by Tania Joyce
He shimmied up beside her. “Doesn’t this bring back memories?” Heat flushed her skin when he slid his hand around her lower back and leaned in close. “Wanna help me change?”
“Please don’t start.” She took a step sideways, hoping to lower her body temperature. “We’re way past that.”
“I’m only stirring.” His eyes sparkled as blue as the clear ocean outside.
“I know. That’s the thing.” She had to look away, otherwise she would drown in his gaze. What was wrong with her? She wasn’t pregnant. Her hormones should have settled. Why, whenever he was near, did her head and heart not cooperate? “Stop. Please?”
“Okay then, Ms. Knight.” Hunter lowered his voice and drew down his brows. “What attire will I be wearing for my professional photographic shoot today?”
Kara smiled, shook her head, and fought the urge to flirt back. “You and serious don’t go together. Here.” She shoved a pair of white jeans and a linen button-down shirt at him. “Put these on.”
Hunter clutched the clothes to his chest and backed away, giving her a salute with his free hand. “Yes, ma’am.”
Her heart wanted to follow him, but she reeled it back into place.
Once Everhide came out from behind the modesty screen all dressed and ready, they had quick introductions to the models and crew, and got into position. Wanting to keep out of the way, Kara lingered at the back of the room with Bec, Sophie, and Kate.
“Here we go again. Another photoshoot.” Taking a seat on one of the bar stools at a high table, Bec’s tone lacked any form of enthusiasm.
“What’s wrong?” Kara sat on the stool next to her. Her eyes darted around the room at the action and bustle. Orders were being barked, the rent-a-crowd shuffled into position for the shoot. “Is this one going to differ from the one in LA?”
“Oooh yeah.” Bec bobbed her head. “The LA shoot was tame compared to what’s about to happen here. When it’s only the three of them, it’s easy. But when extras are involved, Gem, Kyle, and Hunter turn everything into a crazed party. It’s not just them I’m worried about; the production team often push the professional boundaries.”
Sophie sat and folded her arms. “Kara, I’m surprised in your line of business you haven’t attended more shoots.”
“I never get the chance.” Kara fidgeted with a drink coaster on the table. “At Conrad’s we have a marketing team that does our promotional work.”
“Well, this will be an eye-opener for you.” Kate flicked her chin toward the crowd. “Watch and learn.”
Kara wanted to ask more questions, but the lights dimmed. Disco LEDs spun a rainbow of colors across the group and deafening music blared through the sound system. Lunchtime daylight was turned into a partying club at midnight.
Gorgeous female bar attendants dressed in low-cut midriff tops that barely covered their ample bosoms appeared from the room behind the bar. The Bierveza logo was blazed across the front of their tops and the backs of their shiny black hot pants that rode up their butt cheeks. Towering tall in their stilettos and with smiles painted in bright red lipstick, they handed out drinks to everyone.
Kara gawked at the crowd who partied, danced, and drank. Hunter’s eyes feasted on each girl who walked past. Jealousy oozed through Kara’s veins like thick, green, oozy slime.
Cameras swirled around the group of people. Flashes went off. There was a never-ending click, click, click from the photographer. The production manager kept ordering Hunter, Kyle, and Gemma to stand in different places, and realign the hold on their beer bottles for the cameras. He ordered the models to move in closer. The music and noise grew louder, ringing in Kara’s ears. Her eyes transfixed on Hunter. The tension in her neck twisted and tightened.
With a beaming smile, Hunter gyrated against one model. He turned and did the same to another. The song changed to “Pony” by Ginuwine, and his seductive dancing jumped to a whole new level. He slipped one hand around the waist of the girl in front of him, flicked his hair back, and laughed. He downed his beer, and the girl slid her hands up over his chest and hooked them around his neck. After his mouthful of beer, he looked down at her, desire sparkling in his eyes, his smile curling with sexiness.
Kara didn’t know if the heat she felt was from her raging jealousy or the chemistry onset. Her heart constricted so hard she thought her ribs cracked.
