by Fiona Murphy
She mumbles something I can’t make out.
“What?”
“It’s a go bag.”
I know what a go bag is. However, they’re far more common for people on the run from various law enforcement or criminals, not a civilian like Alicia. They’re what people grab when they need to get out of their location fast, usually cash, clothes, a gun, anything they might need until they could get somewhere safe to regroup. Is there something else she’s keeping from me? “Why in the world do you have a go bag?”
“Don’t you remember after 9/11 when we had all those drills? They said at the time it was a good idea to have a bag packed for clothes and stuff in case we got evacuated and couldn’t get back to our apartment. I thought it was a good idea. Once the boiler went out in the building and I almost checked into a hotel before they got it going again. Then when Bethany went to Mexico to volunteer in a medical clinic, they told her not to put her passport with her other luggage, basically they told her to have a go bag hidden. I added the knife and flashlight after...um, I watched this television show where a guy talked about a go bag.”
“When did you add the vibrator and the lube?”
She rolls her eyes even as she blushes. “When I got a new one. It still works fine. I don’t like throwing things away.”
This is my Alicia, a crazy mix of careful, thoughtful, dreamy all in one package. I tug her to me. “You’re crazy, neurotic, and beautiful, but I’m glad you’re mine.”
Her arms go around my neck to bring me to her mouth. Sweet, so sweet, my sweetness. Gasping, she backs up, her arms still around my neck. “For six long weeks I dreamed of you here with me in this bed. Before I get rid of it, care to make my dreams come true?”
“All you have to do is ask.” I moan into her mouth as I tug at her shirt.
***
Alicia
Listening to the steady thump of Cesare’s heart below my ear, I’m relieved all is right again. Cesare sighs. “Cara, it’s getting late. I don’t want you to be late. You still have to go home and get changed.”
“You’re right. I need to pick up the car from the rental place.”
“No you don’t, Daniel is driving you.”
I sit up. “What? When were you going to tell me? And I can drive myself, I’m a big girl.”
Cesare shakes his head as his hand comes around the back of my neck before yanking me down to inches from his mouth. “There is no need for you to spend the cost on a car when I have three with drivers at my disposal. I feel better knowing Daniel is driving you.”
“Cesare—I—”
“You would deny me the assurance you’re safe?”
He’s driving me crazy. I do not want to fight with him after just making up. “Okay, fine.”
Which is how I find myself being driven to Bethany’s graduation in a fucking limo. Why couldn’t we have used the Town Car? I feel like people are watching when I pull up outside the small apartment complex to pick up Bethany.
She opens the door and we both shriek as we hug each other. It feels like way too long—it’s been since Christmas. Not surprisingly, she lets go before I do. “Okay, Mom, I need to breathe.”
“Oxygen is overrated,” I mumble as I continue to hold her tight.
“Wow, who has the fancy ass limo?”
Letting her go, I groan. “Us. Cesare at his bossy finest.”
“Wow, I really like this guy.”
“Say that now. We’ll see what you think after you meet him tonight. He wants to take us for dinner at the restaurant in the Hancock Building.”
“Ooh la la, which fork do I use for what again?”
“Haha. Oh, but I do have to admit he’s the donor of a part of your graduation present, so I can’t be too mad at him.”
Her face lights up. “Am I getting a limo?”
“No, smartass, how about the weekend in London? Two nights, three days, we go there and back in his private jet.”
She squeals. “Oh my god that is amazing. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Do I have to call him daddy now? I’m okay with that.”
“Such a comedienne you are. Come on, let’s get you to your graduation. It’s time to get the diploma you earned.”
The ceremony takes forever, and I’m grateful for Cesare telling Daniel to stop for lunch as we left Chicago so I could eat on the way. Thankfully Bethany is all packed. As she always does, she’s already sold or given away her bigger items, so she only had three suitcases and four boxes, all of which easily fit in her car. Daniel jumps out of the limo to help us load the boxes. Only an hour after the ceremony is over, we’re headed back to Chicago. I’m in the limo following Bethany’s car.
We stop at my apartment to drop off her suitcases and the car, putting it into the overpriced garage I paid for every month just so we could store the car for three months of the year. She’ll only take one suitcase with her when she goes to Mexico, the rest will be put into storage. She hadn’t taken the time to pack her one suitcase, though, she would do it tonight. I had no idea Cesare has a storage room in the building he owns as big as a two-car garage.
Bethany is a little kid playing with all the buttons and looking at all the liquor in the small cabinet. “Wow, a billionaire. It’s just kind of hitting home now. A billionaire with a fancy jet we’re taking to London for the weekend. So are his brothers single?”
I laugh. “Yes, both of them are. They are also too old for you.”
“No fair. Cesare is nine years older than you.”
“There’s years and there’s experience.”
“Well in that case he’s like ancient and you’re a baby.”
“A baby who gives you your allowance every month, so watch it.”
She sticks out her tongue at me. “Whatever. When are you guys getting married?”
Groaning, my head goes back against the headrest. Trust Bethany to cut right down to the heart of it all. “I have no fucking idea. He’s driving me crazy. He talks as if we’re forever, but he doesn’t actually say the word. He has also never even said he loves me, not even in Italian. I know it in Italian because I looked it up because I’m pathetic.”
