* * *
“What are you wearing?” Mallory answered her phone on the first ring.
“I’m trying to decide between shorts or a dress.” Actually, I was trying to talk myself out of wearing a dress. My brain had conjured at least ten smart, valid reasons as to why a dress was a bad idea.
“Go for the dress. It’s a date. You should always wear a dress on a date.”
Facing the mirror, I sandwiched the phone between my ear and my shoulder as I held the dress against my body. It was a periwinkle strappy dress with a single ruffle that hung off each shoulder. It hit mid- thigh and was just flowy enough to not be completely form-fitting.
“It’s not a date.” I laid the dress on my bed.
“A hot guy is taking you to dinner. Of course it’s a date.”
“He just felt guilty about selling me a car with a broken gas gauge.”
Growing up without my mother, I’d relied on my best friend, Carla, for help in the guy department. She’d go through my closet and toss outfits at me. She was also the makeup expert. Dad didn’t have the slightest clue how to apply eyeliner, and I certainly couldn’t ask him for dating advice.
I knew being without a mom would get harder as my problems got bigger. I glanced at my mother’s picture. I’d love to hear your thoughts about Mallory’s firework first-kiss theory.
“Trust me. It’s a date.”
I glanced at the clock on my nightstand. My stomach twisted in a nervous knot. “All right. Let me go. I have to finish getting ready.”
“Send me a selfie before you leave!”
“I will.”
Against my better judgment, I slipped into my dress. I hooked my small silver hoop earrings through my lobes, buckled my white sandals around my ankles, and spritzed myself with perfume.
At seven o’clock on the dot, my phone dinged with a text from Tanner. I snapped a quick selfie for Mallory and grabbed my purse as I made a beeline for the front door.
“Where are you headed?” Dad was on the couch watching television.
“Just going to dinner.”
He smiled. “You look very pretty for just dinner.”
“Thanks. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”
His face fell, and guilt stabbed me in the stomach. “Have fun. Be careful. Call me if you need me.”
Tanner
Charlotte stepped outside, and my heart stopped beating for a few seconds. Her strappy blue dress was just short enough, showing off her long, toned legs. The ends of her hair curled slightly, and I saw something shimmery on her eyelids. She didn’t need to do any of this—she was naturally beautiful—but the fact that she did told me she wanted to look good on our date tonight. For me.
I stood outside my Mustang holding a bright bouquet. I tried to steady my breath as she approached, my heart racing faster with every step she took.
“Wow. I would say you look beautiful, but that just doesn’t seem good enough.”
“I wasn’t sure what to wear. Is this okay for where we’re going?” She tugged on the hem of her dress.
I leaned over and placed a lingering kiss on her cheek. “It’s perfect. You look perfect.” I handed her the flowers. “I didn’t know what your favorite flower was, so I got an assortment.”
She smiled. “I love them. You didn’t have to.” She pointed to an orange flower in the middle of the bouquet. “And Gerbera daisies are my favorite.”
I swung the passenger door open for her. “Good to know.” I’d remember that for next time.
I took Charlotte to my favorite Spanish restaurant on the other side of the island. I had fond memories coming here with my family when my father was well. We were seated at a small corner booth in the back of the dimly lit room. It was private and secluded with an intimate vibe. I tried to focus on the menu, but found it difficult to concentrate with Charlotte’s bare leg pressed against mine in the booth.
From the corner of my eye, I caught her stealing a glance at me every so often. What was she thinking? I was almost too afraid to ask.
“What’s going on behind those pretty blues?”
“Just wondering what I should order.” Liar. “What do you get when you come here?”
“I usually come with my family. We get a bunch of different dishes, and we share them. The enchiladas are my favorite.”
“Can we do that? Order a few things, and share them?”
“We can do whatever your heart desires, sweet girl.” I winked as I closed the menu.
The waitress sauntered over to our table. “Are you ready to order?”
“We are.”
Charlotte continued to watch me as I rattled off several appetizers and entrees. I’d pay good money to hear her thoughts.
