by Janie Marie
“We can’t throw Kylie out.” Logan hadn’t figured out what his feelings for Kylie were yet, but he knew there was still something there. He’d only fought it because of everything that had happened and for the belief the others had about Kylie’s soul being the one who would destroy Janie.
Ryder shook his head. “I’m not throwing her little blond ass out.”
Logan cracked a smile. “Why do you always point out she’s a blonde?”
“Same reason I point out you’re a dumb motherfucker. Facts.” He grinned, but he was tense, ready to fight if needed. “Did baby girl say anything odd?”
He sighed, nodding. “Not in so many words, but you know her even more than I do.”
“She’s going to do something stupid.” Ryder exhaled, closing his eyes. “If I go after them, I can end this.”
“You know that’s what they’re waiting for.” Logan didn’t want to advise Ryder on this, but he was the best.
“I know. I’m trying to figure out what they’ll do to lure you, though.”
“Me?” Logan sat up straighter.
“Kevin needs to take me out to get to Lorelei and Maura. He wants Kylie dead and Janie, or to have them to use as tools for whatever his plans are now. But Trevor’s shit is personal with you.” He took a deep breath, though it didn’t seem to help him at all. He still sounded like everything was out of his control. “He’s obsessed with Janie. Now, once more, you’re a strong fixture in her life. He has proof of just how close you two have gotten. He only cares about hurting you two, and for both of you to witness the other hurt. I think he’s hopeful I’ll kill Kevin because he can’t. But his goal is going to be to get you and Janie. He might use Kylie or the others, but it’s going to happen somehow.”
“What if we’re sufficient, then?” Logan stared at Janie, but he saw Kylie in his mind at the same time.
“You think we should let ourselves get caught?”
Logan saw Janie’s smile when she was with Ryder, and his vision of Jane’s smile to Jason—him. Then he saw Kylie. He didn’t know how to view her anymore. She was choosing her family, and he couldn’t be prouder. He’d seen her smile at Maura several times yesterday. It was a smile he’d never seen on her face. It was beautiful. He’d do anything to make sure that smile never died. Then he’d told her about their stars. He shouldn’t have told her so he wouldn’t distract her, but it felt right. “Yeah,” he said, focusing on Ryder again. “I’m done watching Janie like this, and I can’t imagine asking Kylie and Maura to continue putting their lives on the line after today. It’s fucking nuts how it happens all on the first day.”
Ryder chuckled. “Because this is Hell.”
Logan believed it now, and he became more resolute in keeping all the girls safe. “We’ll load the guard around the girls here and go hunting for them. They’ll be watching, I’m sure. But I don’t think Kevin will pass up the chance to take both or one of us out. We’d be the ultimate trophies.”
Ryder nodded “Worst that can happen is we die.”
“Or get captured.” Logan reached back for Janie’s hand, smiling as he gave it a little squeeze. “You’ll get back to her, though.”
“Bitch, are you trying to make me feel bad if something happens to you? I’ll bring your ass back too.” Ryder hitched his thumb toward the door. “Beat it. We’ll finish planning something tomorrow.”
Logan grinned, leaning down to kiss Janie’s cheek. “Night, baby doll.”
She raised a hand to his cheek, mumbling, “Jason, stay.”
It hurt in so many ways, but he gave her another kiss and whispered, “Ryder’s here now. He won’t leave you. I love you.”
Her hand fell away, and she smiled, the dried tears on her face cracking. “Forever.”
He nodded, moving away. “Forever, babe.”
“Hey,” Ryder said when Logan stood. “I know what you saw all those months ago. If I wasn’t selfish, I’d step aside and let you two have this second chance.”
A crushing feeling in his throat made his eyes burn. “If you were selfish, I wouldn’t be here, and I wouldn’t know what it’s like for her to look at me the way she does now.” He patted Ryder’s shoulder. “I’ll make sure shit’s locked up.”
“Don’t go sneaking into Kylie’s room. I heard about your cute shit with her. Don’t fuck things up.”
“I won’t.” Logan turned, chuckling. “I’m pretty sure she’d kick my ass if I tried, anyway.”
