“We don’t have anything, Asher. Let me go. You’re hurting me.” Pain spidered out from where his fingers wrapped around her arm.
“Drew will never see you as anything more than a small town dancer who is easy on the eyes.”
The crack sounded before she realized she’d slapped him. It reverberated against the side of the building until it was all she heard. People stumbling from the bar took little notice of the girl with fissures forming in her heart.
Not because the man she loved hurt her with his words. No, she didn’t love Asher. But because, for the first time, she realized her best friend was hardly her friend at all. Small moments flashed through her mind as if his vitriol finally allowed her to see who he truly was. He’d never cared for her. Never considered her feelings.
If she hadn’t been so afraid of losing him, maybe she would have let him go ages ago.
Asher stared at her, his chest heaving. There was no mark where her hand hit, but the action was there on his face.
“Lo…” The anger faded from his eyes, but it was too late.
She took a step back and then another.
“Are you okay?” She’d never been happier to hear the purr of Noah’s voice.
Lola continued to stare at Asher. “Yeah. Yes. I think I am.” She turned to Noah. “Can you get me out of here?”
He nodded, his gaze going from Lola to Asher. “We walked.”
From where, she didn’t know. All she knew was that it had to be better than standing on that sidewalk looking at Asher. “Okay, let’s go.”
She didn’t look back at Asher to see if he felt sorry for what he’d said. It was no longer her job to care.
Silence stretched between her and Noah, and she pulled out her phone, wanting to respond to Drew but not knowing if she had it in her tonight.
“What did I interrupt back there?” Noah glanced over his shoulder.
She hugged her arms tighter around herself as a shiver skated up her spine. “Just Asher being Asher. He’s been drinking.”
“Is he even old enough?”
She snorted. “He’s been using a fake ID since he was sixteen.” That was Asher.
“Hmm.” Noah pursed his lips. “I think seeing you slap him was the best part of my day.”
She curled her fingers into her palm as if she could still feel the impact. She’d rarely argued with Asher, but she was done rolling over and letting him do and say whatever he wished.
“He thinks he’s in love with me.”
Noah looked sideways at her. “I take it by your reaction you aren’t in love with him?”
A sigh rattled from her chest. “I… I used to be.” She’d hurt the one friend who’d always been there, the one she thought would be by her side forever. “I hurt him.”
“Seems like he deserved it.”
“He did. And yet…”
He nodded as if he understood what she meant. “And yet.”
Lola hadn’t asked Noah where they were walking, but he stopped in front of a tall building with glass spanning the front. A doorman stood ready to let them in.
“Mr. Clarke.” The doorman nodded in greeting.
Noah stepped forward before looking back. “You coming?”
Lola couldn’t shake the foreboding feeling. “Noah, where are we?”
“Somewhere safe. Come on.”
She let his evasion go as she followed him past the smiling doorman. A woman looked up from a desk, but she didn’t stop them as Noah stepped up to the gold-faced elevators. Once inside, he hit the button for the top floor.
“This is Drew’s building, isn’t it?” Lola ran a hand through her hair and blew out a breath.
Noah shot her a guilty smile. Yes, guilty. Because he’d deliberately taken her to the one place she wouldn’t want to go. The one person. Her mind continued reeling from Asher’s words, and she couldn’t deal with Drew right now.
But Asher’s words continued on a loop through her mind. You think Drew actually sees you?
It was the same question she’d asked herself.
Yet, she didn’t turn back. Instead, she followed Noah into a wide open penthouse. Windows looked out on the city, illuminated by what seemed like a million tiny lights.
Most of the place was dark, but light filtered out beneath one of the bedroom doors.
Noah went straight for the kitchen and pulled two bottles of water out of the fridge, throwing one to her.
She caught it and busied herself drinking as her eyes took in the fancy penthouse.
“I have to text Dax really quick and tell him I left.”
“Dax?” Her eyes widened. The third man hadn’t been some random man named Nelson. It was Dax Nelson, one of the most prodigious musicians in the world, a man as mysterious as he was talented.
Noah cursed. “It seems, Lola, you weasel all the Rockstars Anonymous secrets out of me.”
“Rockstars Anonymous?”
He cursed again. “I’m just going to shut up now.”
“That would be a nice change.” Drew’s voice rolled through the room like a tidal wave, threatening to take her under the surface.
The water bottle crinkled as her hand tightened around it. Drew’s gaze didn’t leave her face. His eyes, so different from his brother’s, held an intensity in their blue depths.
“Well…” Noah looked between them. “Seems I’ve been so much of a nuisance today I may as well go do the unthinkable. I’m off to wake the preggers woman to run through our new song one final time. Check on me later to make sure I’m not dead.” He whistled as he walked toward one of the bedrooms.
Neither Drew nor Lola spoke until they heard the door shut.
Lola didn’t know what she’d expected when she faced him again. The last time she’d seen Drew, she kicked him out of her room so she could talk to Asher. And the time before… she brought a finger to her lips, wondering if it was possible to still feel his warmth.
He stepped toward her before stopping and looking away. “What…” He cleared his throat. “What are you doing here?”
