by Harper West
With that, I wrapped my legs around his waist, and drew him closer to me. He hissed as his cock caught at my entrance, and I felt it pulse. He captured my lips in a soft kiss before his lips fluttered down my neck.
“Oh, Nathan,” I whispered. “That feels so good.”
He nibbled and sucked on my skin and I knew I'd have marks left behind in the morning. I didn’t care, though. I didn’t give a shit who saw evidence of tonight. I just wanted was to feel him filling me, over and over again, until I begged for mercy. He let go of my hands and I gripped his hair, holding tightly onto him as he kissed the space between my breasts. His hands slid along my sides, tickling me ever so slightly, before sinking his teeth into my skin and forcing me to buck against his hips.
I’d never had someone control me with only his mouth before. I loved it.
I loved everything about it. Because it was with Nathan.
He continued kissing down the my torso, towards my hip crease, closer and closer to where I was dripping wet and aching for him. My back to arched as his tongue traced my seam. I shivered, bucking against his face in search for more friction. And as his fingers parted my lower lips, I heard him moan.
“So wet for me,” he murmured.
He teased my clit with his tongue and my toes curled. His touches were light and delicate as he flicked the sensitive bud. I wanted to yank him closer and bury him in my juices. I wanted to flip him over and straddle his fucking face. I wanted him to fuck me. No, I needed it.
“Nathan, please,” I whimpered.
He hovered over my clit. “Please, what?”
I swallowed hard. “I need you inside me. Please.”
Without another word, he pulled away from me for a moment. I watched as he rummaged around in his wallet for something. It wasn’t until I heard the ripping of the foil that I knew what he was doing. I rose up onto my elbows and I him rolling a condom up his massive dick.
“Can’t be too careful,” he said with a wink.
Condom on, he pounced like a wild animal, sinking into me easily, with one swift movement. He set a relentless pace, kissing my lips and rocking his hips into me. I wrapped myself around him, clinging to him for dear life as waves of pleasure coursed through my system.
“Nathan, fuck. You feel so good. Holy shit, please. I—I just—”
He bit into my shoulder. “Jesus Christ, Elizabeth. You feel so goddamn good.”
I lost myself in him in the movement of our bodies. My nails slid along his back. Our kisses grew messy and furious. The sounds of skin against skin filled the room, along with his groans and my whimpers. As he continued hitting that perfect spot inside me with his throbbing cock, my body gave itself over to the pleasure. I felt that coil tightening in my gut.
“Nathan, I’m so close. So close. Please, just a little—yes! Right there. Right there. Just like that, Nathan. Oh, my God.”
His hands planted firmly on either side of my head. “That’s the spot. Fuck. Squeeze that dick, Elizab—I’m coming. I’m coming. Holy shit.”
“Yes!” I exclaimed.
I dug my nails into his back and tightened my legs around his waist. I convulsed, releasing every single pent-up emotion and shard of stress. He came, seconds later, spilling inside of me, flooding the condom. He collapsed on top of me before rolling over and pulling my back flush against his chest.
“Holy hell,” I said breathlessly.
He kissed the spot on my shoulder that he'd bitten. “I’ll say.”
"Well, that was fun.”
He chuckled breathlessly. “Yep.”
I wiggled around until I faced him. “I can see why people get obsessed with this. This feeling is... I don't know. I feel like I could fly.”
He said nothing. He just kissed my forehead.
I nuzzled against his chest. "I'm so tired, though.”
He wrapped his arms around me, holding me close. “Me too. You wore me out.”
I smirked, thinking of the best way to tease a football player about his lack of stamina.
"Don't worry. I'll get you back in the morning," he murmured as his eyes closed.
15
Nathan
Elizabeth tapped her pencil on the table, her brows furrowed, and her lips curved downward in a frown.
She looked so gorgeous when she studied that I couldn't help but stare at her. Over the past couple of months, I became a lot more accustomed to her little quirks. Some of them were downright adorable. Like her studying face. We had come such a long way from high school and moments like this, alone with her, made me glad we’d dealt with our uncomfortable past.