“I’ll put your order in right away. Oh, and I just have to tell you: you two make such a gorgeous couple.”
I couldn’t help but grin. I wrapped my arm around Charlotte’s shoulders. “Thank you very much.”
Charlotte nudged me with her elbow once the waitress left.
I took my arm back and chuckled. “What? She’s right. We look great together.”
“I just hope she gets our order right. I don’t think she heard a word you said. She was too busy drooling on her notepad.”
“I don’t care what she brings out, as long as I’m sitting here next to you.”
“Do you always have the right words to say?”
“No. My family would tell you differently.”
“Why is that?”
“My brother and I are like night and day. Chase was always good at everything. Good in school, good at sports, he’s a good singer … He’s the good son. I always got into trouble, and my dad would compare me to him. He didn’t mean to, but he did. We don’t really see eye- to- eye on a lot of things. I always wanted to go away to college and have something that was my own. Something that I could be good at.”
“So why didn’t you?”
“Dad got sick, and the hope of me going to college went out the window. We couldn’t afford it with all the hospital bills, and they needed my help at the shop. They had already given Chase a chunk of their savings to go to California.” I shrugged. “I never got the chance to make Dad proud of me the way Chase did.”
“Nobody says you have to be like your brother, and you shouldn’t try to be. I don’t know Chase, and I’m sure he’s great, but you’re great, too.” Charlotte covered my hand with hers.
That one small gesture, a touch of affection, was more than anyone had shown me. My heart swelled. I turned my hand over and laced our fingers together. “You’re pretty much the only person who thinks so.”
“The waitress also thinks you’re great.”
I laughed. “Well, if you like me, then I must be doing something right.”
“I do.” It was almost a whisper, as if she was afraid to admit it.
What is she so afraid of? “I like you, too, Charlotte.”
She looked down at our hands. “You didn’t really want to be just friends, did you?”
I smirked, leaning toward her. “Just about as much as you wanted to be mine.”
Her cheeks turned pink, but she didn’t deny it. She was smiling, too.
Charlotte
The contented smile sprawled across Tanner’s face as he drove me home made his shadowy eyes twinkle. From his long black lashes to his full lips, he was so handsome it made my heart ache—and the boy was charming. He exuded charisma with every word he spoke. Our waitress seemed to be entranced while taking our order, and I had to suppress a giggle. I understood. I didn’t know it was possible to sound that sexy ordering food.
More than just looks, though, he had the heart of a lion. He was an incredibly selfless and caring human being. Only, he had no idea. He sacrificed so much for his family, yet he never felt good enough. I wanted to make him feel good enough. I wanted him to see what I saw.
Opening doors and bringing me flowers were romantic gestures that had taken me by surprise. This Tanner was a far cry from
the violent version I’d caught a glimpse of. Yet, I knew it was still inside him. Tonight, I realized that he was not one or the other—he was both Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
We arrived at my apartment, and Tanner insisted on walking me to the front door of my building.
I turned to face him. “You’re sweet. You didn’t have to get out. We could’ve just said goodbye in the car.”
“A gentleman always walks his lady to her door. Besides”—he smiled and touched his hand to my cheek—“if I didn’t walk you here then I couldn’t give you a proper good-night kiss.”
All I could hear was the blood pulsing in my ears. I’d known this moment was coming, and I was foolish to let it get to this point. I wasn’t supposed to get too close to anyone. Kissing him would make everything that much harder. I knew I shouldn’t. But I want to. My entire body ached with want for Tanner. No matter how hard I fought it, something kept pulling me toward him.
Tanner leaned in and I was frozen where I stood, stuck inside my head. He kissed me with the softest lips. It was gentle and sweet, exactly how he’d been with me the entire night. He pulled back, and he took my breath with him.
“This is the part where you say good night and walk inside,” Tanner whispered, our faces inches apart.
I should listen to him. But my lips were tingling, and I wanted more. I looked into his eyes and swallowed hard. “Kiss me again.”
