Why does Theresa have to be so damned observant and smart? She’s killing me here. “You should know that I’m always one step ahead. I’ll leave them on his doorstep while he’s at work one day. No big deal, really. Does that work for you?”
“You’re a good girl, Abby, but one look at your face and it’s clear he’s not some guy you’re going to fuck and forget. I’d say you love him, but then again I would assume and we all know what happens when we assume.” With a chuckle and a wink, she ends the conversation and goes back to work.
I’ll be the first to admit, she’s absolutely right! Somewhere in between the random hook ups and last night, I fell in love with Lucas Knight. I’m so screwed. Lucas is not the guy you’d want holding your heart in his hands. Either he would squeeze it too tightly or his hands would open and shatter your heart when it hit the ground. I know there’s a good man somewhere inside of him, but I’m afraid he has too much baggage and ambition to commit to a woman.
The rest of the day flies by without a hitch, and if I had to take a wild guess, I’d say it had something to do with the comfort of my own clothes. It sure made my job a lot easier since I didn’t need to hold up my pants, but I miss his scent. Okay, not going there at the moment. In fact, I’ll do a batch of laundry when I get home and bring it to him first thing in the morning. Because if I don’t, I’ll sleep in his clothes just to feel him next to me. Yep, I have it so bad.
At five p.m. on the dot, I walk out of Java Joe’s with a new outlook on life. Except for dropping off his clothes tomorrow, if Lucas wants me, it’s his turn to chase me. I’m done with making the first move and making it too easy for him. The game starts now. Okay, maybe once I drop off his cloths.
By the time I get home, the last thing I want to do is laundry. I’m exhausted since I worked almost a ten-hour shift and the fact that I didn’t get much sleep last night. Technically, that’s all on me, but I plan to make up for it tonight. So, after throwing in a load, I saunter into the bathroom and prepare myself a bath. I think that might be just what I need to soothe my achy bones and feet.
I wake up in a start with cold water enveloping me on all sides. Ah, fuck. I fell asleep in the goddamned tub! Wonderful, I could have drowned and no one would have found me for days.
After drying off, I slip into my warmest jammies and jump into bed. The clothes will just have to wait until morning.
Tonight, I’m going to sleep.
Alone.
19
Lucas
My world tips on its axis when I received an urgent call from Caleb’s secretary. Our audition has been changed from the twenty-eighth to the twenty-first because of a family emergency. As soon as the call ended, I grabbed my spare duffle bag, sent the band a group text, and headed out. I thought about stopping by Java Joe’s to grab one last specialty coffee, but I didn’t want to get sidetracked. Abby’s a very sexy distraction that I need to avoid at all costs. Especially since we’ll be one-hundred percent focused on our music until our audition is over. For whatever reason, I feel like the band’s future weighs heavily on my shoulders.
Since I procrastinated for way too long, it looks like the new songs I desperately wanted to finish will need to wait. All of our time and energy will be on practice, practice, practice. Oh, and not trying to kill one another since we’ll be spending so much time together.
By the time I step inside Trevor’s house, everyone’s waiting on me. Hell, I thought I walked fast but apparently not fast enough. I haven’t had time to close the door, and they’re already bombarding me with questions.
“Hey, hold up!” I shout over them. “All I know is there’s some kind of family emergency, so Caleb’s secretary told me the date was pushed up a week. Our audition is Saturday at two. Depending on how many bands audition, we either get ten or twenty minutes to perform. The judges will have their final decision by Sunday at six. I don’t know about you guys but I’m freaking the fuck out here.”
“There’s no reason to freak out, man,” Jet assures me. “We’ve been practicing and playing gigs for years now. We got this. All we need is to figure out what songs we can play to knock ‘em dead.” Jet has always been the level-headed one of the bunch. The one who talks me down from the edge time and time again. He’s been my best friend, ever since I jammed with the reclusive busker on a cold, damp sidewalk almost eight years ago. Not long after, The Sinful Seven was complete.
