I unintentionally gasp as his breath catches, and then his hand inches higher. I lean back against the mirror. “Alex… what are you ….”
I drift off as his fingers touch between my legs without slipping into me, merely resting just outside. I bite down on my lip as every single one of my nerve endings blaze with fiery heat and every thought inside my head dissipates
“I can’t take this anymore,” he says in a breathy whisper as he leans in closer, his eyes glossed over. “I want to be angry with you, but I can’t stop thinking about how I need to make you mine again and how I really don’t deserve you for everything I’ve done to you—all the lies I’ve told.” His lips hover above my mouth as his chest lines up with mine, burning me with ecstasy and driving me crazy. I grip onto the countertops, struggling to cling onto reality.
“How do you think I feel?” I groan. Hold on, Gemma. Don’t let go. You need a clear head… clear… “I never know what you’re thinking… what you want… what’s the truth… what’s right and what’s…” I drift off as his fingers slip inside me. My body bows into him and the towel slips loose before falling to my waist, my bare chest pressing against him.
His fingers start to gently move inside me. “Just trust me okay?”
I shake my head because I don’t entirely trust him or myself and what I’m feeling, but I don’t argue because I can’t. I want him to keep doing what he’s doing, feeling me, touching me, diminishing the void inside me. Giving me the human connection that I crave.
His fingers keep working as I struggle to breathe. I clutch so tightly onto the counter that the edge stabs into my palms. Finally I let go and grab onto his shoulders at the same time his hands slide around my back. He pushes on it, forcing me to move closer to him.
My body arches into him so he can touch me even more, even though he’s already touching me all over. It feels like there’s something missing in the midst of it all. Another connection I’m being deprived of. Then his lips come down on mine and I understand. I needed him to kiss me in order to breathe, function, and be whole again. The entire time the electricity was gone I felt so out of whack, so incomplete, and incredibly wrong. I need Alex, however the question is, do I need him because I want him or is it because of the electricity and whatever’s causing it?
I shove the thought out of my head as his fingers push me into blissfulness. As I scream out, he trails kisses down my jawline, my neck, and my breast; sucking hard on my nipple before returning his mouth to mine. He kisses me fiercely. Forcefully. Until my lips are going to bruise. My body and mind unwind and for a moment everything seems perfect. Complete. Whole.
Then I start to regain my composure, however, I don’t want to just yet. I want to lose control, drift away, feel every emotion amplify and leave.
I reach for the bottom of Alex’s shirt as I pull back my lips.
“What are you doing?” he asks blinking, his lips swollen as he slips his fingers out of me.
I don’t say a word as I start to tug his shirt over his head.
He opens his mouth to argue, but then clamps his jaw shut, deciding against it before he then rips his shirt over his head. My hands glide up the front of his lean muscles, trace the lines of the golden flames trimming a ring, the Mark of the Keepers branding the side of his ribcage. He crashes his lips into mine and steals the breath out of me. I writhe my body against him as I slide my hand to the top of his pounding heart. The feeling of it hitting my palm fuels me with desire and I reach for the button off his jeans. He jerks his lips away and the lack of control in his eyes is undeniable. Like the first time we had sex when he lost control of what he was doing. I’m losing control, too, and I don’t give a shit. I want, no, need him to be inside me now, and I don’t even completely understand why. It’s like I’m drowning in emptiness and being with him is the only way to save me.
I undo his button and slowly unzip his jeans. He moans, a deep, husky utterance of desire. There’s a pause where our eyes collide and we pant, deciding what we should do next. So much has gone on and in the end I know I’ll end up as confused as when this all began. Somehow, I can’t seem to care.
I want this.
Him.
He must think the same thing because suddenly he’s kicking off his jeans along with his boxers. He rips the towel from my body and his hands slide up my legs, spreading me open. I bite down on my lip, waiting in anticipation for him to thrust inside me. Instead of sliding into me, though, he dips his face down toward my open legs. I gasp as his tongue slides inside me, my body curving upward of it’s own accord.
