by Amber Kelly
I run the two blocks up to the diner, and as soon as I burst in, dragging George behind me, Faye hurries over.
“What’s wrong, Sonia?”
“I found Momma unconscious in her shop. They have her in an ambulance. Can you take George for me?” I ask her frantically.
“Yes, yes, of course.”
I hand her the leash and take off out the door. I call Don and tell him to meet me in the emergency room. I stop and lock up the shop and run to my car.
By the time I make it to the hospital and park, Don is already at the desk, asking after Momma.
When he sees me, he comes over and puts his hand on my shoulder.
“They think it was a heart attack,” he tells me.
“What are they going to do?”
“Mr. Chambers,” the nurse calls.
“Right here.”
“Your wife is being prepped for an emergency surgery. If you want to follow me, I’ll show you to a private waiting area up on the cardiac floor, and the doctor will come to speak to you shortly.”
Surgery. Shit, it must be bad.
We follow her to the closest elevator, and she takes us to the third floor, which is the heart and vascular wing. Then, she leads us to a waiting room with a couple of couches, four recliners, a wet bar with a mini fridge, and a flat-screen TV.
“If you wait here, someone will check in with you as soon as they have any news,” she tells us before disappearing and leaving us in stunned silence.
I tap a text to Elle and Bellamy, telling them where we are and what we know.
Both respond immediately that they are on their way.
I sit on the couch beside my stepdad, and I hold his hand tightly as we wait for any news.
Before anyone can come to speak to us, Bellamy and Brandt, and Elle and Walker come through the door. I burst into tears the minute my eyes fall on my best friends. Don gets up and stands with the guys, and the girls come to me and sit on either side of me, wrapping their arms around me. They hold me while I cry. All my fear is coming to the surface and leaking out while I’m in the safety of their presence.
We are still huddled together when the surgeon comes in.
He addresses Don but speaks to us all. “Mrs. Chambers has suffered a massive myocardial infarction.” He flips the switch on a light board mounted on the wall. “As you can see, she has a blockage here in these four arteries. They are substantial and will require immediate bypass surgery. We’ll take healthy arteries from her legs and arms to bypass the blocked ones.”
“She’s a healthy, active woman. I don’t understand,” Don says.
“Heart disease is a problem for one in five women. Oftentimes, the signs or symptoms don’t appear until it’s too late, or women brush them off as normal stress symptoms.”
“She hasn’t had any symptoms at all,” Don tells him.
“Yes, she has. She’s been feeling dizzy lately. I thought it was low blood sugar from skipping meals,” I tell them.
“She’s been more tired than usual too. She used to work into the late evening at least three nights a week, but she’s been coming home earlier and earlier. I just assumed it was burnout and getting older,” Don adds.
“That’s the problem. All of those are indicators, but they could be many things that are easy to explain away. The good thing is, she’s stable, and we feel confident we can get her recovered and back home to you guys.”
“Thank you, Doc,” Don says as he shakes his hand.
“We’ll be getting started in about thirty minutes, and the surgery will take about five hours. Give or take an hour, depending on how it goes once we’re in. I’ll have my nurse come out to keep you guys updated as we go along.”
With that, he leaves, and we all sit down and absorb the information.
In the next hour, the room fills with all of my and Momma’s friends. Dottie, Beverly, and Elaine arrive together, as do Doreen, Ria, and Madeline.
Dallas and Sophie arrive next, after waiting for Myer and Braxton to get home to the babies.
Brandt and Walker are about to leave to fetch food that Faye called to say she had boxed up for everyone.
“Can you guys get George from her? I just left her at the diner without any supplies.”
“We’ll get her,” Brandt assures me.
“You can drop her off at the ranch with Marvin on your way back. I’ll call and tell him she is coming,” Dottie says. She looks at me. “We have everything she needs, and we’ll take good care of her for as long as you need.”
“Thank you.”
Don paces for a while, and then he tells us he’s running down to the cafeteria to get a cup of coffee.
“Men don’t handle crises well,” Doreen says once the door closes behind him. “He just needs some space.”
I nod.
“It’s going to be a long night. You guys don’t have to stay,” I tell them.
Bellamy lays her head on my shoulder. “We’re not going anywhere.”
They all voice their agreement.
Thank God.
Sonia
“I can’t believe this happened. I was just there this morning, helping her move the display shelves in the consignment shop, and she was fine. Better than fine,” I tell them.
“We never know when something is going to come along and knock the wind from our sail,” Ria states.
“I wish time would slow down. Not because I have a problem with aging. I’m fine with getting older. I wish it would slow down because I’m not ready for the people in my life that I look to for covering to become sick or frail. I still feel like that little girl who needs her momma and aunts and uncles to run to when she’s sick, hurt, or scared. I still look to them for protection and provision and direction. I’m not ready for the generation before me to move on. I need time to slow down. I know that’s not the way it works. I just need it to be,” Sophie says precisely what I’m feeling.
I was young when my father died. I was devastated, and it hurt like crazy, but my momma is different. She and I are more than mother and daughter. She’s my friend. The person that I see or talk to every day, no matter what. She’s my person.
