Her heart wouldn't stop racing in her chest as she grabbed her purse and started out the door. She was going to have to tell him the truth now. The truth about deceiving him. The truth about who she was and what she had done. If he couldn't forgive her, she would understand, because she didn't know if she could forgive herself.
In the parking garage under her building, she sat in her car for a long time with her hands clutching the steering wheel. She didn't know if she was ready to do this. Even with the makeup and hair and clothes, she was the same girl she had been earlier that day. The same insecure unsure kid who grew up in the worst situations, with the worst kinds of people. It wasn't the kind of thing that just went away because you changed clothes.
Finally, she got up the nerve to start her car, and made her way to the park. The entire time she was driving, she felt faint from her heart beating in her ears. By the time she made it to the park and stopped her car, she had already told herself multiple times she was just going to go home and forget all about this crazy shifter mate silliness.
She'd only been with one other man in her life and it had been a disaster. This would probably end the same way.
But then she looked up and saw David sitting on a park bench by the pond. The sunset was glowing in his hair and he looked so handsome it made her heart ache.
Lilia had told her a million times that he would accept her just as she was, and she knew Lilia wasn't a liar. Lilia knew more about men than Darcy ever would. Maybe she was right. Maybe all of this drama had been for no reason. Darcy had worked it all up in her head and maybe believed something that just wasn't true. She had to give David a chance. In their brief moments of conversation, she’d felt more alive and more accepted than she ever had in her life.
She didn't want to make the mistake of underestimating him again. He deserved so much more than that. After steeling her nerves, she climbed out of the car as the golden light of sunset stretched over the park. She approached the bench where he sat as the swans swam by on the inky water. She cleared her throat, and he looked up at her. Their eyes met for the first time.
“Hi, David. I’m Darcy. Your mate.”
Chapter 11
Rider blinked several times, looking up at the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen in his life. The smell of his mate surrounded him, and he felt his inner bear rear up at the back of his mind.
“Mate! Mate! Mate!” his inner bear screamed, growling and swiping his claws against the backs of Rider’s eyes.
Darcy gave off the most alluring aroma he had ever smelled, and it was clear to him that the woman before him was in fact his true mate. And she was not the woman he'd met for lunch.
“What's going on?” he asked, standing. He reached out and took her hands without thinking. The touch of her skin in his palms sent an electric thrill up his arms and down his spine. He shivered with excitement and began to breathe heavily. “I don't understand.”
“We should sit down. I'll explain everything.”
They sat on the bench as the brilliant rays of sunset sparkled in her fiery red hair. The swans drifted by on the glassy water, casting heart-shaped reflections as they embraced each other.
“I should explain from the beginning.”
“Who did I meet at the restaurant?”
“That was my friend Lilia. She wanted to do me a favor, so she pretended to be me.”
“Why?” He was so confused.
“Because I was afraid to meet you myself.”
“Afraid to meet me?”
Rider was at a loss for words. He didn't know what to think or say or do. He didn't realize that they were still holding hands until he looked down.
“My parents died when I was very young, and I spent my childhood in foster care.”
“I'm so sorry,” he said.
“The experience in foster care was not a good one. I was transferred from home to home and never really had a place that felt like home. I know that there are some great foster parents out there, but I never had them. When I was in my early teens, I had a foster mother who was a terrible alcoholic. She neglected me and the other children, and I had to learn how to take care of myself and everyone else. That's when I started to learn to cook. It saved my life.
“But that same woman used to tell me almost every day how ugly I am. Her words stuck with me and it became how I saw myself. Inside, I became the ugly duckling who no one could love. In many ways, it helped me become who I am. I focused on my studies and got into culinary school. I graduated at the top of my class and got work in a great restaurant.
“Even after all these years, and all I’ve accomplished, those cruel words stuck with me. I never really learned how to do my hair and makeup, how to dress, how to present myself in a way that would be attractive to men, so I never dated.
“I didn't care until now. I'm approaching my thirties, and I'm beginning to think about a family and children. I realized I would never have them because no man would ever want me. Then one day, on a whim, I joined Mate.com, and I met you.
“You were so wonderful and funny and kind and so incredibly handsome. The cruel words of that woman came back to me, and I was just a scared, lonely kid again. I didn't think you would ever want me the way that I am. So I uploaded Lilia’s picture and asked her to meet you for me.
“I should have told you the truth. But by the time you’d met her, I couldn't do it. I couldn't tell you that I'd lied and that the beautiful, feminine, desirable woman you met wasn’t really me.”
Rider listened to all this with shock and confusion. The woman in front of him was so amazingly beautiful — more beautiful than any woman he had ever seen — and yet she believed he would not find her attractive. He couldn't speak to reply. His words were caught in the lump in his throat.
“You must think I'm a terrible person for what I've done.”
