by Natasha West
Just Married?
By
Natasha West
Copyright © 2019 by Natasha West
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
One
Emily Bartlett, teacup halfway to her lips, paused and looked at her fiancée, Katie, with confusion. ‘I beg your pardon?’
Katie licked her lips and glanced at the waiter as he passed. Once he was out of earshot, she repeated her earlier statement. ‘I said… I’ve met someone else.’
Emily realised tea was spilling from the cup, now dangling, forgotten. She put it down quickly, her wrist wet. She still couldn’t understand those four words any better on the repeat. ‘No. You’ve lost me. Who’ve you met?’ she said, dabbing at her wrist with a napkin.
Katie pressed a hand to her temple, rubbing at it like she had a headache. ‘I’m saying, I’ve met somebody else. Like, someone else. You know what that means. Everyone knows what that means.’
Emily supposed she understood what was commonly meant by the phrase. If she’d been watching this happen on TV, she’d have grasped the situation perfectly. But the words were being spoken by the person she’d been engaged to for two years, together for three and a half. They weren’t supposed to be ‘Meeting’ other people. Emily was meant to be the last person Katie would ever ‘Meet.’
‘Is this a joke?’ Emily asked, grasping at straws. If it was, it was not even slightly funny. But better a bad joke than the alternative.
‘No, Em. Sorry.’ Katie took a deep breath. ‘So the thing is, I’m going to move out tomorrow.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous’ Emily said with a light chuckle. ‘We’ve got a Tesco delivery booked for tomorrow. Between eleven and three.’
Katie shook her head at the table and then looked back up, her face devoid of warmth. Only a determination to get through this conversation. Emily knew then it was true. She was being left.
‘Emily. Please hear me. This is happening. I’ll cancel the delivery’ Katie said roughly.
‘I’m just saying, why would you sit with me and decide on a bunch of meals and put all the stuff into the basket and put the payment through if you weren’t going to be here to eat any of it?’ Emily knew it was a bit silly to get into these details when your life had just fallen apart but it was all she had left. So it mattered.
‘Emily-’
‘Seriously. We did this two days ago. Two days. So when have you met someone? Yesterday?’
‘Six months ago’ Katie said quietly.
Emily exploded with laughter. ‘Six months! Six months. Six months’ she said, trying out the various intonations. ‘You met someone six months ago. So then what happened? After this meeting?’
Katie coughed into her hand. ‘I don’t see any point going into detail.’
Emily’s eyes narrowed. ‘You’re saying you’ve been…’
‘Yes’ Katie said, looking at the table.
A waiter showed up. ‘Can I get you guys anything? Got some great brownies in today.’
Emily was still swirling through a torrent of emotions, but she turned with astonishing politeness and said, ‘Actually, do you think we could just have five minutes?
The waiter gave a nod and vanished, bless his discretion. Emily turned to her beloved and said, ‘Why?’
‘Why what?’
‘There’s a million whys’ Emily said with an angry shrug. ‘Pick one and answer it.’
Katie sighed. ‘I haven’t been happy for a while.’
‘Right. But rather than talk about it, you just started looking for someone else’ Emily said, folding her arms across her chest.
‘It wasn’t like that. I didn’t look. As such.’
‘No? So how did you meet this someone?’
Katie hesitated. ‘Work.’
Emily’s nostrils flared. ‘It’s Alison, isn’t it?’
Katie didn’t answer.
‘What was it you said to me a few months ago when I said you were hanging with her out a lot? Ah yes, that was it. ‘She’s just a friend.’ Emily arched an eyebrow while she considered the last six months, now through a very different lens. ‘You know what’s funny? I didn’t even actually think you were cheating. I just thought maybe you fancied her. I got jealous, yes. But I never really thought you’d do this to me. For six months’ Emily said in a flat tone. It was curious to her how removed she was beginning to feel from this. She supposed that was shock. She should have been screaming, crying, something. Instead, she was going at this like she was finding out her favourite chocolate bar was being taken off the shelves. Peeved, but not a lot more.
