by Unknown
I hated my mum treating me this way. I was twelve, not six. I sulked as I stared up at the dusky sky through the trees, copying what Dee was doing.
‘Her boyfriend snuck around to the house about half an hour after Mum left. I told her I had loads of homework to be getting on with and needed to be left in peace in my bedroom to do it. I said I’d see her tomorrow morning at breakfast. I think she was relieved to be left alone with him.’
Dee turned to look at me, a look of admiration on her tanned face. ‘And she believed you?’
‘Yup.’
‘Fab.’
We floated silently in the cool water after our tedious day spent in a humid classroom. I was almost dozing off when she splashed me. The shock made me sink slightly, so that I swallowed a mouthful of water. I frantically attempted to clear my airways.
‘What did you do that for?’ I eventually managed to splutter.
‘Sorry.’ She grabbed hold of me and helped me swim to the side of the pool. ‘I had a thought.’
We both giggled, amused that her thought had caused me to almost drown. I grabbed my towel and sat on it, patting the space next to me for her to join me. ‘Go on then, spill.’
She raised her shoulders and gave a little squeal. ‘Why don’t we ask your mum if you can come and stay with us every time she goes on location?’ She gave a satisfied grin. ‘Brilliant idea, don’t you think?’
I shook my head. ‘She’ll never go for it. You know odd she is about Hazel.’
‘I suppose my mum is very different to yours, but it doesn’t mean that you won’t be looked after. We’ll just have to work on her and persuade her it’s the best option.’ She thought for a moment. ‘We could tell her how much money she’d save by not hiring nannies for you so often.’
I grimaced. ‘Nah, she’d hate anyone to think she didn’t have money. No, it’ll have to be something else. But what?’
Dee hugged me. ‘We’ll think of something. Imagine you being able to stay at my house night after night, it would be fun. We could have midnight feasts at midnight.’
I laughed. ‘Not at seven-thirty in the evening, you mean?’
‘Yes. And we could sneak out and meet boys.’
I pushed her so hard she fell backwards, leaves from the ground getting caught in her damp hair. ‘We don’t know any boys, silly,’ I said, wishing we had the nerve to do as she suggested. ‘Only the stupid ones from school.’
‘True, but we could meet some if we sneaked into the village at night.’ She lowered her voice despite us being alone.. ‘I heard that Frankie was caught snogging Steve by the bins near the chippie the other night.’
‘No, really?’ I didn’t like Frankie very much, she was often spiteful and teased me about not having a dad, but I couldn’t help being impressed by this news.
‘It would be fun. We just have to think of a way to get your mum to agree.’
I had to admit I liked this plan of hers. Staying at the farm and sharing Dee’s bright bedroom would be much more fun than having to make small talk to an endless round of babysitters. ‘What about Hazel? We’d need to ask her permission first.’
She shrugged. ‘You know my mum would love you to stay with us. Especially if it kept me quiet and out of her way.’
This was true. ‘Fine then, we’ll make a plan. I’ll hint to my mum when she gets back.’
* * *
Just as I’d expected, my mother’s initial reaction had been one of horror. She looked over her shoulder as if expecting to find someone lurking there. I was used to this odd behaviour. She’d always worried about strangers and checking doors were locked even when it was the middle of the day and the house was busy with people. In fact, I was sure that her slightly neurotic manner was the reason I pushed myself to be more open and trusting of others.
‘Leave you in the care of that mad woman and her wild family? I don’t think so, Sera.’
‘Why not?’ I said. ‘At least there’s someone to have fun with there. You’re always learning lines. Why don’t you talk to me? We could spend more time together and you could tell me something about your family, or—’ I braced myself for her tone to change ‘—you could tell me a bit about my father.’
‘No.’
‘But…’
Mum’s expression changed to one of irritation. ‘But, nothing.’
For once I didn’t care about her issues. It irritated me that she had this unspoken rule never to talk about her life before Oakwold, and never to mention Hazel’s name. It was ridiculous and I’d had enough.
