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Transcriber's Note:
This etext was produced from Galaxy Science Fiction December 1952. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.
The Reluctant Weapon
by HOWARD L. MYERS
Illustrated by EMSH
_A live weapon is a downright liability ... it's all too apt to get qualms of conscience!_
* * * * *
_When the Zoz Horde passed destructively through this sector of theGalaxy, approximately a billion years ago, they suffered a minor loss.One of their weapons, Sentient Killer No. VT672, had an unexplainedmalfunction and was left behind to be repaired by the slavetechnicians who followed the Horde. However, the Zoz were met andannihilated by the Ghesh Empire, after which the masterless slavesdispersed to their home planets. The weapon, unrepaired, was leftforgotten in the solar system it had failed to destroy._
]
* * * * *
Tresqu the Wisest, Ruler of Hova, Lord of the Universe, was beingentertained by a troupe of Goefd dancers when his Lord of War, Wert,bounded into the Audience Hall. In his hurry to reach Tresqu's throne,Wert slipped on the nearly frictionless floor and skidded through theformation of dancers, sending the slender Goefden sprawling in alldirections. He slid to a halt by the Pleading Mat, onto which hecrawled and groveled, awaiting permission to speak.
"I believe three of the dancers received broken legs," Tresqu observedcalmly. "They are rather delicate creatures and not at all clumsy." Hedipped the tip of his tail into an urn of chilled perfume and gentlydabbed it about his nostril. Speaking pleasantly, with long pausesbetween sentences, he kept his friendly gaze on the groveling Wert."Oft I meditate on the clumsiness of our race in comparison to manyothers who are our graceful servants. Why, I wonder, cannot the rulersbe graceful? Some of us are very clumsy indeed--too clumsy to live."
A tremor passed through Wert's stocky body.
"Possibly my Lord of War has news of sufficient import to excuse hisungainly haste. But I sincerely doubt it. I fear I must soon appoint asuccessor to him. Undoubtedly he has news of some sort. Blurt, Wert!"
"Your Majestic Wisdom," whined Wert, "my message is of utmostimportance! The natives of Sol III have captured one of ourdecontaminator ships and learned its secrets!"
"Sol III?"
"Yes, Your Wisdom. The planet called Terra."
"Terra? You must realize, lordling, that I cannot occupy myself withremembering trivialities about individual worlds."
"Yes, Your Wisdom. We have a base, which is commanded by--that is, we_had_ a base commanded--"
"Enough!" snapped Tresqu. "You start your tale from nowhere and wanderwhence and hence!" He raised his voice and called to one of hisretainers. "Fool! Come forward!"
An abnormally slender Hovan arose from a platform off to Tresqu's leftand skipped nimbly forward to stand insolently over the Lord of War,who was still prone on the Pleading Mat.
"Recite for me," said Tresqu, "the contents of my gazetteer on theplanet Sol III. Listen well, Wert. You may even yet live long enoughto profit by my Fool's style of declamation. Study it well. Also, youmay raise your eyes sufficiently to observe the grace of hismovements. Proceed, sprite."
"Sol III," began the Fool. "An H9 planet. Sol is in the Sirian ColonySector, coordinates GL 15-44-17-5, GR 12 [to the power of 7] plus 9, D14. Terra's life is normal animal-vegetable, with one intelligentspecies of hovoids called Humans. Due to the unpleasantly high oxygencontent of the atmosphere, Terra has not been colonized, but has beenplaced under the control of the Science Ministry for the purpose oflong-range psychological experiments." The Fool picked up Wert's tailand twisted it hard but absently as he talked. The Lord of Wartwitched painfully. "Many informative reports on the results of theseexperiments have been released by the ministry during the past seventhousand years, dealing mainly with the Humans. The Science Ministryhas declared Terra out of bounds--_Positively no visitors_."
With a single flow of motion, the Fool gave Wert's tail a final twist,leaped over his body, and bowed deeply to Tresqu.
