"Well."
"Well what?"
"Are you going to tell me how long you've been working for Grier?"
The silent communication between Swann and Grier had spoken volumes. It hurt to think Van was involved in anything that might have gotten her mother killed. Suddenly, she felt very tired. After squeezing the bridge of her nose to stave off a headache, Cade sat back and waited. Normally, Cade had a very intimidating presence and that was what she was going for now, but she wasn't sure she carried it off. She wore one of her uniforms she'd left in Pandora's VIP quarters before the incident that left her stranded on Gothos Prime and it hung loosely on her frame. She clenched her fist as the silence built, aware of how large her knuckles looked with the weight loss.
"It's not what you think, Cade."
The soft tones strained her defenses. "How long?"
"About two months before I met you."
"Your mission?"
"To patrol the far edge of the sector and report any evidence of Gothoan forces massing for invasion."
Cade swallowed, feeling the hurt harden into a ball in the pit of her stomach. "So, Coalition Intelligence already knew there was trouble and they didn't say anything. Now, Queen Dorma is dead and Alara fired upon. We stand at the brink of war and still the intelligence corps withholds information."
She stood up so fast that the chair would have toppled over if it hadn't banged into the wall. Striding toward the portholes, Cade stood staring out into space with her chest heaving. Adrenaline sang in her veins, causing her heart to pound.
"I didn't know. I swear." There was no apology in Van's voice. "I'm a junior captain who was given a set of orders and my first command."
The anger still burned strong, but not toward Van. It never had been. Soldiers followed orders or resigned their commissions. Considering all she'd done, all she'd gone through to save Cade, Van would have told her if she thought her actions would culminate in this chaos.
"I believe you."
Cade's body was as tight as a bowstring. She wanted to lash out at the injustice of having her mother taken so cruelly. Wanted to haul Mentis in front of a tribunal, but even that was denied to her. Cade held everything in, convinced she could handle it, but she knew that soon she would have to take time to process all that happened in the last few weeks.
Van's arms slid around her waist from behind and her head rested on Cade's back. The sweetness from her touch seared Cade, driving her toward the edge of her control. More emotions pounded at the doors of her restraint and she felt like she would snap.
"I need to be alone right now."
Van tensed. She released Cade without a word and strode from the room. Cade heard the thud of her footsteps. She regretted hurting her, but she just couldn't handle anything else. Taking a steadying breath, Cade settled down at Van's desk and pulled up her computer terminal. It belatedly occurred to her that she'd just kicked the ship's commanding officer out of her own office. That fact paled in importance as she focused on what was now required. Not only had she lost her queen and her mother, but also one of her greatest supporters. The loss was like an open wound, much more painful than the one she'd suffered on Gothos.
Shame hammered her as Cade acknowledged that she regretted what all of this meant for her personally. All she had ever wanted was to serve the Coalition military and protect her people. With Dorma in such excellent health, she had thought her mother would rule for decades to come. Suddenly, everything was different. Her mother was dead and although there wasn't any proof, Cade didn't believe she had died in a freak accident or thrown herself from the cliffs in a fit of despair.
Drafting her resignation to Coalition Headquarters was the easiest part of what came next. When she reached Alara, the hard part would begin. That would require approval from the queen's advisors, now her own. She roughed out the document, read it and then started over from scratch. She wrote and revised the file that would spell the end of her career three times before she was satisfied, her stomach churning. When she finished, Cade saved the file to a chip and slipped it into her pocket. This wasn't the kind of thing you sent off to Coalition Command over a communications channel. She needed to deliver the missive in person.
With the distasteful task complete, Cade walked over to the full-length windows again. Staring out into space as stars streaked by always helped settle her emotions. Acknowledging the vastness of the universe put things into perspective. By the time Van informed her Pandora was preparing to dock, Cade felt centered. Fate had decided her course of action and she would be strong enough to see it through. Resistance to the inevitable was pointless. Squaring her shoulders, Cade walked out of the captain's office, determined to prove herself a ruler that would have made her mother proud.
"Extend docking clamps," Van ordered as the ship neared the spaceport. She kept her eyes on the forward viewer. Her voice was confident, but Cade detected her hesitation toward the replacement navigator.
Cade hadn't met the young man at the helm before and briefly wondered from what section of the ship Van had pulled him, not that it mattered. This voyage was at an end and in a few more minutes she would return to Alara. It hit her all at once that the nightmare was truly at an end. She was home. The thought caused her eyes to burn and she self-consciously blinked the moisture away. Cade refused to show any sign of weakness. Her people needed to see her as strong, a leader never unsure, and ready to face any danger to protect them.
The ship docked and systems began to power down. For the next half hour, Pandora's crew would ensure the vessel went into station-keeping mode. They didn't need Van for that.
"Captain Swann, you're with me." Cade kept her voice neutral, completely professional in front of the crew.
"Aye, Admiral."
A crew member had opened the main hatch before they arrived and snapped to attention on sight. Cade nodded to him as they passed. The familiar sights and smells of the space station hit her and Cade felt herself truly relax for the first time in what felt like forever.
"Things are going to get a little crazy for the next little while, Van. I'd really like it if you'd stay with me for the next few hours."