“Aunt Doe and Aunt Ria, you can never leave us,” Elle agrees.
Doreen smiles. “I’m afraid that’s not how it works, girl. Our time will come, and by the grace of God, it will be before any of you. But even once I’m gone, you’ll still have me. I’ve taught you everything I know about life. I poured it into you as we went along. That’s what you do with each generation. That’s what families do,” Doreen replies.
“I don’t think I absorbed any of it,” Elle tells her.
Doreen and Ria laugh and exchange a knowing look with Dottie, Beverly, and Madeline.
“Of course you did. What makes Aunt Ria’s garden grow so well?” she asks.
“Coffee grounds!” Sophie answers.
“Yep. And what is the secret to making my fried apple pies so delicious?”
“Vanilla bean seeds,” Elle replies.
“And why do my biscuits rise so high?” Doreen asks, and her eyes land on mine.
“Lard instead of oil,” I whisper.
“See, we’ve been planting seeds into all of you children. Where do you think we learned how to knit, cook, garden, raise children, mend fences, and love someone through a broken heart? Where do you think we got all that knowledge from?” Ria asks.
“Gram?” Sophie murmurs.
She nods.
“Exactly. Our momma sowed the same seeds in us to give us the tools so that we could pass them down to you guys, and you’ll pass them down to your little ones. Lily Claire will be baking biscuits one day, and she’ll grab the lard even if her recipe calls for vegetable oil, and she’ll never even know why she does it.”
“So, even when we are promoted to heaven, you’ll still have us. We’re right inside of you,” Doreen adds.
“I still don’t want you to go,” Sophie says.
“Well, I’m not planning on i
t anytime soon. I want to be around when Elle has babies. We might have instilled everything we had in her, but that Walker is a work in progress, and I have a feeling his genes are strong,” she says, and we all giggle.
The nurse comes in at hour two to let us know that things are going well and Momma is doing great.
We breathe a sigh of relief at the news.
“Here, dear, why don’t you try to get some shut-eye? We’ll wake you if another update comes,” Ria says as she covers me with a blanket.
“I don’t think I can sleep,” I tell her.
“It’s going to be a long wait. Let us take the night shift for you, so you can be refreshed when you see your mother in the morning. Just close your eyes and try,” Beverly adds.
I give in and cuddle under the blanket as I lay my head on Bellamy’s shoulder. It doesn’t take long for me to fall off to slumber.
A couple of hours later, I bolt awake. I blink away the sleep and stretch my arms above my head to release the crick in my neck.
I look over to see Bellamy and Elle asleep as well as Dallas and Sophie, but my mother’s oldest and dearest friends are keeping watch with Don.
“Anything new?” I whisper across the room, and Don shakes his head.
I stand and make my way to the mini fridge, where I grab a bottle of water and down it. Then, I take a seat beside Doreen, and she wraps an arm around my shoulders. When she closes her eyes, I can hear the slight murmur of an uttered prayer on her lips against my hair.
I’m not sure how long we sit here before Momma’s surgeon comes back in. It seems like an eternity. Everyone has awakened, and the television is on a morning talk show. Walker and Braxton brought breakfast sandwiches from the diner, and Elaine came with a basket of muffins.
When the door opens, Don and I are on our feet again.
“Mr. Chambers,” the doctor greets.
“How’s she doing, Doc?” Don asks.
“I’m sorry, sir. But your wife went into cardiac arrest as we were closing the chest cavity. We did all we could, but she was too weak.”
And just like that, the world around us comes crashing down.
Foster
When I arrive at the ranch, Marvin meets me in the driveway.
“Good morning,” I greet.
“Hi, Foster. Did you hear the news about Kathy?” he asks.
“What news?”
“Sonia found her collapsed at her shop last night, and the ambulance rushed her to county hospital. Apparently, she had a heart attack. Beverly and Bellamy and the rest of the gals have been at the hospital with Don and Sonia all night.”
“Is she going to be okay?” I ask.
“I believe so. The doctor told them it’s a fairly common surgery and that she should be out of the hospital in a few days. Recovery might take a minute though.”
Shit, I bet my girl is a wreck.
“Do you mind if I head that way after we get all the feeding done? I’ll come back and finish up this evening.”
“Not at all, son. I thought you’d want to be there.”
“Thanks.”
I head to the barn, and Myer already has the trailer on the ATV loaded down with feed.
“I’ll meet you out in the back pasture,” I say as I grab my saddle from the rack.
When we make it back to the barn about two hours later, Truett is laying fresh hay in the stalls.
“You guys want me to go into town and grab sandwiches for lunch? Dottie isn’t home, so we’re on our own,” he asks as I dismount, and Myer parks the four-wheeler.
“I’m going to head to the hospital to check on Kathy,” I tell him when Marvin comes rushing down to meet us.
“Bellamy just called the house. Kathy didn’t make it through the surgery,” he tells us.
No.
Shock hits me like a bolt of lightning, temporarily rendering me speechless.
“Fuck,” Myer says as he lowers his head.
“I’ve got to go. I have to get to Sonia,” I say as I hand my horse’s lead off to Truett.
