by Rye Hart
Jared, the youngest of the Walker boys, was the first to catch my eye. He was the one I'd spent the least amount of time with, simply because he'd been younger and was the wilder one of the brothers. He was always known for finding a good time. His hair was shaggy and his face was scruffy. His arms were corded with muscle and colored with tattoos that started beneath the hem of his snug shirt.
He wore incredibly tight, dark jeans and a black shirt that hugged every taut, corded muscle that defined his chest and abs. He'd filled out a lot over the years, really grew up, and yes, I couldn't stop myself from staring.
Next to him was Evan, the middle child. Evan's hazel eyes met mine and he smiled, gently. He was the quiet one. The loner. Evan had preferred reading and studying over partying. I remember that there were many nights we'd stayed up way too late talking philosophy or the universe.
These days, he was in software development, not that I was surprised. His hair was short, but messy, as if he simply forgot to run a comb through it before he left the house. A light blue sweater and dress slacks complemented his look along with a pair of dark framed glasses that gave him a Clark Kent quality.
Finally, Gabriel, turned to me. He was the only one not smiling. We hadn't exactly been on good terms for a while – not since I married his best friend, actually. He'd taken it the hardest of all of the brothers, cutting both of us out of his life. Damn, he looked good though. Sleek, nicely styled hair, a suit that was tailored to fit his well-developed body. He'd graduated Harvard, owned his own business and was doing well for himself. Very well for himself, in fact. Not that any of the Walkers were hurting for money, but Gabe was a self-made millionaire several times over.
He was the tallest of the brothers, and also the oldest, with a chiseled face that was so perfect, it hurt. His face was sculpted with sharp edges and lines that reminded me of a Greek statue and his body was even more defined than it had been years ago.
Their parents stood up behind them, the smiles wide on their pleasant faces. Richard and Portia Walker were wonderful people whom I always considered family as well. It had been too long since I'd seen either of them too, and they smiled warmly back at me. Richard was looking a little rough around the edges these days, but Portia – as always – was the epitome of style and grace. Her hair was silver, but she managed to make it look like a choice rather than a sign of age, perfectly coiffed and cut for her face shape. Her large, blue eyes were a stark contrast to that of her boys – all of whom had brown to hazel eyes themselves, thanks to their father.
It felt overwhelming to have everyone staring at me, and I couldn't think of anything to say. My heart was staggering around in my chest drunkenly and my throat was suddenly as dry as the Sahara. They all seemed to be waiting on me to say something.
“Uhh, hey everyone,” I said, raising my hand in an awkward wave. “Thanks for coming”
“It's good to see you again, Hadley,” Evan said.
He got up from the table and walked over, wrapping his arms around me. I leaned into him and took in the scent of his cologne. Soft and musky, it reminded me of younger days. Surprisingly, it was the same cologne he used to wear back in the day. Tears welled up in my eyes as I remembered the way things used to be, and the yearning for those better, simpler days weighed heavy on my mind and heart.
By the time he pulled away, I'd wiped my eyes and the fake smile was back on my face. Evan kneeled down and greeted Grayson, and I nearly cried again. Chris would have been so happy to see his friends taking to his son, and yet, he wasn't here for this little reunion.
My heart almost couldn't take it.
By that point, the others had gathered around as well, and I was trying to remain calm. Everyone took turns hugging us, except for Gabe who stayed near the back. His face was blank, and he seemed content to remain aloof. Clearly, the ice between us over my marriage to Chris, had not thawed. Our eyes met, briefly, but he looked away. I half expected him not to come forward. He still looked pissed, but he surprised me. Once everyone else had taken their seat, he too walked over and hugged me.
His breathe was warm against my cheek, and his words shook me right to my core.
“It's good to see you again, Hadley,” he said, whispering it so only he and I could hear it. “I've missed you.”
“I've missed you too,” I said.