Ryder tugged his shirt off then joined Janie. “Nah, I think she misses your ugly ass, and you’d sweep her off her feet. Let her finish finding herself before you show her you’re still a horny ass Logan Grimm.”
“Night, asshole.” Logan pulled open the door.
“Get some real sleep, fucker.” Ryder grinned as Janie rolled toward him and put her head over his heart. “We’ll be heroes tomorrow.”
Logan nodded, leaving and locking them in safe. He thought about going to the solarium, but he wasn’t sure he could handle recalling everything he’d shared with Kylie there, so he headed to the library.
He didn’t expect to see the place guarded by three wolves. “What’s up?”
One of them answered. “The blonde asked to come down. Sin’s in with her.”
“Fuck.” He considered leaving, but he felt bad for not making sure she was okay earlier. After arriving at the mansion and finding Janie covered in Hero’s blood, holding her dead wolf as Ryder and Tercero dug a hole by Janie’s weeping willow tree, he’d given her all his attention. Ryder had shit to handle, and she needed someone to keep her together. More importantly, someone to keep her from running off. During that, he’d forgotten Kylie had been there to see it all.
“Fuck it.” Logan went in, catching sight of Sin first.
The big bastard smirked at him before alerting Kylie. “You got a visitor.”
Kylie lowered her sketchbook, her eyes going wide when she noticed Logan. He stayed still, just waving.
“Want me to rough him up for ya?” Sin asked, standing up.
She regained her composure and smiled. Not quite the same smile she’d done with him last night—dim, but still pretty. Like his star. “You were the one talking about how cute he is,” she said to Sin.
Sin threw his head back, laughing. “That was our secret.”
Logan chuckled as Sin passed him. “You’re not my type, Sin, but I’m flattered.”
“I’m everyone’s type.” Sin winked at him, lowering his voice. “Hurt her, and I’ll fuck you up.”
It still surprised Logan to see the others so protective of the girls, especially Kylie. He welcomed it, though. She finally had true guardians. “Yeah. I’ll just be a few minutes.”
“I’ll be out here.” Sin patted his shoulder, leaving Logan alone with her.
“You look like hell.” Kylie gave him a dismissive glance before returning to her sketch.
“Feel like it, too.” He walked over, taking the spot Sin had vacated—right next to her. “Sorry I took so long to check on you.”
She darted her eyes over. “You needed to help her. I wasn’t hurt.”
Logan sighed, stretching his legs out but also shifting himself so he wasn’t crowding her. “Still, I meant to check on you sooner.”
“How’s she doing?” she asked, focusing on whatever she was drawing.
“Volatile as always.” He tried not to stare at her, but he couldn’t help it. She looked different, older. Prettier. The scowl she always had whenever Janie was a topic was nowhere in sight. Her face was relaxed, until she’d purse her lips then stick out her tongue during her concentration. It was cute and sexy, and he turned away to keep from staring.
She nodded, still not looking at him. “Sin told me she struggles to find a medium with everything. She’s fire or water, or something like that. Must be hard for her—for all of you.”
“Yeah.” He snatched up the book that Sin had left out: The Art of Seduction. Logan shook his head, tossing it onto the table. “Do you wan
t to talk about what happened?”
“Not really.” She continued working.
“Kylie.” He sighed, waiting for her to look at him. “Nick told me you saw the note.”
“I didn’t see anything.” She swallowed, her pupils dilating.
“You did.” He unclenched his jaw before continuing, “None of us are going to give you or your family up.”
“So you’re going to let more men get killed?” she fired at him, her eyes lighting up with rage. “Or abducted—more animals killed?”
“We’re doing everything we can to make sure nothing else happens,” he said. “But it’s never even come into consideration for anyone to hand you over.”
She teared up. “You didn’t see her before and after that wolf died.”
“She won’t barter you, Hood.” He smiled, reaching over to caress her cheek when a tear slipped free. “I wouldn’t let anyone do that to you or your family. Not even her. But I swear it’s not even an option for her.”