Why couldn’t he look at her like that? Just her.
Glancing at Gemma and Kyle, they were dancing close to other people too, but they weren’t smothered and surrounded by the models like Hunter.
She glanced to Bec, to Kate and Sophie. They didn’t seem concerned about Hunter’s behavior. Wasn’t he pushing the professional boundaries?
Half a second later, another model moved in on Hunter. His eyes lit up and his grin broadened. He loved this. The attention. The girls clawing and vying for the opportunity to be with him.
Then the model kissed him.
Kara froze. Hunter ripped his head back. He grimaced and waggled his finger at the girl. He turned away and danced with someone else. It didn’t matter. That girl kissed him.
Touching her throat, Kara’s hand trembled. Seeing him all over the models shouldn’t be upsetting her like this. This was his life: touring, girls, partying. This was a photoshoot. So why did it hurt so much? Whether it happened here or somewhere else, he’d always be with some girl. Want to sleep with someone new. He would never change. Not for her. Not for anyone. She’d been avoiding the truth about her feelings for him for too long.
Shit.
She was in love.
With a man she could never have.
A man she should never love.
There was only one thing to do.
Block him out of her heart.
Once and for all.
Pushing all her hurt and jealousy deep inside, a shudder shot down her spine. She had to get through the day.
Get your shit together. You can do this.
But with each passing hour, it got harder and harder. The photoshoot seemed never-ending. Cuts. Reshoots. New positions. At break she went into robot mode, coordinating outfit changes for her friends.
“This is awesome fun, isn’t it?” Gemma danced around on the spot.
None of Gemma’s vibrant energy touched Kara. She pulled her shoulders back. Every muscle on her face ached, fighting the urge to cry.
“How do you do it?” she asked Gemma and searched the rack for her next outfit. “How do you handle seeing girls throwing themselves at Kyle? Twerking against him? Kissing him? Doesn’t it bother you?”
“Bah!” Gemma flicked her hand. “We’ve been doing this for years, don’t forget. It’s like acting. It’s not real. And I’m the one who gets to take him home at the end of the day.”
“How can you be so sure? How can you trust him?”
“We’ve been through so much.” She glanced at Kyle talking to Bec at the back of the room. A smile as bright as the spotlights lit her face. Her eyes went doey and overflowed with love. “I guess I’m secure in our relationship. I love him, and he loves me. Nothing else matters.”
“Lucky you.” Kara blinked a tear from her eye.
“Kar, what’s up?” Gemma placed her hand on Kara’s arm. “Are you not feeling well? Do you need to sit down?”
Kara sucked in a deep breath, drew herself up tall, and wiped her watery eyes. But she couldn’t help herself. She looked in Hunter’s direction. He stood by the bar chatting up the models.
“My suspicions are right, aren’t they?” Gemma had followed her gaze. “It’s not about Ryan anymore, is it? You’ve fallen for him, haven’t you?”
Kara’s heart spasmed. Somehow she managed to nod. “I never meant to. I swore to myself over and over I wouldn’t let him get to me. But he has. And there’s nothing I can do about it. Look at this life you lead. I don’t belong in this world.”
“You seem to fit in fine.”
“No, I’m not.” This was their domain. She didn’t belong, and it
was time to get out. She fumbled with a pair of shorts. “Please don’t say anything to Hunter. He doesn’t need to worry about me. I’m a big girl. I’ll get over him.” She no longer possessed the strength to hold herself together. “I should’ve never come on tour. I never thought I’d call on that favor you offered earlier today. But I am. Gem, I need to go home.”
“We’ve only got two and a half more weeks of tour and we’re done.”
“I know. But you don’t need me.” She watched Hunter laugh, his arm was wrapped around some girl’s waist. The knife twisted in her heart. “And he certainly doesn’t.”
“Kar, please stay.”
She shook her head. Her mind was made up. “I can’t. I’ll talk to Bec and get her to book me a flight.”
