by Fine, L. J.
“Maybe we should get out of here,” she said resting her hands on his chest and pushing away a fraction.
“Why?” He frowned, tugging her back into him.
“Umm,” she cleared her throat. “I think your brother had plans tonight. I’m sure he doesn’t want to hang around babysitting us.”
For that, she got a full-on smile. Good grief, the man was beautiful when he smiled. She would never get over it. “He did have plans but don’t worry. His babysitting duties ended when I got here.”
She cocked an eyebrow. “He left?”
Moving his hand up to cup her jaw, he gave her a soft kiss before he said, “He left. Besides, we could stay here all night and he wouldn’t care.” He kissed her again, giving her another smile, this one a little wicked around the edges. “Actually, he probably won’t be back tonight anyway.”
She could only shake her head. Adam really was a man-whore.
“Okay.” She pushed away from him again. “Let’s at least get up off the floor.”
He let her move through his arms until she stood in front of him. She held out her hand to him and he took it, pulling himself up then once again pulling her off balance as he tugged her toward the bed.
“Lie down with me for a little while, Sugar.” The grin he shot her was at once adorable and mischievously sexy. How did he even do that? “I wanna cuddle with you.”
Wow, really? He didn’t have to tell her twice. Willingly, she went when he pulled her down onto the mattress. They lay on their sides facing each other. He hooked her leg on top of his and put his body as close to hers as humanly possible. Obviously, he welcomed no space between them and a thrill of satisfaction went through her at the knowledge.
With a hand on her jaw, he titled her head as his lips found hers. This kiss was slow and thorough. He took his time exploring her mouth, tongue sliding against hers, causing her to hum in approval against his lips.
Time seemed to slow as they lay there, kissing and touching, their strokes lazy and unhurried. This felt more like a languid meandering that fulfilled his need to hold her more than it did a seduction. Emma had never been more contended in her life. The man liked to kiss her and in no way was she complaining. But, as much as she was enjoying this, there were still a few things they needed to sort out before she could get too comfortable.
“Ben,” she said, softly breaking their gentle kiss. “You should know that this means more to me than just casual sex.” She almost hated to break the mood but she needed to get this out there. For her own sanity and wellbeing, she needed to finish the conversation they had started that morning. Her conscience wouldn’t let her go on with him thinking that this was something it wasn’t, or that it was as simple as it had started. It had all become dangerously complicated for her and he deserved to know that. “This is the last thing you probably want to hear right now, but I needed to tell you where I stood.”
Closing his eyes, he buried his face in her neck. The feeling of his soft lips trailing kisses against her skin surprised her considering her declaration. Was he going to ignore her words and pretend she had never said them?
Maybe she shouldn’t have said them because his silence in their wake was ruining the mood for her. How could you cuddle with someone you knew didn’t care about you? No, she should have kept her mouth shut.
Honestly, she didn’t know what she had expected him to say. He had been clear with her that morning about this very thing and she definitely shouldn’t be lying here in his arms making things that much harder for herself. Compartmentalizing what they were doing was an impossible task for her. She was about to say something to take the pressure off him when he pulled back to look at her.
“Then you should know that I want more from you than just your sex, Emma.”
Wait. Did she hear that right? “Then why did you tell me this morning that you didn’t want to complicate things?”
Rolling onto his back with a sigh, he stared up at the ceiling as though looking for the right words. In the end, he settled with,” I was being an asshole this morning.”
Despite the situation, she had to laugh. “Good, it wasn’t just in my head then.”
He narrowed his eyes on her but she could see the corner of his mouth twitch. “You caught me off guard with your ‘what are we doing’ question and I went into self-preservation mode.” The look in his eyes turned uncertain as he regarded her cautiously.
“Self-preservation mode? Like you had to protect yourself from me?” If anything, she would have thought it would be the other way around. It was her heart that had the most likelihood of being trampled in this equation. But maybe she had read him wrong?
“Yeah, I did. Please remember the basis of our hookup. You had a problem writing sex scenes and basically only wanted experiences that you could pour into your book. It didn’t start off all hearts and flowers for us. Besides that, you were only gonna be here for a few weeks. I didn’t think you wanted anything more from me.”
It was her turn to roll onto her back and stare up at the ceiling. Shit, when he spelled it out like that she didn’t blame him for thinking he needed to keep any emotions he might be having to himself. He probably thought her question this morning was about her worrying he had developed feelings for her. Instead of what it actually was: her developing feelings for him. “I feel like such a user.”
“No,” he said turning onto his side to face her and gently pulling on her hip to make her do the same. “You didn’t use me. Believe me, Sugar, I was more than willing. I –” He shook his head and licked his lips. It was like his tongue was a magnet that drew her eyes to track its movement. He had the sexiest mouth she had ever seen and even now, when she was so interested in what he had to say, he was capable of distracting her without really trying. It disconcerted her. “Things are different with you, Emma. I’m different with you. Have been since I first saw you.”
That had her eyes snapping back to his. “Different how?”
And from the beginning? Up until a few days ago, he had been standoffish and she had assumed that was his status quo. Or maybe it was all part of his plan to protect himself from her. Just the thought of him feeling like that seemed absurd. But she understood. If she were in his position she probably would have done the same.