"Of course. I know it sounds silly, but I really don't want to let you out of my sight."
The comment contained layers of meaning that Cade latched onto immediately. Van had made similar statements over the course of the last few days. Cade was starting to think Van cared for her deeply. The possibility was a little disarming, but she hoped it was true. It would make things a little easier later. She looked at Van and smiled, resisting the urge to take her hand.
"What's first on the agenda?" Van asked.
Cade directed Van into the transport hub, abruptly aware of all the people staring at her. Some people looked a little shocked. Others smiled unabashedly. The crowd in the busy terminal slowly became aware that she was there and came to a standstill. When the clapping started, Cade couldn't have been more touched. This time, she didn't attempt to stop the tears.
Amidst the din, Van clapped a hand on her shoulder. "Come on. Let's get you home."
Cade shook hands and shared a few words with well-wishers as they were ushered to the front of the line. Transport sparkles filled her eyes and when they vanished, she discovered another surprise. A contingent of Fleet Marines stood surrounding the retrieval pad in full military dress. Commodore Martin Quaid, the base commander, stood front and center of the squad. Five steps from the platform, Cade discovered Fleet Admiral Alimi, Commander of the Coalition Military Forces. Her cousin, Saral Barab stood next to him, her smile so broad Cade thought it might be painful.
"Present arms," Quaid ordered loudly.
Quaid and the contingent of Marines saluted in unison. Admiral Alimi smiled broadly and stepped toward Cade. "Welcome back, Admiral Meryan. You had a lot of people very worried."
"Thank you, sir."
She started to salute her commanding officer, but he caught her off guard by wrapping her in a bear hug. Alimi w
as three inches shorter than Cade and had fifty kilos on her, but his embrace was strangely comforting. She had known him for years and had a lot of respect for him, but they had never really been close. He released her and she didn't have time to think about his actions.
"It's about time you got here." Saral took Cade into her arms, squeezing so hard it was difficult to draw breath. "I see your captain rescued your butt again. Is there something going on between you two that you haven't told me about?"
Fortunately, Saral had whispered the last part into her ear. "Wouldn't you like to know," she teased in return, low enough that the others wouldn't hear.
Cade pulled away and looked at the military personnel, realizing they still maintained the salute. "As you were."
Quaid terminated his salute, performed an about face and ordered, "Ready, too." The squad snapped to attention.
"I don't know what to say about all this. Thank you, sir."
"This is nothing," Alimi assured her. "We're going to have a parade in your honor later."
Cade froze, absolutely horrified at the idea of being venerated in such a way. She believed that only politicians and self-important blowhards truly appreciate a parade to show the people's admiration. Yet, what could she say?
Before she could force a polite response, Saral laughed. "The admiral is teasing you, Cade. Some of the base officials wanted to organize the parade, but we knew you'd hate it."
"Oh, thank goodness." Her relief was very real.
Alimi reached out and took her hand. "I want you to know that your people are deeply sorry for your loss, Cade, but we are so happy to have you back. If there is anything you need, please contact my office."
"Thank you, Admiral. I believe I may have to take you up on that offer soon."
She saw the frown on Van's face, but her comment didn't faze Alimi. "I was afraid of that, but I understand completely. The best interests of the people have to come first."
"Precisely."
Admiral Alimi turned to Van and shook her hand. "You've done the Coalition proud, Captain. Bringing the princess home has made you a national hero."
"That's not why I went after her, sir."
"I'm aware of that. It's that fact that makes what you did all the more impressive. Considering all the ramifications, what do you say that we forget all about you disobeying orders, hmm?"
Van grinned in obvious relief. "I'd really appreciate that, Admiral."
"Good." Alimi took a step back and looked at Quaid. "Commodore, why don't you release your people. I'm sure we all have work to do."
"Aye, aye, sir."
Commodore Quaid dismissed his troops as soon as the admiral walked away. As they dispersed, Cade started walking toward her home with Van and Saral next to her. Saral chattered away, excited that Cade was back safe and sound, but Cade barely heard her. She was listening to the birds sing and absorbing the scent of growing things. Warm sunshine caressed her skin, a welcome respite from the searing Gothoan cold.
"Cade? Are you all right?"
She looked at Van, seeing her worried expression. "I'm fine. I just have a lot on my mind."
Saral wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "I can't even imagine what you've been through. If Mentis wasn't already dead, I'd kill him myself."
Her cousin's infamous temper had made an appearance in less than five minutes of being on the ground. Normally, Saral's quick emotional outbursts irritated her, but in this instance she couldn't find fault. She felt the same way.
"Are the advisors in the conference room?"
"Yes, just like you wanted. Cade, you don't have to meet with them right now. Why don't you take some time, go visit your mother's tomb? No one will think any less of you if you ease back into things slowly."
"I will." The casual mention of her mother's grave cut deeply. Cade's jaw clenched. "Please have Jefferson ready with the ground car. I'll need him in about an hour."
Nonplussed by her tone, Saral stopped at the entrance to the castle. Cade continued on, grateful that Van stayed by her side. They crossed the circular foyer, headed for the conference room. A palace guard snapped to attention upon their approach. Cade stopped and turned to Van, drawing strength from her presence.
