by Steena Marie
“Exactly.”
As much as Nikki enjoyed the conversation, it was getting late and if she was going to make it home in time for Ryan to get off the bus, she needed to get on her way. With her muffin and coffee finished, Nikki stood. “I should go. But it was so nice to meet you, Nyah. Welcome back to town.”
“It was great to meet you too, Nikki. Thank you for making me feel so welcome.”
Nikki’s smile was genuine. “No worries. I know exactly what it feels like to come back after being gone for so long. And trust me when I say it’ll get easier.”
Nyah nodded. “Maybe we can do this again?”
“Absolutely. I’m sure I’ll run into you this weekend at the festival. We’ll exchange information then, okay?”
The women parted with promises to get phone numbers and have another coffee, and as Nikki walked away, she thought about how nice it would be to have another friend in town. Especially one who knew what it was like to be an outsider in their own town. Of course, that feeling had passed for Nikki and it would pass for Nyah, too. Especially when she started to run into her old friends.
But she hadn’t been very enthusiastic about running into Melissa again. The thought hit Nikki as she walked through her front door. And if she had been the first person to know that Nyah was back in town, that meant that Melissa didn’t know yet. And if what Parker said about Nyah being the paramedic to respond to Wade’s accident was true, things were about to get a whole lot more complicated in town and just in time for the Pumpkin Festival.
11
Melissa
As she took in a deep breath, Melissa slowly straightened her back, not enjoying the aches and pains from being bent over for so long. She should have Abby out here to rake the last of the leaves in her backyard, but she’d sent her daughter off to deliver flyers before dinner and took the job on herself.
She needed an excuse to work off the brownie she’d eaten at lunch today.
A horn briefly honked before a car door slammed. Curious, Melissa made her way to the side of the house. Parker headed towards her front door.
“I’m over here,” she called out.
Parker stopped and headed her way. Melissa returned to the pile of leaves she created earlier and leaned the rake against the house. She was glad Parker was here—she could use the break.
“We need to talk.”
Parker stood there, his arms crossed and the fiercest frown she’d ever seen him wear. What was his problem?
“Well, hello to you too.” If anyone was going to be upset, it would be her. First he’d stood her up and then betrayed her. She’d picked up the phone numerous times to call him and ream him out, but every time she did, Abby would enter the room.
Besides, she’d managed to calm down somewhat since her outburst at Nikki. She still didn’t appreciate Parker telling his girlfriend before giving her a heads-up, nor had she liked how Nikki had brought it up, as if it were something they could bond over…but she didn’t want to dwell on it anymore. She couldn’t. Even though things had been awkward between them before Nikki had left Becky’s, Melissa had apologized for her words.
She had a mean bite when it came to words and she’d been pretty hurtful.
“You need to apologize to Nikki.” The true anger in Parker’s gaze shocked Melissa.
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me, Mel. I want you to apologize to Nikki.”
Melissa crossed her own arms, copying him, and gave him a frown to match his own. Two could play at this game.
“What for?”
His brow rose. “You know what for.”
She snorted. “If anyone owes anyone an apology, it’s you to me.” She stepped closer to him and had to stop herself from poking him in the chest.
She was not going to get angry. She was not going to get angry. She was not…
“Don’t turn this around on me. I don’t know what you said to Nikki, but it was uncalled for.”
Melissa shook her head in confusion. What she said? When? The last time she spoke to Nikki had been at Melissa’s and she’d already apologized. Over and done, in her book.
She said as much to Parker, who looked confused.
“You know me, Park. I blow up but then I own up. I said I was sorry. I knew I’d gone overboard. You can’t tell me she’s still upset about it?”
He shrugged. “Not everyone forgives as easily.”
“Well, if she’s going to be part of this family, she’d better learn. If she’s got an issue with me, then it’s up to her to come to me—not you. She’s a big girl; I expect her to act like it.” Inwardly, Melissa sighed. Sensitive much? It had been over twenty-four hours. Enough time that Nikki obviously stewed in her hurt and then dumped it on Parker, expecting him to take care of it for her.
That’s not how Melissa dealt with things at all.
“Fair enough. At least talk to her, okay? She’s important to me and I…I want her in my life.”
Melissa nodded. “I figured as much if you went and betrayed my trust to her.”
Parker reacted as if she’d slapped him, and in a way, she just had. And it felt good. She wasn’t one to hold her punches; she said it like she saw it and if she was wrong, then so be it. But in this case, she wasn’t.
“I know. I’m sorry.” Shamefaced, Parker uncrossed his arms and reached out, as if he wanted to give her a hug.
Like hell he would. Not until he explained himself. She wasn’t upset at him, not anymore, but she wasn’t going to let this go either. Besides—he’d been the one to tell her they needed to talk and then he’d left her worrying for days on end about Wade. That wasn’t fair.
“I know she’s important to you, and I get that. I really do. But it wasn’t your secret to tell—not without giving me fair warning first.”
Dejected, Parker dropped his arms and grunted as he sat down on the steps of Melissa’s back porch. She joined him.
“He’s my brother. Sometimes I think you forget that.” Parker’s voice was low and she almost missed his words.