And she wasn’t the only one that had noticed. ‘I’ve got to say, you’re being very calm about this’ Katie said.
‘Yes, I know. I presume that’s why you decided to tell me this in public? Why you just dropped in at the place I come to every Friday for lunch, no notice. I can’t believe I was pleased to see you. I thought it was a sweet gesture. Can you imagine?’ she said, amused. ‘You were just trying to avoid ugliness. Because you know I’m not one for public scenes, don’t you?’
‘No one likes ugliness, do they?’ Katie said defensively.
‘No, I suppose not. But I rather think you owed me a scene, don’t you? Just as some sort of penance. Since you’re destroying my life and everything.’
‘I’m not destroying your life’ Katie wheedled. ‘Or not forever. This must hurt but it’s only temp-’
‘Stop talking now, Katie’ Emily said firmly. She never talked to Katie like this, giving her short shrift. She was usually the one asking for kindness, compassion. This was almost fun. Almost. ‘I don’t need you to tell me that what you’re doing isn’t all that bad. It’s bad. It’s really bad’ Emily said quietly with a flash of her eyes.
‘Then why aren’t you more upset?’ Katie asked.
‘I don’t know. I’m sure I will be at some point’ Emily said, and she waved the waiter over. ‘I’ll have that brownie you were talking about. And some tea. Thanks.’
‘And for you?’ the guys said, turning to Katie.
Katie shook her head. ‘Oh, I’m not staying. Thanks.’
‘Places to be?’ Emily asked. She realised something. ‘She’s waiting for you, isn’t she?’
Katie had the good grace to blush.
‘Is she nearby?’
‘Parked around the corner’ Katie admitted.
‘Perhaps I’ll have a word with her’ Emily said, almost to herself. ‘There might be some admin to do in the handover. She won’t know about your allergy to soy or that you take two sugars in your tea or that you like to be taken from behind with a strap-on. Oh, wait, she’d know that last one, wouldn’t she?’
Katie was bright red now. ‘Emily, please don’t make this any harder.’
‘That’s not what you said when I had the strap-on.’
‘Oh Jesus’ Katie moaned.
‘Let me just ask you something before you go. Was it me?’
‘Emily-’
‘No, I don’t mean that in a self-deprecating way. I mean, what was it that made you unhappy? Call it academic interest.’
Katie looked like she wasn’t at all sure about going down this path but spoke anyway. ‘I
t was the routine.’
‘Routine.’
‘Yes. You like everything to run on time. Everything has to be clean, organised. I had to be clean and organised. And I’m not. I need to be able to make a mess. There was never room for that. Never room for spontaneity.’
Katie’s words stabbed Emily in the heart like a scalpel, precise and sharp. She knew there was truth in them. She liked order. But she’d somehow come to believe that Katie liked that about her. That she liked Emily tidying up after her, making appointments for her, arranging social occasions, steering her life. Because she’d never said otherwise. She’d just reaped the benefits. Until now. One minute she was saying, ‘Thanks for washing my gym gear. I thought I was gonna have to go in smelly stuff!’ Or, ‘When is my dentist’s appointment again?’ Or, ‘Did you text my sister about Sunday?’ And now she was saying, ‘I need to make a mess’ and ‘There was never room for spontaneity.’
‘Well, you’ve certainly achieved those goals today’ Emily said eventually. ‘Are you going to move in with her?’
‘Yeah’ Katie said, a little less rueful now she’d confessed all the big stuff.
‘Tomorrow. You’re gonna come over to our, sorry, my place, get your stuff and take it straight to hers? That the plan?’ Emily asked with casual interest.
‘No. I’m sending a guy with a van’ Katie told her. ‘Actually, I was hoping you might put a few things in bags for me?’
Emily gave a snort. ‘So now you want me to pack for you?’
