I cringe at the sound of my legal name. My parents are the only people that call me that. I was named after my grandmother; a woman I never even knew.
“Dad,” I smile, sitting down across from him.
“I’ve already ordered tuna sandwiches, so what’s this about then?” he asks, getting straight to the point.
“Obviously, I’ve lost my job. Unfortunately, I can’t find another. Is my going to college still on the table?” I ask, laying it all out there.
“So you didn’t know as much about the world as you thought you did? Tough out there without any formal education, isn’t it?” he asks smugly.
I want to roll my eyes, maybe call him an ass—but I don’t. I stay silent. I let him have his gloating. I’m the one begging here, he holds all the power over me, something he not-so-secretly loves.
“Okay, what do you want here, Henrietta? I’m not paying for an education for you if you don’t have a plan. This isn’t just some way to get me to pay your bills.”
I try not to growl. I try to stay calm. It’s difficult, but I try.
“You said you wanted me to get an education, go to college. I’m good at banking, I was thinking something in finance,” I say before I pick up my delivered sandwich.
“Finance?” he snorts. “You barely passed math. I’m not wasting my money on that. You’re going to have to do better,” he murmurs before taking a bite of his own food.
“My dream is pastry chef school,” I say just above a whisper.
“That’s even more useless than finance, Hattie,” he spouts.
I knew it was a mistake, but I had hoped my dad would be receptive to my wanting to go to school.
“I’ve got nothing, dad. I don’t know what to do. Nobody will hire me,” I whisper as tears well in my eyes.
“You should have thought about that before you decided to be a big badass and move out on your own, disregarding your mother’s and my advice. You also should have thought about that before you started hanging around with biker trash the way you were.
“All of this you’ve done to yourself. All of this is a great life lesson for you, and I refuse to bail you out. Your mother won’t either. Andy still has concern for you, of which you’re lucky. Perhaps he can help. Though, on a cops salary, I doubt it.”
“I dated Johnny for a few weeks, Dad. You’re going to condemn me for a man I dated for a couple of weeks?” I ask, not understanding him.
“I know Andy, Steve, and even that horrible Willa girl tried to counsel you on your decision, you refused to listen to them or follow their advice. This, unfortunately, is a pattern of yours. If I go ahead and give you what you want, you, my daughter, will never learn.”
I stand, abandoning the sandwich I should probably wrap up and take with me. Who knows when I’ll be able to buy another one. I don’t bother speaking to him. He’s made his decision. No matter what I say, he won’t budge. I know that much about my father.
I keep it together until the cool October breeze reaches my face, and then I cry.
One week, it seems to be my theme in life. I have one week before I’ll be homeless.
One week to figure out how to make money.
I’ve been one week without Johnny and I want him back.
I walk home, though not quickly. I’m too stressed, depressed, and just plain worried about my future.
What am I going to do?
Suddenly, the joke about me stripping isn’t such a laughing matter anymore.
My phone rings in my hand and my eyes are too blurry from tears to see who it is. I answer it, unknowing who is on the other end.
“Hello,” I whisper through my tears.
“Hattie?”
An involuntary sob escapes my throat at the sound of his voice. That voice, a voice I have been dreaming about is now on the other end of the phone. It’s quite possibly the worst timing, but I honestly don’t care. Not really—not ever.
“What’s wrong, Hattie?” he demands.
“Everything,” I whisper, unable to keep my dramatics to myself.
“You need me? I’ll be on my way,” he murmurs. For whatever insane reason, it makes me cry just a little bit harder.
“No, no just—just a b-b-bad day,” I blubber like a fool while I try to will myself to calm the hell down.
“Breathe, princess,” he whispers.
I take a deep breath in before I let it out, and by my second one I feel calmer. Not better, but calmer.
“I’m sorry,” I mutter as embarrassment washes over me.
“Tell me what’s wrong?” he gently asks.