“I was out with Brooke and…” She closed her eyes. “And Asher.”
“Noah told me he was in town.”
Lola nodded. “He came because of the article about us.”
Drew rubbed the back of his neck. “He flew all the way here from Florida for that?”
“To check on me.”
“Ah, I see.”
“You said you wanted to talk.” She pulled herself up onto a stool. “So, talk.”
He leaned against the counter and tucked his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I… I wanted to apologize to you.”
“Apologize?”
“I took advantage of you.”
None of his words made any sense. “How on earth did you take advantage of me?”
“I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
“Oh, this is that conversation. The one where you act like I don’t have a will of my own. In case you forgot, I showed up at your room that night. And at the ball… I wanted you to kiss me more than anything.”
“Lola.” He sighed.
“No, you listen to me, Drew Stone, you don’t get to decide how I feel about what happened. In case you didn’t realize it, I wanted this. I wanted you.” She slid from the stool and crossed the kitchen to stand in front of him. “I know you have rules, Drew. I know you’re fighting this with everything you have, but I don’t want to fight it. I just want to feel it.”
Pain flashed across his face, and she knew she wouldn’t like his next words. “But you’re Asher’s. You always have been. I just didn’t believe it before.”
First, Asher’s anger. Now, this. Lola backed away from the second Stone brother to hurt her in the span of an hour. “I’m Asher’s? Right. The same Asher who just told me he loved me to keep me from you.” She’d never been surer of anything. Asher wanted to take something from his brother, and he’d been so sure he had that power.
“Lola.” He said her name like a plea.
“I’m done letting the Stone brothers twist me up in knots.” She said the words more for herself than him. “I’m done.” She turned away from him, and he didn’t chase after her as she walked from his penthouse. He didn’t come as she hurried through the building and out onto the busy New York street.
As she hailed a cab and climbed in, she realized she hadn’t expected him to.
She’d spent most of her life wishing for someone she couldn’t have. But only now did it threaten to break her open.
Drew’s kisses still burned in her mind.
His smile had etched itself into her soul.
And his pain… well, that thrummed through her until she couldn’t feel anything else.
31
Drew
After a while, concerts had just become a part of the job for Drew. In the early years of his career, he’d felt lucky to stand on any stage, to hear a crowd chant his name. Back then, he’d have been happy if ten people—who weren’t his mom—showed up.
Back then, he’d loved it.
He didn’t know when he’d lost that. When rock tours became normal for him, less exciting. That wasn’t to say he didn’t appreciate each and every one of his fans. He did.
But he’d performed the same dance steps a thousand times, let the same words flow past his lips so often they were ingrained into his psyche. He never had to think of what came next.
Until Lola took her place beside him.
With Leah, everything was easy, calm. She was Drew’s best friend, his partner, but everything was for show. Their passion, their love story. None of it was real, just another act he hid behind.
There was no hiding when he danced with Lola. Suddenly, the steps became new, more intense, the concerts more meaningful.
And he wasn’t sure how he felt about that.
He sat in his dressing room alone, staring down at his phone and wondering if he should text Lola, if they should clear the air before taking the stage together. When it buzzed in his hand, for a moment, he thought it was her.
But that was wishful thinking.
“Hey, Leah.” He smiled, thinking of how good it was to hear from her.
“That doesn’t sound like pre-concert Drew.” Leah’s voice held a note of worry.
“What do you mean? I only said two words to you.”
“Yeah, and they sounded a little pathetic. ‘Hey, Leah.’” She tried to imitate him with a sigh. “Normally, you’re calm, almost emotionless before a concert. I used to think you were a robot.”
That made him laugh. “You’re ridiculous.”
“And you’re pathetic.”
“You already said that.”
“Well, it needed repeating. Why aren’t you out calming the dancers’ nerves or telling everyone they are going to do a great job? Don’t tell me you’ve stopped being that annoying optimistic guy in my absence.”
“I miss you.”
“Well, duh. But missing me isn’t the reason you sound like such a sad sack. Is Mel still there? She can knock some sense into you.”
“No, she had to take an early flight back to L.A. Something about us not being her only clients.”
A knock sounded on his door before Piper’s voice came through. “Drew, you better be dressed because I’m coming in.” She pushed open the door and shielded her eyes as she stumbled in.
“I have clothes on, Pipes.” He shook his head with a laugh.
“Ooh, put me on speaker, I want to talk to her.” Leah and Piper had gotten along since Piper first joined the tour. It had been a little weird how easily Piper fit in with everyone so quickly.
Drew hit speaker and set the phone on the counter while he leaned forward to fiddle with his hair.
“Piper!” Leah practically screamed.
Piper perched on the arm of the couch behind Drew. “Hey, Leah. We miss you around here.”
“Yeah yeah, just tell me. What’s wrong with Drew?”
“Hey!” Drew swiveled in his chair to shoot Piper a look.
She ignored him. “Many, many things.”
“We know that. But why does he sound so down? Please tell me it’s about a girl. Drew never has girl troubles.”