‘If you met her and tried to get to know her you’d probably get on well,’ I argued. ‘She’s kind and funny.’ I laughed, picturing Hazel’s silly antics. ‘And she’s an incredible singer…’
‘Shut up,’ Mum bellowed. ‘You don’t know her.’
‘I do,’ I shouted, confused. I bent towards her, hating her at that moment. ‘Hazel’s much nicer than you.’
Grabbing me by the shoulders, she shook me so hard my neck hurt.
I cried out, shocked by the uncharacteristic violence of her reaction. The loathing in her face scared me. I writhed away from her, frightened.
‘I hate you,’ I shrieked, running away from her to the safety of my bedroom.
‘Hazel isn’t the perfect person you think, Sera,’ she screamed, as I slammed the door.
Chapter Five
1990 – London
Mimi
The pretty girl with the wild strawberry blonde hair dropped her faded denim jacket onto the chair and held out her hand. ‘Hi, I’m Hazel.’
I couldn’t understand why she looked so pleased with herself. This crummy guesthouse I’d found through a newspaper ad was even worse than I’d imagined. I was relieved my mum and sister couldn’t see where I was intending to live.
‘I only got here a month ago,’ Hazel added, snapping my thoughts back to the present. ‘I don’t know many people yet.’
‘I’m Mimi,’ I said trying to look friendlier than I felt. ‘I’m an actress. I’m eighteen.’
‘Me, too,’ she giggled. ‘Eighteen, that is, not an actress,’ Hazel giggled again. She reminded me of an over-excited puppy. ‘Where’ve you come from?’
‘Dalingbrook, it’s a small village near Northampton.’ That would be the last time I’d mention where I grew up, I decided, wishing I hadn’t told her. ‘You?’
‘York,’ she said beaming at me. She whooped in delight, her hair bouncing around her cherubic face.
I stifled a groan. I’d hoped to escape childish friends, but it looked as if I was going to end up having to spend my nights sharing a room with one.
‘I’m a singer,’ she said. ‘Have you acted in anything I might have seen?’
‘Nothing much. Not yet anyway. That’s why I’ve come to London. I want to make a name for myself.’
Hazel clapped her small hands in delight. ‘Me too. Oh, I knew we’d be great friends.’
I wished I shared her enthusiasm. ‘Is that my bed?’ I asked, looking at the one covered with an array of discarded clothing.
Hazel nodded, her face reddening. ‘Sorry, I’ve always been a messy bugger. Let me move them.’ She scraped the clothes together and dumped them onto her creased sheets.
Hazel beamed at me. ‘We’re going to get along well, I can tell.’
Could she? I wasn’t so sure.
‘Do you have any contacts here yet?’ I asked, thinking that I may as well make the most of having to put up with this messy girl.
She pursed her lips together. ‘There’s a party tonight at a club in Soho. I’ve been invited by this really cool guy who runs it. Vince. He owns a few bars and nightclubs. It’s where all his theatre-type friends hang out.’
My mood lifted immediately. This was more like it. I might finally meet some famous people. I sat heavily on my newly cleared bed. ‘Really?’
She nodded enthusiastically. ‘Yeah, there are actors and singers and their agents go there, too.’
‘Theatrical a
gents?’
‘Yes.’ She lowered her voice to a whisper. ‘I heard that Vince grew up in the East End and until a couple of years ago ran things for this older guy.’
‘What happened to him?’
‘He died,’ Hazel said staring out of the window briefly.
‘How?’
‘Look, I don’t know all right? No one talks about it.’
My stomach fluttered nervously. ‘He sounds a bit dodgy, if you ask me.’
Hazel pushed my shoulder playfully. ‘He’s great,’ she laughed, but it seemed forced. I wondered if maybe she was panicking that I might repeat what she had told me. ‘He’s always immaculately dressed,’ she added, if that made up for any shortcomings in his character. ‘If someone upsets him, though, he fires them and sees to it that none of the other clubs will employ them.’
I wasn’t sure he sounded like the sort of person I wanted to get to know, but it wasn’t as if I knew of anyone better.
Hazel pulled a face. ‘I think that if they’re stupid enough to cross him then it serves them right.’
