As I turned the corner, I remembered the dream with my mom warning me to be careful of achieving what I desire. Maybe she hadn't been talking about me, but trying to lead me in the direction I needed to look.
If Rachel and Melissa were friends, what could possibly make her treat Melissa so shoddily when she was out of commission? It wasn’t because of her singing, at least I didn't think so. Rachel had never shown any interest in either music or drama, so Melissa being too sick to sing her role wouldn’t impact her in the slightest. And it wouldn’t be competition over a university spot if Rachel was going to Toronto for prelaw and Melissa was entering nursing. I didn’t think it involved a boy, but I didn’t know much about that side of things.
What if I was looking at it the wrong way?
Maybe it wasn’t about direct competition. But what else could it be? I hadn't managed to come to any clear conclusions by the time I got home, and it was already after eleven. Morning would come far too early, so I gave my dad a hug and kiss, admonished him to stop reading, and headed to bed. Maybe the answers would come to me if I stopped looking for them.
Or maybe I’d find them in my dreams.
The sound of waves crashing filled my ears as the spray cooled my skin. The sun was hot against my cheeks, invigorating while making me feel carefree. I knew there was something I was supposed to be doing, but it didn't matter at the moment.
All that mattered was the sun and the sea and the person standing in front of me, skipping stones.
He had dark hair, the color of a beautiful chestnut pony I’d seen at a petting zoo when I was little. I’d begged my mom and dad to let me take the pony home to no avail. I shook my head at the silly thought. That was over ten years ago now. I hadn’t thought of the thing in years.
The red glints in his hair drew my eyes back, and I allowed them to trail down from there along his wide shoulders and narrow waist. Something about him pulled me closer, and I realized I was standing beside him only when our feet were almost level.
“Did you find what you needed to know?”
I couldn’t see his face as he looked out over the water, just his profile. He had a firm nose, not too curved or sharp, which perfectly suited the strong jaw beneath it and the smooth bridge above it.
“Find what? Was I supposed to be looking for something?”
A smile curved his lips. The sudden notion of tracing them planted itself in my head. Blinking, I stepped back.
“Well, it depends. I’m thinking I’m supposed to find you, but not yet. I may be off-base, but in the meantime, I think we’re supposed to be finding ourselves. We need to discover where and what our line in the sand will be.”
I looked down at the sand, confused. His words were calm and simple, but at the same time, they made no sense. What kind of dream was this anyway? Why was I supposed to draw a line in the sand?
What was I doing by the ocean again? I stood beside him in silence, unable to come up with anything that fit the circumstances, considering I didn't know him from Adam.
A splash distracted me, pulling my attention toward the water. A glint of iridescent green flashed in the blue, with a streak of red hair following.
“Hello?”
I was certain it was the mermaid from my music box and the other dreams, but she didn’t answer or come close enough for me to talk to.
A warm hand reached out and laced fingers through mine. My heart leapt as I looked down to see his larger, tan hand holding mine.
“Who are you?” I could barely breathe the words. “Do I know you?”
He turned slightly, his smile revealing straight, white teeth.
“No, but you will. Once you know yourself.”
Chapter 10
I slammed my locker shut, my eyes still extra-gritty even after the strong coffee I'd made in an attempt to face the morning. It was going to be a long day, even longer with the concert tonight, but I hoped I’d get a second wind before then. Something about performing always gave a burst of energy; likely adrenaline from fear of complete and utter self-embarrassment. But whatever it was, I’d take it.
The caffeine was definitely not working today.
Clutching my science text closer to my chest, I gave the lock one last jiggle to make sure it was closed and turned to see Rachel standing a few lockers over. She hadn’t noticed me yet so I took my time examining her.
She looked almost as perfect as Melissa, although it was easy to see she had to work a lot harder to look that way. Melissa always had a girl next-door vibe about her, where Rachel dressed in the latest trendy clothing and wore her makeup with full smoky eye every day, the kind where the eyeliner swooped into a Cleopatra thing.
I’d attempted it a few times and decided it wasn't for me. It didn’t suit me, not to mention it was far too much effort. I could only ever manage to get one perfect, and the other somehow appeared to have been drawn with my foot.
I snapped back from my rambling thoughts when Rachel slammed her locker shut. I looked up as she fumbled and dropped several books. Papers flew everywhere. I hurried over to help, bending to pick up the items.
“Thanks, but I’ve got this.” Her voice was terse.
I flinched at the coldness coming off her, handing over the one book I’d picked up. “Okay, um, sure. Did you need anything else?”
She shook her head, scrambling to pick up the loose papers. I noticed I’d stepped on one and lifted my foot just as she lunged for it. I only caught a glimpse but one of the sentences stood out. Was that a question from the quiz we’d taken on Friday? Oh. Snap! Were those the answers too?
I had been about to ask her about Melissa, but at that observation, I faltered. Where had she gotten this? Biting my lip, I tried to decide whether to ask her what it was or leave it. The way she’d been so abrupt told me she was unlikely to answer any of my questions.