Her handwriting was neat and uniform, and her notes were impeccably structured and easy to read. She had this professional, serious demeanor whenever she worked on anything for school. Especially for her major. The MCAT was no joke, but I knew she would pass and get accepted into some prestigious medical school. She would excel and make her family and friends insanely proud. I was already in awe of the way she dealt with the dense, difficult material. It came naturally to her. She made it look easy.
Sometimes, I wondered what she saw in me. She was smart. Smarter than I was. And destined for greatness. I was just grateful that I had caught her eye. And that she was willing to give me another chance after how horrible I was to her throughout high school.
It scared the hell out of me to admit it, but with each passing day, I fell more and more in love with Elizabeth. Thinking about the word love made me panic a little, but at the same time, it felt right. I had plenty of dating experience, but long-term relationships had never worked out for me. I was sure things would be different with Elizabeth. I didn't have to put on an air or be someone I wasn't to impress her. We simply enjoyed being in each other's presence. I was never much of a sentimental person, yet here I was, absolutely head over heels for her. I loved being in love with her.
I hadn't told Elizabeth all of this yet. Our relationship was going well, but every time I thought about confessing my love for her, I chickened out. On the rare occasion that I did try to have a more serious discussion, I either changed the subject last minute or clammed up entirely. Elizabeth could be hard to read sometimes. I didn’t know if saying I love you would freak her out. I didn't want to put her on the spot or ruin the great thing we had going. She had said, on multiple occasions, that she wanted to take things slow, and given our history, I couldn't blame her. It took her a while to trust me enough to sleep with me. I knew it would also take her even longer love me.
Lately, most of our conversations revolved around school and studying for our MCAT and LSAT exams. We barely had time to hang our, let alone have a serious conversation. We were both pretty stressed out and overwhelmed. It would be amazing to have just one night where we could be together and not have to crack open a giant textbook. It was starting to seriously wear the two of us out mentally, emotionally, and even physically. Elizabeth had migraines and anxiety attacks a lot more often these days. We were both losing sleep and skipping meals here and there. I was amazed we didn't get carpal tunnel yet from all of the note-taking.
I hated seeing Elizabeth so worn out and exhausted. Every few minutes, I looked up from my books to glance over at her, her face frozen in a perpetually miserable expression. As much as she loved her medicine, I could tell school was starting to become a chore for her.
I thought about tapping her on the arm to ask if she wanted to take a break, but before I could do so, she slammed down her pencil and sighed, exasperated. She looked like she was on the verge of tears.
"I'm freaking out," she mumbled, pressing her forehead back into her hands as her entire body trembled. "I'm burning out here. I've reached my limit for the day. No, actually, I probably hit my limit two hours ago. Ugh. I have to finish taking notes on this chapter, though, or I'm going to fall behind. I'm such a failure. I hate this," she ranted, sniffling. She lifted her face from her hands and wiped her eyes with her shirt sleeve. "I'm sorry I'm being so dramatic, Nathan. I'm at the point where I
don't think my brain can fit any more information. I just—" she continued, but I held up a hand and interrupted her.
"You're going to be okay, Elizabeth.," I assured her. "You're the smartest person I know, and you're totally killing it. I am so, so freaking proud of you. You're not a failure.” I reached out and put her hands in mine, looking up at her. "We both need to take better care of ourselves. We’re getting in our own way.” I offered her a warm smile and gave her hands a reassuring squeeze.
"I'm so lucky to have you," she whispered, reverently. "I don't know what I'd do without you." She pulled her right hand away and wiped away another tear. “Ugh. I’m sorry I’m crying.”
"I'm the lucky one here," I replied with a quiet chuckle. "You are so damn brilliant. You're just stressed out right now. Hell, we both are. Everyone shows it in different ways. It's okay to cry and get upset and frustrated, okay?"
