happen again, sir.”
He pulls back and gives me a once over. “You look good for being a POW for the last six years.”
“I followed your routine. Body weight workout three times a day, every day.” I say with a smile.
“Told you it would save your life one day,” he smirks. “Let’s sit and talk.” We head to the couch in my room and sit. “I read the report Commander Johnathan sent me. So, the others are really dead?”
“I’m sorry, Commander. They’re gone.” I shake my head, sadness overcoming me.
I hear him sigh. I know he must’ve had his hopes up after finding me alive, but I was the only survivor.
“Sir, you’ve obviously been debriefed, and the doctors have checked me out. When can I be released? I need to see Alice,” I eagerly tell him.
He hesitates b
efore saying, “I’m told you’re dehydrated, and a little malnourished but in rather good health now, but you obviously suffered a lot during your years of captivity,” he replies, sidestepping my question.
“Yeah, but I’m fine,” I reassure him. “Now I want to see Alice,” I demand. I’ve been more than patient over the last few days. Hell it’s been years since I saw her. Again, he seems tight lipped. Darkness starts to pool in my gut. “What’s wrong? Is Alice okay?” I stand and start to panic.
“Calm down, son. Alice is fine,” he tells me. I let out a sigh and sit back down.
“Then what are you avoiding?”
“It’s been almost six years. You’ve been a POW and I’m worried about your state of mind. You just escaped less than a week ago. I want to make sure you’re all right.” I understand his concern. He’s seen the worst of PTSD from other soldiers.
“I would never hurt Alice. I love her,” I practically yell at him, probably not helping to prove myself.
“I know that, but things have changed Royce.” He says then seems like he regrets his words.
My heart goes to my throat. and I see red. “Is it a man? Who is he? Tell me now!” I’m yelling at him again, showing my state of mind isn’t normal at this point. I’m different and I know, but all I can think of is getting to Alice and killing that son of a bitch she’s with now.
“Royce, it’s not what you think, but she does have someone in her life. You need to understand that.” He’s talking in riddles.
“So, she hasn’t moved on?” I ask. I will kill anyone who prevents my second chance with her. She’s mine. Regardless of our time apart, or if she did move on. It doesn’t fucking matter.
The Commander shakes his head. “Royce, she has never taken off that ring you gave her. She’s kept you present in her life daily. She would’ve never moved on.” I relax at his words. My love for her has only strengthened during the separation.
“Then why won’t you let me see her? I know I’m not the same, but I would never hurt her. Keeping me away from Alice is only making it worse Sir.” I hope he hears the desperation in my voice.
He takes a deep breath. “Royce, she doesn’t know you’re alive yet.”
“Why the fuck not?” I demand.
“When I got the call they’d found you I had no idea what condition you were in, physically or mentally. I didn’t want to get her hopes up only for them to come crashing down again. She’s been through enough, and she would not survive losing you a second time.” I know he’s right for not telling her yet.
Sitting back down, I take a deep breath to try and relax.
“How did she handle my death?” I hate the hurt I must‘ve caused her.
“Not well. Ruth and I tried to help as much as we could.”
“Who’s Ruth?” I questioned.
“My wife,” he smiles wide. “She moved in next to Alice not long after you were deployed. After your death I retired and focused all my time on Alice. Ruth helped as well, and we’ve been married almost three years.” He sounds happy.
“Congratulations, sir, and I can’t thank you enough for all you must’ve done for Alice. Ruth too.” I’m glad she had support. “But I need to see her, please.” I’m not against begging. At this point I’m willing to drop to my knees and beg him to let me see her.
He exhales a long breath. “Okay, I’ll tell her tonight and bring her in the morning.”
I feel hope bloom in my heart. Just knowing Alice will be in my arms soon lets me breathe a little easier.
Alice. My Alice. We’ll be together again.
Chapter 4
Alice
“Alice, Mr. Brown was ecstatic about your designs for his hotel. Good job!” Mr. Anders says from my office door. I wonder why he waits until everyone has left before coming to see me. Just another reason why he makes me uncomfortable.
“Thank you, Mr. Anders.” I say over my shoulder as I shut off my computer and pack up my things. I feel him come inside and sit on my desk, completely invading my personal space.
“How about we go out for a drink?” He asks while stroking my arm. I step back, giving him a glare.
“Mr. Anders, I’m married.” It’s not the full truth. I had every intention of marrying Royce, and in my heart, I’m his forever, and have no interest in other men.
“He’s dead.” Mr. Anders says like I forgot.
