I closed my eyes, the tears already forming.
The sounds of him unzipping his pants were like cannons in my ears. He rationalized what he did by convincing himself it wasn’t wrong as long as he didn’t have sex with me. A little fondling and fingering on his part was nothing. It was just foreplay in his eyes, just some heavy petting.
It wasn’t rape if it wasn’t intercourse.
That’s what he believed.
I felt his hand on the back of my head as he came around to stand in front of me. His pants unzipped, he didn’t even need to push his pants and underwear down. He wore loose boxers that had a slit where he could pull his dick out through.
“Come on, little girl,” he rasped out, his desperation showing. “Open up that pretty mouth of yours.” He rubbed the head against my lips, and all I could think about was Carly, Many, and Tammy getting arrested for that stupid prank. Never mind me, it was my friends who I was worried about. They were the ones I was doing this for.
Ignoring the tears, I opened my mouth and let him do what he’s been doing for the past few weeks. He violated my person, using my guilt against me. And I didn’t know how to stop it now. Now, it was my word against his, and who would believe me? He was a cop, for Pete’s sake.
“Yeah, that’s so good,” he praised, his hands tightening in my hair. I didn’t say anything. I just did what needed to be done, and when he was done, I had every intention of putting this out of my mind like every other time before this. But then, his parting words stopped me cold.
“I’m getting inside that tight pussy before you graduate, little girl.”
Chapter 8
Lorcan~
Where Vanessa and I had spent all day fucking on Monday, Tuesday had been a different story. She’d been moody and edgy, and actually just an all-around bitch.
And I was fucking tired of it.
Knowing her parents had a standing bridge game every Wednesday night, I had demanded she let me come over, so we could talk. And she must have known I was serious because she had reluctantly agreed and had even commented that maybe it was time.
When I had arrived, Vanessa had immediately gone to what she knew best. She’d gotten on her knees as soon as I had gotten here, and now she was showering after another bout of frantic sex. And since this was the first time she’s rushed to the shower after sex, I knew she was stalling.
Sitting on her bed, running my hands through my hair in frustration, I knew I couldn’t leave here without answers. I was tired of her roller coaster of emotions, and no matter how much I cared for her, this shit was becoming exhausting.
Glancing around the room, while she showered, I noticed her nightstand drawer cracked open. I wasn’t a neat freak or anything like that, but opened cabinets or drawers annoyed the shit out of me. It was like another level of laziness I just couldn’t get behind. It didn’t take a whole lot of manpower to push a drawer all the way in or closed a cabinet after you’ve gotten what you needed.
Leaning over, I went to push the drawer closed when something caught my eye. I grabbed the handle and pulled the drawer open wider, and I literally lost my breath.
What in the actual fuck?
I reached in, and though I’ve never seen one in real life before, I knew what it was. I knew enough about it to know what I was looking at.
It was a fucking pregnancy test.
Grabbing my phone from my pocket, I pulled up pregnancy tests and searched what two fucking lines meant. Pacing the room, I searched for a similar-looking test online, and once I found one, I found out the difference between one line and two. Two lines meant positive, like the two lines staring back at me right now.
Vanessa was fucking pregnant.
As my brain absorbed that bit of information, everything else started to click in place. The distance, the mood swings, the hot and cold, the sexual highs and low, all of it…it made sense now.
I tucked my phone back in my pocket, and dropping my ass back on her bed, I wondered what the hell I was going to do now. More importantly, why hadn’t Vanessa said anything? Was she scared? Did she really think I wouldn’t be there for her? Did she really think I wouldn’t support her?
And even with the whirlwind of confusion I was feeling right now, I couldn’t lie and say I understood what she might be going through. As a male, I’d never understand what Vanessa might be thinking or feeling right now.
Getting pregnant meant two different things to men and women. For men, it meant we were going to become fathers, and in nine months, we had to make sure we were financially ready for that responsibility. We had nine months to get our shit together and provide for the family we had created. We had nine months to grow the fuck up and do better. We had nine months to come up with a plan that worked for everyone.