“I’ll drive you,” Myer offers, and we race to his truck.
He calls Dallas and learns that they are all still at the hospital and that Don and Sonia are in the room, saying good-bye to Kathy.
“I’ve got Foster with me. We’re in the truck, heading in that direction, and we should be there in ten minutes,” he tells her before ending the call.
“What happened?” I ask.
“She had a heart attack last night and they took her straight into surgery. She went into cardiac arrest on the operating table as they were closing her chest, and the doctors just weren’t able to resuscitate her.”
I remove my cap and run my hands through my hair. “I just spoke to her yesterday evening. Less than twenty-four hours ago. She left me a message, asking me to come by her shop on my way home.”
My heart aches as I recount the memory.
“I didn’t mean to hurt her. If I could change things, I would, but no matter what, a baby is coming in four months, and I’m responsible for it,” I tell her.
She lays a hand on my cheek. “I know you didn’t, and given time, she’ll see it too. I know my baby girl; she just needs space to process the situation. She loves you, Foster. That’s the important thing. If you love each other enough, there is nothing that the two of you can’t overcome together. She’s lost and adrift right now, but love is powerful, and it can anchor her. So, you be patient and don’t give up. You are the one,” she says.
“I won’t. I promise.”
She smiles, slides her hand to mine, and squeezes. “Good.”
“And Sonia and I spent the entire evening with her and Don recently. She was fine. She was cooking, laughing, and being her usual happy self. How can she be gone?”
“Do you want me to tell Dallas to let Sonia know you’re coming?” he asks.
I shake my head. “Doesn’t matter. Even if she says she doesn’t want me there, she needs me, and I’m going to her.”
Myer nods his approval.
When the elevator doors open to the third floor and we step out, I catch sight of Sonia as she walks out of the door to a patient room.
She’s white as a ghost, her eyes are swollen, and her legs are shaking.
“Sonia,” I call as I head her way with Myer behind me.
She looks up, and when her eyes lock with mine, she starts to buckle at the knees, and I take off running.
I catch her before she hits the floor. I gently pick her up and cradle her in my arms.
“I got you,” I whisper into her hair.
“My momma’s gone,” she cries into my neck.
“I know, baby.”
“Momma’s gone,” she repeats.
I hold her as close as I can as her heart shatters. I can feel every sob rocket through her body as she clings to me.
“Please tell me it’s not real, Foster,” she begs.
“I wish I could.”
“She’s my best friend. She can’t leave me.”
As much as I want to shield her from this pain, I can’t fix this for her. All I can do is hold her.
Don walks out of the room next, a picture of brokenness. He looks as if he is about to fall as well.
I walk us to him by the girls’ concerned, tear-streaked, red faces peering from the waiting room window. Myer walks past us and joins them, embracing Bellamy and Dallas as he enters.
Don reaches a shaky hand and places it on top of Sonia’s head as she continues to sob into my neck.
“You got her, son?” he asks.
“Yes, sir. I’m taking her home with me,” I tell him.
He nods.
“Good. She shouldn’t be alone tonight.”
“Neither should you.”
He looks over his shoulder at the crowd.
“Jefferson invited me to stay at Rustic Peak tonight and Doreen and Ria insisted I accept.”
“You should be with friends,” I say.
Elle joins us.
&
nbsp; “Bellamy, Brandt, Walker, and I are coming with you,” she tells me.
“You guys don’t have to,” I start.
“We’re going wherever Sonia goes tonight,” she says and I know that nothing is keeping them from her.
I nod.
“Okay. We’ll need a ride. Myer brought me,” I tell her.
“I’ll tell Walker to pull his truck around. Brandt and Bells are going to stop in town and get food,” she says, and then she leans in and whispers in Sonia’s ear.
“Do you want them to stop by your apartment and get anything?”
Sonia shakes her head.
“Are you sure?”
She lifts her eyes to Elle’s.
“I want the blanket off my bed. The ivory one Momma made me,” she answers as both of them try to hold it together.
“We’ll get it for you,” Elle promises, through her tears.
She walks off and Sonia looks at Don.
“This isn’t real, is it?”
“I’m afraid so, baby girl.”
“She was fine this afternoon. She was happy and healthy and she can’t be gone.”
She whimpers and her body starts quaking again and I tighten my grip on her.
Don wraps his arms around the both of us and they weep together.
I’ve never felt so helpless.
“I don’t know how to exist in a world without her in it,” she whispers.
“We’ll do it together,” I murmur.
I’ve never felt so helpless in my damn life.
“We’ll all do it together,” I repeat.
Sonia
We are all gathered in the church for Momma’s service. I’m still numb. I’m going through the motions, but none of it seems natural. I’m not sure when the full impact of this loss will hit me. I’m assuming it will be once the service is over and everyone who has been so close and kind the past couple of days returns to their routine when Momma is in the ground and not in her shop on Monday morning.
I’m seated in the front row with Don on one side and Foster on the other. As I look up to the front of the aisle and see Momma’s casket, my mind drifts back to the day that we were here, in this same church, seated in this exact spot, saying our good-byes to Daddy.
