A Flawed Scotsman (Clan Ross Book 4)

by Hildie McQueen

  As she walked closer to her bedchamber, Esme stopped abruptly at seeing two guards at the doorway. “What is it?” She hurried closer to the men who gave her apologetic looks.

  One motioned to the open door. “Go inside, Lady Esme.”

  Had Ruari returned? Confused, she hurried into the bedchamber. It was only when the door slammed behind her and the latch sounded that she realized her predicament.

  Rushing to the balcony, she looked out. Everything looked normal. Guards were training, others stood atop the gates performing their duties. Maids hurried in from the well with water-filled buckets.

  People meandered on the road to and from the village. Her eyes misted at the normality of everyday life. While her heart shattered at Ruari’s departure, life outside continued.

  Peering down at the courtyard, she searched for her brother. “Where is Keithen?” she shouted at a young lad who carried kindling toward the kitchens.

  “I do not know, Lady Esme.” He scrunched his face as the sun hit it. “Would ye like me to fetch him?”

  “Aye, please. Hurry.”

  Moments later, Keithen stood outside and looked up at her. “I will speak to ye later. I have much to do.” He frowned up at her. “What are ye doing?”

  “Father had me locked in.”

  Keithen shook his head. “I will be there momentarily.”

  By the time Keithen came to the door, she’d grown tired of pacing. Already, she’d stood at the balcony, calculating ways to scale down and had inventoried which items she’d take with her upon leaving.

  Her brother’s large form filled the doorway. His dark gaze met hers for a long moment before he walked in.

  “Ruari asked me to let ye know that he plans to return for ye.”

  Breath left her at knowing he did not plan to abandon her. “What else did he say?”

  Her brother looked past her to the open balcony. “If ye wish to go to Ross lands, I will help ye. I’ll send an escort of men to travel with ye.”

  Esme didn’t need to think on it. “I must go, Brother. I cannot remain where my husband is no longer welcome.”

  “Ye must understand the burden our father carries. It was an outburst that he could not retract after speaking it in front of the council.”

  Esme crossed her arms. “So all of this is because of pride?”

  “We must stand united. I may argue with him, but I will never go against what he considers best for our clan.”

  “Even if it means marriage to a Mackenzie?” Esme asked.

  “How did ye know about that?”

  “Maids hear things.”

  “I do not wish to marry a Mackenzie. We will find another way to remain at peace with them.”

  “So ye stand against Father in this.” She crossed her arms. “How is that best for our clan then?”

  Keithen sighed. “It takes time to find a way, Esme. Our clan’s future depends on much. The continuance of our people living in peace is in peril.” He went back to the door. “Prepare whatever things ye may need. Not much, as ye must travel on horseback.”

  “I wish to see Catriona.”

  Keithen nodded. “I will escort ye.”

  She studied her brother’s handsome face, noticing new etches of worry on the sides of his lips and between his eyes. “Why do ye disobey Father in this, helping me? Then ye will obey him in something that will affect yer life.”

  There was a playful twitch to the corners of his lips. “Because I love ye, Sister, and wish the best for ye. Yer going to be with yer husband does not affect our clan.”

  Catriona stood by a basin splashing water on her face. Most of the bruising was less noticeable that day. Her friend’s beauty was returning.

  “I must go,” Esme said.

  “What happened…” at seeing Keithen, Catriona whirled away.

  “I will be outside,” Keithen said. “Do not linger.”

  Esme hurried to Catriona. “I must speak to ye. I require yer help in something.”

  “What is the matter?” Catriona’s eyes widened.

  Esme told her about her predicament and plans to leave.

  Catriona’s breath caught and her eyes teared up, but she did not cry. “Ye are going away then?”

  “Please see after my brother. He is caught in a horrible situation. I know ye are recovering and cannot speak to men yet. But please, I beg of ye, allow him to confide in ye.”

  “I am not sure…”

  “Remember how when we were but children, ye and he would spend hours looking up at the clouds and would chatter for long moments? He is still that same person, Catriona. Ye and he are like family.”