Piper pursed her lips and met Drew’s gaze. They sat in a silent staring contest before Piper launched from the couch and stole the phone before Drew could hang up on Leah. She turned away from him. “It’s definitely about a girl. Lola, the dancer who replaced you. He loves her, and he’s too dumb to tell her.”
Drew tackled her to the couch and stole the phone back. “I don’t love her.”
Piper kneed him in the ribs. “You are such a guy. I didn’t say you want to marry her—yet—but is it really so wrong to admit the great Drew Stone has feelings for someone?”
“No!” They’d both almost forgotten Leah was there until she yelled the single word. “It’s not wrong, but Drew is too stuck in his rules to do anything about it. Piper, tell me about this girl.”
Piper reached for the phone as she pushed him off her and struggled to sit up, but Drew pulled it in closer to his chest.
The words left him before he could call them back. “She’s strong. Probably as strong as you, Leah.” He sat back against the cushions and pushed a hand through his hair. “And beautiful, so beautiful. When she’s angry, she shouts in Spanish.” Though, he’d only seen her do it once. He’d never forget how she looked when he’d caught her dancing that first time. He wasn’t finished. “She’s kind.” He thought of how graciously she’d dealt with the other dancers who hadn’t accepted her at first. He closed his eyes. “And when she dances…” When she danced, he couldn’t take his eyes from her.
Piper was grinning at him, a smile he didn’t understand.
Leah stayed silent for a long time. “When she dances, what, Drew? What happens when she dances?”
He closed his eyes, and a groan rattled from his throat. “When she dances, that’s when I know I love her.”
Leah’s voice was quiet, almost a whisper when she spoke. “You can’t only love her when she dances, Drew. It has to be all the time. Every day.”
He pictured Lola lying in bed beside him after playing cards, the way she laughed each time she lost. How she’d looked standing in his apartment telling him she didn’t belong to anyone, that she got to make her own choices.
“Piper.” He could practically hear the grin in Leah’s voice. “Is our little Drew realizing he’s in love right now?”
Piper studied his face, meeting his eyes with a soft smile. “Yeah, I think he is.”
Drew shook his head, reality crashing in on him. “I lost her. You guys don’t understand. Lola hates me now.”
“Impossible.” Leah sounded so sure of herself. “You, Drew Stone, are unhateable. You just have to prove it to her.”
The dressing room door opened again, and Ben popped his head in. “Hey, I’m headed out to meet Dax in the box we reserved, but some dude with a headset told me to let you know you’re on soon.”
“I’ll take that as my cue,” Leah said. “Have a good show, Drew.”
Drew stood and let Piper fix his hair. Ben left, but there was no more time for Drew and Piper to talk. They left the dressing room behind. Music surrounded them as the opener finished up his set for the crowd at Madison Square Garden.
This was home for Drew. This place, this city. He loved every inch of it. It was different from Gulf City, louder and fast paced. He needed both parts of him, the exciting and the calm, in order to make this life work.
He greeted his dancers as he joined them near the side of the stage. He’d done basic stretching, but not as much as normal and his legs felt tight. There was too much on his mind to focus.
The moment he saw her, the breath left his lungs. Lola’s dark hair hung down her bare back in ringlets and the black outfit she wore was skintight, leaving parts of her shoulders and back exposed. He wanted to reach out to her, to feel her skin beneath his fingertips.
She lifted her eyes to meet his, a q
uiet defiance in her gaze. Drew fought for Lola to join his tour, to become his partner, but he’d never considered everything she’d given up, everything the spotlight put her through.
From tabloid rumors to cruel dancers and everything in between.
Yet, she was here. She hadn’t given up. On the tour, on dancing. On him.
And that was everything.
Drew heard his name as his dancers ran out onto the stage. He extended one hand to Lola, willing her to take it, to be his partner once more.
Her eyes held more questions than answers, but she didn’t shy away. When her palm hit his, he closed his fingers, squeezing her hand. In this moment, nothing mattered but the dancing.
They’d put their feelings aside, their argument from the night before. There were no brothers standing between them, no rules.
They walked onto the stage, taking up their places among the shadows as the crowd chanted his name.
He flipped on his mic as a single spotlight found him, but he still hadn’t released Lola’s hand. “Hello, New York!”
The crowd roared.
Leah’s words came back to him. You just have to prove it to her.
But how?
He stood facing thousands of people who wanted to hear him sing, and all he could focus on was the feel of her hand in his. He needed to move. He nodded to his band leader to start the music and wrapped an arm around Lola’s waist to begin their slow steps.
His voice came out hoarse, but he pushed through it to keep going as the song picked up.
“Dance with me,” he sang. “And we’ll always be walking on rainbows, soaring across the skies.”
He focused on the feel of Lola’s skin as he ran his hands up her back, the way her step faltered when he dragged her close, melding their bodies together. It was a love story told for the fans, a show for them to swoon over.
But for Drew, it was so much more.
Each dance step amplified the feelings inside his chest. You can’t only love her when she dances, Drew. It has to be all the time. Every day.
Love is a Dance Step (Rockstars Anonymous) Page 23