Not to mention I didn't want to be seen anywhere near it if that paper was what I thought it was. So I did nothing, waiting as Rachel collected her items without a word and let her go without asking any of the questions I wanted to.
Something occurred to me as I watched her bolt down the hall.
If both Melissa and Rachel were in the running for valedictorian, how important was it for Rachel to win? Was it worth cursing her best friend? Or was Rachel acting differently because she was up to something more mundane but just as unsavory, like getting the answers for tests in advance?
I wasn’t sure if it was another crazy idea brought on by the music box, dreams about my mom, or even the one I’d had last night with the handsome stranger. Maybe I’d read one too many magic books. But whatever it was, I decided to keep an eye on her until I had more information.
I entered homeroom just as the first bell rang and instead of sitting beside her in class, I chose a desk better suited for watching her. It could have been my imagination, but she seemed more jittery than normal. Fidgeting with her hair, biting her lips, and looking around instead of straight ahead like usual.
She spent too much time whispering with another girl, one I knew in passing from French class last semester. Marty? Maria? She was new to our school and the grapevine said she’d transferred mid-year because she’d been kicked out of her last school. She seemed like an odd companion for the otherwise preppy-perfect Rachel.
Then again, if Rachel had done something to make Melissa sick or was cheating on tests, maybe there was more going on here than was obvious to the eye.
The bell rang and I reluctantly filed out with the others. This was the only class I shared with Rachel and my one chance to observe her. It still seemed like a stretch that she’d done anything to Melissa, but I wondered how much being valedictorian meant to her. Rachel was one of the top students, neck and neck with Melissa, so maybe it was enough. Maybe it was the reason she’d ghosted her sick best friend.
I shook my head. I couldn't understand wanting to be valedictorian. My marks were decent, not top tier but okay. Even if I had been in the running though, I would have ref
used. Public speaking without lines and songs to break up the monotony did not appeal to me in the slightest.
Not to mention cheating to get the top mark? Not the kind of recognition I was interested in. Even if you didn't get caught, you’d always know you hadn't earned it. Maybe it was because my dad was a university professor and cheating had always been one of his hot buttons, but I couldn’t imagine not being proud of hard work and winning because of my own efforts. Cheating to avoid failing out of desperation, sure.
Then again, maybe we had different priorities.
Either way, Rachel hadn’t achieved her goal. If it even was her goal. Melissa would be writing exams on time and could still end up valedictorian. I wondered if she was home yet and sent her a quick text. When I didn't hear back by the time the bell rang, I put my phone away, wondering if everything was okay. I hoped she’d been given the all-clear to go home.
I didn't have a chance to check until lunch and my curiosity had been an irritating itch under my skin for the last period. When I pulled it out and immediately saw a reply, I smiled. Tucking it back into my pocket, I headed to the table where the drama club hung out.
Conversation revolved almost entirely around tonight’s production and everyone was excited and chatty. That gave me plenty of time to listen and think without having to add to the conversation and also allowed me to watch Rachel.
She sat at her usual table with all of her other friends and all seemed fine until a loud argument erupted between her and another girl. Everyone stopped to watch as Rachel began to scream something.
The other girl was speaking in a low voice, clearly trying to calm her down. I couldn’t make out her words, but my eyes widened at the anger and hatred twisting Rachel’s face. I’d never seen her look so dangerous.
The other girl, a tiny brunette with glasses, kept up her attempt but I only caught a few words before Rachel slammed her tray down, causing food to spray across the table and land on the other girl.
Turning on her heel, she stalked away, leaving the cafeteria eerily silent for a moment before the loud buzz of conversation, likely about the scene we’d all witnessed, filled the void.
My friend, Matt, leaned over. "Oh dear. It looks like someone didn't like their lunch very much."
He sounded so comical he surprised a laugh out of me before I smacked him on the arm.
“Since when did you start narrating the drama news?”
The rest of the people at the table laughed and returned to discussing the play as interest waned in speculating what the fight had been about. I couldn’t switch my attention as easily though.
Now more than ever, I wondered what was going on. I knew the other girl only in passing but I couldn't remember her being anything other than sweet. What could she possibly have said to make the usually even-tempered Rachel storm off like that?
"Hey guys, I'm gonna go. I just remembered I need to speak to my math teacher before class. I'll catch you tonight. We’re meeting at five o'clock, right?"
The play didn't start until seven, but we needed to be there early. At the quick confirmation, I waved and left the cafeteria, hoping to catch up with Rachel.
Feeling a little like a stalker, I rounded the corner to see her crying on one of the large benches next to the window and ducked back before she saw me. What was I doing? It's not like I could say anything about what she’d dropped. I'd let her pick the paper off the floor without commenting, partly in self-preservation so I wouldn’t be accused of cheating. Now I was even more certain it had been a good move after the blow-up with one of her besties.
The problem was we also weren’t close enough for me to ask how she was doing after a scene like that without taking a chance of having her tear a strip off me as well.
So instead, I kept walking to the bathroom, feeling like a coward. Telling myself discretion was the better part of valor, I settled for texting Melissa.