"Do you mind waiting? I'll try to make it quick."
The tenderness in Van's eyes shored her up. "Whatever you need. Take your time and I'll grab us a snack from the kitchen."
"Make mine a coffee and a sandwich."
"Something you can carry with you?"
Cade wanted to hug Van, but settled for a smile. "You know me so well."
"Not yet," Van said softly, "but I intend to."
Cade's heart thumped against her ribcage and she barely managed not to gasp. Rather than respond, she moved toward the conference room and the guard broke his stance to open the door. She knew that once she entered, he would adjust his position to guard the room for any unauthorized entry.
Four individuals stood facing her. One man and three women. All of them had been with her mother for years and each wore conflicting expressions of equal parts sorrow and relief. They had been standing near the double doors next to the garden talking quietly. As one, they turned at the sound of the main entrance opening and walked over to meet her. A much older Alaran woman was the first to reach Cade and took both her hands. Pisa Rhydone's faded blue eyes held compassion.
"My dear, our prayers to the Mother have been answered. We believed you lost to us."
The only man in the room was fully Human. Jonas Seaver didn't speak, but he smiled and Cade thought he might cry. She looked at the other two women, an Alaran named Mali and the final woman who had some Human ancestry, Grace Barton. Cade motioned for them to sit.
"Princess Cade," Grace said, "I know you've only just returned, but time is of the essence. Much has happened since you were last on Alara."
As the queen's chief diplomatic advisor, Grace maintained close contact with representatives from the system's other planets. Often, she could see difficulties coming to bear long before they actually materialized. In this case, Cade didn't need the insightful woman's expertise to know she had to act quickly.
"The system is in chaos without a seated ruler and with the recent unprovoked attacks, the people are understandably worried. That's why I intend to submit my resignation with the Coalition military leaders as soon as I leave here."
"Good." Jonas nodded soberly. "You also know that Dorma's successor must be crowned quickly."
"You mean me. I appreciate that all of you were with my mother for a long time, but I am going to need your counsel as much as she ever did. For that reason, I ask that you not stand on ceremony with me. If you have something I need to hear, just say it."
She could see that she surprised them with her directness.
"Very well." Mali Tahima had been the Alaran science advisor, but that didn't mean her knowledge was restricted to technological matters. "The coronation should take place within the week, the sooner the better."
"I agree. Please see to the arrangements."
Mali nodded and then glanced at her counterparts. Clearly, she wanted to say something else, but wasn't sure how. Cade's headache intensified and throbbed behind her left eye. "What? I have little patience for prevarication."
"Have you chosen a counterpart?" Grace met her eyes without flinching. Considering the sensitive nature of the question, she impressed Cade.
"Yes. I think I've also just chosen who my chief advisor will be."
Grace flinched in surprise and smiled. "May I ask who you've chosen?"
"Captain Vanessa Swann, although she doesn't know it yet."
Old Pisa chuckled. "I'd like to be an insect in the corner when that discussion occurs."
"Believe me, I'm not looking forward to it. There is no one I'd trust with Alara's safety more than Van, but I just can't predict her response. She could refuse."
Jonas frowned. "That would be disappointing. The people will accept the esteemed captain. She risked her life to save you a
nd has gathered quite a following among the populace."
"Who cares about that?" Mali scoffed. Being nearer to Cade's age, she had other concerns. "Do you care for this person, Princess?"
"Of course, why else would I ask her to be my counterpart?"
Shaking her head, Mali clarified. "No, I mean do you wish her to truly be your spouse?"
"Isn't that a little personal?" The hint of a growl in Cade's voice warned the woman to back off. It didn't work.
"Princess, I do not wish to offend, but we are your advisors now until or unless you decide to replace us. There can be no secrets if we are to properly fulfill our roles. I am not asking you because I seek fodder for the rumor mills. We must know if Captain Swann is to truly be your spouse or if this is merely a diplomatic solution."
Cade carefully considered Mali's declaration and knew she was right. These people would be her eyes and ears, the true intelligence gatherers behind the throne. If Cade intended to use Vanessa as a pawn, her councilors needed to know.
"Honestly, Van is someone I would choose to be my spouse. She doesn't know and I don't know how she would react if she did. I do think she'll agree to at least a temporary alliance. Alaran tradition declares I must have a counterpart within thirty cycles of the coronation. As much as I lo...care...for Van, the welfare of the people comes first. If she later decides to nullify our association, that's something I shall have to deal with."
"Then we shall accept her as a fully vested mate until the future proves otherwise," Pisa promised. Cade thought she detected a sentimental streak in the slightly hunched, older woman and hoped she wouldn't attempt to play matchmaker.
"Just don't treat her any differently until she says yes."
"When are you going to ask her?" Grace asked.
"Tonight. First, I must meet with the fleet admirals and then I'd like to pay my respects to the queen. I'll ask Van to join me for dinner tonight in the central gardens."
"A wonderful choice," Jonas approved. "The gardens are in full bloom. I'll ask the kitchen to make a special meal that your chosen mate will enjoy so much she won't be able to say no."
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