I decided that if Hazel had the connections to help my future I wasn’t going to annoy her by arguing.
‘Do you think he’d mind if I came to the party?’
‘Yeah, course you can. He said to bring a friend.’ She sighed dreamily. ‘He’s a real hunk, you’ll love him; everyone does.’ Her pale cheeks reddened.
‘I’ll let you know what I think when I meet him.’
‘Have you got a boyfriend back home?’ Hazel asked.
I shook my head. I wasn’t going to admit that I’d never had a boyfriend. One quick snog after a local church dance was all I’d experienced up until now. And that had been short-lived when my mother appeared from the shadows to shout at him.
‘What time do we have to be at the party?’ I said, changing the subject.
Hazel smiled. ‘Any time after nine, so we’ve got hours yet. Time for you to unpack.’
‘Time for me to try and find a job,’ I said.
She thought for a moment. ‘We can ask around. I’m working as a waitress in Dave’s Diner,’ she laughed. ‘It’s a greasy café down the road and they pay a pittance, but it’s a job. I’m hoping to make a contact at this party and then I can give in my notice. Maybe Vince can get me a singing job at one of the clubs.’
Vince was sounding better and better. ‘Maybe he might know someone who could help me?’ I suggested hopefully.
* * *
Later that evening, we entered the club, the dark red walls giving a feeling of depth that was impossible to decipher. The flashing lights from the stage drew my eyes to the glamorous woman singing with the band. There was so much to gaze at that I almost forgot how my feet ached from traipsing around London looking for work.
I sucked in my non-existent stomach, trying my best to exude confidence. I didn’t know if it was excitement or nerves, but my legs felt like they were made of cotton wool. I followed Hazel, noting that every woman we passed, beautiful or not, was immaculately made-up. This was a totally different world to the one we’d just left outside. The smartly dressed men lurking in the shadows appeared smooth and a little intense. They seemed to sense our naivety, as if they could smell it. None of them bothered to conceal their approval of Hazel and me as they exhaled smoke from their cigarettes and drank champagne. It was as if they were evaluating our worth in some way.
Hazel stopped in front of a small group, waiting for them to notice her. One of the women, a tall blonde, threw her head back in laughter. She almost spilled the pink cocktail she was holding in one manicured hand down a man’s suit. He flinched, pushing her other arm from his broad shoulders. Then, glaring at her, he bent his head next to hers and whispered something I couldn’t make out. She lowered her head briefly, and then raised it, a fixed smile on her face. I couldn’t miss how her large eyes glistened suspiciously.
As if he sensed me staring at him, he turned to face us. The others in his group stepped back to clear his line of vision.
Hazel nudged me so I assumed this tall man, wearing a tailored, steel-grey suit, must be Vince. He had a self-assured air about him that I had never witnessed before.
Suddenly breathless, I cleared my throat as his deep blue eyes connected with mine. He was mesmerising. His dark, almost black, hair was shorter than the other men’s in the club; his tanned face set his perfect white teeth off to perfection. It was easy to understand why she liked him. He watched me silently. I blushed under his intense scrutiny.
‘Mimi,’ Hazel snapped, glaring at me.
He motioned for us to step forward.
Hazel took me by the arm and pulled me over to stand in front of him. I jerked my arm from her grasp, and smiled.
‘Vince,’ Hazel said, her smile not reaching her eyes. ‘This is Mimi, she’s my flatmate.’
Flatmate? We shared a box room, but, hey, if she wanted to give them a more upmarket impression of us then who was I to argue.
Vince held out his hand without taking his eyes off me. I shook it, still holding his gaze and did my best not to feel intimidated by the blonde he had pushed away seconds before who now glared at me. She raised her arm, resting it on his shoulder. He stepped closer to me and her arm dropped.
‘Mimi,’ he said, saying my name slowly in a rich, deep voice. ‘It’s good to meet you.’ His grasp tightened on my hand and pulled me gently into his group. Then, putting one arm around my waist and the other around Hazel’s, he led us towards the bar. ‘You, gorgeous ladies, are coming with me. We could do with some fresh faces around.’