“I know, I know. I’m just frustrated that they moved up the date and I didn’t have time to finish some new songs, is all.”
Willow plops down on the chair next to me and shrugs. “The great thing about it is they won’t know if it’s our old stuff or not. Think about it. We haven’t gone live on social media in quite a while, so why don’t we practice our new songs and move on?”
Everyone chimes in with a hell yeah, except for me. Maybe I’m being a perfectionist or an asshole, but that’s on me, not them. We have two full days with a few hours in between to practice, and that’s the best we can do. The rest will be up to the judges.
After grabbing our drinks, we head downstairs to do what we do. Nothing or no one at this point will stop us from pursuing our dreams.
Several hours later, we take our first break. Jet and Trevor are jonesing for something to eat, while Willow heads for the nearest bathroom. All I need is fresh air. Without saying a word, I walk out the front door and pop a squat on the top stair. I’m hot, sweaty, and my throat is raw from giving it my all. I must admit, the cool breeze feels amazing against my heated skin. Better than being cooped up in the basement with a bunch of men oozing testosterone and one sweet-ass girl. I’d die for every single one of them, but knowing that I’m obligated to stay put for the next few days has me crawling out of my skin. Oh well, it is what it is.
Leaning back, I rest my elbows against the deck and tilt my face into the sun. So warm and relaxing. My phone’s been blowing up my pocket all damn day, but I haven’t had time to look at it once and I’m not sure I even want to. Outside of my band, there’s no one out there that I give a damn about, so there’s that. Sorry, I spoke too soon. I’d gladly respond to a text from Abby. She’s the only one who could put a smile on my face—even on my worst day.
Moaning with the memory of her taste on my tongue, I reach inside and pull out my phone. The second I swipe, I realize my big mistake. It’s not my sexy girl wishing for an encore, it’s my piece of shit brother, Landon. Well, sucks to be him. I delete every single one of his messages without reading any of them. There’s nothing he can do or say that’s important enough for me to give a fuck.
Of course, curiosity just put me in a shitty mood. Why the hell did I even bother? Now I feel pissy because it wasn’t my sexy barista. Ah fuck, I just can’t win for trying.
“There you are. We’ve been looking everywhere for you.” Willow plops down next to me and although I’m livid, it’s not her fault.
“Just breathing in some fresh oxygen instead of all that carbon monoxide hiding in that basement.” I roll my shoulders, crack my neck, and stand up, holding out my hand.
When Willow puts her hand in mine, I pull her up. “Ready to do this?” I ask.
“As ready as I’ll ever be.” She gives me a wink and we walk into the house swinging our hands. Thanks to Willow, I’m in a much better mood.
***
Abby
I’ve been singing the same damn song over and over again as I walk to Lucas’s. The sucky part is it’s one of his songs, and I just can’t seem to get it out of my head. You know, the catchy song that just sticks in your mind and no matter what you do it creeps back in. Well, at least it’s a great song, so there’s that.
Clinging tightly to the clean laundry at my chest, I press the button for the fourth floor. My heart is thudding so loudly I feel like I’m going to pass out. Seriously. The hell with the song. Now my mantra is drop and go, drop and go, drop and go. When he opens the door, I’ll hand him the bag and then run. Well, maybe I won’t run, but I’m not hangin
g around unless he asks. No, Abby! You need to play hard-to-get instead of falling to your knees every time he’s in front of you. Right? One look at him and I’m going to lose it, I just know it.
The moment the doors slide open, I feel like a deer caught in the headlights. Move, Abby. It’s now or never. With one foot in front of the other, I step outside the elevator. I can do this!
I stop in mid-stride when I notice a well-dressed man knocking on Lucas’s door. With around eight feet separating the two of us, he casually glances over at me. Wow, he’s really hot if you’re into that mafia kinda vibe. I’m nervous when his eyes rake over me from head to toe and back up again. Lingering on my boobs longer than I’m comfortable with. Awkward and scary.