“He speaks Italian?”
I close my eyes.
“Okay, yeah, sorry, wrong question. Maybe you should say it first.”
“Are you fucking crazy?”
“No yelling. Don’t yell at me. What really is the worst that could happen? What are you afraid of? You’re saying he talks as if you’re going to be together forever. What, do you think you saying it is going to send him running screaming from the room? I mean, that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. Here’s a guy who has never even had a woman in his home, and he moves you in. Kind of sounds like he loves you to me.” Bethany shrugs as she sniffs a decanter.
“What? He’s never had a woman in the condo? How the hell do you know that?”
“Claudine called me to get my schedule and likes and dislikes for food or if I had any allergies. She thought I was going to stay with you guys over the summer. We got to talking. I like her, she’s nice.”
I can’t believe I didn’t know that. I’ve never asked, too afraid to know about the women in Cesare’s past, hating every single one of them for ever touching him. Daniel parks illegally as we get a doorman to help with Bethany’s boxes. These guys are amazing, they pull out a flatbed dolly that holds all the boxes. Only one of them comes up with us to unload it. I show him to my room to unload them in the walk-in closet.
Bethany whistles. “Holy crap on a cracker this place is insane. I can’t believe you live here. You picked all this stuff out?”
Laughing, I follow her around. “Yes. I did have help. There were a few times I flinched at the cost of some things. But the decorators wouldn’t let me pass on something that fit because of the cost. Cesare agreed—the man really doesn’t care about the price of things.”
“Only you would think that’s a bad thing.”
Shrugging, I sigh. “I don’t want him thinking he gets hi
s way with money.”
“But does he try to? You called the guy a workaholic, yet he’s spent almost every Saturday since you moved in here with you. Am I missing something? You talk about going to places like the Art Institute, which is your favorite place in the city, and the Shedd, which is your second favorite, and having dinner at home with his brothers, not shopping or fancy-schmancy places. Are you going to awesome places and not telling me, or is he buying you jewelry and you haven’t told me?”
“No, no fancy places. He did suggest shopping, but I nipped that in the bud.” I blush as I remember the diamond-encrusted watch he tried to give me. He wasn’t happy when I refused it. I wasn’t happy he gave it to me after a small squabble about him working on a Saturday. There was no way he was going to use money to smooth things over in our relationship. I remembered all too clearly Dante’s speech and Jeanine saying he stole it from Cesare. Cesare promised he wouldn’t, and admitted he was afraid of even buying me something sparkly for my birthday in a few weeks as he asked me what I wanted. I told him I needed time to think about it, but I already knew, I was just trying to work it out with Dante.
Bethany checks her phone. “It’s almost five, I’m starving. Is there something I can snack on? When are we going to dinner?”
“Yeah, of course, let’s find you something. Cesare says the reservation is for seven. Is that okay?”
“Ehh, yeah, but I have to admit I’m already tired, so after dinner would it be okay if you guys took me back to the apartment?”
“Sure. Get plenty of sleep. We leave tomorrow at nine.”
“I’m so excited.”
22
Alicia
Cesare is kissing me awake, which is the way I like to be woken most. Only I’m still exhausted from a long night of lovemaking. “You are insatiable,” I mutter as his cock nudges inside me.
“You’re going to be gone for three days. I need you, cara.”
Mm, I can’t tell him no, then he’s inside me and I don’t want to tell him no. Last night as I fell asleep in his arms, I felt a moment of panic at the idea of not falling asleep with the feel of him against me. It didn’t matter we already made love in the shower, then again once he carried me to bed. Need overtook me, and I climbed on top of him until we both came again. This time I begged to fall asleep with him inside me. Best sleep ever.
Slow, so slowly and gently, he takes me to heaven. We lie together, me clinging to him, not letting him go. “I’m sorry I’m going away. I’m going to miss you while I’m gone.”
He lifts his head and brushes his lips against mine. “At least I’ll get work done while you’re gone.”
I sigh in exasperation. “If you start spending all day in the office I’m going to be pissed. You aren’t undoing all the hard work I put into you. I mean it, Cesare. Please.”
Nodding, he rolls off the bed, taking me with him. “Yes, my dear. Come on, I just saw the time. I’m going to be late.”
An hour later I’m kissing him goodbye with a sigh. A text comes through from Bethany telling me she’s ready, and she’s running down to the corner for breakfast in case I come when she’s gone. Oops, I’m running a little behind, at least my suitcase is already packed.
Bethany bounces into the limo. “I love Cesare. He’s so awesome. I can’t believe he got me the coolest gift ever. A trip to London on a jet and a pink crystal-encrusted Littmann stethoscope. How did he know I wanted one?”
“He found your Pinterest board.”
“Huh, I thought my board was set to private.”
I laugh. “That doesn’t stop Cesare.”
“Ohh, that’s kinda cool, actually.”
Once we land in London, after checking into an ultra-posh hotel Cesare had Hannah book us, we hit the ground running.