He pulled back from the hug, and for a second, it was only the two of us there. His eyes were more green than brown, and they were easily some of the most beautiful eyes I'd ever seen. He didn't look any different from when he'd left me, years ago, to go study at Harvard.
Okay, maybe he was more filled out and his jawline was more defined now than it had been then. He certainly looked manlier than I remembered, but his boyish crooked smile was just the same.
Just like before, it made me go weak in the knees.
It brought back so many memories, so many raw feelings I wasn't prepared for in the moment.
Gabriel and I had had something special way back when; back before I'd married Chris. Back before he'd gone off to college. I was never able to forgive him for leaving me and maybe that played some role in how close Chris and I became No, I wasn't upset that he'd gone off to college, I was actually proud of him for that. I'd been upset because it felt like he'd forgotten about me back here in Colorado. Then again, in time, I'd also forgotten about him in a way, and moved on. When I graduated a year later, I went away to UC San Diego and Chris had followed me.
His smile wavered as we took our seats, and he didn't even bother to look at me again through most of dinner.
I guess in his eyes, some sins were unforgivable after all.
CHAPTER TWO
GABE
When Evan had mentioned dinner at the Rose's in honor of Hadley's return, I initially turned him down. Told him I had work to do. The last thing I wanted was to be around her. To be reminded of what she'd done. He'd kept on pestering me and I'd finally given in, just to get him off my back.
Now though, as I tried my damnedest to not look at her, I knew I'd made a mistake. I shouldn't have come. Everything about her was intoxicating to me – the gentle scent of vanilla that lingered on me long after our embrace had ended, the way her hair had tickled my cheek, the high-pitched tinkling sound of her laughter.
Everything she did tempted me to fall down that rabbit hole again, and God knew, that was the last thing I needed right then.
“Gabe, so how's business going?” Mrs. Rose asked, pulling me back into the conversation.
Clearing my throat, I looked over at her and said, “Great, actually. We just expanded into Europe this year and are continuing to grow. Things couldn't be better.”
“What is it you do again, dear?” she asked.
“Resort development,” I said. “I build luxury hotels and resorts around the world. Like Crimson Peak out near Aspen.”
“Oh yes, I've heard great things about that,” she said, looking over at her daughter who wouldn't meet my gaze. “Did you hear about that hotel, Hadley? It's support to be one of the best in Colorado.”
“Can't say that I have,” she muttered.
She focused on her plate, twirling the pasta around her fork, very pointedly refusing to look at me. “You know, I could always get you a suite there if you'd like to take a vacation,” I said.
I was talking to Mrs. Rose, but Hadley answered for her. “I don't think that'll be necessary,” she said. “But, thank you for the offer.
The room fell silent as an awkward, heavy silence filled the air. Hadley didn't bother to look up, not until her son dropped his fork on the floor. She bent down to retrieve it, showing off some of her cleavage on the way down. Even though I knew it was wrong, I couldn't help but admire the view. Since high school, she'd grown into a beautiful woman, and I found her new, curvier body causing some very strong reactions in my groin. A tightness in my pants made it incredibly uncomfortable to sit there and stare at her.
“If everyone is finished,” Mrs. Rose said, “I'll bring
out dessert. Everyone likes carrot cake, don't they?”
Everyone mumbled in agreement around the table, and Hadley stood up. “I'll help you, mom.”
“No, dear, you can stay here and visit,” she said. “I'll be just a second.”
Hadley stared at us, sitting around the table, and for the first time, I almost felt bad for her. She seemed to be under a microscope and not sure which way to look. To varying degrees, we’d all been disappointed when she’d married Chris and our friendships had cooled. She seemed to feel that coolness resting on her shoulders.
Hadley sat down again and focused her attention on Grayson. It was obvious she loved that little boy. I could see it in the way her eyes lit up with joy whenever he smiled or laughed, to the mother bear vibe she was totally sending to the rest of us. He was a cute kid and looked exactly like his father. I felt a slight twinge of sadness for all that we’d lost. My parents were on the other side of Grayson, and my mother was doting upon the little boy. I finished my glass of wine and leaned back in the chair, sighing deeply and checking my watch as Evan nudged me in the side with his elbow.