“It’s nothing, Johnny. Why are you calling me?” I ask in confusion as I continue to walk closer to my apartment building.
“I just wanted to check in with you. I—after everything. I just wanted to make sure you were doing all right,” he murmurs.
I am surprised by his concern and his contact. I left him, after he made it more than clear that I wasn’t going anywhere.
Yet, there was just no way that I could stay—no way that I could live the life he wanted me to. It doesn’t matter how badly it hurts, to have only had a taste of him, and not be able to keep him.
“I’m fine, Johnny,” I murmur as I unlock my apartment door and step inside.
“Okay, Hattie—just, if you need anything or whatever, call me.”
Johnny hangs up and I stare at my phone in surprise. He doesn’t seem like the kind of man who would give a second thought to some girl he only knew a couple of weeks.
We’ve known of each other for three years, but it isn’t as if we truly know anything about one another.
I walk into my bedroom with the exciting plans of taking a nap then job searching until I find something that will pay my rent.
I turn the light on and open my mouth to scream at the sight before me—but a hot, smelly, dirty hand covers me before I can get a sound out.
Chapter Fourteen
DIRTY JOHNNY
“I’m fine, Johnny.”
Hattie is anything but fine.
With the news of the Bastards possibly lying in wait to fuck with us, I wanted to check on her, make sure she was okay. She sounded upset, crying, but not scared necessarily.
She’s probably crying about her lack of job, or maybe she broke a nail.
Fuck if I know.
I feel like a dick for even thinking that. What I should be doing is driving over to see her and make sure she’s okay. If I were a better man, I would.
I lean back in my chair and watch the room. The original charter is packing up to leave and go back to Cali, enjoying one last beer before they head out.
My brothers all have concerned looks on their faces. They’re thinking about their families, about the Bastards and The Cartel, about the uncertainty that is in the air.
I know that Hattie is safe. They wouldn’t fuck with her because they don’t even know she exists. There are much bigger women in our group that are much bigger parts of our circle.
Kentlee, for one, is not only Fury’s wife, but also MadDog’s daughter-in-law. She’s a target—a huge target. They’re not going to mess around with Hattie.
I take a swig of my beer and sit in silence. I’m glad when nobody bothers me. My head is occupied and not into the normal, nightly bullshit happenings that go on around here.
“You good?” Torch asks, sitting next to me and taking a pull from his own beer.
“Not at all,” I truthfully admit.
“You need to get your shit together,” he chuckles.
“This club’s getting into deep shit with the Bastards and The Cartel possibly honing in. I don’t want to put her in danger,” I say as my lame as excuse for being a pussy.
“She’d be safer in your bed rather than an hour away,” Torch points out.
Fucking right she would, but I fucked that up. Like I fuck everything up. A waste of cum, like my old man always said I was. I’m proving him right again and again.
I down the rest of my beer a
nd look around for something, or namely someone. When I see her, I lift my chin at Torch and leave him to his brooding. I walk across the room toward Tasha, who is sitting next to Harmony.
“Where’s your girl?” Harmony asks.
“Not my girl anymore,” I shrug, watching as her eyes brighten.
She puffs out her big tits a bit more and pouts her bottom lip slightly.
“Sorry to hear that, baby,” she murmurs.
The look in her eyes tells me she’s, in fact, not one fucking bit sorry. I don’t really care. I just need to lose myself, to forget about Hattie.
I don’t know how to do that.
Maybe fucking Harmony will help. Maybe fucking every woman I come across will help? Probably not, but I’m going to fucking try.
“Is Tasha joining us?” Harmony asks.
I look over to Tasha, who is biting on her bottom lip as her eyes dart from Harmony to me, over and over. Fuck it.
“Yeah. C’mon, babe,” I mutter.
I don’t really feel like putting forth as much effort as fucking two bitches takes, but maybe I’ll just let them do all the work tonight. I don’t want to think anymore. I don’t want to think about anything.