“I think you’re crazy. You and Hunter need to sort your shit out. You’re still getting over losing Ryan. You need to be honest with each other.” Gemma sucked in a sharp breath and grimaced. “I will admit, tour is not the place for it. We’re all tired. Emotional. Worn out. But please, give him a chance.”
“That’s just it. He’s had multiple chances, and every time he’s turned me down. There’s only so much rejection I can take. I can’t handle it anymore. Not this time. It hurts too much. I need to go home.”
She felt Hunter’s eyes on her and met his gaze.
His face drew with concern and he mouthed, “Are you okay?”
Kara gave him a reassuring smile, and before she could blink, he turned back to talk to the models. Clenching her jaw, she closed her eyes, trying to erase the image of him burning her brain.
Gemma wrapped her arms around Kara and gave her a huge hug. “I knew you liked him, but not this bad. What kind of terrible friend am I? Please don’t do anything rash. Let’s finish this shoot, and then we’ll talk.”
Someone called out that the break would be over in five minutes.
Gemma stepped back and turned to the clothes rack. “Everything will work out. I promise. But for now, get me into a new outfit so I can go get those hunky men dripping all over me again.”
Kara forced a smile and handed Gemma a pair of ripped denim shorts and sequined top.
But for Kara, the afternoon deteriorated. Watching Hunter with girls hanging off him pushed her over the edge. She walked across the room to Bec and had a quiet chat. Within ten minutes, Bec had organized a flight for Kara and Giles to go back to New York later that night.
“All booked.” Bec placed her cell phone on the table. Bec’s eyes were curious, but she didn’t question her. Kara suspected she knew why: Hunter was the reason she was here, and now he was the reason for her leaving.
“Thanks for helping out today. You’re a lifesaver. And . . . after all that’s happened, I hope you’re on the road to a full recovery.”
“Thanks, Bec.” Kara gave her a heartwarming smile. “You’ve been wonderful.”
After the shoot and whispering a don’t-you-say-a-word farewell to Gemma, Kara left her friends chatting and having photos with the rent-a-crowd. Hunter, surrounded by girls, didn’t even notice when she slipped away and headed back to her room.
Tired and upset, Kara packed the last of her things into her suitcase, zipped it, and stood it by the entrance, ready to leave.
There was a loud knock at her door. Her heart seized. She knew that knock. Shit. She still had half an hour before she had to leave. Did Gemma say something to Hunter?
Her heart shuddered and ached. How was she going to say goodbye?
With trembling hands, she opened the door.
There he stood, sexy as always. Torn jeans and a black button-down shirt highlighting his azure eyes. “Hey. You ready to head out for an early dinner?” His gaze jumped past her. Concern flashed in his eyes when he caught sight of her suitcase. “Kar? . . . What’s going on?”
She gripped onto the door to steady herself. “I’m going home.” She held her chin high. “Tonight.”
“What? No.” He pushed past her and stepped inside her room. The door fell shut with a loud click. “You can’t.”
“I have to.” She turned and followed him into the room. He stood by the bed. She hovered near the TV. “The past ten days have been great on one hand, and shit on the other. I can’t do this anymore. I didn’t know what to expect when I came away with you.”
“What do you mean?”
“I was so numb after losing Ryan, anything sounded viable. I’ve loved spending time with you, and that’s now become a problem.” She fumbled with her hands. “Those nights next to you at the beach house, it was like I was the center of your world. But since we’ve been away, I know I’m not. One moment I think we’re more than friends, then I see you at shoots like today, and I get jealous of the girls around you. I don’t want to be like that. I don’t want to miss you in my bed at night like I have been. I need to get my life back on track. Move on. Without you.”
“Kar, you’re not making any sense.” He clutched at a handful of his hair. His eyes were wild and worried. “We’re just friends. What have I done to make you think otherwise?”
Everything. Your smiles. Your touches. Your caring.
She puffed out a breath. “It’s like what you said to me months ago, ‘It’s not you; it’s me’. Since our night together, I’ve always felt that there was something between us that was stronger than our connection over Ryan. I’ve fallen for you, and I shouldn’t have. So to move on, I need to put distance between us. I’ll be okay. But I need to go home.”