“He’s not home,” the stranger with the fancy suit and the mafia vibes says nonchalantly. “Do you know where he is? I really need to talk to him and he’s not answering my texts.”
“Um, and who might you be?” The guy’s incredibly handsome, but I’m not feeling comfortable in the hall all alone with him. Obviously he knows Lucas, but I don’t know him.
“The name’s Landon Knight. Are you his new flavor of the week?” Oh, I hate the handsome and arrogant pricks. It’s a shame I don’t know where Lucas is, but even if I did, I wouldn’t tell this asshole a damn thing.
“Our relationship is none of your business, Landon. And since I don’t plan on ever seeing you again, I won’t bother introducing myself. Perhaps your blatant disrespect for people is the reason he’s not answering his texts.”
A deep chuckle resonates throughout the hall as I spin on my heels and go back where I came from. My only coherent thought is Please let me get in that elevator alone. I don’t want to be trapped with this offensive man. No such luck—I hear his expensive Italian shoes follow me down the hall.
“I like your tenacity, I will say that. Look, I’m sorry you weren’t able to drop off your gift to my brother.”
Of course I’m the one who’s punching all the damn buttons as Landon leans on the wall with his arms crossed. Why is this damn elevator taking its sweet ass time? I’m so over this shit already.
I’m seconds away from running down the stairwell when the door pings, mocking me. I startle when he suggests, “Ladies first,” while gesturing with his hand for me to step inside. Fantastic.
With my heart pounding, I enter and immediately regret it. Instead of keeping his distance, he stands right next to me after pressing the button. He’s intimidating, but I don’t feel threatened by him. Maybe if he hadn’t made the snide comment about “being the flavor of the week,” I wouldn’t feel like this.
“If you see Lucas in the next few days, it would be great if you could tell him to call me. I have some time-sensitive papers to go over with him.”
“I’ll make sure to tell him I ran into you at his apartment.” But I won’t add the part about the creepy crawly feeling I have around him.
I want to burst through the door once it opens, but Landon has other plans when he grabs my arm.
“Take your hands off of me, now.”
He immediately lets go—smart move on his part since there are cameras inside this elevator and inside the lobby.
“I hope you have time to deliver what’s inside of that bag real soon, darling. Oh, and tell my little brother that I can’t wait to tell him his taste in women has improved immensely since the last time I stopped by.” I don’t bother with the niceties. I just haul ass out of the confinement of the elevator and suck in a breath of fresh air.
Well, that went great. Not! So much for ripping off the Band-Aid and dropping off his clothes. I’m finding out that nothing comes easy with Lucas. It’s not all black and white, there’s a gray area, too. And, I’m not going to lie, him not being at his apartment that early in the morning sets off all kinds of alarm bells in my brain. I thought for sure after the night we had that he’d sleep in for days. I know I’m still feeling the after effects, but in a very delicious way.
After entering my apartment, I set down the bag by the front door. Tomorrow’s another day. Let’s hope that Lucas will be home and his brother won’t get the bright idea to go there again.
20
Lucas
Last night I slept like shit. Too many things running through my mind, and I can’t shut it down no matter how hard I try. I was fine all day long when the band and I were jamming, but when the house is quiet I have too much time to think. Then the what-ifs wreak havoc on my brain.
What if we’re not good enough?
What if we don’t win the audition?
What if I can’t make a career out of music?
What if I need to accept that check from Landon?
These kinds of thoughts are what keep me awake at night. That I’m not good enough. That I’ll never be good enough. And, yeah, maybe it’s one of the reasons I push the band so hard. I see the looks on their faces, they want it as badly as I do, but they don’t think they need to practice a million songs they already know. Repeatedly. That’s where they're wrong! We are only going to get one shot at this audition, so we need to make it memorable. Remarkable. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, you’re just as good as the next guy. Which means you need to be the best to stand out from the rest.