“Alex…” I grasp handfuls of his hair, unsure what to do or where I should channel this vulnerable, helpless energy to as his tongue slips inside me, filling me like his fingers did earlier. It’s almost too much, my emotions are out of my power. I writhe against his tongue, fighting to breathe and function as I’m pushed over the edge. I scream so loud I’m sure the whole house can hear it.
As I catch my breath, his tongue leaves me and seconds later his lips crash against mine. I barely have time to regain my breathing as our tongues twine together, our bodies welding and becoming almost one as he thrusts deep inside me. It doesn’t hurt as bad as the first time, but I’m still tender. I jab my nails into his back as I hold onto him, splitting the skin open on his back, clawing into reality. Our bodies dampen with sweat as they move rhythmically together and our breaths grow ragged.
I don’t have any control over what I’m doing or feeling. All I can do is hold onto him and, even though I’m not sure I want to, trust him not to break me.
His lips leave mine as he licks and bites a path down my neck, to my collarbone as his hand grips my breast. He grazes his finger over my nipple and so much heat coils through my body that I can’t even think straight.
With one final thrust, my body and mind spiral out-of-control and I grab onto him as euphoria takes me over. I let my head fall back and it slams against the mirror. I think I hear the glass shatter, though I’m too far gone to care.
Moments later, Alex buries his face into the crook of my neck, his body tensing. Once he relaxes, he places kiss after kiss onto my skin, sucking on it, making a path to my mouth.
With one last kiss, he slips out of me. His hands grip my waist as he guides me off the countertop, then he stares over my shoulder. I follow his gaze, turning my head, only to find that I did shatter the mirror. Glass is everywhere, behind me, in the sink, on the counter.
I turn my head back to look at him, opening my mouth to say something, but I can’t find anything to say.
He combs his fingers through my hair, tugging my head back a little, and forcing me to look at him. “I didn’t mean for that to happen,” he says. “I just…” he trails off. “I don’t know how to deal with how I feel around you. You simultaneously piss me off, turn me on and frustrate me. No one’s every done that to me before.”
“Me, neither,” I admit. “But then again, I’ve only been able to feel those things for a few months so…” I frown, unsure how I feel anymore, whether I want to be driven by a grudge or let it go.
His green eyes fill with something I can’t quite place while his fingers linger in my hair. “I don’t want you running off to Laylen for help,” he says. “I want you to come to me.”
I look down at my legs wrapped around his waist, so close to him physically, yet mentally we’re still incredibly far away. “I honestly still don’t know if I can trust you.” I look up at him. “I mean, sometimes I ask you questions and you give the vaguest answers. Also, when we first met… the stuff you did and said… it’s hard to forget.”
“I’m sorry,” he utters quietly and it’s a weird moment because Alex isn’t the type of guy that says sorry a lot. “I’m sorry all of this happened. That you had to go through everything and that I’m a total douche who you have to feel this crazy electricity feeling with.”
I swallow the lump lodged in my throat put there by the intensity in his voice. “It went away for a moment, y
ou know. When Laylen… when he bit me.”
“How did that… how did that feel?” He seems torn with wanting to hear the answer or even asking the question.
“Weird. Crazy. Unnatural.” I shrug. “Honestly, it kind of made me feel empty.” Some of the tension leaves his face, like he’s relieved by my answer. “But I still don’t know exactly how I feel about you or what’s driving what I do feel.”
He eyes me over, seeming undecided, as if he’s having an internal battle with himself. Then he grips my waist and lifts me off the counter.
He reaches for his jeans on the floor. “Get dressed,” he says as he slips them on.
I reach for my clean shirt folded up on the counter beside the sink. “Okay.” My voice is tight, figuring we’re heading back to where we started. He’s being distant and I’m sure he’s going to start shutting down. Goddammit. Why do I do this to myself?
He slips his shirt on over his head and then heads for the door, and feelings of shame, guilt and irritation flood me.
“Where are you going?” I tug the shirt over my head. “Are you leaving?”