“What?” I asked.
He leaned closer to me and whispered, “Leave the past in the past. Forget about it and stop being a dick,” he said. “Things are different now.”
“Don't you think I know that?” I muttered. “For one thing, my best friend is never coming back.”
“That's not Hadley's fault.”
Evan had a point. She didn't force Chris to become a police officer, that was something he'd been completely fired up to do. It wasn’t her fault that a raid had gone horribly wrong and he’d been killed in the line of duty.
Still, as irrational and unfair as I knew it to be, part of me did blame her. That part of me blamed her for taking him away to San Diego – a large city with more crime than we had here in Castle Creek. If he'd have only stayed put, he'd still be alive. Period.
“If she – ” I started to argue, but Mrs. Rose came back into the dining room, plates in hand and I shut my mouth without finishing my statement.
She was beaming proudly with her hands filled with plates of carrot cake. I stood up, taking some from her and passed them all around.
“Thank you, Gabriel. Always such a gentlemen,” Mrs. Rose said.
“My pleasure,” I said.
I followed her back into the kitchen, to help her with the remaining plates. Before we stepped back into the dining room though, she stopped me and fixed me with a penetrating stare. I stood rooted to my spot, curious about what was on her mind.
“I know Hadley broke your heart, but I've always liked you, Gabriel,” she said. “I do hope the two of you can reconcile and leave the past where it belongs.”
My jaw clenched tightly. “There's nothing to reconcile, Mrs. Rose,” I said. “The past is the past.”
“Please, we're all adults here, call me Shirley,” she said with a smile. “By the way, you're not seeing anyone, are you?”
“Not at the moment, no,” I said.
My fiancé, Jessica, and I had split up about six months ago. I'd called it all off when I realized she really was more in love with my money than me. Not to mention the fact that I found out she had a man on the side. It had been like a sledgehammer to the gut and I was beginning to think it was hard, if not impossible, to find a faithful woman. “Well, I hate to be pushy, but I think you and Hadley should get together sometime, reconnect,” she said. “I think it would be good for the both of you to heal and move forward.”
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “I don't want to sound rude or flippant, but I think that ship has sailed, Mrs. Rose – ”
“Shirley,” she corrected me with her bright smile and a playful tap on my nose.
“Alright then, Shirley,” I said, even though it felt weird to call her by her first name. Ever since I'd known her, she'd always been Mrs. Rose to me. “Like I said, I think that ship has sailed. Hadley and I are better off as friends, nothing more.”
She shook her head and shot me a look I couldn't quite read. Perhaps she was disappointed in my answer, or she just didn't believe me. Either way, I knew it was true. Truthfully, even being friends was a stretch. As much as I'd missed her all these years, there was still a lot of crap in our pasts. Crap I wasn't able to just forget about just because she happened to be single again.
“I remember a promise you made to my daughter,” Shirley said softly.
She didn't have to elaborate, I knew exactly what she meant. I stood there, my arms loaded up with plates.
“Well, I had intended on keeping my promise,” I muttered. “But, Hadley made other plans.”
I pushed open the swinging door between the dining room and kitchen, grateful to exit the conversation. I passed around the remaining plates, handing one to Hadley then putting one in front of Grayson too. The little boy looked up at me with big, brown eyes, watching everything I did. I smiled down at him, even though inside, it was killing me. He looked so much like Chris that it pained me to look at him sometimes.
Almost as much as it pained me to look at his mother.
***
“Hadley looked great,” Evan said later that night.
“Yeah, she did,” Jared agreed with him.