I stroked the top of her right hand with my thumb, trying to ease her anxiety. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment.
"You're right. You're right..." she whispered meekly. She shrank, trying to make herself smaller. "But what the hell am I going to do? I don't know if I can keep going like this. But I can’t stop either.”
"Listen to me for a second, okay? It's okay to take a break when you're feeling like this," I explained, calmly. "How about we go outside for twenty minutes to calm down and compose ourselves. We deserve that much. Want to go for a walk?"
She looked down at her phone to check the time, then back over to the enormous textbook. She took a deep breath and sat up straighter, before nodding. "You have no idea how badly I need this," she said gratefully. She put her pencil on the table and slid a bookmark into her textbook.
"I know Elizabeth. And right now, I'm pretty excited to spend some time together without a bunch of books between us," I said, laughing. "Let's go. We'll go outside for a little walk around campus and get some fresh air." I stretched my arms and legs, standing up and closing my book. I cracked my knuckles and let out a long, dramatic yawn.
"I think all of this stagnant, recirculated library air is poisoning my brain," Elizabeth quipped. She picked up her purse and rummaged around for her lip balm. "Just a sec. It's cold out there, and my skin gets so dry.” She tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. "Oh, wow, I don't think I even brushed my hair today,”
“You still look beautiful.”
She rolled her eyes.
“I mean it. This is a good look for you," I assured her.
“Frazzled?” she asks, amazed. “Unkempt? Messy?”
“Natural.”
She blushed, but smiled.
Elizabeth and I walked out of the library and into the cool winter afternoon. A layer of frost had formed on the grass, untouched and shimmering brilliantly in the sunlight. She put her jacket on and scarf and followed me down the stone staircase onto the sidewalk below.
"You were right, Nathan. I needed this, and it looks like you did, too," she giggled, watching me stretch my arms and legs in the sun.
We walked, side by side, on the short trail that surrounded the library. I grabbed her and interlaced our fingers. We strolled mostly in silence, grateful for the opportunity to just be together.
"I wish every day could be just like this," she sighed. "I mean, not like the stressful studying and crying part, but just...this right here."
She turned to face me and leaned in for a kiss. I pulled her in close and cupped her cheeks in my hands, kissing her more deeply.
Maybe now I can tell her, I thought.
When the kiss broke, my cock was at half-mast. We locked eyes for a few seconds and I got this fluttering, nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach, like a million butterflies were trying to break free. As strange as it felt, it was also exhilarating.
"Elizabeth, I love you," I said, plainly.
Her eyes widened and she stared back at me, amazed and confused. Her jaw dropped and her mouth formed an O shape. Her entire body froze in place. I swallowed nervously, waiting for her response, all alone except for the winter breeze.
The longer we stood there, the more chilling the silence became.
And with every passing moment, I got the sinking suspicion that she wasn't going to say it back.
16
Elizabeth
Nathan stared into my eyes, waiting for me to say something. My mouth hung open, and I was completely taken aback by what he’d just said. He loved me? How could he love me? We had only been dating for a few months?
"What?" I asked flatly. "W-what are you talking about? What do you mean? What am I supposed to say to that?" I pulled away from him and stared, feeling confused and awkward.
"I love you, Elizabeth. I'm serious. I know it's probably too soon to say it, but..." he trailed off, running a hand through his gelled-up, spiky blond fauxhawk. He looked panicked.
"Um," I whispered. "Are you serious? You're in love with me?” Suddenly, I felt a little angry. "Why would you say that to me while I'm studying for the most important exam of my entire life? I can't deal with this right now." My voice cracked as I turned away.
"Deal with this? You have to figure out how to deal with me being in love with you? Really?" he blurted out. "Wow, I'm so sorry that our relationship is such a huge burden on you right now!"
"What do you want me to say? I really can't think about this right now, Nathan. We have so much going on. You have the LSATs. I have the MCATs." I shook my head as tears started to stream down my face. I bit my lip and dried my eyes on my shirt sleeve. "Things were going so well between us. This is too much. I'm going back in to go study.”