Women not so much.
They didn’t have time for all that. They didn’t have nine months to get their shit together. They had to get their shit together immediately. Their entire lives changed immediately. The second that test came up positive, they had to start watching what they ate, making sure they stayed healthy.
Women went through immediate changes with their mindset, their bodies, their emotions, their everything. There wasn’t one part of a woman’s makeup that went untouched by pregnancy. Grown women struggled with the abrupt changes, so I couldn’t imagine what a positive pregnancy test did to a teenage girl. A teenage girl who had plans to go to college in a few months.
I didn’t agree with Vanessa not telling me, but I could reluctantly understand it.
When the shower turned off, I remained sitting on the bed, trying to decide if I was pissed, confused, or sympathetic. I turned my head at the sound of the bathroom door opening, and as soon as Vanessa exited the bathroom wrapped in a warm, fuzzy robe, pissed was the feeling that trumped all the others.
I stood up and tossed the life-changing stick on the bed. “What the fuck is that?” She glanced at the bed and her panicked eyes told me everything I needed to know. “Are you fucking kidding me, Vanessa? How could you not tell me?”
I still couldn’t understand how this happened. We used protection every fucking time we’ve gotten naked together. There has never been one slip up, and even if Vanessa had chosen to go on birth control, I still would have used condoms. I’ve never fucked without one, so I didn’t know what I was missing, and I wasn’t keen on finding out.
And I knew condoms still had a fail rate, but Jesus fucking Christ, Vanessa took it up the ass more than anything. I’ve unloaded in her pussy lots of times, but over the last few months or so, it’s always in her ass or on her face or tits. If she were going to get pregnant, you would have thought it would have been early in our relationship when it’d been all about the pussy.
What were the fucking odds?
“Lorcan, I…”
“What, Vanessa?” I snapped. “You, what?”
And then she fucking slayed me.
“I…I’m scared,” she whispered brokenly, her eyes like shimmering emeralds as tears formed. “I…I was-am scared.”
I was around the bed, pulling her into my arms, before I knew it. “Vanessa…”
Her body started wracking with sobs. “I…I just do…don’t know wh…what t…to do,” she confessed.
My body locked up.
I knew this was a ‘woman’s right to choose’ world. I knew keeping the baby would put her through a lot more than it would me. I knew this decision affected the woman on a level beyond basic responsibility.
I knew this.
But this was my baby, and I’d never not want it, even if the timing was less than ideal.
“It’ll be okay, Vanessa,” I lied because if she chose abortion, nothing would be okay ever again. At least, not between us.
“I’m…I’m so…sorry I didn’t…didn’t tell you, Lorcan,” she cried.
“Let’s not worry about that right now, okay?” She just nodded into my chest, crying. “Just know that I’m here, Vanessa. I’m here, and I’m not going an
ywhere,” I vowed.
Chapter 9
Rowan~
He answered on the second ring. “Row?” The concern in his voice was unmistakable, but then, I didn’t call Grayson in the middle of the day like this.
“G…Gra…” I couldn’t get the words out. I didn’t want to get the word out, but what choice did I have anymore?
“Rowan, what’s wrong?” Grayson snapped, concern morphing into panic.
“I…co…come home,” I begged. “Can…can you come home?”
“Mom and D-”
“No,” I rushed out. “They’re fine. I just…”
“Jesus fucking Christ, Rowan,” he barked. “What the fuck is wrong?”
“I…I’m in trouble,” I confessed, my voice carrying the weight of the world. “I’m in so much trouble, Grayson.”
His end went silence for a bit. Finally, he asked, “Are…are you pregnant, Rowan?”
“Worse,” I confessed.
“I’m heading to the airport now, Row,” he said. “I’ll be there as soon as I can, okay?”
I nodded, though he couldn’t see me. “Okay.”
“Rowan?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you,” he said fiercely. “Whatever this is, I got you, Row.”