Tanner pulled me against his body and his lips crashed into mine. I dropped my purse and the flowers onto the concrete, stretching onto my toes as I gripped the back of his neck. His tongue rushed inside my mouth, and I felt it throughout my entire body. His hands were lost in my hair as our tongues swirled together in perfect unison.
His passion, this incredible sense of urgency, radiated off him and it poured over me. He kissed me as if my kiss was all he needed to survive. I’d never been kissed like that before. All the cliché descriptions of a spectacular first kiss became my reality: dizzy, heart racing, weak in the knees, and definitely fireworks—the entire grand finale of the Macy’s Fourth of July display.
We lost track of time, lost in each other. I jumped when I heard my neighbor’s yappy dog on her nightly walk a few feet from us.
“Damn dog,” Tanner muttered, grinning and breathless.
I giggled. “You should hear her in the morning.” I took a step backwards and kicked my purse onto its side. I knelt down, but froze. Oh my God. No!
“Is that …?” Tanner bent over to get a closer look. “Is that what I think it is?”
My gun was on the ground amidst the spilled contents of my bag. I quickly shoved it back inside along with everything else and stood up. “It’s nothing.”
“That’s not nothing. That’s a gun.”
“Everyone has a gun down south.” I laughed nervously. I knew he could tell I was lying, but I didn’t know what else to say.
His eyes narrowed. “Are you in trouble?”
“No. Really. It’s just for protection.”
“Who do you need protection from?”
I took a shaky breath before answering. I needed to get my story straight so it sounded believable. I did need it for protection; it wasn’t a lie. “I come from a small town. I was scared to move to a city like Staten Island. My best friend, Carla, suggested I get a gun.” I tried to appear nonchalant as I shrugged. “It’s for protection.”
The way Tanner looked at me, I could tell he wasn’t buying it. “Do you know how to use that thing?”
“Just point and shoot, right?” Why wasn’t he pressing this further?
He blew out a puff of air and his lips slowly spread into a grin. “You can’t give a guy the best kiss of his life and then pull a gun on him.”
“Maybe that will keep you in line.”
Tanner leaned in, caressing my face. “With a kiss like that, I am putty in your hands.” He covered my lips with his, kissing me one last time. “Good night, my sweet girl.”
“Good night, Tanner.” A shiver ran through me, my entire body covered in goose bumps. “Thank you for tonight.”
I took my wobbly legs upstairs and tiptoed quietly into my apartment. Dad had fallen asleep watching TV as he did most nights. He stirred when I locked the door behind me.
“Sorry, Dad. Didn’t mean to wake you.”
He smiled, rubbing the sleepiness from his eyes. “It’s okay. I want to hear how your night was.”
I sat on the couch armrest. “It was great.”
“You went on a date, didn’t you?”
“I did.”
“Who’s the lucky guy?”
Tanner’s kiss had weakened my defenses. My guard was down, and my heart was exposed. “His name is Tanner. His family owns the auto body shop where I bought my car.”
“Ah, so that’s where you met him.”
I nodded. “I’m really tired. I’m going to call it a night.”
Dad reached out and gave my arm a squeeze.
Once in my bed, I replayed each second from the night as I stared at the flowers on my dresser. Was Tanner in bed doing the same? As the tingling throughout my body faded away, the guards at the gates of my heart began pulling the drawbridge closed.
Losing a parent at a young age, you learn not to get too close to people. If your own mother could be taken from you, no one was secure in your life. For months, my parents had told me: “Everything is going to be okay.” They lied to protect me from the heartbreaking truth. I was only five years old when my mother died, and I couldn’t make sense of it. Why did they lie? Why didn’t they tell me what was going to happen so I could prepare for it?
The older I grew, I learned it was easier to keep people at arm’s length. If I didn’t let people in, they couldn’t hurt me. If I didn’t trust people, I couldn’t fall prey to their lies. The only person I’d let get close to me in eighteen years had been Carla. How I wanted to call her right now. She’d have the perfect thing to say to ease my worries. I wanted to share my new life with her.
