“I’ll start a fire.” She tossed her purse aimlessly on the table as if she hadn’t almost given me a heart attack with her stupid, thoughtless antics and ambled over to the fireplace.
Rage grew in the pit of my stomach. “Are you fucking joking? That’s all you’ve got to say? I swear to god, Athena, I’ll—”
She spun around to face me. “You’ll what, Ryker?” she spat, shrugging out of her coat and letting it fall to the floor. “Allow me to finish that thought on your behalf. You’ll do nothing because, where I’m concerned, you’re the nothing guy. You’re too scared to own up to your feelings, to accept that regardless of whatever is going on between us, the very least you owe me is honesty.”
I moved faster than I thought myself capable, considering my limbs had turned to ice. I curved my freezing hands around her face and covered her mouth with mine. My heart thundered against my ribcage, the sound resonating in my ears, like a tornado devastating everything in its path. Athena had destroyed me for anyone else, and I’d spent every second since the night she’d crawled into my bed seven years ago trying to forget her.
She knitted her hands into my hair, her fingertips playing with the nape of my neck in a way that sent me crazy. Our tongues danced to music only we could hear, every inch of her body melding into mine.
This is where I’m meant to be. This is home.
I tore my lips from hers, nuzzling the soft skin of her throat. The smell of her perfume, and her own scent lingering beneath was more intoxicating than any drug.
“Ryker,” she breathed. “Please. Don’t deny me. Don’t deny us.”
With a groan, I maneuvered her to the couch, my body caging hers, my lips ravaging every bare inch of skin. I burrowed beneath her sweater and cupped her breast through a thin layer of lace. I brushed my thumb over her nipple, standing proud beneath the strip of fabric. She cried out, arching into me. The next second, she draped her legs around my waist and rubbed her core over my painfully hard dick.
I shrugged out of my coat, still kissing her, touching her. My breath came in shallow pants, a sheen of sweat breaking out over my skin. Pushing her sweater up around her neck, I tugged down the cup of her bra and sucked her nipple into my mouth.
“Ryker,” she breathed.
Her fingers fumbled with my belt. She ripped open my button fly and burrowed inside, her hand wrapping around my erection…
No!
I scrambled to my feet, hastily refastening my pants. I raked a hand through my hair.
“Fuck, I’m sorry. I can’t, Athena. We can’t.”
She came after me, her sweater falling back into place as she stood, cutting off the sight of her amazing breasts. I bemoaned the loss at the same time as being grateful for it.
She gripped my upper arms. “We can, Ryker. We’re adults. We can do whatever we want. I want you, and I know you want me.”
I shook my head, denial that I wanted her at all on the tip of my tongue. Except I couldn’t say the words, because they weren’t true. And Athena knew they weren’t true. Instead, I plumped for, “Elliot would forgive you, but he’d never forgive me. I’m so sorry. I wish things were different, but they’re not.”
I grazed my knuckles over her warm cheek, then leaned down and kissed her softly, briefly. And then I strode outside, jumped into my car, and drove away.
I didn’t look back.
13
Ryker
Brushing a few specs of dust off my suit jacket, I frowned into the mirror. Another ROGUES Christmas party. Another year almost gone. Another empty year looming.
Since walking out on Athena after our make-out session at the cabin, I’d decided to try to move on with my life. In a few weeks, I’d be twenty-nine. One year off thirty. Time was passing me by, and although I’d achieved enormously in the business world, my personal life sucked.
“So handsome.” Lissie smiled at our reflection in the mirror that hung over the fireplace in her living room. She linked her arm through mine. “We look good together, don’t we?”
I’d invited Lissie to accompany me tonight as part of the whole ‘moving on’ plan, but now the time had come to leave, I was having second thoughts. Lissie was a nice woman, and she deserved to be with a man who could commit. Not a man whose heart belonged to another.
Easing up my shirt sleeve, I checked my watch. “Time to go,” I said, ignoring her question. I didn’t want to give her false hope, especially as regret at inviting her at all began to sit heavily on my chest. I’d made her no promises, but that didn’t make me any less of an asshole.