Thankfully, we were alone, or else we would have made a huge scene.
"In two days, the fate of my entire life will be determined by how I do one one test. I don’t have time for love right now.” I turned to storm off back toward the library, but he put a hand on my shoulder. I jerked away from him.
"Elizabeth, I...I don't know why I said that. You're right. It was way too soon. I'm sorry. Please try to understand—" he sputtered, but I cut him off.
"No, you feel what you feel, and that's fine. But I can't worry about feelings until this is over," I groaned. ”How would you even know if you love me yet, anyway? That's completely insane! We've only been together for a couple of months, Nathan! Months!" My hands were balled into fists, my entire body tense and stiff.
I wanted to love him. But I didn’t. Not yet, anyway. Almost. But… not just yet.
"Months or not, I meant it," he replied. "You're the only girl I've ever felt this way about. I don't know how it happened so fast, but it did. So I said it. I know the timing was terrible, but I couldn't hold back anymore." He stared at the ground with his shoulders slumped.
"Just me? I'm...the first girl you've ever loved?" I asked. I cocked my head, curiously. Usually, Nathan was pretty easy to read, but now, he was giving off all kinds of weird mixed signals.
"Yes. And it scares the shit out of me," he said, his voice hardly louder than a whisper. "It's so scary falling in love with someone this fast. Maybe I should have kept it to myself. I mean... I probably I just ruined things between us, didn't I?”
"No, you didn't ruin everything," I responded, "but this does make things a lot harder and more confusing. You had to know that this would change things. We have a good thing going on between us and now I feel like I'm supposed to reciprocate, but I don't even know how I feel, and—"
"You don't have to say it back," Nathan reasoned. “You don't have to feel the same way. I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm saying and I probably just need to shut up before I make things worse. I'm just so, so damn scared of losing you, Elizabeth. Please, please just think about this. We can pretend this never happened.”
”How am I supposed to pretend this never happened?" I asked him. "I don't think I can do this."
“Elizabeth…”
“Nathan, I'm sorry. I need a minute. I need… to go study."
I turned my back to him and continued walking
back to the library, but my pace had slowed almost to a complete stop. I doubled back. I had more to say to Nathan.
“Look, I know you care about me. That's not the problem. I care about you, too, Nathan. I just don't understand why you brought this up right before I'm about to take an exam that determines the entire rest of my future and my career."
"Well, honestly, I've been thinking it for the past two weeks or so," he confessed. "I've been trying to find a time to tell you. Every time just felt wrong. Something about today...I don't know. I suddenly had to tell you."
I was almost back at the library. I needed to go back inside, keep studying, and deal with all of this later, but I still had so many questions for Nathan. I still wasn't sure how I felt. Did I love him? I mean, I definitely had strong feelings for him. I’ve never felt this way before.
But, this was all new to me.
"I wasn't expecting you to say it back or anything," he assured me. "I don't know why I fell for you so fast. But, does anyone ever know why they love someone?." He scratched his head. "Like I said, it's not like I’ve ever been in love before."
I bit my lip as more tears streamed down my face and fell to the sidewalk, leaving little wet dots on the ground. "I can't think about love right now," I whispered, confused.
“We can talk whenever you're ready, I guess. I probably need some time to think, too. I'm going to go grab my stuff and head home. I'm really sorry, Elizabeth. I don't know what else to say." He walked away without another word.
I stood there, cold and alone, bawling my eyes out. I sat down on a nearby bench and put my head in my hands as I wept. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed McKenzie's number. Thankfully, she answered.
"Hey, girl, what's up?" she asked, her bubbly voice bringing me a tiny bit of comfort.
"Can we talk?” My voice cracked as I spoke. "I really need you right now. I don't know what to do."
Her entire tone changed immediately. "Oh, no, Elizabeth, what's wrong? What did Nathan do?” She sounded angry.