“I didn’t mean she had considered it; I can tell she’s refusing to sacrifice anyone but herself.” She shivered, pushing his hand away before rubbing her cheek. “You don’t have to act like I’m important, you know? I’m not angry you’re with her like you are. I’m glad you have each other, and I’m sorry I intruded on the life you guys have. Just don’t do this.” She waved her hand between them. “It was hard enough with the stars . . . don’t make me feel like I matter more than ensuring you catch Trevor and Kevin. I want them caught, and I’ll do my part to help with it because I don’t want my family hurt.”
Her eyes were red when she looked at him. “Just please leave me alone. I know we both lied, and we were barely together. I know you wish we never happened, but I’m not over you yet. I need space. I can’t have you telling me we exist in the stars and that you won’t let anything happen to me and still heal from everything.”
Logan hadn’t realized his heart was beating like he’d been in a fight, but he covered his chest as he leaned away. “Sorry.”
Her gaze fixed on his hand. “Why do you keep acting like this? I don’t understand.”
“Acting like what?” He took a deep breath, dropping his hand because he felt like a bitch for hurting, and it infuriated him. “Like my heart is being ripped out of my chest every time I realize how badly I hurt you? Like I have fucking missed you every day, no matter how many times I told myself the same shit you just did? Like an absolute piece of shit for using you, for taking something precious from you, then leaving you when you needed someone? What?”
She stared at him, her gorgeous eyes wide and confused, her cheeks flushed as another tear slid down her cheek.
“Fuck.” He turned his head so he didn’t do something stupid. “I care about you. I’ve tried to hate you, to see you as a monster just so I could stop missing you—but you’re always there.” He let out a bitter laugh. “I even use Janie now to distract myself from you. She knows I do, and she lets me, but she gets that little smile like ‘I told you so’ because I keep telling everyone I’m done. I’m not, though.”
“What?” she breathed.
“I’m not asking for anything to start between us, so don’t panic. That’s why I left last night. But don’t say this shit.” He finally turned to meet the stare he felt burning him. So fucking pretty. “Don’t tell me I’m only concerned with using you to catch Trevor and Kevin. Because if it were up to me, I’d take you, just you, and I’d hide you somewhere safe. With me, Hood. You’re important to me—with all the lies, the secrets, the things everyone keeps saying about your soul and mine, all the fucking pain—I choose it just so I can keep a tiny part of you with me, and to keep this real version of you with me.”
He couldn’t believe he was saying any of this, but every word was true. He’d kept it shoved way down all this time, but he couldn’t keep it buried anymore.
Her eyes shimmered with angry but sad tears, and her chin wobbled. Her entire brave front was breaking before him, and it felt like he was receiving the greatest gift to get this glimpse of her. Pretty and vulnerable, wanting to be something she didn’t think was hers to be. He knew she still looked at Janie and envied her. But it wasn’t like before.
He’d caught her watching him with Janie. She’d seen men take orders from her. She’d seen Janie’s vulnerability, and her eyes had shown empathy, not hate.
She was in awe, not jealous or judgmental. Even when it was clear that not only was he very close with Janie but also many of the others, she didn’t scrunch up her face in disgust. The innocent girl he’d imagined her as was nothing compared to the actual young woman sitting before him.
Kylie wanted to understand and support Janie. She wanted to learn how his dear friend was so powerful and fragile because she finally saw the similarities and knew they weren’t bad. She wanted to fight for her sister and her mother. For herself. Now, he could see something else. Kylie wanted to fight for Janie.
“You’re afraid for Janie, aren’t you?” he asked softly.
“I’m afraid for all of you,” she admitted, a pitiful smile dancing across her lips before it died. “I can’t help but feel this is all my fault. And no part of me is worth keeping, Logan. Please let me go so you can be happy with her. I want you happy.”
He reached for her, pulling her onto his lap. Then he hugged her shaking body as she cried.
“I’ve missed you,” she hiccupped, clutching his shirt. “I keep trying to get over you, and I think I am, then I realize all the feelings are still there. You had to go and call me a star. You had to go and tell me she picked you to be with me in the dark.”