But what would she say about what I’d done to get this new life?
Moreover, what would Tanner think? He thought he liked me, but he didn’t know the real me. He liked the version of me I was portraying. The truth slapped me in the face: I had trust issues, yet I was the one who couldn’t be trusted.
Eight
Tanner
The bell on the door sounded, and Charlotte snatched her phone out of Mallory’s hands when she saw me walk in. I knew she was showing her my text from this morning. That made me happy to see. She’d never admit it.
“Hi, Tanner,” Mallory said in a singsong voice.
“Hi, Mal,” I sang back. I curled my finger signaling for Charlotte to come to me.
She glanced at the kitchen door as she scurried around the counter. I wrapped my arms around her and spun in a circle before setting her down. I pressed my lips against hers, and an electric shock zapped through me the way it had last night. I wanted to lay her on the counter and make love to every inch of her body. Mallory could watch. I didn’t care.
“Did you come for your coffee and doughnut?”
“I came for your lips. But, I suppose I’ll take a doughnut for Squirt, too.”
Mallory leaned her elbows on the counter while Charlotte sauntered away to put my doughnut in a bag. “So, when are you asking Charlotte out again?”
“Mal!” Charlotte shouted.
I chuckled. “I was actually going to ask if she wanted to go out tonight.”
“Tonight?” Mallory asked. “That’s so soon.”
Charlotte dug her elbow into her friend’s back as she walked around her to hand me the doughnut. “I’m free tonight.”
“Pick you up at seven?”
“Sure.”
I leaned over and pointed to my mouth. “Give me one more to hold me over until then.”
Her cheeks heated. Still, she didn’t pass on the opportunity to kiss me again.
My heart was a jackhammer in my chest until I was back inside my car. I was f
alling for this girl. Hard. She had me in the palm of her hand, and she didn’t even know it. With Charlotte by my side, I felt like I could face anything. She made me want to be better. She made me feel better. Calmer. Safer. I only wished I could do the same for her.
She kept me at a distance. Close enough to touch her, but not close enough to touch her soul. I couldn’t stop thinking about the secrets surrounding her. She refused to tell me why she had to leave Florida; she refused to tell me why she was carrying a gun; she refused to tell me who she felt she needed protection from.
Charlotte was guarded. Someone had hurt her, and she was scared of getting hurt again. I had to prove myself to her. I had to prove that she could trust me.
Charlotte
Tanner refused to tell me where we were going. All he said was to dress casual. I brushed my hair and spritzed perfume as I surveyed myself in the mirror for the last time—jeans and a pale-yellow shirt. I jumped when his text came in at seven. I swung my purse over my shoulder as I made my way downstairs.
To my surprise, Tanner was holding another bouquet—a mixture of yellow, orange, and pink Gerbera daisies.
“Tanner, this is so sweet, but totally unnecessary. You bought me flowers yesterday.”
“You said these were your favorite. I wanted you to have your favorite.” He leaned in and left a lingering kiss on my lips, sending shivers down my spine, all the way to my toes.
“I can’t argue with you when you kiss me like that.”
He smirked. “Good. I’ll have to remember that. It might come in handy the next time you’re pissed at me.”
As Tanner drove, I watched the turns he took, trying to figure out where we were going. He finally pulled into a parking lot ten minutes later. Looking at the sign on the building, a knot formed in my stomach. We were at a shooting range.
“What are we doing here?”
“You have a gun, and for whatever reason, you won’t tell me why. If you don’t want to tell me the truth, I can handle that. I don’t know why you feel like you need a gun, but I do know that you need to know how to use it. So, I figured it would be fun if we could learn together.”
My stomach flopped. He knew I was lying to him, yet he was choosing to help me, anyway. He had my back, regardless of my secrets. He was trusting me. But I didn’t deserve it.
The Other Brother (The Collision Series) Page 8