At that, Rider found his voice. “How could you believe that you are not the most beautiful woman in the world? Whatever that woman told you when you were a young girl was insane. She clearly had something extremely wrong with her. I have never met a more beautiful woman in my life than the one I see sitting here before me, telling me she doesn't believe she's beautiful. Telling me she feared to reveal her true face to me because she believed I would reject her. If I gave the impression that I was a man, a shifter, who would reject his mate for any reason, I am profoundly sorry.”
“This isn't your fault, David. I take full responsibility.”
“You should have told me. You should have posted a picture of yourself. I would have wanted you even if you weren't as beautiful as you are. My God, you are beautiful. Maybe human men can't see past the lipstick, rouge, and salon haircuts. But I can see and sense exactly who you are. I can see the natural beauty in your face, your body, your eyes.”
At the mention of her eyes, Darcy began to squint and rub her eyelids.
“Speaking of eyes, I really need to take these contacts out before I go blind. I'm going to go to my car to remove them.”
“Promise me you’ll come right back.”
“I will. I'm not going to lie to you again.”
He could see the tears forming in her eyes and he believed her. It must have hurt her so much to do what she'd done. He couldn't imagine how badly she must've felt about herself to go through this whole act of pretending to be someone else. He could tell how much it hurt her. He could sense her pain, and see it bubbling up in her eyes. She needed forgiveness. She needed to know he didn't blame her for what she’d done.
Someone had hurt her, and it had formed who she was and what she believed about herself. He vowed to spend the rest of his life helping her to see exactly how beautiful she was.
When she walked back from the car and sat beside him, a pair of thick glasses were propped on her nose. They made her eyes bigger and accentuated the pretty, round shape of her face. They gave her a studious quality that genuinely suited her, and he instantly realized that this was her truth.
He wanted to see h
er washed clean, in her bare and natural state. Stripped of all the frills, paint, sprays, and powders. He wanted to see the very essence of her being. But he knew that it was too soon. The clothes and the lipstick were like armor for her. She still believed that her perfect, natural beauty was not enough. It made him angry and terribly sad. All he wanted was to hold her in his arms. He settled for reaching out and taking her hand.
“I said it before, and I'll say it again and again. A million times if I have to. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met. It is a great honor that you are my mate. I intend to spend the rest of my life reminding you of exactly how beautiful you are each and every day. If you’ll let me.” He said these words gazing deeply into her emerald green eyes, enunciating each syllable so that she knew he meant what he said.
She sucked back a sob and turned away, biting her lip. “I don't know if I can. I don't know if I ever will see myself the way you do. You have no idea how much money I spent to look like this today. How much help it took. I don't know if I can even remember how to do it all. When you see the real me, you’ll feel differently. Then you’ll treat me like every other man. You'll think I'm irrelevant compared to the Lilias of the world. You won't want me.”
He reached out and gently cupped her chin, pulling her face toward him. “You have a lot to learn about shifters, my dear. I can sense who you are underneath all that powder and paint. And that is the woman I want. Natural. Deep in the flesh and bone and blood of your true, most essential self. That is the woman I long for. When you are ready to show me, it will be the greatest honor of my life to see you.”
She tried to look away, but he wouldn't let her. He needed to make her understand. He needed her to know that he wasn't the man she believed him to be.
“I want to believe you,” she said in a small voice.
“When you get to know me better, you’ll come to understand the kind of man I truly am.”
“Oh, David, I'm so sorry that I'm so messed up inside. I know you're a good man.”
She started to cry, burying her face in her hands. He felt terrible that he had messed everything up when he was trying so hard to help.
“Please don't cry.” He handed her a tissue. “I have a surprise that I hope will cheer you up. Come with me.”
He took her hand and led her to his car. He opened the passenger door for her, and she slipped inside. Several minutes later, they were driving down the road toward one of the finest restaurants in Denver. When they pulled up outside, her eyes went wide with astonishment.
“How did you get reservations?” she asked as the parking attendant opened her door.
“I called in a favor with my connections,” he said.
He'd had Sampson hack into the database and make him a reservation. It wasn't the kind of thing that Hawk would normally approve of, but what Hawk didn't know wouldn't hurt him. His sweet Darcy could definitely use some pampering.
They walked into the restaurant hand-in-hand and were seated at a patio table under the twinkling porch lights. Soft music played and the warm summer breeze drifted over her bare shoulders. Rider ordered their finest bottle of wine, and Darcy flinched when the wine steward mentioned the year and vintage.
“Are you sure you want a three-hundred-dollar bottle of wine?” she asked.
“I only want the best for my first date with my mate,” he said. “We’ll never have this experience again.”
“I don't think I've ever had such a fine wine,” she said as the wine steward poured their glasses. “Not even in my wine tasting class in college.”
“This should be a real treat, then,” he said. “I'm so happy I get to share it with you.”