She wanted to deny his claim but she didn’t. She couldn’t because he was right.
“Oh, what a tangled web we weave…” Her voice trailed off as she worried her hands. “Asking you to keep my secret for this long was—” She struggled to find the right words. Wrong? Hard? Difficult?
“What you needed.” Parker finished for her. “And I was the one who agreed. Maybe I shouldn’t have. Maybe I should have fought with you on it.” He shook his head. “It’s easier to look and judge our actions, and we can’t do that either.” He gave her a sad smile and in that moment, Melissa realized just how much of a strength he’d been for her in the past nine years.
“I’ve made such a mess out of things,” she admitted. The realization of that weighed heavy on her. She was in so thick she had no idea how to climb out of the hole she’d dug for herself. She’d talked with Becky and strategized a bit, but bottom line, there was only one way to repair what she’d done. And that was to be honest.
“You…we…made mistakes. And we’re running out of time to fix it.”
The way he’d stressed the last bit caught her attention.
“What do you mean, we’re running out of time?”
Parker sighed before he rubbed his face with his hands. And then messed up his hair. Then stood up. Those three actions in a row only meant one thing.
Now she was really worried.
“Parker? What’s going on? You told me we needed to talk…is Wade okay?”
“Has Abby talked to you yet?”
Confused, Melissa shook her head. “About what?”
Parker paced a straight line in front of her, his focus off in the distance and his hands stuck deep in his pant pockets.
“Parker?”
“Is she here?”
Melissa shook her head.
“Maybe we should wait then.”
Melissa pushed herself up from the stairs, her hands fisted as she stepped in his path and forced h
im to stop.
“Enough. For days you’ve had me worried, stressed that something is wrong. Do. Not. Play. This. Game. With. Me.” Her chest hurt as her emotions strangled her. The air in her lungs seemed to cut off and her heart pumped faster. Black dots danced before her and she stumbled. If it wasn’t for Parker catching her, she would have fallen down.
“Sit. Take a deep breath. In and out. In and out.” His hand pushed her head down towards her knees and Melissa focused on breathing just like he told her to.
“You need to tell me, Parker,” Melissa finally said after the dizziness passed.
Parker sat on his heels in front of her. Concern and pity filled his gaze as he reached for her hands and held tight.
“She knows,” he said quietly.
Melissa shook her head. No. She heard him wrong. She had to have. He was talking about Nikki, right?
“Abby knows about Wade, Mel. They’ve been writing letters back and forth for the past year or so.”
Melissa’s world dropped. She felt as though she were sucked into a black hole that stretched out until there was nothing.
He couldn’t have just said that. How? How could that be possible?
“I don’t understand. How? How could she know?” She bit down hard on her lip, hoping the pain would stop the flood of tears that threatened to fill her eyes.
“It’s my fault.”
“I’m sorry?”
Parker dropped her hands and stood. “It’s my fault. She was over one day after school and found a letter from him on my table.”
“When?” Cold dread filled her heart.
“Over a year ago,” he reminded her.
She slowly nodded her head, taking in what he’d just said. Her daughter had known about her father for the past year and said nothing. Nothing. What did that mean?
“Why didn’t she tell me?” Wait…she had a better question. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Parker rubbed his hand through his hair again. “I don’t know. I should have and I’m sorry. But I didn’t think anything of it. She saw the envelope and asked me about it. I tried to make it sound like it was nothing and she left it alone. I thought it was over, that she believed me.”
“You should have told me.”
He nodded. “I should have. I didn’t find out until last month that they’d been writing.”
Melissa was so confused right now. Abby and Wade had been writing for over a year because her daughter found a letter from her husband on her uncle’s table but everything was kept hush-hush until last month?
“You’re not doing a very good job of explaining yourself, Parker, and I’m about to get really freaked out. Abby will be home any minute and I want to know all the facts before I talk to her about this.”
“She hasn’t told you anything?”
She shook her head. “Nothing. We’ve talked about Wade sparingly, here and there, but nothing to grab my attention and make me question anything.”
He pursed his lips in thought. “I only found out about it because Wade mentioned it briefly last time he called.”
“What did he say?”
“That he enjoyed getting to know his daughter again.”
Those words hit her heart like a ton of bricks. It carried the weight of guilt: she was the reason Wade didn’t know his daughter like he should. She’d made so many mistakes. So many.
How could he ever forgive her? Abby must hate her too.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
Parker sat back down beside her and put his arm around her. Melissa leaned in and rested her head on his shoulder. She couldn’t have asked for a better family with him in her life. He reminded her of Wade in so many ways. The ache in her heart intensified and she felt as if she were going to break into pieces if she wasn’t careful.
“I should have and I’m sorry. I wanted to talk to Abby first, find out her side of the story. But then—”
He was cut off by Abby’s sudden appearance at the back door.
“Hey, Uncle Parker! Here for dinner finally? Or are you going to take us out to make up for standing us up?” Abby wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a hug.
“Hey, Mom.” She winked at Melissa before she plopped down on the deck behind them. “So, what’s the plan?” Her earbuds hung from her neck and they could faintly hear her music before she turned her iPod off.
