by Leia Stone
“I’m a little overwhelmed, to be honest.” Dizziness rocked through me, and I closed my eyes until the sensation of spinning passed. “Can we change the subject for now?”
“Definitely.” Nell got up and walked over to the far corner of the room and pulled a wheelchair from an alcove. Bringing the contraption back to the bed, she patted the seat. “The healer said you need lots of rare steak and rest, so let’s bust this sterile hellhole. Kaja and I will take turns playing nurse.”
I looked at my two new friends and smiled. “Thanks for being here. You don’t have to do all this.”
Nell waved her hand, “We begged you to come to the beach party, so I’m only doing it out of guilt. And you went looking for Kaja, so it’s practically her fault.”
We all laughed. I knew she was lying, but the generosity made my heart swell. These girls were gold, and I was lucky to have them.
Chapter 13
Kaja stirred the pot of cream of wheat, and I frowned, eyes still blurry from sleep. We were at my place, having spent yesterday evening holed up at hers while her sweet sisters waited on me hand and foot. Today was Monday, which meant class. Ugh. My blood loss earned me a pass for serving meals. However, without the work, I couldn’t eat at the cafeteria or snake breakfast at the coffee cart like I normally did. Kalama had just left my dorm after relaying the king’s message, only to have a package delivered within minutes of her leaving my doorstep.
“You said this stuff has fifty percent of my daily iron requirements?” I grimaced as she let a spoonful plop into the pot of hot cereal and then shook my head. “I’m not eating any of it, just so you know. I’m…” My gaze flitted over the groceries laid out on the counter. “Having pancakes…”
She chuckled. “You can have both.”
My stomach echoed her sentiments with a loud growl.
I ate the hot mushy cereal while Kaja cooked pancakes, my gaze drifting back to the mysterious box of fresh groceries. They’d arrived by official Midnight Pack messenger not even an hour ago. Pancake mix, eggs, steak, spinach, ice cream, the works. There was even a card, one I couldn’t stop staring at.
I picked up the heavy cardstock and flipped it over for the tenth time. “Get well soon –Mate.”
Mate.
The rumor of my injury had reached my mate, and now he was sending food boxes. All while he chose to keep his identity a secret and ignore me. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to kiss him or kill him.
Both.
Before I could think more on the box of food, Nolan sauntered into the kitchen. I snatched the card up and stuck it in my pocket.
My cousin was dressed in head-to-toe black, emo all the way down to his charcoal turtleneck. His hair still rumpled with sleep, he surveyed the room with the hungry look of a hyena.
Both Kaja and I froze.
Was he behind my attack? Maybe his fur had darkened, or been magically camouflaged, and I was wrong about his wolf. Because who in their right mind wore a turtleneck when it was eighty-five degrees out? It was way too hot, not to mention social suicide. Unless they were hiding something…
“Food,” he mumbled, reaching for the pancake stack.
Still holding the spatula, Kaja whacked his hand, making him yelp. “I don’t think so, assface.”
He glared at her and growled, letting his yellow wolf eyes come to the surface.
I gulped, glad that it looked like Kaja wasn’t letting him off the hook. I guess now was as good a time as any to do this.
“Why the turtleneck?” I asked my cousin. “It’s not winter.”
“Not even close,” Kaja growled. “And it looks horrible on you.”
Burn.
He glared from Kaja to me. “Why don’t you both mind your own damn business?”
Kaja growled, low and deep, and I could see her losing control over her wolf. “Did you hear about Nai’s attack?” Her words were barely coherent. “Aren’t you going to ask how your cousin is doing?”
Nolan crossed his arms. “Yeah, I heard she pissed off a wolf at the beach party and they got into it.” Waving at me, he said, “Obviously, she’s fine.”
Kaja took one step closer to him, holding up the completely useless plastic spatula as if it were a lightsaber. “Where were you during the party, Nolan?”
My muscles tightened, and I sighed, pushing myself out of my seat. Might as well get it all out there. I rounded to his other side just in case he bolted, trapping him in.