  Finally, Catriona nodded. “Very well.” Her friend hugged her tightly. “I will miss ye terribly.”

  “And I ye. I am sure we will visit each other once things settle.”

  Her friend’s lack of emotion crushed her heart. The bastard Mackenzies had extinguished Catriona’s zeal for life.

  As they walked back to her chamber, Esme touched Keithen’s arm. “Brother, promise me we will make them pay for what they did to her.”

  Although he didn’t say anything, when his gaze met hers, a shiver ran through Esme at the darkness within. Keithen was not himself, either. Her brother was black inside.

  They returned in silence until they reached her chamber. Esme took Keithen’s arm. “I am not sure I should go. The travel with escort means I take men away that could be here fighting if our clan is attacked.”

  “Ye should go.”

  It was to keep her safe. Her brother wished her to be away from what would happen. There was no doubt in Esme’s mind that the Mackenzie would attack. Her gut twisted at the situation. How could she leave at a time like this? Even though she was married to a Ross, her loyalty was to her family.

  Esme sunk onto the bed. “What will happen to us?”

  Her brother sat next to her and stared blindly forward. “We will continue to fight to keep our independence. Find out who is truly loyal to us and ensure to keep our people safe. With ye living safely at Ross Keep, that is one less thing I have to think about.”

  Leaning sideways, she nudged his shoulder. “Ever the watchful brother. I love ye so much.”

  Not one for displays of emotion, he stood and peered down at her. “Hurry and pack. We leave just before daybreak.”

  “Look after Catriona, Mother and Fa…”

  At the lift of his right brow, she stopped speaking. Of course, he would.

  “Look after yerself,” she finished.

  Keithen nodded and walked out.

  Once she was locked in, Esme fought with the decision of what to do. How could she leave her people at a time like this? Although she couldn’t fight, her archery skills were beyond reproach. When the Mackenzie attacked again, every single person that could fight would be needed.

  She slammed her fists into the bedding and let out a primal yell. A guard opened the door and peered in.

  “Go away!” Esme motioned to him with both hands.

  Without Ruari there, the bedchamber felt empty. She glanced about the room, trying to decide what to take. Other than a few clothes, she wanted very little. Hopefully, one day they’d return and she would be able to collect more of her things. For the moment, she would do with as little as possible.

  It was late by the time Keithen came to her chamber. She’d fallen asleep atop the bedding, fully dressed in breeches, a tunic and leather boots.

  As soon as he shook her, Esme was fully awake.

  Much later, the sky grew lighter as the sun rose and she rode away from her home and into an uncertain future.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  “Ye must return for her immediately,” Malcolm Ross repeated to Ruari, who tried without success to eat. Upon arriving, he’d been too angry to eat and now, a day later, nothing tasted good. Not knowing how Esme fared filled him with guilt.

  “I should not have left her behind,” he admitted. “I will return for her today.”

  His cous
in nodded. “I agree with not remaining there. Although I understand Laird Fraser being angry. Ye are part of his family and came there with warriors to help.”

  “A wife’s place is with her husband’s family,” Elspeth, Malcolm’s wife, interjected. “Otherwise, how is she to learn to become her own person?”

  Knowing it was fruitless to argue with the woman, Ruari remained silent.

  Malcolm, on the other hand, gave his wife a questioning look. “Her clan is in peril. They are constantly threatened by the Mackenzie.”

  “It is their battle to fight. However, I do believe the other Frasers should send a large contingent to remain with them. Why have they not done this?”

  At her statement, Ruari and Malcolm exchanged looks. Ruari frowned. “Ye are correct. I do not know why they have not. Perhaps some sort of family discord.”

  “They need to work on it.” Elspeth stood and leaned to kiss her husband’s cheek. “I best go see what the bairns are up to.”

  It was heartwarming to note how his usually hardened cousin watched his wife walk away, a slight curve to his lips.