He pauses, glancing over his shoulder as he grasps the doorknob. “I’m going to go find the one person that I know of who can get us into The Underworld.”
I start to smile, a full, real smile. “To find my mom?”
He nods. “But don’t get so happy yet. First we have to deal with the person who’s going to help us.” He jerks the door open as I slip the skirt on. “And it’s going to be a pain in the ass.
“Why?” I tie the top of the skirt.
He looks unhappy as he steps into the hall. “The only Foreseer I know who’s not afraid of breaking the rules.”
I point my finger at myself. “Me?”
“No someone who is experienced and knows the history.” He steps out into the hall and I follow. “We’re going to find Nicholas.”
Chapter 8
“You want to bring Nicholas here?” I frown as I trot down the stairs behind him, gathering my damp hair into a side braid “Like the pervert Faerie/Foreseer/likes-to-invade-my-personal-space, Nicholas? The one who became a mirage and made me believe he was you more than a few times?”
He glances over his shoulder, nodding. “That would be the one.”
I shake my head as we enter the living room. It’s miraculously been put back into place, the walls mended, the chairs fixed, and the apothecary table looks like it’s never been touched. “Do we really need him, though?” I ask. “Isn’t there anyone else who can help us?”
“My connections in the Foreseer world are very limited.” He flops down on the couch, shaking his head. “Trust me, Gemma. He’s the last person I ever want to go to for help, well besides someone like Draven.” He glances up at my neck and I have the urge to cover my neck and hide the two small, healing bite marks on it. “Foreseer’s can travel anywhere at any moment, which is why Nicholas was able to randomly show up back in Colorado. You remember the crystal ball he used to get us into the City of Crystal, right?”
I sit down on the couch beside him. “How could I forget? I nearly broke my damn arm.”
He presses his lips together, draping his arm on the back of the sofa. “Well, that crystal ball allows them to travel everywhere.”
I perk up a little. “Everywhere as in places like The Underworld?”
His fingers brush the back of my neck and begin tracing soft, circular patterns. “That’s what I’m not one-hundred percent sure of. I’d guess yes, but I never like to guess about things. The only way to really find out is to talk to a Foreseer who knows the history.”
“And you think he’s going to willingly help us?” I frown doubtfully. “I’ve only met him once, but I’m guessing he’s not the kind of person to just hand over information.”
“I know.”
“So…what do we have to do then? How do we get him to cooperate?”
His fingers trail around to the front of my neck, up to my cheek where he finds a loose strand of my hair and coils it around his finger. “We have to bring him here.”
“And then what?” I wonder. “We just go down there and get my mom? I’m guessing it’s not going to be that easy.”
He offers me a sad smile. “It’s not… that place is dangerous. More dangerous than anywhere you’ve ever been.”
“Then who’s going to go to this place?” I ask. “Me?”
He shakes his head. “But I can’t go, either. It’s going to have to be someone we can trust to keep an eye on Nicholas since he’ll have to take them there. Someone like Aislin… and Laylen, I guess.”
I elevate my eyebrows at him and he releases my hair before shifting uneasily back in the chair. “You trust Laylen?”
His shoulders lift and fall as he shrugs. “If he’s with Aislin, then I’m sure he’ll be okay.”
“You sound like you don’t believe it yourself,” I remark, studying him over. “What are you up to?”
He narrows his eyes. “I’m just trying to help you. That’s all. Jesus, can’t you simply trust me?”
“Trust is something earned,” I say.
He glares at me, his green eyes smoldering. “Like when I sacrificed myself against a memoria extracto so you’d be okay?”
I evade the question because he’s right, yet distrust stabs at the back of my neck. I can’t seem to shake the feeling for some reason, even when he proves otherwise. “Why won’t you go?”
“Because I’ll be going somewhere else.” He stands to his feet and extends his hand out to me. “Now come with me. Let’s go get Nicholas and get this whole thing over with.”
***
We go into the back room where Adessa stores her supplies on rows and rows of metal shelves that are stacked with boxes, elaborate objects, and glass jars filled with disturbing looking things.