I just want to feel and I want to come.
Physical actions, that’s what I know, and that is all I want tonight. Life was better when all I did was fuck, fight, ride, and drink.
“On our knees?” Harmony asks as soon as we walk over the threshold of my bedroom.
I shake my head as I lock the door behind us, not wanting any disturbances tonight. I don’t feel up to anything.
“I want to see you two fuck each other,” I grunt as I start to take my clothes off.
“Can I suck you?” Harmony murmurs, licking her lips.
“Later,” I smirk.
Both Tasha and Harmony make a show of undressing while I sit in a chair across from my bed. I’m not going to fuck them on the floor tonight.
Though it feels wrong to fuck them in my bed, I want the memory of Hattie being there gone. I need to rid my space of her memory, or at least try.
I watch as Tasha kisses down Harmony’s neck to her big, fat tits, licking one of her nipples before she sucks it into her mouth.
My cock starts to harden at the sight of the two women kissing and touching each other.
When Tasha’s hand goes between Harmony’s legs and she starts to rub her clit, I groan. I wrap my hand around my dick and slowly start to stroke myself.
I lose myself in the moment, in the bodies of the two women in front of me. I fuck them both. We spend the night making each other come repeatedly to the point of exhaustion, and not once do I forget Hattie.
Not once do I not wish she were here instead of them, the both of us the only two in the room.
It’s when I’m completely exhausted, with both women passed out around me, that I know for certain Hattie is the one for me.
I can’t have her.
I can’t keep her.
I know that I will lose her and it’ll kill me.
At this point, I’ve only lost the idea of her; but to completely have her and lose her years from now, that is a pain I can’t imagine. So I’ll fuck these whores and all the while I’ll be thinking of my sweet Hattie.
I wake up with a racing heart a few hours later, and push both women off of me, informing them that it’s time to go.
They grumble but make no real protests as they gather their clothes and stumble out of my room. I open my nightstand drawer and find my cigarettes. I need a smoke.
Once the nicotine hits my system, I feel a bit calmer. I don’t know what startled me awake, but I feel like my heart is going to explode from my chest.
I grab my phone, deciding to play one of my games or scroll through Facebook, seeing if I can chill out and go back to sleep.
I unlock my phone and notice a notification for a missed call and new text message. It’s not uncommon for me to have missed calls and texts. Usually, from my mother, or one of the brothers in the club, but I can tell in my gut that something ain’t right.
I gave my mother money just the other day. No way would she ask again this soon. She would at least wait a week or two.
I open my texts and notice it’s from a private number. It’s a video, it was sent last night around eight. I was already elbow deep in pussy and didn’t hear it vibrate on the nightstand.
What I see on the screen makes my stomach lurch.
Hattie.
My Hattie.
She’s sitting on her bed in nothing but a sexy, little, black lace bra and black lace panties. I would think it’s hot as fuck, but the look of pure fear and panic on her face says that she did not set this up.
Then I watch as two men appear with black masks covering their faces. One grabs at Hattie’s tit and laughs when she tries to scoot away from him. He doesn’t let her. He wraps his hand in her hair and pulls her closer to him.
“See this bitch, Dirty Johnny? She’s going to be a whore for us if you don’t get your club to back the fuck off. We want the Russian contract. We want it all. Don’t think that this skinny cunt is where we’ll stop either, because it isn’t. First it’s her, then it’s Rosie, then it’s Brentlee, and we’ll save the best for last. Kentlee.
“One by one, your women will be our whores. Maybe we’ll even breed them, but most likely, we’ll sell them off to The Cartel. Do you know how much money they’ll give us for American white women? You have one day to get your club to back out of your contract with the Russians,” he grunts.
I see Hattie being yanked off of the bed by her hair and her scream fills my quiet room before the screen goes black.
I sit.
Unbelieving.
Completely shocked by what I’ve just seen. Then I send out a text for emergency church in ten minutes. I hurry, running to the shower.