I had texted Cesare the minute we landed as he instructed. His response was immediate, telling me to have fun but not too much fun.
Over the next few days we text daily, but the nights are hell, for the both of us. With the time difference it isn’t easy to talk at the beginning of the day or at night when we want to the most. Bethany and I fill the days to bursting, roaming around the Tate Modern, visiting the Tower of London, Buckingham Palace, and riding the Eye so many times I sat the last visit out. We had to buy another suitcase to hold all the stuff we got at the Camden Market, for the first time it was nice to be able to buy what we wanted without hunting for the price tag. With my new salary and not having as many bills since I moved in with Cesare there were times I couldn’t believe the balance in my checking account was real. Although I do feel guilty Cesare paid for the hotel. I tried to argue but he said it was his gift to Bethany as a part of her graduation present. I hate arguing with him so I let it go.
On our last day we make a last trip out for brunch before heading to the airport. I’m as excited to go home as I was at the idea of the trip here.
Dropping off Bethany at the apartment, we say a tearful goodbye. She has to be up early tomorrow to make her flight. Cesare offered the jet to take her onto Mexico. While Bethany wanted to accept, she felt guilty the charity had already paid for her plane ticket and declined.
As I walk through the front door, the sight of Cesare, his eyes full of relief, his face dark with intent, has my stomach flipping and heat flaring low. I don’t even get to open my mouth before catches me around the middle and hauls me over his shoulder.
Joy fills me until I swear I might explode from it as the world is flipped upside down. “You missed me too?”
“Woman, you’re never going away again. Next time I’m going with you,” Cesare growls.
“Funny you should say that. I know what I want my birthday present to be.” I laugh as I’m tossed down on the bed. He tears off his clothes. His eyebrow goes up.
“Anything you want, you get. We’ll talk about it later, my love. Much later.”
The sun is setting before I’m able to lift my head from Cesare’s chest. I run a finger over his lips. His eyes open to look down on me.
“I mean it. The next time you leave, I’m going with you.”
I nod. “I don’t think I slept the whole night through when I was gone. I hated it. I missed you so much, a half a dozen times a day I wanted to look to my side and share what I was seeing with you.”
“I didn’t get any sleep either. Dante is mad at me. He was glad to see the back of me when I left today.”
“Yeah, he said as much.”
“You talked to him already?”
“Yep, he texted me to let me know he’d made the arrangements at work for my birthday gift.”
Cesare is wary. “So what is your birthday gift?”
“You and me for five days in Venice. No work, no cell phones, just us and the amazing city of canals. Long days of sightseeing and longer nights of lovemaking.”
His face gives nothing away. I’m beginning to worry he hates the idea when he moves, dragging me up his chest to kiss me until I’m dizzy. “Anything you want, cara, all you have to do is ask.”
***
Cesare
As the plane takes off, a little sigh escapes Alicia. I don’t hesitate to pull her into my arms. She melts into me.
“Thank you for the most incredible birthday I’ve ever had.”
“You’re welcome for the most incredible five days I’ve ever had.” And it really had been. I spent a summer in Sicily with my family when I was fifteen, my father wanted us to know where we came from. Other than a few weekends in Paris or Rome, both times to please the women I was fucking, without ever leaving the hotel I didn’t do much traveling. Dante was the one who wanted to buy the jet, he loved taking women away for the weekend or a week for fun. Since I was often in New York for a client I shrugged and went in on the purchase with him and Enzo. Enzo used it for business to check out investments.
After the last week of roaming the streets of Venice with Alicia’s eyes full of wonder, hearing her gasps of awe and delight at each new thing she saw I loved watching her beautiful, e
xpressive face and I can’t wait to make her this happy again. From Saint Mark’s Basilica, to the Museo Civico Correr, the Guggenheim, and even two trips to Teatro Le Fenice I didn’t even consider leaving until Alicia had soaked everything in to her heart’s content. She loved hearing me speak Italian, the way I whispered what was happening in the opera we watched in a private box where I found out the wanton witch wasn’t wearing panties.
I can admit when she told me I saw it as something I would have to endure to make her happy but it became so much more than that. Her happiness was a vibrant glow I want to see again and again. I’m already wondering where she would like to go next.
“I’m so proud of you. Five whole days without a single check-in with Dante or Hannah about work. You didn’t even go through the shakes or anything.”
“It wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. Then again, having your complete and total attention was a lot like replacing one addiction with another.”
Her blush has me chuckling. “That’s funny—a few times I’ve thought of you as an addiction.” She shakes her head. “At least it’s not just me.”
“Did you have any doubt?” She shrugs. Shit, not this again. “I’m sorry. Undoing the thought process of almost thirty years isn’t easy. You’re this disgustingly rich, insanely gorgeous man. And I’m me. You say I’m beautiful, but let’s be real, I’m pretty at best. I have no special skills or...anything.”
I hate the way her eyes are filled with shadows. “I wouldn’t say you have no special skills. No other woman has ever sucked my cock better than you.” She rolls her eyes even as she smiles. “I’ll keep telling you so you can start changing that thought process: don’t listen to that shitty inner voice, listen to my voice. My voice is the only one that counts.”