Aislin joins us, seeming cheerful as ever, yet I can feel the awkward energy between us. “Hey, Gemma,” she says.
I smile, but it feels forced. “Hey.”
She glances at my clothes. “You look good in what I picked out. Very Black Angel like.”
I look down at my boots, skirt, and tank top. “That’s why you picked me out such a Gothic wardrobe? So I’d look like a Black Angel?”
She nods, picking up a box embedded with miniscule, silvery diamonds. “I thought it would help you blend in.”
I want to tell her I’m sorry, yet now doesn’t seem like the time. Maybe when Alex isn’t around perhaps.
She lifts open the lid and sniffs the inside of the box. “So what are we doing exactly? Trying to figure out what my… what Stephan is doing?”
Alex quickly fills her in, letting her know his plan. Something about her reaction unsettles me to no end, especially when Alex says that I’m going to use a Foreseer’s crystal ball to summon Nicholas here.
“Are you insane?” I gape at Alex. “There’s no way I’m doing that.”
Alex rolls his eyes, like I’m being absurd, but I’m not. “You want to get your mom back, right?”
“Of course,” I reply, propping my elbow onto a shelf. “But not by using a crystal. Every time I’ve used one I’ve seen stuff I’d rather not and, besides… didn’t you make some promise to Dyvinius that I wouldn’t use my power until I was trained.”
Aislin’s examining a jar that looks like it has a chicken leg or something in it. When I say this, she nearly drops it on the concrete floor. “You did what? She rebalances the jar in her hand. “Alex, why the heck did you do that?”
I stand up straight and step toward Aislin. “Wait. What happens if he breaks it?”
Aislin sets the jar back down on the shelf and fidgets with the straps on her floral, pink dress. “He’ll end up having to go to the City of Crystal to do—”
“Aislin,” Alex warns, spinning a steel ball balanced on a podium. “Don’t.”
I scowl at him. “Are you seriously trying to keep things from me?”
He stands up straight and steps in front of me. His nearness forc
es me to crane my neck back to look at him as he backs me against the shelf. “This is for your own good.”
“Why?” I ask as the edges of the shelf press against me.
“Because you won’t do it if I tell you.” He puts a hand on each side of me, pinning me between his arms.
“How do you know that?” I cross my arms. “Maybe I won’t mind whatever’s going to happen to you.”
He rolls his eyes again. “Yes, you will because, whether you’ll admit it or not, you care about me.”
I open my mouth to protest, but I can’t get any words to come out. A faint stab reveals at the back of my neck and unexpectedly I realize that I do care about Alex, despite the bad that’s happened between us.
“Please just tell me,” I practically beg, gripping onto the bottom of his shirt. My knuckles brush against his muscles and the contact singes my skin. “I want to know what we’re getting into.”
The side of his mouth crooks up into a lopsided smile. “All you need to do is use your power to get Nicholas here, then you can leave the rest to everyone else.”
“I could go to The Underworld, you know,” I tell him firmly. “I’m not completely incompetent. Besides, it is my mom we’re going after. It should be me who goes and gets her.”
He sighs and places his hand on my cheek, his thumb grazing a line across my cheekbone. “Regardless of everything you’ve done over the last few days… walking into a Vampire Lair… you still have the star’s energy inside you, and until we know for sure what the hell it’s being used for…. Why my….” He swallows hard. “Why my father wants it, then we need to keep you safe. Furthermore, the last thing we need is for the Queen of The Underworld to get her hands on you. She’s almost as bad as Demetrius and his Death Walkers.”
“Are you sure there’s not another way to bring him here?” I ask. “I mean, don’t you guys use phones or something?"
The corners of his lips quirk. “I’m pretty sure there’s no service in the City of Crystal.”
I want to roll my eyes at him, but I don’t. What I want to do is hug him because I have this feeling something really bad is about to happen. “Just promise me you’re not going to die,” I whisper.
Shattered Promises 02 - Fractured Souls Page 8