We were at my parent's house after dinner. It was just the three of us, sitting around and drinking Scotch after my parents had gone to bed. We were on the patio, enjoying the cool early summer breeze. Before long, it would get warmer, though thankfully not too warm here in Colorado. Given the fresh air and cool temperatures, this was my favorite time of year. Warmer days, less snow on the ground, and nights that still held a bit of crispness to them. It was one of the reasons I had no desire to leave the area, even though my business was booming in other parts of the world.
That, and of course, it would mean leaving my brothers. My family was the most important thing to me. It was rare that the three of us got together, all in one place, these days. We all had our own lives and our own careers going, but we stayed in touch with group texts and phone calls as much as we could and relished a time to get together like tonight. I didn't say anything, and I hoped the conversation would move beyond Hadley. I'd had enough and was on Hadley overload. I sipped my Scotch and stared out at the trees surrounding the property.
“Think she'd be interested in dating another Walker brother?” Jared teased.
My gaze flicked over to him, something like irritation flashing through me, and he noticed. He smirked at me in response. Everyone knew that Hadley was the One Who Got Away for me, even though I tried to deny that I still had any feelings at all for her.
“Why don't you ask her out sometime?” I responded dryly.
“Maybe I will,” Jared said. “Take her to the bar, show her a good time.”
“She doesn't strike me as a nightclub type of person anymore,” Evan said.
Jared shrugged. “She just needs to let loose a bit,” he said. “Needs a little motivation to step out of her mommy role.”
“Yeah. Good luck with that,” I said, focusing on my now almost empty glass.
I stood up and headed back inside for a refill while my brothers talked amongst themselves in hushed tones. They were trying to keep it down, but I still heard every damn word they said.
Evan was scolding Jared, “Man, you know he's still got feelings for her.”
“No, I don't,” I called out, glaring at them from the other side of the patio door. “Seriously, go for it, Jared. You too, Evan. If you think she's so hot, go for it. I'll personally congratulate the winner of this little game.”
“It's not a game,” Evan said. He stood and came toward me, shaking his head. “Hadley is Chris's wife. She has his kid. She deserves better than that.”
He was right. She did. I shook my head and continued making my drink. My parent's house had a nice mini bar in the living room, right beside the patio. I stopped there and poured another drink, filling my glass almost to the brim this time. All this talk of Hadley was driving
me to drinking. It had been a long time since my brothers goaded me about her – mostly because she'd been married. They also knew she was a sore spot with me and were usually kind about fucking with me.
“Listen, man,” Evan said, sidling up beside me and pouring himself another glass, “Jared doesn't mean the shit he's saying.”
“And I don't give a damn if he does,” I said.
Evan sighed. “Gabe, we all know you never got over her.”
“That's not true,” I countered. “I was engaged to Jessica for a while, wasn't I?”
“Yeah, after dating her for two whole months. We all knew that one wouldn't last,” he laughed. “You were just kidding yourself.”
My body stiffened. Jessica and I had seemed like we'd be perfect together – at least, we did on paper. Both of us were Ivy League grads. Both of us came from good families. She was beautiful, intelligent, sexy as hell – she was everything most men would want in a woman. She just wasn't Hadley. It had been too soon for me, and I'd moved too fast. An overreaction to the emotional ass-kicking I'd just taken.
Hadley had just married Chris and I’d realized my dreams of being with her were gone. Knowing that the dream was over, never to be revived again, I'd gone all in with Jessica. We'd hardly known each other when I first proposed to her, but it was a whirlwind of emotions that, at the time, felt a lot like love. Little had I know, she was only interested in my money and I was only interested in trying to numb the pain from the wound Hadley had inflicted upon me.
I took a long, hard swallow of the Scotch and walked back out toward the patio. No need to re-hash the past. Evan was right on my heels though, continuing to pepper me with questions.
“So how long has it been since you've dated anyone else?” he asked.
“I'm busy, with work,” I said. “I don't have time for dating.”
“Or is it because no one meets your impossibly high standards and expectations?” Evan said with a smirk.
Jared piped up, “No, it's because they aren't Hadley.”