She turned to pick up her purse but he rushed forward and caught her on the arm. “Kar. Wait. You can’t leave. Please stay.”
“Why?” Every muscle in her body ached, tired of suppressing her feelings for him. “Give me one good reason why.”
His eyes burned into hers. A muscle in his tensed jaw ticked. He clenched his fists. But he said nothing.
She was stupid to think he might have felt the same way about her. She grabbed the handle of her suitcase. His hand shot on top of hers.
“Kara?”
“Yes, Hunter.”
“Don’t do this.” His voice quivered as much as his fingers did on top of hers. “Not now.”
“I have to.”
She turned to go, but he didn’t release his grip. He stepped toward her. His warm hands charged up to cup her face, and he kissed her so hard her knees buckled. His mouth, hot and fiery against hers, sent shards of pain through her chest. Tears slipped from her eyes, and her body shuddered. Wrapping his arms around her, he crushed her against his chest. Her heart pounded like a drum against his. He kissed her top lip. Her lower lip. His teasing tongue sent goosebumps shooting down her arms.
Please stop. Please stop. Please stop.
But she couldn’t. She melted against him. Her hands clutched at his shirt, tugging on it, pulling on it, grasping it. She wanted him to fix her wounded heart. Her broken soul. But he never would. He’d only make it worse.
With every thread of willpower, she pushed hard against his chest. She stepped back and wiped her lips with quivering fingers. Her eyes stung like acid. She shook her head and pointed her finger toward his chest. “No. Don’t do this to me. Not now.”
“What? Why?” The desperation in his voice crushed her soul.
“Unless you can stand there and say you want me, all of me, just me, you can’t kiss me like that.” Her knees weakened, unsure if she could stay upright. “If you don’t want me, I have to go.”
Fear flared in his eyes. His whole body stiffened. His mouth moved . . . but no words came out. Not even a sound.
“That’s what I thought. I’m nothing to you. Nothing.” Before her heart shattered onto the floor, she charged past him. “Goodbye, Hunter.” She grabbed her luggage and headed out the door.
Taking weary steps down the corridor, she listened for him to call out, come running after her, stop her. But he never did. Dragging her suitcase and her heart down the hall, she headed for the elevator.
It was time to go home.
Time to move on.
Time for no more Hunter.
Chapter 24
Sitting on the terrace at the New York Country Club, Kara already regretted agreeing to meet her parents for brunch. They were late. Still playing golf. But it was the pitiful glances and overzealous whispers from the people sitting at nearby tables that provided her with the painful reminder that losing Ryan and her involvement with Hunter were still hot topics.
“I thought she went on tour with him.”
“Why is she back?”
“She looks terrible.”
Would she ever escape being the talk of the town?
Crawling out of the confines of her apartment a week after arriving home, Kara had thought the summer sunshine would improve her mood, but it didn’t. While the sun touched and warmed her skin, it could not penetrate her heart. It was dead. Broken. And all because of her own stupidity.
She stared at the bubbles rising in her champagne glass, watching them pop and disappear into nothingness. She let out a sharp puff of air, not missing the irony. She’d overcome hurdle after hurdle. She’d fought for her dreams; struggled to overcome her grief; and just when things were looking better . . . hopeful . . . optimistic . . . pop . . . everything was gone.
All thanks to Hunter Fucking Collins. All thanks to one night with him.
What a fool she’d been to think he was into her. Hunter had no heart—not when it came to getting close to someone. He lived in a protective sphere with Kyle and Gemma that no one would ever penetrate. He’d closed himself off to the prospect of love. It was her own stupid fault for thinking it would be different with her.
Picking up her flute, she took a dainty sip when she really wanted to knock back the whole thing in one gulp. Alcohol numbed the pain. Falling pregnant with Ryan was the worst thing that had ever happened. The rare moments of bliss, of feeling him growing inside her, the scan, having Hunter wanting to be involved in Ryan’s life, and the growth in their friendship, were now smothered by regret, loss, and hate.