“I can’t explain it.” He reached out to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “There’s something about you that makes me feel…possessive. From the day we met in the bookstore, I wanted to mark you as mine in some way. Even though I didn’t think I could actually make you mine, the impulse was still there.”
“And you did, too, didn’t you?” He had never used a condom with her. Not once. She had definitely wondered about that but wouldn’t let herself dwell on it too long even though she knew she should have.
From the way his eyes darkened and he shifted beside her, she could tell he knew what she was referring to. “Yeah, I did.”
The simple statement coupled with the hard length of him she could feel digging into her belly, sent her mind reeling. Obviously, it turned him on thinking about coming inside her and his sense of proprietorship over her body made her flush hot all over.
“I’ve never done that with anyone before. Only you,” he whispered.
“I haven’t either, actually. Just you.” If possible, his amber eyes got darker, turning almost black.
“Good, keep it that way,” he rumbled, his deep voice lowering about an octave. Oh my. He really was possessive of her, wasn’t he? She smiled to herself.
“What’s with the cute little smile on your face, Sugar?” he asked with a little smile of his own as he circled her nose with his.
It made her smile wider. “I know you’re all uncomfortable with this, but I like that you’re possessive of me.”
He blew out a breath on a shaky laugh. “I’m glad you like it. It scares the shit out of me, though.”
Emma pulled back to look at him. “Why does it scare you?”
She wouldn’t hurt him. Surel
y he knew that by now.
“When I’m with you, all I wanna do is lock the rest of the world out. Wrap myself up in you and live in our own little cocoon of make believe. It scares me because I know we can’t stay there. Sooner or later, my fucked up reality is gonna touch you, like it did tonight. Thank God Adam was there.” His grip on her body tightened and he pulled her closer as though trying to shield her from what happened. “I didn’t want to think about all the shit with Paul anymore. I didn’t want it to touch us and what we have. But I know that’s not possible.”
“But it is possible.” She caught his gaze and held it, hoping her sincerity would register. “What we have doesn’t have to be make believe, Ben. We can make it real. More real than your past and what these people think of you ever was.”
“Fuck, I hope you’re right.” He pulled her into him so that her cheek rested on his chest. “Because I don’t think I can let you go.”
It amazed her as the realization hit that somehow she had been the one to get under his skin. The thing that set her apart from everyone else he knew was her complete acceptance of him. That was the quality she possessed that tied him to her and she wouldn’t give that up for the world.
Holding onto him tighter, she snuggled into him and whispered, “I don’t want you to let go.”
The familiar feeling of Ben’s body wrapped around her was the first thing Emma registered when she opened her eyes. The room was dark and quiet and a quick glance at the digital clock on the nightstand told her that it was going on four a.m. Snuggling back into Ben’s warmth, she wondered what had woken her.
Then she felt it again.
Ben shifted restlessly behind her. Grunting in his sleep, he pulled her closer, her back to his front as one of his knees slid between her thighs. She wanted to turn in his arms to make sure he was okay, but his tight hold on her prevented her from doing so.
As she was about to pry his arms off her to wiggle free, she felt his soft, velvet lips begin to run kisses along the back of her neck. Slowly, a warm, callused hand slipped beneath her shirt to cup her breast. Instantly, she knew he was awake and when he rolled his hips into her ass, she realized he was awake in more ways than one.
“Mmm,” he rumbled into her ear, breathing her in. “You smell good.” He tugged on the cup of her bra, pulling it down to let her breast spill free into his palm. “You feel even better, Sugar.”
Rocking back into his gently thrusting hips, she whispered, “So do you.”
And, oh fuck, he did. She could get used to waking up like this.
He rolled and tugged on her nipple before skimming his hand down her side and into the front of her jeans. His meandering lips caressed her jaw and she turned to capture them with her mouth as he popped her jeans open. Deft fingers slid inside and down the front of her panties, the first touch to her swollen clit making her jerk into him. He growled into her mouth.
“I fucking love how wet you get for me, Emma.” He demonstrated his point by sliding his fingers through her slippery slit. If he didn’t take so much obvious pleasure in it, she might be embarrassed by just how wet he made her. Her panties had gotten completely soaked and she could feel the moisture coating her thighs as he slid two thick fingers easily inside her. She pulled her mouth from him and groaned at the fullness of his invasion.
He pumped her a few times then slowly pulled his fingers free and brought the wet tips up to her aching nub, rubbing it in torturous circles. She couldn’t stop her hips from rotating and grinding down on his hand any more than she could stop her erratic breath from hitching in her throat. He felt too damn good. The movement of her hips sped up as her muscles tightened with her impending orgasm. The feel of his wet tongue sliding up the side of her neck had her turning her face into her arm on a moan, granting him better access.
“You gonna come?” The husky tone of his voice hit her ear as he nipped at her lobe, making her shiver.
“Yes,” she hissed when he increased the pressure of his fingers. But as soon as the word left her mouth, his movements ceased. “No, don’t stop,” she pleaded. She had been so close and when he stopped, her climb up that hill stopped with him, leaving her suspended in the air.