I heard laughter behind me and thought someone said, ‘Fresh meat,’ but ignored them and exchanged delighted glances with Hazel. We had arrived.
‘I think you both need a drink and proper introduction to this place.’
Hazel giggled.
‘Is this your first time in London?’
‘Yes,’ I said, desperate to appear sophisticated like the blonde woman. He seemed too worldly to be fooled by any façade, however.
Vincee caught the attention of the barman. ‘A bottle of champagne and four glasses, Joe.’ Then he turned back to me. ‘So, what have you come to this vibrant capital for, Mimi?’
‘She’s an actress,’ Hazel chirped before I had time to reply. ‘She’s looking for work and we thought maybe you could help her find something?’
I glared at her. I didn’t want Vince to think I was too shy to speak for myself.
‘Hey, it’s okay,’ he said spotting my reaction. ‘She’s right to tell me. I always do my best to help friends.’
‘Friends?’ I asked, laughing a little too loudly. It was partly out of relief that he liked me, but also because I had never received such rapt attention from any man before, let alone one as charismatic as Vince. ‘But we only met five minutes ago.’
The tanned skin around his dark blue eyes crinkled in amusement. ‘Maybe, but we’ll soon get to know each other, and I’m sure we’ll become firm friends.’
‘Okay,’ I said, sounding ridiculously grateful.
He winked at me. Picking up the bottle of champagne, Vince pushed at the cork with his thumb until it flew out. He poured the bubbly, golden liquid into the four glasses and passed one each to me and Hazel. He then passed one to the blonde woman, holding the glass in mid-air for a few seconds when he spotted her scowling at me. ‘This is Alice,’ he said, finally passing over the drink.
I assumed she must be his girlfriend and my mood plummeted. If she wasn’t a model, she certainly could pass for one. How could I ever compete with someone so glamorous? There was something about her that I ached to duplicate. I resented her immediately.
‘So, you’re an actress,’ Vince said, ignoring her and focusing on me.
‘Yes.’
‘Have you done much acting work?’ I shook my head. ‘Never mind. If you’re determined and have any talent then you might stand a chance.’ He narrowed his eyes and drank some of his champagne. ‘I might be able to help you, at least wi
th an introduction or two, but you’re going to have to work for it.’
I didn’t care what I had to do. ‘That would be perfect,’ I said, taking a sip but the champagne went down my throat the wrong way. I began coughing, mortified to have made such a fool of myself. Unable to catch my breath I held out my glass, trying to place it on the bar. My eyes streamed. It was all I could do not to cry. My first impression and it had been a bad one.
‘Here,’ Vince said quietly, taking my glass with one hand and patting my back with the other. ‘Joe, get the kid a glass of water. Now!’
I fought to draw breath and Vince’s hard pats on my back helped a bit.
‘Here,’ he said, his voice gentle. ‘Take a few sips of this water, it should help.’
I did as he said, taking first one sip and then another few. Gradually the coughing ceased, and my breathing began to return to normal.
He handed me back my glass. ‘Come with me,’ he said as if we were the only ones there. ‘There’s someone I’d like you to meet.’
I did as he asked, nervously hoping that this would be my life-changing moment. Vince put an arm around my waist again and lowered his head slightly towards me. ‘The guy I’m taking you to meet is a business contact of mine.’
My mouth dried up instantly. I could barely contain my nerves. ‘Really?’
He gave me a little squeeze. ‘Yes, really.’
Hazel had been right; Vince was lovely. We drew up next to a short, skinny man with thick glasses.
‘Vinnie,’ he shouted, raising his arms in the air. ‘Where’ve you been hiding all night?’ The men standing with him moved away. I noticed one nudge the other and grin in my direction. I shivered for some reason I didn’t understand.
Vince placed his palm against the small of my back and propelled me forward. ‘Gerald, this is Mimi.’
I almost lost my footing. When I regained my composure, I came face to face with the second person that evening who took more time to study me than I was used to. His tongue moistened his fat lower lip thoughtfully. ‘Mimi,’ he said in a high-pitched nasal voice. ‘You are a cute one.’