She looked at him with the strangest expression of befuddlement. After she'd explained her life story, Rider now understood that Darcy wasn't used to being treated like she mattered. That was a situation that needed to be remedied immediately. His mate mattered more than anything in the world. And he wanted her to know it.
They ordered the seven-course meal with wine pairings. Rider insisted they get the most expensive items on the menu, just to push her boundaries and expectations of what she deserved. He watched her eat the deliciously prepared food from the oysters to the filet mignon to the lemongrass sorbet for dessert.
His heart sang knowing how much his mate, the seasoned chef, enjoyed the fine fare. He wanted her to know how special she was for the first time in her life. With Rider in her life, it would certainly not be the last.
Chapter 12
All evening Darcy felt as if she was in a dream. It was the most amazing thing she'd ever experienced. She had heard other women talking about how magical it was to go on a wonderful date. They said it was like a fairytale. She had never really believed it, but now she knew it was true. David treated her like a lady, a special lady who was meant to be pampered and cherished.
He leaned across the table and took her hand, looking deeply into her eyes. His eyes sparkled like blue sapphires, twinkling in the light of the flickering candles.
“I want you to remember this night. I want you to remember what it feels like to have what you deserve. I will always treat you with the greatest honor and respect. I want you to know what you mean to me.”
“I wish I could make sense of it. But it's all so confusing. No one has ever treated me like you did tonight. I don't know what to think or feel.”
“I just want you to feel good. I want you to feel good about yourself and about me.”
“I'm trying. I really am.”
“I'm going to keep treating you like a princess until it really sinks in. And then I’m going to just keep doing it.”
“I don't know if I will be able to handle that,” she laughed.
“You will. You'll get used to it. I'll make sure of that.”
“What did I do to deserve a man like you?” she giggled, sipping her dessert wine.
“You are my mate and you deserve all the best things in life.”
“This is very overwhelming and sudden. I don't know what to do.”
“Let me show you,” he said, kissing her hand so gently it almost hurt.
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“I want to show you how beautiful you are to me. Maybe then you will believe me.”
“How will you do that?” she asked.
Her heart was pounding so hard it felt as if it might jump out of her chest. She knew enough about the world to understand what he meant. He wanted to make love to her. It had been so long, and it had only happened once. She didn't know if she could do it, but when she looked into David's eyes all her fear was gone, and all that was left was a deep longing to be with him.
“Okay.” Her throat was dry. “I'll let you show me.”
He took her hand and they walked out of the restaurant. He’d left the wait staff a giant tip with their bill. She was impressed by his generosity, but that was only one of the many things about David that she admired. Even though she was scared, she wanted to make love to him. More than she'd wanted anything for a long time.
The restaurant was in one of the nicest hotels in the area. David explained that he was staying there until he found a place. They made their way upstairs to the third floor to his room overlooking the pool. They stood on the balcony and drank another glass of wine. Her heart fluttered, and she tried unsuccessfully to get it under control.
David reached out for her and took her hand. He leaned over and delicately kissed her neck. A tingle of excitement ran down her spine, and she quivered with anticipation. He turned her around to look at him and smiled.
“I want you to come with me,” he said softly.
She followed him into the bathroom where he started to run the tub.
“What are you doing?”
“I need to see you without all of that stuff on. I need to see the real you.”
“David.” She started to shake. “I don't know if I can.”
“Don’t worry. I'm going to take care of you. I want you to see how
beautiful you are. Will you let me show you?”
“Okay,” she said in the softest voice.
The tub filled completely, and David slowly helped her out of her dress and into the warm, sweet-smelling water in her underwear. She felt nervous and bare until he began to strip down to his boxer briefs and got in beside her. Her nerves were replaced with something else. He was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. Tall and strong and amazing.
He began to help her wash the makeup from her face and the products from her hair. As each layer was removed, it revealed just a bit more of what she wanted to hide. She thought he would run away terrified at the sight, but instead he seemed to grow more and more pleased with what he saw.
“There you are,” he whispered as she was washed and scrubbed clean and feeling more like a drowned rat then a beautiful woman. “There’s my mate. There is the goddess underneath all of that paint.”
“I'm no goddess,” she whispered. “I'm just me.”
“Just you is a goddess. Just you is exactly what I want.”
He drew closer, reached out, and kissed her with such intensity, she thought he might devour her completely. She was caught up in his hunger and felt herself surrender to his need. She had never imagined a man would want her like this. But in that moment, as he held her tight in the warm water, she knew that it was the most natural thing in the world.
She felt more herself than she ever had. After a long, passionate kiss, he helped her out of the bath and wrapped her up in a warm fluffy bathrobe. She knew for the first time what it felt like to be nurtured and cherished. She never wanted to let that feeling go.
“Oh, David. I didn't know it could be like this. I didn't know.”
He gathered her up in his arms, his strength undeniable. He lifted her off her feet, and she gasped as he walked her into the bedroom and set her gently on the bed.
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