Nolan laughed, legit barked out in full-on laughter. “You think I attacked her?” When neither of us disputed it, his face went deadly serious. “There’s a time for contesting her future place as alpha. It’s not now.”
Okay. His not so thinly veiled threat made it sound like we were being absurd.
“You’ll never take the pack from me, Nolan.” My wolf surged to the surface with my declaration, fur rippling down my arms, and I had to force her back down.
Now she wanted to come out and play? What about when I was dying?
More important than the pissing match, he’d not given a direct answer or told me why he was wearing that stupid sweater. It was perfect for hiding a still-healing wound, and I’d damaged that wolf's throat. Sneaky as a rat.
“Answer the damn question or I’ll report my suspicions to the Midnight brothers. Then, where will you be?” At least he had the decency to pale when I spoke of them. “Where were you when I was attacked, Nolan?”
Nolan drew himself up to his full height, and his nostrils flared. “Screw you, Nai!”
He turned to leave, and I realized he wasn’t going to answer. But… that turtleneck! I had to know why he was covering his throat. Kaja must’ve been on the same wavelength because, when I lunged for him, she did the same. We both grabbed at his shirt, high on the collar, and tugged. The seam ripped, and Nolan spun.
The force of his movement threw me off balance, and I crashed into Kaja, both of us tumbling back into the row of cabinets.
“What the hell, psychos!” He waved his arms as he bellowed. “What is wrong with you?”
Oh. My. Mage.
I stared, unable to take my gaze from his neck, now fully exposed. I shook my head and glanced toward Kaja, who likewise stared, jaw gaping, at the bright, red … hickey.
Dammit.
“Oops,” I said lamely, wincing as I climbed to my feet.
“So… sorry. We, uh… slipped.” Kaja smiled and raced to the stack of golden pancakes. Holding a short stack of three on the spatula, she extended the peace offering. “Want one … or some? I heard it takes a lot of sucking to do that well—”
I snickered as he ripped the stack of pancakes from her and stormed out of the room.
“Well, there goes that theory,” I told Kaja.
She eyed the doorway Nolan had fled through. “I dunno,” she said, shaking her head. “His voice was raspy, and that hickey could be a magicked mark. I still don’t trust him.”
Yeah. Definitely not. He was sketchy as hell, but was he a killer?
Kaja checked her watch. “We have class in thirty minutes. Time to go.” She pointed to my left hand and said, “Better get Nell to cover that.”
Crap! My mark was slowly coming back. Hopefully, Nolan hadn’t seen it.
I nodded, grabbing two pancakes to munch on the way. “Thanks for all your help, girl.”
She put down the spatula and gave me a hug. “Just watch your back. I hope this was an isolated incident, but…”
Yeah. “You and me both.”
A half-hour later, I stepped into Fire Studies to find Rage already there, talking it up with the professor. The two of them stared at the giant, perfect fireball resting in Rage’s palm.
I hadn’t seen Rage since my near-death experience, or Justice for that matter, and I took a moment and stared at the beautiful boy who’d carried me from the beach to the hospital wing. My gaze flitted to the orange and red sphere and stayed.
Yep, I was one hundred percent done with this book-reading business.
&n
bsp; I marched up to the desk nearest where they stood and slammed the giant textbook down with a loud thwack. They both jumped, Rage far less than the professor, and then turned to me.
“I’ve read it,” I announced, grinning like a loon. “Front to back, three whole times. Now, teach me some magic.”
Rage’s eyes warmed as his gaze roamed over my face. Then, his attention slowly drifted down my body, and his eyes hardened into ice when he glanced at the fine scar on my arm.
Master Carn cleared his throat and looked to Rage, and I almost lost it when he—Prince Rage—nodded. Even the teachers took orders from him? The fireball in his hand dissipated, and then he said to the professor: “I’ll go practice in the back.”
Wasn’t he going to say a word to me?
We’d had that big fight where he admitted to hating me and all my pack for one wolf’s betrayal—which wasn’t even true—then I almost died, and he saved me, carrying me all the way to the castle. After all that history, all I got was a look? That man was infuriating. If I knew how to make fireballs, he’d be dodging them right now.