With a frustrated sigh, I climb out of bed and throw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Why bother tossing and turning when it’s inevitable I’ll never fall back to sleep? Even the thought of closing my eyes and masturbating to a pair of luscious tits and emerald eyes does nothing for me. How fucked up is that? Especially coming from a sex addict who normally has sex on the brain non-stop. I don’t know. I’m hoping it’s because I’m not in my own bed and not because I’ve lost my libido or something. Well, that would suck!
It's only 6 A.M. when I go downstairs, so I don’t expect anyone to be up and about. And then the scent of freshly brewed coffee reaches me and lures me right in. Apparently, I’m not the only one who couldn’t sleep. Rounding the corner, I’m not surprised to see Mrs. C sitting at the table sipping a cup of coffee.
“Morning, Lucas. I had a feeling the instant you smelled coffee I’d have some company.” God, this woman. She’s so fucking amazing and I won’t let anything happen to her while I’m still breathing. I kiss the top of her head before grabbing a big mug when she adds, “There're pancakes and eggs in the warming tray. Just help yourself.”
“Ya know, if you keep this up you’ll never get rid of us.” She smiles and this time it reaches her eyes. Such a wonderful sight to see.
“I truly love having all of you here. This house is way too big for just Trevor and me. Stay as long as you like.”
Since I have a mouthful of her famous blueberry pancakes, I squeeze her hand in confirmation. I don’t understand how Trevor can live in this house and not be overweight.
“Do you remember how we used to fight for the last cup of coffee in the morning?” I ask. This time when the corner of her lips turn up, her eyes don’t smile like before.
Hesitantly, I reach for her hand and she clings to me for dear life. Fuck! I’m going to lose my shit. “Talk to me, Mrs. C. I’m right here.”
A sob like nothing I’ve ever heard rips through her chest. The next thing I know, I’m kneeling next to her and she’s wrapped in my arms. I have no words of comfort since I can’t promise everything’s going to be all right. I have no fucking clue. Fuck Cancer! She’s such a wonderful woman, and she shouldn’t be going through this when there are so many nasty people in this world. It’s so not fair!
I’m not sure how long we’ve been in this position when she pulls away. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. Here, let me grab you some hot food and throw that out for you.”
“You stay right there, I got this.” I don’t have the heart to tell her I’ve lost my appetite. So, I scrape off my plate and fill it with a new batch. It’s not brimming with food like last time, but I’m hoping she won’t notice.
After a few tasteless bites and an unco
mfortable silence, I decide to put my two cents in whether or not she wants to hear it. “I can’t imagine what you’re going through or what you’re even thinking anymore. So I’m just going to get this off my chest. You can tell me to shut the fuck up, but first hear me out.” She nods when our eyes lock in a shared understanding.
“I desperately want to promise you that everything’s going to be all right. Unfortunately, we both know it would be an empty promise. What I can do is give you my word that I got your boy. Whether we win or lose this audition, Trevor will be here whenever you need him. You will never be alone. That’s my solemn promise to you.” I don’t add the part about never paying another medical bill, because if I did she would throttle me within an inch of my life. We both startle when Trevor walks into the room.
“Mom, what’s going on?” Busted.
***
Abby
Once again, I stopped by to drop off the bag for Lucas and he wasn’t home. I decided not to leave the bag by his door, just in case the creeps of New York stole them. It would be kinda weird to see someone walking around wearing Lucas’s clothes. Hey, stop laughing. I know I’m weird like that, but it also gives me a reason to go back. Besides, I didn’t want to be late for work. I might have jumped his bones if I knew he was home. No judgement.
I tuck the bag behind the counter after walking into the coffee shop. It’s slow in here today, so I decide to work on the books while I have some free time. “Give me a holler if it gets busy, Maria. I’m going to be in my office.”
“Will do. I’m sure you’ll have more fun than me. Kinda slow today.” She grabs a rag and begins wiping everything down. Knowing her, she probably did it ten times already.
Lucas: A Rockstar Romance (The Sinful Seven Series Book 1) Page 12