Lightning quick, he gently slapped her pussy, making her yelp, but the sting had a surprisingly pleasant aftershock.
“Don’t come until I say you can,” he growled before pulling away and rolling onto his back.
She took her cue and followed, turning to face him. When he gripped her thigh and pulled her over his hips to straddle him, she didn’t fight. Instead, she sat up and pulled her shirt over her head. That wicked tongue of his came out to glide along his bottom lip and his eyes narrowed to lust filled slits as he took her in.
Rocking her mound down onto his erection, she slid her hands beneath his t-shirt and glided them upward. The muscles of his abdomen bunched and contracted as he moved and she savored the feel of his hot skin under her palms. His hips jerked up into her, nearly taking her knees from the bed when she raked her nails along his chest and over his nipples.
Suddenly, he sat up, yanking his shirt over his head before taking control of her mouth. His talented fingers snapped the clasp of her bra loose and she slipped it down her arms and off when the wet heat of his mouth broke from hers and enveloped a nipple.
“Ben,” she moaned, writhing on top of him and digging her fingers in his hair to pull him closer.
The index finger of his right hand trailed down her spine, leaving goose bumps in its wake before he shoved his hand down the back of her loosened jeans and into her panties. She cried out and rocked her hips harder into his when his fingers lightly rubbed over the rosebud of her back entrance.
“Someday soon, Emma, I’m gonna take you here.” He nipped her throat before using his free hand to pull her chin down, forcing her to look him in the eye. The raw ownership she saw in his gaze had her breath catching. “I want you to feel me everywhere, Sugar.” He rubbed, giving her a little more pressure and she gasped and clung to him. “Soon,” he promised darkly before slipping his fingers lower through her wetness to find her dripping opening from behind.
Without warning, he thrust two fingers inside her and she bucked into him. If she rocked her hips forward just right, her clit rubbed up against the hardness of his cock contained by his jeans. Each time she hit it a shiver went right through her. Soon he was fucking his fingers into her in time to the rolling movements of her hips and she could feel herself climbing back up that hill.
His teeth nipped her chin, making her tilt her head down so his lips could graze hers.
“You about to come?” He murmured against her lips and just hearing the world ‘come’ in his deep voice had her flesh pulsing and her hips jerking into him. “What did I tell you, baby?”
The way he dragged his teeth slowly across her bottom lip and the feel of his fingers pumping in and out of her pussy made coherent thought a little challenging. His mouth found her breast and his teeth tugged at her nipple, wringing a cry from her throat. “What was the rule, Emma?”
“Don’t –” It was hard to get enough air into her lungs to form those two tiny words he wanted to hear. This time his teeth bit down on her other nipple and the words rushed out. “Don’t come.”
It was reminder to her as much as it was an answer to his question.
“Mmm, that’s right.” The vibrations of his voice against her sensitive skin and the twisting thrusts his fingers had now started made it nearly impossible to obey him. “When can you come, baby?”
“Ben, please,” she panted, fisting her fingers in his hair as she ground her hips into him. She didn’t know how much longer she would be able to hold on.
The fingers of his free hand came up to tangle in her hair, forcefully pulling her head back and stretching her neck in a tight arch.
“When?” He growled against her throat.
Oh how she loved his dominant side, the way he owned her body and he damn well knew it. Used it to his advantage.
“Not until you tell me to.” Her voice came out broken and hoarse. Fuck, he’d better hurry up and tell her to or she might come anyway. She shivered at the thought of what he might do to her then.
As if sensing her thoughts, he chuckled low in his throat and said, “Good girl,” then promptly pulled out of her.
The hand that drifted up her back that she supposed was meant to be soothing, failed dangerously short of its purpose. The growl of frustration that emanated from her then was a sound she had never heard herself make before. Wanting to wipe that smug little smile off his face, she pushed all of her weight forward, knocking him off balance. Before his back could hit the mattress, though, he had her flipped around so that she ended up beneath his big body. That smug smile turned into a grin.
“Be patent, Sugar.” He kissed her lips softly. “I’ll get you there.”
Oh, no doubt in her mind that he would, but he took his sweet time about it. She went to bite him and he pulled back with a laugh. Of all the times for him to show his playful side, it had to be now? When she wanted him so bad she thought she would explode?
But then he stood up to push his jeans down his legs and off. All of her irritation evaporated when his thick cock sprang free, a bead of pre-cum leaking from the angry red tip. He wanted her just as bad and that somehow made this easier.
Grabbing her ankles, he dragged her down the bed until his fingers had access to the top of her jeans. He tugged and she obligingly lifted her hips so he could pull them, along with her panties, off.
“Do you want me, Emma?” His warm, rough hands slid up her legs, spreading them wider when he got to her inner thighs. “You wanna feel me inside you?”
When he crawled up the bed to hover over her, she curled her fingers around his upper arms that braced his weight against the mattress, trying to pull him forward onto her. She needed to feel his skin sliding against hers, needed him to cover her and surround her with his heat.
She just needed him.
The muscles of his arms tensed under her touch and he resisted her tugging. Instead, he caught her hands in his and pinned them above her head. So, in the end, she got what she wanted anyway.