“Hey, Abbs. I’m not sure what we’re doing for dinner…” Melissa looked at Parker, who only shrugged.
“I’m in the mood for a good burger and fries. What do you think?” Parker angled his body to look at Abby, who grinned.
“But first, I think it’s time we all had a real solid family chat. What do you think?”
Parker’s words drained the smile off of Abby’s face.
“What about?” Her voice was timid, quiet even. Melissa rested her hand on Abby’s knee and squeezed.
“We’ve got some secrets happening in this family.” Melissa managed to squeeze the words out. “But I think maybe,” she wiped at a tear that ran down her face, “maybe we should talk about them. What do you think?”
Abby slowly nodded her head before she clasped her hands together.
“This is about Dad, isn’t it?” Abby said.
Both Melissa and Parker nodded.
“I’m sorry I kept him from you.” Melissa wanted to reach over and give her daughter a hug, to soften the blow of her own betrayal but she didn’t. She wanted—no, she needed—to know how her daughter felt right now before anything else.
“Yeah. I get it. I mean…it wasn’t okay and I was angry at you—like really angry, Mom—for a long time, but Dad explained it all. So I get it.”
No way she was getting off that easy. And Wade explained it all? For her? Why would he do that?
“What did your dad say, honey?”
Abby finally raised her gaze from her hands and blinked.
“I don’t hate you, if that’s what you’re worried about. Not anymore.”
And just like that, Melissa was sucker-punched in the gut. Her daughter had actually hated her. Just like she expected.
“But it’s cool,” Abby continued. “Dad said you were only trying to protect me, that if people really knew what had happened, it would make things really difficult for both of us here. And he’s right, right?” She looked at Parker this time. “Kids would have bullied me about having a murdering father or tease me that he was in jail. Right?”
Parker nodded. “But not your friends. They would have stood by you.”
“I know. But how do you explain something like that? I mean…it’s kind of hard to live with. My dad killed a little girl. She would have been my age by now.”
“It was an accident, honey.” It killed Melissa to hear those words come out of Abby’s mouth.
“I know. But still. She’s dead because of him.”
Melissa had lived with this knowledge for nine years and in all that time, the pain of what had happened never dissipated. She could only imagine looking at it from a teen perspective.
Black and white.
He fell asleep at the wheel and killed a little girl the same age as their own daughter. The guilt had been too much for him.
There was no gray.
In this case, Abby was very much like her father.
“I understand if you’re mad at me, Abbs.” Melissa gave her daughter the permission that maybe she needed.
“Yeah. I was mad. Angry. I mean, you told me he left us. You lied, Mom. You lied to me.”
Melissa nodded. There was no escaping that truth.
“But I get what you did. I’m not giving you an excuse, just saying I understand. I was young. I wouldn’t have understood it and all you wanted was to protect me, right?” Her voice pleaded with Melissa to agree. Her gaze told her she wouldn’t understand if Melissa said otherwise.
This time Melissa did get up from her spot on the step and sat next to her daughter. Her arms wrapped around her and when Abby leaned in and relaxed
against her, Melissa couldn’t stop the tears that fell.
“That’s all I’ve wanted to do, honey. Protect you. Keep you safe. But I messed up. I should have told you the truth a long time ago.” Melissa ran her hand down Abby’s long hair. The action soothed both their hurting souls. “I shouldn’t have kept this a secret from you.”
“Yeah, you should have. Told me, I mean. You can buy me a new laptop to make up for it though.” The twinkle in Abby’s gaze had Melissa laughing.
“Not on your life, kiddo. Save your money, you know that.” But good try. She’d give her that.
“Abby, about the letters…” Melissa wasn’t sure what she wanted to ask or not ask. These letters, they were private, between Abby and Wade, and yet…
“I should have told you about them. Dad told me to, but…this was my little thing with him, know what I mean?”
Melissa sighed. She got it. She did.
“Sounds like you’re getting to know your dad pretty well?” Parker asked.
Abby’s face lit up like a Christmas tree. “He’s cool. He’s been telling me all sorts of stories, of things he’s learned and the people he’s met. They’re not all bad—some just made stupid mistakes like him. I just can’t wait to actually see him.”
“That could work. We’d have to fill out some forms and it will take time but…” As much as Melissa hated the idea of taking Abby to see her father in prison, this was the least she could do. Even though they had a year before his release, she wasn’t going to ask her to wait that long.
“What? Forms? No.” Abby leaned forward, the excitement on her face almost palpable. Melissa’s heart clenched and she knew whatever her daughter was about to say was going to rock her world, and not in a good way.
“I mean when he’s here, next weekend.”
12
Nikki
The last week had been a kaleidoscope of emotions for Nikki: from a high with Parker when he finally opened up to her about the truth of everything, to the low of being berated by Melissa. She didn’t care what the other woman had gone through—no one deserved to be spoken to that way. Nikki had gone through her share of drama herself, and she would never lash out like that at someone who was trying to help. At least she hoped she wouldn’t. Either way, Melissa was important to Parker, so she’d do her best to let it go. But she wouldn’t forget.