I answered a few emails on the journey to the hotel where this year’s Christmas event was being held. Lissie happily chatted away, either unaware of my morose and self-pitying mood, or deciding to ignore it. Despite the sour taste in my mouth, the minute we entered the hotel, I had no choice but to play the congenial host. Our employees looked forward to the Christmas party each year, and they didn’t deserve to have their event spoiled by me. I stopped a couple of times on the way to the main reception room to share a word here and there, and to remind everyone to take advantage of the open bar, a comment met with broad smiles and lots of thank you’s. The ROGUES team worked damned hard. They should have a share in the spoils as much as—if not more than—the senior leadership team. Giving them a fabulous night to remember was the least we could do. We ran similar events at our other locations in the weeks running up to Christmas, and at least one of the board attended each party. We wanted our workforce to feel special no matter where they were situated, although as New York was our biggest office by far, most—if not all of us—usually made it to this event.
I ordered Lissie a glass of champagne, choosing a scotch over ice for myself, and rested my elbow on the bar, scanning the room. I couldn’t see Athena anywhere. Maybe she’d decided not to come.
No, if she had, Elliot would have mentioned it.
“This champagne is delicious,” Lissie enthused, clearly trying to jolly me out of my ever-darkening mood.
I rewarded her with a faint smile. “Only the best at a ROGUES event.”
She smiled softly, and her kind eyes roved over my face. “Maybe a dance later?”
“Sure,” I said, although I stopped paying attention as a sight that almost gave me a cardiac arrest appeared in the entranceway.
Athena had poured her perfect, womanly curves into a figure-hugging, off-the-shoulder burnt-orange dress with a neckline that revealed a cleavage I’d give my right kidney to stick my tongue into. Or my dick. Yeah, dick was the better choice. I bet I’d come in ten seconds, my cock cocooned by those fabulous creamy tits.
She paused, glancing behind her, then gestured. A guy stepped forward and captured her hand, an action that bored a fucking great hole right through my gut. I recognized him. Definitely an employee. Paul? Phillip? Peter? Yeah, Peter. That was it. A jackass from the finance department.
Finance department? Athena needed excitement in her life, not a guy who orgasmed over a fucking balance sheet.
At least she hadn’t brought Charles. Scaring off an employee wouldn’t be a challenge. Charles, though, would present an altogether trickier prospect.
“Hello, Earth to Ryker.” Lissie nudged me.
I kept my eyes fixed on Athena as Peter, the soon-to-be-fired accountant, whispered in her ear. She looked up at him, laughing.
I wasn’t laughing.
Lissie touched my arm. “Ryker, are you all right?”
When I didn’t respond, she followed my gaze.
“Ah,” she said. “I understand.”
I glanced down at her. “No, you don’t.”
She raised up on tiptoes and kissed my cheek. “You’re gorgeous, kind, and rich. My perfect man.” She offered up a wan smile. “But I should have realized what was going on at Athena’s homecoming, and I have too much self-respect than to play second fiddle to another woman.” Picking up her champagne, she drained the glass, then set it on the bar. “I hope you two work it out.”
&n
bsp; “Lissie,” I called out as she walked away.
She paused and glanced over her shoulder, a tinge of hopefulness mingled with acceptance in her expression.
“I’m sorry.”
She gave me a soft smile. “I know you are.”
She sidled through throngs of people, making her way toward the exit. I made no attempt to follow her. My focus returned to Athena, my eyes sliding over her body in that dress. God, that dress. I wanted to peel it off. Slowly. Then—
“When are you and Athena gonna finally bump uglies?”
I snapped my head to the right to find Oliver standing beside me. “What?”
Oliver raised an eyebrow. “Dude, your tongue is almost on the floor. And you might want to button up your jacket. The employees don’t need to see one of the board members walking around with a baseball bat in their pants. And you’re usually so good at hiding it, too.”
I growled but followed his advice on the jacket. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Oliver shook his head. “Don’t disrespect me. I have eyes, Ryker.”