“I’ll be right back,” Master Carn said. “We need water.”
In case I set the building on fire?
Yikes.
With the professor gone, I refused to play Rage’s game. I crossed the room, but my steps slowed when he kept his back to me. I owed him a debt of gratitude even if he was a bastard. Reaching out, I grabbed his shoulder and tried to turn him toward me … to no avail.
Seriously?
“Hey … Rage!” I called, waving my hand in front of him. “I want to talk to you.”
He sighed, and I almost stomped off. But when he turned and faced me, my rehearsed speech evaporated, and my mouth dropped open, stunned by the emotion in his eyes. They were glittering with … rage.
“Yes?” he growled.
Why was he mad? At me? And now that I looked closer, he looked exhausted.
“Thanks…” I shook my head, trying to clear the shock, and then mumbled, “You know, for saving me.”
He nodded stiffly. “I take my charge over the safety of the alpha heirs seriously. It’s a job bestowed on me and one I need to prove worthy of if I want to rule someday.”
Oh. So that’s why he saved me.
“Okay…” I wasn’t sure where this was going anymore. “Well, why are you acting so pissed at me? Other than your usual hatred…?”
He clenched his jaw and forced a swallow before answering, his voice tight with fury. “I don’t hate you, Nai. I do wish you’d tell me if you have any inkling as to who attacked you. I want to make sure this island remains a safe haven.” The fire was back in his eyes. “For you—and all of the heirs.”
I wanted to tell him Nolan, but I was even less sure now after we’d talked this morning. And I was still 64.5% certain Rage would kill him. His coiled body seemed ready to attack.
“I wish I knew,” I said, lamely. “But I really don’t.”
Rage sighed, his eyes again falling to my injured arm. “Well, I’m… glad you're not dead.”
His halting words registered, and I grimaced. Wow. “That’s so sweet. They should hire you to write Valentine’s Day cards.”
I’d totally buy that. Not.
He rolled his eyes but said nothing.
“Okay, well, this was constructive,” I muttered, turning to flee this bizarre convo. I could take a hint.
Rage cleared his throat, making me pause before rubbing the sides of his temples.
“You’ll need to push the professors to train you. You’re here a year early, and they’re setting you up for failure by making you read books. If you don’t pass the practical mid-year exam, then you can’t come back to finish the rest of the year. You’ve got two and a half months to prep, so step it up.”
My eyes bugged, and I stepped toward him, seething. “What! They can do that?”
I’d assumed each year had some kind of practical elemental exam, but I didn’t know they could kick me out halfway through the year.
He nodded, stepping closer and bringing the scent of sandalwood with him. My heart flipped and then thumped against my ribs as if it could lurch me forward and close the gap.
“Time to be an alpha, Nai.” He growled: “Demand what you want. You need practical lessons every day or you’ll never be ready for the test.”
I swallowed hard and nodded, again noticing how tired he looked. “You okay? You look exhausted.”
He was silent a moment before his gaze dipped to my lips, “I was up late.”
And then he left the room.
Just like that.
I wiped my mouth just to make sure I didn’t have pancake crumbs leftover from breakfast, or maybe drool. Nope. All good on that. I shook my head, certain I’d never figure that man out, but not gonna lie, watching his cute butt leave a room wasn’t half bad. I only hoped ‘up late’ wasn’t code for hooking up with a girl because, as much as I didn’t want to admit it, I’d care if he did.
At least the eye candy partially made up for his winning personality.
The cool night air was perfect for exploring the forest. I stared up into the sky, smiling when the clouds scuttled away from the white sliver of the crescent moon hanging in the darkness. Another week down, and Saturday had arrived. Specifically, Saturday at 8 p.m. All the conditions were perfect, and still, my wolf refused to rise to the surface. She perceived Honor as a threat. Not that he would ever hurt me, but his presence with the intention to provoke my wolf made her uneasy, and she stayed put—the opposite of what she should do.