  “I will leave now.” Ruari stood and stretched. “Yer wife is right. Esme belongs here.”

  Malcolm nodded. “Who is going with ye?”

  “I will take twelve. Although I do not expect any problems, there are always Mackenzies traipsing about. I do not wish to be taken to visit that man by force again.”

  “Very well. Take two archers. They often come in handy.”

  “Thank ye.” Ruari met his cousin’s gaze. “I will have to build a home on the lands left to me by yer father.”

  “Our father,” Malcolm corrected. “He loved ye as his own, equal to Tristan, Kieran and me.”

  “And I loved him the same.” Ruari had to clear his throat. The late laird’s death was still too real and raw.

  As he and the twelve men crested a nearby ridge, in the distance was a rider, escorted by warriors. Long, burnished brown hair had escaped its trappings and blew around her head like waves. The rider lifted a hand at spotting him and was immediately surrounded by six warriors. They did not fly a banner, nor did they wear a tartan identifying who they were.

  His cousin, Ewan, came alongside Ruari. “Friend or foe?”

  “It doesn’t matter, they are a small contingent. We should probably avoid them.”

  Ewan shrugged his broad shoulders, the bow and arrows on his back moving with the action. “Fly our banner,” he instructed to one of the warriors.

  They lifted up the red banner with three lions and rode forward. It was then the lone rider took off, urging the horse to a gallop toward them. The escorts seemed to be caught off guard as they gave chase.

  Ruari began laughing.

  “What is so funny?” Ewan asked.

  “That is my wife and she is furious.”

  Urging his own mount forward after asking the warriors to remain behind, Ruari dismounted and waited for Esme to near. He braced himself for what was sure to be a loud, verbal bashing.

  She practically leaped from her horse, the action admirable and he would have told her so but the punch to his jaw sent his head reeling sideways and he stumbled, caught unaware.

  “I will not be left behind. Ye left without a word!” Esme screamed and swung again. This time, he was able to avoid the strike. “How could ye?” She kicked him in the leg and Ruari bit back a curse.

  “Stop hitting me,” he snapped. “I was just now heading back to fetch ye…” He stopped speaking when she slapped him so hard his ears rang.

  Grabbing her hands, he held her in place. “Do not dare kick me,” he warned. “Allow me to speak.”

  Her eyes were glossed with tears of either anger or hurt. Probably both. “How did ye expect me to remain there?”

  “I should not have left ye. I have no excuse for it, other than being angry and acting rashly.”

  Ruari pulled her against him and held her tight, realizing how being away from her for just a few days had felt like an eternity. “I am very sorry.”

  Pushing away, she took a step backward. “Escort us to the Ross Keep. We have ridden without stopping and are tired and hungry.” Her face remained proud and his heart melted. His beautiful wife did her best to keep from breaking down. He understood. She’d brought men with her who were there to ensure her safety while, at the same time, she was responsible for them.

  “Ye have a warrior’s heart,” he told her, cupping her jaw. She immediately slapped his hand away.

  Although they rode back side by side, Esme kept her gaze forward and didn’t speak to him.

  Finally, Ewan came alongside and gave her a warm look. “How fares yer friend?”

  Esme let out a breath. “Much better. She still refuses to leave the bedchamber. She will never be the same, I fear.”

  “I believe women have a fighting spirit and are stronger than us in that manner.” Ewan met Ruari’s gaze sending a clear message to give them privacy. Although Ruari wanted to remain next to her, he understood.

  For the next hour, he remained annoyed that the conversation between Esme and Ewan continued unabated. They spoke of the area and he explained to her who lived at Dun Airgid. Esme listened and asked questions about the villagers and other things pertaining to life around Ross Keep.

  Every so often, she’d peer over her shoulder and spear him with a glare. In turn, he gave her apologetic looks. He’d not continue apologizing. His wife would have to accept it.

  Upon arriving at the keep, pride filled him as Esme’s eyes rounded at seeing the massive gates and huge stone building within. Ross Keep was perhaps three times the size of her home and housed many more people.