I sighed, long and hard. “How long have you known?”
He gave a hint of a smile. “I can’t count that high.”
“Do the others know?” I asked, unease swirling in my gut.
He shook his head. “No. At least not that I’m aware of, and I’m damned sure they’d have mentioned it. To me at least.”
As long as I’d known Oliver, he’d been attuned to the world around him. Me and the other guys were too busy conquering the latest business deal—or the latest woman—to pay enough attention to each other’s love lives.
“If you utter a word to Elliot, or any of the guys, I’ll take a fucking baseball bat to your balls.”
He laughed. “My IQ may be a few points behind yours, Ryker, but I’m not stupid. I’d rather not be the one to break the news to Elliot.”
“And nor would I. Hence, I’m over here and she’s over there with some jerk-off from Finance. Remind me to look into the overstaffing in that department on Monday.”
Oliver rolled his eyes. “Leave the poor guy alone. He’s clearly a stooge in this fucked-up thing you’ve both got going on, as is your date.”
“I don’t have a date. She left.”
“Smart girl. Women can smell a man whose attention is elsewhere at a hundred miles.” He grew serious. “Listen, you need to answer one question. What does Athena mean to you? If she’s a one fuck wonder, then do us all a favor and leave well alone. However, if there’s the possibility she means more, then you need to talk to Elliot. Athena is a grown woman, not a little girl. Elliot needs to realize that. His biggest worry will be that you’ll jerk her around. If you’re serious about a relationship with her, then talk to him. He’ll get over it.” He smiled. “Eventually. And in the intervening period, I’ll warn the board to wear crash helmets.”
I laughed, despite the despondency weighing heavily on me. Oliver clapped my shoulder.
“Just think about what I’ve said.”
I nodded. As Oliver went to walk away, I called him back. “Keep it zipped, yeah?”
He winked. “Mum’s the word. Or rather, Athena’s the word.”
“I mean it, Oliver,” I warned.
“Relax, Ryker. Your secret is safe with me, regardless of whether you choose to act on it or not.”
He wandered off. I sipped my drink, my gaze returning to Athena who’d taken a seat on the other side of the room, her asswipe of a date sitting opposite. Laughing at something he said, she leaned forward and squeezed his hand.
I turned away, unable to stomach the sight for another second. I thought about what Oliver had said. Could there be a slim chance Elliot might accept a relationship between Athena and me, especially if I managed to convince him she meant much more to me than a quick fuck? And was I willing to take the risk that my admission could ruin a life-long friendship?
14
Athena
I am a horrible person.
Poor Peter. He asked me out on a date my first week working at ROGUES which, of course, I’d declined. But that hadn’t deterred him. He continued to ask me out once a week ever since. Okay, so that was only four weeks in total, but still, I admired his persistence. When he invited me to attend the ROGUES Christmas party as his date, his eyes beseeching me to accede, I reluctantly agreed.
And now, I was having regrets.
When Ryker left me alone at the cabin, I’d thought long and hard about what to do next. I was absolutely certain of one thing: Ryker wanted me as much as I wanted him. His body, all urgent and hard and erect, confirmed that he found me physically attractive. And contrasted with the tenderness of his touch, the feel of his lips on my skin, the devastation in his eyes as he’d pulled away, that convinced me his feelings went deeper than purely physical. He could fall in love with me if he’d only find a way to square the circle with the terrible guilt he carried inside him. He’d kept me at arm’s length for years as a way of protecting himself and his relationship with Elliot—a virtual no-win situation—not to mention how tricky things would be at ROGUES if he and Elliot fell out.
Finally, I’d come to a decision. I had to find a way to force Ryker to face the cold, hard facts that we were meant to be. Neither of us was happy apart and, although I completely understood his fierce reticence in regard to Elliot, by working together and standing together, we could find a way to break the news to my brother at the right time.