I broke down crying, and I had no idea when he finally hung up to come home and save me. I had no idea how long I cried or how long I was asleep. I just knew that my entire body ached as I came awake, a hand gently prodding my arm. Cracking my eyes open, my brother’s face came into focus, and the tears started all over again.
He quickly gathered me in his arms, and just held me as I cried again. “Row, sweetie…” he murmured against my hair.
It had taken a while, but when I finally calmed down, I asked, “Where are Mom and Dad? What time is it?”
“It’s past nine,” he said. “It took forever for me to get a flight and-”
“It’s okay,” I said. “Did they…see you?”
“They’re already in bed, Row.”
We stayed the way we were for a while, Grayson giving me the time I needed to get my shit together, and when I finally did, I pulled out of his arms, and looked up at him. He looked wrecked, and it broke my heart.
“A few weeks ago, Carly, Tammy, Mandy, and me participated in senior prank week.” His blue eyes held my gaze, searching for hints of what was to come. “We…we broke into the Administration offices at Sequoia and stole freshman transcripts.” I took a deep breath and tried to calm my racing heartbeat. “As we were making our escape, I got hung up on the fence. I…I told the girls to save themselves, but I got caught by the school’s utility officer.”
“Row, if it was just a prank-”
I shook my head. “But it wasn’t just a prank,” I told him. “We hadn’t taken into consideration all the confidential information contained in our student files, and that’s not a prank, Grayson. With some of those files containing medical records, what we did was illegal. It wasn’t just a prank.”
“Okay,” he said carefully. “Dad’s a lawyer, so he can-”
Shaking my head again, my voice broke when I said, “I made a huge mistake, Grayson. With the threat to my future and Carly’s, Mandy’s, and Tammy’s, I made a huge mistake. But there were cameras and…”
Fear flared in his eyes. “What did you do, Rowan?”
“The…” Tears started pouring again, and I couldn’t stop the revulsion I felt at having to tell my brother something so personal and dirty.
Grayson’s hand reached out and squeezed my leg. “Rowan, whatever it is, you’re still my sister. Nothing else matters, okay?”
I nodded. “The…the officer he…he agreed to…he agreed to let me go, and…and not go after the girls if…if I…”
Color drained from his face as soon as he made sense of the words that I’d left unsaid. But that paleness quickly gave way to a rush of anger coating his face. “He made you have sex with him?”
Shaking my head, I told him everything.
I told him every detail about the night of the prank, and every single time Officer Connors had sought me out since then. The words came out like a fountain of disgust at myself and Officer Connors. And even though he was my brother, I didn’t sugarcoat the things I’d done. I didn’t gloss over the things Officer Connors had made me do. When I was done, I told him the reason for finally coming clean and calling him.
“I…I can’t do it, Grayson,” I blurted. “It’s bad enough that I…I can’t give him my virginity, too.”
Like crunching gravel, Grayson’s voice was dark and sharp. “I’m going to fucking kill him,” he snarled. “I’m going to fucking kill him, Rowan.”
I grabbed onto his arms. “No!” I cried out. “That’s why I didn’t tell you. I…I can’t…I’m not going to let you get in trouble, Gra-”
“Fuck that, Rowan,” he snapped. “You’re my sister. You’re my sister, and some sick pervert has been abusing you. I’m going to fucking kill him with my bare hands.”
My tears started bordering on hysteria. “No!” I cried again. “Please, Grayson. Please, listen to me. Please.”
Grayson jumped up off the bed and started pacing my room. “What the fuck do you expect me to do, Rowan?” He stopped and speared me with a look. “How can you honestly expect me not to kill the motherfucker?”
I was desperate. I couldn’t let my brother go to prison for life because I didn’t doubt his words. He wasn’t venting or in a fog of anger. If given the chance, Grayson will kill Officer Connors, and I knew it.
“Wha…what if…I…” I stood up, walked towards him, and took his hands in mine. “I’ll tell Mom and Dad, okay?” His eyes locked onto mine, and it was identical blue staring back at me. “I swear. We…we can tell them in the morning.”