  Men and lads hurried to help with horses. Ewan began instructing the men to see about finding the Fraser guards a place to rest. Everyone was invited inside to the great room where they’d be fed.

  He took Esme’s elbow and escorted her to the main doorways just as Malcolm and Elspeth appeared.

  “My cousin, Laird Malcolm Ross,” Ruari said by way of introduction, “and his wife, Lady Elspeth Ross.”

  Malcolm nodded in acknowledgement. “Welcome to yer new home, Lady Esme.”

  Unlike her formal husband, Elspeth rushed forward and took Esme’s hands. The women were almost the exact same height. “Come inside, ye must be exhausted and famished. I will ensure to have a hot bath prepared for ye immediately. Upon eating, ye must bathe and rest.”

  “I am very tired and hungry,” Esme admitted, allowing Elspeth to guide her inside. The women went into the keep leaving Ruari only to stare at his wife’s departing figure.

  Malcolm studied him for a moment and chuckled. “By the cut on yer lip, she is not happy with ye.”

  “Not in the least,” he replied, giving his cousin a bland look.

  Esme slept most of the day with Ruari keeping constant vigil. When night fell and she’d yet to speak to him, he slid into the bed and reached for her.

  Although she was half-asleep, she turned away from him. Ruari groaned in frustration and lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling. Once morning came, he’d have a talk with his wife and settle things.

  *

  Sunlight streamed in through the window and Esme stretched. She opened her eyes and was immediately confused at the strange surroundings. Her heart settled at recalling she was now at Ross Keep.

  How long had she slept?

  There was movement as the wind blew the window coverings. Ruari stood at the opening, looking out. He was dressed already, his broad back to her as he studied the view.

  Esme couldn’t help taking him in. He was so handsome and strong. He moved with the grace of self-assuredness, despite his muscular build.

  Instead of raving or yelling, he always kept his voice even. She recalled with guilt having struck him the day before. Instead of hitting her back, which would have been in his rights, he’d restrained her and spoken in low tones.

  “What do ye see?” she asked, sliding from the bed.

  He turned
to her, his hazel gaze questioning and then back to the view. “A large group from the village comes. I assume there is something important they wish to discuss with Malcolm.”

  “Yer laird is much younger than I expected,” Esme said. “Does he carry the burden well?”

  Ruari nodded. “Aye, he does. I am proud of him.”

  When she neared, he instantly put his arm around her and pulled Esme to his side. Together, they looked out and she was astounded by the difference between Ross lands and her family’s. There was a large loch to the right, next to it a huge field of colorful flowers. In the distance, farms were visible as well as a thick forest.

  “How far is the village?” she asked.

  “Not far, just an hour or so,” Ruari replied and looked to her.

  Immediately, she focused on the cut on his bottom lip. Too proud to admit she’d been wrong to hit him, Esme met his gaze. “I am still angry with ye.”

  He responded with a light kiss to her lips. “And I am still sorry to have left without speaking to ye.”

  Unable to keep from it, she wrapped her arms around his waist and placed her head on his chest. “I wish to always be wherever ye are.”

  He hugged her close. “Me, as well.”

  “Get dressed, it is late. I do not wish to miss first meal.”

  Upon entering the great room, she was once again astounded at the sheer size of the keep. There were over ten tables, all with people eating. At the high board, there were three men in addition to the laird. Ruari motioned to the table. “The one next to Malcolm is Tristan, who is second born. The one next to him is Kieran. He is the youngest.” Both men were huge and attractive. Kieran however, was astoundingly stunning.

  “The older man is my uncle, Gregor, advisor to the laird.”

  “Do their wives not sit with them?”

  “Aye, they do for most meals.” Ruari looked to a table on the far side of the room. “They sit over there at the moment.”

  The women sat around a table chatting and laughing. The laird’s wife, whom she’d met the day before, waved her over and she looked to Ruari.

  “They are probably plotting something.”