Maybe she’d have an idea.
Almost as soon as I finished typing, I got a reply.
She had a fight with Beth? No one ever fights with Beth.
That's what I thought. Should I ask about it? I followed, but chickened out. She's crying in the hallway and I'm hiding a bathroom stall.
Lmao. No, if it was as bad as you said, she's not going to be open to talking to anyone. Let me ask Beth. I'll get back to you.
Okay. I gotta get to class. See you tonight?
Yes! I'll try to come a little early to see everyone.
Okay. Can't wait! Come right backstage- you’re totally still part of the crew.
She sent back a bunch of hearts and fireworks, and I dashed off a quick emoji happy face before putting my phone away.
Rather anticlimactically, nothing happened for the remainder of the day. I didn’t have any other classes with Rachel, and nothing exciting happened anywhere else.
I lingered in front of the lockers for a few minutes after classes finished, but when Rachel didn’t show, I reluctantly left at the prodding of my stomach. I needed to eat something before the show tonight, even if I was uneasy about the change in her pattern. Normally, she was one of the first to leave.
Had something happened to Rachel?
Chapter 11
The butterflies living in my stomach seemed to want to escape and I swallowed hard. With minutes until the final announcement, I tried to work on my breathing and somehow relax.
No matter how many times I sang on stage, it always felt new. It was unlike anything else in my life. The joy I got from singing alone was immense, it was knowing everyone was there, watching me, that was the problem. Whether I did a good or bad job, I would still have an audience.
No amount of reassurance from my dad, and now Melissa, made any difference in my performance anxiety. The rest of the crew had been really supportive of me stepping into Melissa’s place, but I began to panic now that the moment of truth was here. Telling myself it was a wonderful opportunity to practice was not working this time.
It wasn't until I heard a familiar voice behind me was it possible for me to push my anxiety aside.
"Mrs. Henderson said I would find you here. Ready to shine?"
"Melissa! I didn't think you were going to make it!"
Standing off to the side to avoid the prop guys, she blew me a kiss and winked. “Here I am!"
A smile spread on my face and I couldn't resist teasing her. "So does that mean you want your role back?"
Her eyebrows shot up underneath her bangs and she snorted, holding a hand up. "Absolutely not! I haven't had a coughing fit in almost a day, but I'm pretty sure singing would be a great way to trigger one. I'm only here to support you and everyone else. I can't wait to see you guys from the audience. That’s the worst part about being in the show— it’s nearly impossible to watch the whole thing!"
As we smiled at each other, I was in awe how much my feelings about her had changed in under a month. She’d gone from being someone I envied to someone I would consider a best friend. But even as happiness at gaining a friend filled me, thoughts of Rachel intruded and my smile faded.
Frowning at the change, Melissa stepped closer. "Is everything okay? Remember, it’s just nerves. You've sang harder pieces and they have someone with lines if you forget."
I shook my head. "No, that's not it. I just thought of your friend, Rachel." I looked around to make sure no one was paying attention, then leaned closer and dropped my voice to a whisper. "Remember when I said I felt guilty and thought my jealousy had made you sick?"
Melissa's frown deepened. "Which we agreed was crazy, yes. What does that have to do with her?"
"Probably nothing, but I’m wondering if she’s been avoiding you out of envy. This morning she dropped a piece of paper outside her locker. I caught enough of a glimpse for me to want to head the other way immediately.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Why? What did it say?”
I bit my lip. “I think it had the answers to a test I took with her last week. Do you think she’s jealous of your m
arks? She's in the running for valedictorian, isn't she?"
Melissa shrugged. "Yeah, I think so. Come to think of it, she has always been pretty competitive about marks. I never minded though. I always saw it as a way to push myself to do better. But that stuff isn’t real—there’s no logical way she could have cursed me. I mean, I spent the summer in a place where tuberculosis isn’t rare."
I exhaled, shaking my head as I tried to think of an alternative. "I know. But even if she didn’t curse you, it could be why she hasn’t called. With exams coming up, I’m sure she’s studying a lot. Maybe without you studying with her, it’s a case of out of sight, out of mind?"
Melissa paused to consider the idea before ruling it out. "I just can't see Rachel being jealous. I mean, we've always been pretty even. If this was an issue for her, she would have said something before now."
"I know, I'm likely just being paranoid. With all the reading I’ve done about magic and curses, and the stress of taking your part in the play, I’m probably jumping at shadows. I’m sure that’s all."
"Well, stop being so silly. It’s time for you to go break a leg. I had a great nap this afternoon, so I should have enough energy to come to something low-key after. I’m definitely not up for the house party, but I’d love to catch up with people somewhere more quiet after the show."
I nodded just as the lights flashed and the five-minute warning rang out. "Yikes! There’s my cue.”
“Good luck!" After a quick hug, Melissa disappeared into the audience.
I’d never seen or heard of Brigadoon before Mrs. Henderson told us we were going to be putting it on, but it had quickly become one of my all-time favorite musicals. The idea behind it had seemed so far-fetched, at least, it had until I’d started reading that magic book.
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