Grayson shook his head. “We tell them now, Rowan,” he insisted. “If you don’t want me to leave right now to go hunt that motherfucker down, we tell Mom and Dad now.”
I nodded frantically. “Okay,” I agreed. Anything to keep my brother from ruining his life. “Okay.”
Grayson’s arm snaked out, and he hauled me into his arms. “Jesus fucking Christ, Row,” he swore. “Jesus fucking Christ.”
Chapter 10
Lorcan~
Vanessa and I had spent the rest of Wednesday evening talking about the last few weeks, and she had even apologized for her behavior.
We hadn’t talked about college or what this meant for our future. We hadn’t even discussed our options. We hadn’t discussed anything significant other than why she’s been all over the place these past few weeks. It was as if Vanessa had finally been able to release her confused feelings, and I held her as she purged her imprisoned feelings.
After leaving her asleep in her bed Wednesday, I had gone home and told Molly. She had listened intently, and though you could see the disappointment in her eyes, she hadn’t turned her opinion into the focal point of the conversation. Molly had just listened.
And now, it was Friday, and I had only a couple of more classes to get through before going home and telling my parents that I was going to be a father.
I was about to head to my calculus class when I rounded the south end of the history building and I saw Mr. Hostettler with his hand wrapped around Vanessa’s arm, pulling her around the back of the concession building.
Anger flared bright.
Never mind that he hated me and rode me unjustly during class. Never mind that a teacher never should be putting their hands on a student. Never mind that Mr. Hostettler was an asshole, plain and simple. Fuck all that. Vanessa was pregnant, and I wouldn’t let someone put their hands on her even if she weren’t.
Class forgotten, I ran down the string of lockers, and around the back of the interlocking hallways, until I was coming up on the east side of the concession building. That’s when I saw him pulling her into one of the utility rooms.
And she wasn’t fighting him.
Acid burned in the pit of my stomach, and my mind was desp
erately trying to deny the red flags of obviousness. Pushing back the rage that threatened to burst through, I made my way to the door, and testing the knob, it was unlocked.
As carefully and as quietly as I could, I opened the door and walked in. The sight that greeted me was of Vanessa and Mr. Hostettler in a heated standoff, and unfortunately for me, I could hear every word.
“I’m tired of waiting,” Vanessa screeched. “And now, because you haven’t left your wife, Lorcan thinks the baby is his.”
Her words were like a kick to the chest.
This fucking bitch.
“It’s not that easy,” Mr. Hostettler snapped at her. “You have no idea how difficult it is to get divorced.”
“Then maybe you should have thought about that before you started fucking one of your students,” Vanessa replied scathingly.
“Vanessa, that’s enough,” he hissed. “You act like I knew you weren’t on birth control.”
“I didn’t need to be,” she hissed back. “Lorcan is a condom fanatic. He never goes without wearing one, no matter what.”
“Good thing, too,” I said, hearing enough.
Vanessa jumped and gasped as they both whirled around at the sound of my voice. She looked aghast and he looked panicked.
“L…Lor…can,” she sputtered. “It’s…you don’t…”
Cold rage froze my blood. “Don’t,” I spat. “Just don’t.”
“Mr. Cavanaugh, you-”
Cold rage turned into a boil, and whatever he was about to was cut off as I took off straight for him. My fist slamming against his jaw, he toppled back, and I went with him.
“Lorcan!” Vanessa screamed, but fuck her.
My fists began raining down on Mr. Hostettler’s face, but once he regained his senses, the man finally started fighting back, and then it was on.
Vanessa’s screams in the background did nothing to cool the fire in my blood or my taste for revenge. This asshole knew Vanessa was my girlfriend, and all his bullshit these past few weeks finally made sense. He’d been riding my ass in class because he’d been fucking Vanessa’s.
Our Cracked Pieces (The Pieces Series Book 2) Page 4