“Can you feel her here?” Honor asked, tapping his chest.
We stood behind my dorm, at the edge of the woods, for our first class of “Help Nai Shift 101.” So far, we’d had zero success, which was to say I was still human even after he’d waved a knife in my face.
At least, Honor wasn’t rubbing my failure in my face by shifting back and forth. Pushing away the painful memory of my one lesson with Nolan from years ago, I sucked in a deep, cleansing breath.
Pine and mulch. Loamy earth and verdant growth. Sandalwood and sage.
‘Mate.’
My eyes popped open, and I scanned the tree line. My skin prickled with anticipation, and my wolf surged forward. I took another breath, but then his scent was gone.
Just like that, my wolf retreated. She’d been like this ever since the attack. Hesitant.
“She’s there,” I said, patting my chest. “But also here,” and I patted my temple. “She doesn’t want to come out for you.”
Running through the woods? Sure, no problem. But my wolf was not a beck and call kinda girl. Not for me, my father, and apparently, not for Honor. The urge to ask if he knew who my mate was burned at the tip of my tongue, but if I disclosed I was half of the fated-mate pair, would I reveal a secret my mate kept from his brothers? Of all the green-eyed boys at this school … I was sure in my bones it was one of the Midnight brothers, most likely Justice or Rage.
Honor cocked his head. “What do you mean, ‘she?’”
His question pulled me back to the lesson, and I held my hand out to stop what would surely follow. “I know, I know. ‘She’ is me.”
My father said the same thing. In fact, every wolf-shifter I knew felt the same. The wolf was merely the embodiment of the animalistic instinct of their ‘human.’
But that’s not how I felt.
Honor limped closer. “Then why did you say she?”
How could I explain without sounding insane?
“I know we’re one and the same as far as beings, and most of the time, it feels that way.” Not completely true, but the best I could come up with. “However, whenever I’m in peril or under pressure—” I pursed my lips and shrugged “—she steps back, freezes up as if she thinks my human form is more powerful.”
“That’s not good,” Honor stated just like every other wolf shifter who’d discovered my secret. “Are you sure she freezes up?”
“I don’t know how else to expla
in it.” I crossed my arms over my chest, frowning.
He chuckled. “There are shifters who fight their instincts as they get older, and some even say they can control whether or not they shift. But what you’re saying…” He shook his head. “Our wolf is physically stronger than our human body, so when it comes to physical danger, the instinct to shift is almost impossible to stop.”
Almost impossible wasn’t the same as impossible. And it didn’t matter what everyone else did or didn’t do. I could only speak for myself. “You’re not telling me anything I haven’t heard before.”
“All right,” Honor said. “Then tell me what it’s like for you. When that wolf attacked you, you didn’t have any…drive or push to shift?”
“I wanted to, but I couldn’t.”
He shook his head, and I reached back to a conversation I’d had with my father, years ago, to try and explain.
“You know that feeling of presence as you shift, and I mean just before your instinct takes over and your rational mind goes away, that few seconds when both the human rational side and wolf instinct coexist in the same space at the same time?”
Honor stared at me, his gaze piercing. “That’s like a millisecond.”
I snorted. “Not for me.”
“You mean you can still think and rationalize even when you’re in your wolf form?”
“Yep.”
He shook his head. Again. But it wasn’t in a disrespectful way. He looked … amazed. “I’ve never heard of anything like that.”
His words prickled my skin. Dammit. I’d said too much. Revealed too much. What if he told the alpha king? I grabbed his arm.
“Please don’t tell anyone. The last thing I need is more scrutiny for being different. Everyone already treats me like a freak for having two affinities.” I straightened, dropping his arm, and gave him an apologetic smile. “Maybe that’s why. Maybe my two affinities are stronger than my wolf.”
I was grasping for straws, but the pity in his expression twisted my insides. There had to be a reasonable explanation for this.
He pulled me in for a hug, surprising me. “Maybe. But I need you to be able to shift and defend yourself. We just want you to be safe, and I would never tell anyone your secret.”