“That doesn’t matter!” I snap at him. “I’d appreciate it if you stop inviting me out because it’s always going to be no, sir.” I gather my things and walk out. Suddenly I feel him grip my shoulder and push me into a wall. I gasp in shock.
He gets in my face and promises, “Alice, you will be mine. If you want to keep your job, you’ll go out with me tomorrow.” He’s mad, his breath hitting me.
In a panic, I push him off me. It must’ve taken him off guard because he stumbles back, and I race to my car. I don’t need this job that badly. Tomorrow I’m calling in and quitting. I start the Charger and drive home.
By the time I arrive, I’ve calmed down. Entering my house, I find Rowan and the Commander colouring at the kitchen table.
“Hey guys. How was your day?” I put my stuff down and give them both a kiss on the check.
“Mommy, I learned flowers eat the sun.” Rowan says with a toothy smile.
“Really? That’s interesting.”
“I thought so too,” Michael chimes in.
“How is your friend?” I ask him.
He goes stock still, like I just accused him of murder.
Ruth enters the room from the back patio. Her eyes are red and puffy.
“Ruth, what’s wrong?” I walk over and hug her, concerned because she’s obviously been crying.
“Nothing, honey, just feeling weepy.” She says unconvincingly. “I’m going to take Rowan to my place and do some baking. Is it ok if she sleeps over?”
“Yay! Sleep over at Grandma’s,” Rowan cheers.
I feel a whirlwind of questions swirling around my head. I know she’s avoiding my question, but I let it go. “Sure Ruth. Thanks.”
She grabs Rowan’s already packed bag. “You ready, honey?” She asks Rowan.
“Yes, Grandma. Thanks for colouring with me Grandpa.” She hugs her Grandpa and then Ruth and she are out the door.
“Michael, what’s going on?” I sit at the table again and notice he looks distracted.
“Alice, I need to tell you something.”
“Oh God. What happened? Are you and Ruth divorcing? Are you sick? Is that why she was crying?” I fire off questions.
“Hell Alice, of course we’re not!” He’s outraged by the thought and I relax a little. “And I’m not sick!”
“Then what’s going on Michael?” He grasps my hands and squeezes tightly.
“Royce is alive.”
I look at him like a deer in headlights, trying to process his words because they make no sense to me.
“Wh-what?”
“Royce. He’s alive. He’s been a POW this whole time.” His voice is shaking.
“Wh-what?” I repeat since I don’t know what else to say. I can’t process this. I don’t understand.
“He’s been at Fort Carson the last three days. For the most part he’s okay, but he wants to see you tomorrow.” Oh god. This is real. I feel my eyes watering.
“He’s alive?” The tears overflow now.
“Yes, sweetheart. He really is.” I see Michael tearing up as well.
“I can’t believe this,” I whisper in shock. Then I start sobbing, and so does he.
Chapter 5
Alice
I’m standing outside Royce’s suite on the Fort Carson Medical floor. It hasn’t changed since I dropped him off all those years ago. I’m fidgeting with my hair and smoothing down my dress. It’s been almost six years and I’ve had a baby in that time. I definitely put on weight after Rowan, at least twenty pounds that refuses to go away. Will he still find me attractive? Does he still love me? Will he be happy about being
a father?
“Alice, you look beautiful. And he won’t care what you look like. Trust me when I say he’ll be more than happy just to see you.” Michael says while resting his hand on my shoulder. I nod. “I’ll be just outside the door. It won’t be locked, you can walk out whenever you want, or just yell if you need help.”
“He wouldn’t hurt me.” I state, outraged at the assumption.
“I know, sweetheart, but PTSD can change a man. Just be careful,” he urges.
“Okay, I will,” I assure him. “When can I take him home?”
Michael gives me a long look. “If you feel comfortable, today. But you have to be sure.”
“All right. Thank you.” I give him a hug before he steps aside. I stare at the door for a second, trying to prepare myself. For what I don’t know, ultimately my need to see him out weighs my insecurities.
Opening the door, I step inside. Royce is looking out the large window. My entry makes him turn and my breath catches. It’s him. It’s really him. His eyes widen and his whole body goes tense. He’s thinner, but still muscular. Scars litter his arms and there’s one over his eyebrow. Regardless, he’s still my Royce.
He places a hand over his heart gripping his shirt. “My God, Alice, you’re more beautiful than I remembered.” His voice is shaky. I burst into tears and we go to each other. He wraps his strong arms around me as I sob into his chest. He strokes my hair, and tightens his grip on me.