Logan chuckled, running his fingers through her hair. It was longer, softer. “I wasn’t lying when I said I missed you. You’re my favorite star, I promise.” He squeezed her gently, breathing in her scent. She had a wild, rebellious smell. Like a wildfire. He couldn’t figure out what the hell that meant, how those were the only words to describe her. She called to him, even more than Janie ever did. It just made little sense to him that he was drawn to her if she was the same soul who destroyed Jane in the stories. But then Janie had put them together in darkness.
“I’m so sorry, Logan.” She pressed her palm over his heart as she tucked her head under his chin. “Whatever I can do to help release you from this obligation to me, I will.”
He tensed up, and it was difficult to be gentle as he leaned away and tilted her chin up to see her face. “My obligations are to Janie, Hood. Trust me, you fall between desire and forbidden.” He cupped her cheek, smiling like a damn fool. “For your sake, I wish I could rid myself of my feelings for you, too, but I’m not like the guys you see around here—able to live by honor alone. Because, believe me when I say this, I ache for you. I don’t deserve any part of you, but that’s the truth I’ve tried to bury all these months.”
His gaze fell to her lips, and he closed his eyes to stop himself from doing something stupid. What he didn’t expect was to feel a pair of perfect lips pressing against his.
He jerked back, unsure if he’d imagined it, but he saw the kiss still lingering on her lips.
“I’m sorry.” She tried to move off his lap.
He stopped her. “Hood, I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I know.” She let her tears fall, looking more beautiful than ever. “I won’t let you. I was just going after what I want.” She gave him a beautiful smile as he sat there, stunned. “I once met a man-boy who offered to help me grow confident so I could do just that. He didn’t know it, but his choice to break my heart so I could find myself was what I needed. Well, him, my family—maybe even his dangerous friends who are fairytale fanatics, and I suppose his ex who may or may not be a goddess.”
Logan laughed as he smoothed her hair back, but she continued.
“Do you really see my star when all others are brighter?”
He searched her eyes, seeing the same dim sparkle. It wasn’t brilliant like Janie’s, but to him, it was perfect. A forgotten light in the dark.
“I do. I think I finally learned to block out the nonsense.” He grinned. “All it took was my best friend casting her light for me to follow, and maybe her boyfriend telling me I was a dumbass.”
She cried but laughed. “Ryder told me—scolded me—about the stars a long time ago. I thought no one would see me.”
“I see you.”
Her eyes welled up. “I see my cocky man-boy all grown up.” She reached up to his face, her fingertips lightly trailing his lips, just like Janie did. Only, where Janie never found what she was looking for in him, Kylie smiled at peace. It warmed his heart because he knew she saw something she wanted. “I mean it, I won’t let you hurt me. I won’t give up my family, and I won’t let you give up yours.”
“Damn, Hood, you just made me swoon.” He grinned as she laughed, and it was the best sound in the world.
“Just tell me one thing,” she said, finally lowering her hand.
“What do you want to know, Miss Confident?”
“Me or Janie?”
“What?” Logan searched her face, hating that he’d done this to himself.
“Me or Janie?”
All his hopes for whatever was happening between them died. “Hood, I won’t choose between you and her. She’s part of my life—forever. She’s my best friend and so much more. That sounds wrong to any woman coming into my life, but I swear, I’m not hopeful things will change between me and her.” He moved his hand to her hair, tugging it. “You’re my little hood, and while I won’t cut her out of my life, I promise I only want to see her happy with Ryder.”
“And me?” She had never looked more certain of herself.
“And you”—he tightened his grip on her hair—“I want to see happy with your family. Safe. And perhaps, one day, under me, moaning my name in ecstasy.”
“Ah, thank God that part of my man-boy stayed even with him growing up.” She chuckled, smiling.
Logan smirked, so ready to kiss her. “Yeah, I can’t give up my horniness.”
“Good.” She patted his cheek. “And I can’t imagine asking you to cut Janie out—not anymore. I wanted you to tell me to go to hell, though I guess—for you guys—she rules it.” She blushed, and he knew she was teasing and not at all a believer. And that was okay. “But you’re gonna wait for me,” she added. “I’m not ready.”