I quickly change once I’ve rinsed off the smell of the two women who have just vacated my room. Before I can run down to the bar, my stomach lurches and I vomit in the nearest trashcan.
I was fucking two whores as Hattie was going through God knows what.
I’m a fucking piece of shit.
When I finally make it down to the bar, it’s swimming with brothers. Fury looks confused as fuck, and I’d laugh at him if I wasn’t so goddamn scared.
I don’t say a word or answer their questioning looks. Instead, I walk straight into the room where we hold church. I stand in the corner, near Fury’s chair, and I wait.
“What’s this all about?” Fury asks once everybody is settled in their seats.
“The Bastards have Hattie. They sent me a video last night. They want us to sever our contract with the Russian’s or they’ll be taking our women one-by-one and either using them as their whores or selling them to The Cartel,” I say with a shaky voice.
“Fucking hell, how did they even know who she was?” Sniper asks.
“MadDog said they’d been watching,” I grumble.
“Do they show their faces in the video?” Fury asks.
“No. They’re wearing masks, and I can’t tell by the voices. As far as I knew, all the Bastards were pretty much dead. I couldn’t even guess at where these guys even came from,” I murmur, pulling up my phone and starting the video before handing it to Fury.
I stand behind him, unable to watch the video in its entirety again. I know when his woman’s name is mentioned because his body goes rigid and he lets out a low, deep growl. Then he hands my phone back to me and takes a deep breath.
“They didn’t tell us how to get her back, except to sever the contract with the Ruskies. How would they know if we succeeded unless they have a mole planted?” Fury says, as if he’s thinking aloud.
“What if we just pretended and had Kirill tell his men that the contract has been severed?” Drifter suggests.
“The mole could be fucking anywhere. Could be here, Canadian club, the original charter, or in with the Russians. Fuck, I don’t know what to do, and we only have hours left. This
was sent last night and we’re already getting into late evening,” Fury mutters
“They’ll call back, then you find out where your girl is and how exactly they want proof of the canceled contracts,” Vault suggests.
“I don’t want anything to happen to her. She’s—she ain’t a whore. She’s Hattie, and she’s only nineteen,” I ramble.
I’m unable to think of anything but Hattie, finding her and getting her back. I’m never leaving her side again.
This aching in my chest can’t be ignored. I don’t care what I have to give up or change about myself, I’ll do whatever she wants. I just want her back and safe.
“We’ll get her back,” Fury mutters. I look up to see that everybody has left. It’s only the two of us in the room.
“I spent the night fucking Harmony and Tasha and this was sitting on my phone the entire time. What was happening to her while I was getting my dick wet, Fury?” I ask looking at him, pleading with him to assure me that nothing was happening to her, that she’s fucking perfectly fine.
“I don’t know, Johnny. But whatever it is, when we get her back, you need to help her with it. You want her, then you need to step the fuck up. It ain’t a game anymore. We don’t know what these guys are capable of, because we don’t know who they are,” he says.
“If they did something to her, if they hurt her, I won’t be able to help her, Fury. I don’t know how to feel sympathetic or sad. I only know anger,” I explain.
“You think I feel sympathy for anybody but Kentlee and my babies? You think I feel anything for anybody other than them? You’re my brothers and I love you, but if it comes down to it, my wife and my children will always come first. If Hattie is yours, if she’s the one you’re meant to have, you’ll be able to be what she needs you to be when she needs it.”
I watch as he stands, then his eyes cut back to me and he speaks once more.
“I’ll be in my office making plans for lockdown, come and get me when you get a new message from those fuckheads,” he grunts right before he walks away.
I sit down and stare at my phone, feeling fucking helpless and worthless. I try to keep from imagining the horrors that Hattie must be facing at this exact moment. I’ll kill them all, slowly.
Notorious Devils MC Complete Collection: BoxSet Page 69