"Beautifully done, Fool," applauded the Ruler of Hova. "Your motherclaims me as your father, and there are times I am inclined to believeher. How would you like to be my Lord of War, Fool?"
"Verily, my good master," said the Fool, "I hope you consider me aFool by title only."
"Well said, Fool. You are spared. Go seek your pleasures."
With another bow, the Fool backed away.
"Stand up, Wert," said Tresqu, "and tell me about this captureddecontamination ship."
The Lord of War arose and managed to report with some smoothness. "Twoyears ago, the Science Ministry turned Terra over to my command,saying their long series of experiments was concluded. Theyrecommended complete decontamination of the planet, since the Humanswere developing technologies which could eventually threaten us. Idispatched a ship for that purpose immediately, but it failed toreturn. Also, reports from our base on Terra's satellite Luna ceasedsoon thereafter. A scouting expedition was sent. It has just reportedthe Luna base destroyed completely, and the decontaminator shipcrashed and stripped of all important devices in one of the Terrandeserts. By studying these removed devices, the Humans haveundoubtedly developed protections against them.
"I humbly submit, Your Majestic Wisdom, that these events haveendangered the safety of your glorious empire, and that drastic stepsagainst the Humans should be taken immediately. Also, Good Lord ofAll, I submit that the Science Ministry, not the War Ministry, is atfault in this affair. They obviously let their experiments get out ofcontrol before calling us. Undoubtedly they would like to shift thefull blame onto my shoulders."
Tresqu continued his pleasant demeanor. "There may be some truth inwhat you say, Wert. You overestimate the danger in this matter, Iperceive. After all, what is one backward planet against the forces ofmy empire containing thirty-seven well-armed worlds? The Humans willbe destroyed, even if they have the secrets of a decontaminator ship.As for the blame, which I admit is deplorable, the Lord of Sciencewill be called to the Mat to make his excuses. Now, assuming youremain Lord of War, what action do you plan to take against theHumans?"
"Your Gracious Wisdom," faltered Wert, "I suggest we use the--theWeapon. You see, our forces are not fully mobilized at present forimmediate action--"
"Full mobilization isn't necessary or even desirable," Tresquinterrupted with some impatience. "One task force can do the job. Ah!I see by your expression that you do not have even one task force inreadiness."
"Your Gracious Wisdom," begged Wert, "you ordered a full holiday thismonth to celebrate the twenty-fourth anniversary of your magnificentreign, and--"
"Enough, Wert! Your tongue is as clumsy as your body." Tresqu nibbledthoughtfully at the tip of his tail. "We will use the Weapon," hedecided. "In order to allow my court to continue their holiday, I'llassume direct command in this." He rose from his throne. "Musicians,summon my guards. I go to visit the Weapon. Come, Wert; come also,Fool. You will accompany me."
* * * * *
Shortly thereafter, Tresqu and his entourage boarded the royal cruiserand roared away from the City of Wisdom. The ship flew halfway aroundthe planet and came to rest in a peaceful purple valley where insectsshrilled contentedly and a small stream rippled. Tresqu climbed outonto the violet turf, his followers coming after him.
"Mighty Weapon of Zoz," he called, "I, Tresqu, seek your presence!"
&nb
sp; "Oh, no!" groaned a slightly mechanical voice that seemed to comefrom no particular direction. "Will there never be peace, never atranquil moment to soothe my spirit and erase the bloody stains ofdestruction recorded on my past?"
"That voice! It carries me away!" breathed the Fool. "Such a tragictale of tormented strength is implicit in its very tone that I think Ishall swoon!" But he wrapped his tail around the trunk of a nearbysapling for support and managed to retain consciousness.
"Me, too!" Wert chimed in with suspicious haste. "I'm quite moved!"
"Try not to counterfeit a soul you do not possess." Tresqu glowered atWert. "You deceive no one."
The Fool was recovered
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