And poor Peter was my unknowing pawn. I’d stayed away from men after realizing I compared them all to Ryker, which meant I couldn’t commit to a relationship. But seeing Ryker’s angry response to Charles had lit a spark of an idea. I originally asked Charles to accompany me, but he was overseas for the holiday season. When Peter asked me if I’d go with him as his date, I’d leaped at an opportunity I couldn’t pass up. Cruel? Absolutely. Desperate people did desperate things. And not one person in this room was as desperate as me.
Except it wasn’t working. Ryker had barely cast a glance in my direction since I’d arrived an hour ago. I sneaked a peek out of the corner of my eye. I’d expected him to have a date on his arm, but from what I’d gleaned with my surreptitious perusals, he appeared to be alone.
“Would you like to dance, Peter?” I asked, plan B forming at an exponential rate.
“Indeed, I would,” he replied formally.
I suppressed a giggle. Peter was an old-school kinda guy. Polite to a fault, gentlemanly, considerate. The exact opposite of Ryker. Peter would never grab my hair and kiss me forcefully, make me feel things I craved to experience over and over. And that, in the end, was the issue. I didn’t want a polite guy my parents would approve of. I wanted to burn in the flames of passion, to have my patience tested, to fight fervently, to make up fiercely, as if it was the last time we’d ever touch each other.
I took his hand and led him onto the dance floor near where Ryker was talking with Garen. Peter’s gleaming eyes held a shine of triumph as he wrapped his arms around my waist, and I slipped mine over his shoulders.
“I’m so glad you agreed to come with me tonight, Athena. I’m the luckiest man here.”
An icy chill prickled my skin, and a sour taste crept up into my throat. This is all wrong. I wasn’t this person, the type to use others to further their own ends, regardless of hurting them in the process. Peter was a nice guy. He deserved better than this.
“Would you excuse me,” I murmured when the song came to an end and another one started up. “I need the restroom.”
“Of course,” Peter said, immediately releasing me.
I dashed across the dance floor, leaving the noise and excitement behind me. Spotting the ladies’ room, I entered. A few girls I recognized from the sales department had taken over the sink area. Giggly and drunk, they chattered as they reapplied their lipstick and sprayed clouds of perfume in the air.
I nodded and said hello, then disappeared into the very end stall. Closing the door, I rested my forehead
against the cool wood. I’d take a few minutes to gather myself, then talk to Peter, tell him it wasn’t going to work out, and apologize if I, in any way, had led him on. It was the right and fair thing to do.
Tomorrow I’d research the possibility of joining a nunnery.
I blew my nose on some toilet tissue and threw it in the pan, flushing the chain. I went to unlock the door when a deep baritone voice, the voice of my dreams—and my nightmares—drifted over.
“Ladies, this bathroom is closed. There’s another on the other side of the lobby.”
What the heck?
Sounds of the girls gathering their makeup reached me, along with a few hushed tones and murmurs followed by the shuffling of feet, then silence.
I held my breath, waiting. Ryker clearly hadn’t switched his career from CEO to janitor, which meant he knew I was here, and had purposely followed me. I strained my ears but couldn’t hear a thing. Maybe he’d left already.
“I know you’re there, Ryker. What the hell are you playing at?”
Nothing but silence greeted me.
Shit, what if there was a problem, like a fire? No, there couldn’t be. For one, there’d be an alarm clanging and the fire department would be clearing the room, not Ryker. Plus, he’d have told the girls to get outside, not use another bathroom a few feet away.
“Stop playing games, Ryker.”
Still no response.
Quietly, I slid the lock back in its holding and peeked around the door. My heartbeat skyrocketed. Ryker was leaning against the row of sinks, fiddling with his cufflinks. I glanced back into the stall, hoping for a window I could sneak out of. That’d serve him right. Sadly, I wasn’t the lucky kind of gal.
Fronting it out, I opened the door and crossed over to the sinks. Neither of us spoke. I washed my hands, dried them on a towel, then tossed it into the laundry basket. Next, I unclipped my purse, removed a lipstick, and touched up my makeup.
Entranced (The ROGUES Billionaire Series Book 1) Page 11