‘Just my clothes. You’re better at that stuff than me anyway.’
‘Thanks. That means a lot’ Emily told her dryly.
‘Look, I thought it would be a cleaner break if I didn’t come ‘round myself. The guy can find my vinyl and stuff. I’ll let him know where it is. You can keep the things we bought together.’
‘What the whole shoe rack?’ Emily asked. She’d bought everything else with her when they’d moved in. Every sofa, every lamp, every cushion, every spoon. Katie had practically walked in with the clothes on her back. ‘The things you own, end up owning you’ she’d said at the time. Emily had pretended not to know it was a Fight Club quote.
‘I’ll give him the keys’ Katie continued, putting her coat on. ‘He can leave them behind when he goes.’
‘Right. Seems you’ve thought of everything. Did you think of how I’m going to cover your half of the rent?’
‘Of course I did, I’m not a monster. I’m sure it won’t be hard to get a flatmate. But you’re payed up ‘til the end of the month, anyway. You’ll have a few weeks to figure that out.’
‘Yes. What fun. Living with a stranger. Can’t say I ever thought I’d be doing that again.’
Katie pressed her lips into a thin smile. ‘I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I think this is better for both of us.’
‘Nope’ Emily answered plainly. ‘Just for you.’
Katie took out her purse and put a fiver on the table. ‘For your brownie.’
‘So generous. Alison really is getting a prize’ Emily said darkly.
Katie stood and looked down at Emily. Then she gave a small nod and she was gone.
The brownie arrived with a pot of tea and Emily calmly poured herself a cup and bit into the brownie. The waiter was right. It was nice. It was a shame that the taste of brownie would now forever be linked to cowardice, betrayal and a shattered life.
After it was finished, she left, got in her car and drove home. She rang her brother on the way home.
‘Phil, I need the afternoon off’ she told him. They both worked in the family bookshop. Their parents had retired a few years ago, leaving the place to their kids. But Phil, as the older Bartlett sibling, had been appointed manager.
‘What, why?’
‘I’ll explain later.’
‘But I’ve got all those bloody boxes to go through this afternoon. What’s the emergency?’
‘I…’ Emily nearly told him the truth but was suddenly overcome with embarrassment. ‘I broke a tooth on a muffin.’
‘What the hell was in the muffin? Gravel?’ Phil asked.
‘So can I see you Monday?’ Emily asked.
‘Fine. But you’re opening up’ he warned and hung up.
Back at the flat, Emily walked in and looked at the place as though it were new. Hers and Katie’s place, small but cosy. Lived in together, loved in together. But there would be no more love in this place now.
Emily went to the bedroom and into the wardrobe, getting a suitcase out of the bottom and throwing it open on the bed. She looked at Katie’s side of the wardrobe. It was all hoodies and jeans. Emily’s side was full of more preppy stuff. Trousers, shirts, jumpers. She’d have more room for her things now.
Emily pulled out one of Katie’s hoodies and went to put it into the case. But as she got close, her hand seemed to jump of its own accord and the hoodie landed on the floor. Emily looked down at it and thought, ‘Close enough.’ She pulled out the rest of Katie’s things and they soon joined the hoodie in a large pile. This man with a van would have a bigger job than he realised.
Emily looked at her own side of the wardrobe, now so lonely. She sighed and turned to the suitcase, meaning to zip it back up and put it away. But she didn’t do that.
What she did instead was turn around and grab ahold of five coat-hangers worth of her own stuff and placed it into the suitcase. Then she grabbed another armful and folded the lot in carefully. After that, she went to her underwear drawer and pulled out handfuls of knickers and bras. In the corner of the now half empty drawer was her passport. She took that out and put it into her pocket.
She zipped up the case and heaved it off the bed, carrying it down the hall. She left it at the door. Then she went back into the flat and began to turn off all the plugs, check the cooker hobs were off. She collected a few paperbacks from the shelf in the living room, without looking to see what they were. Once that was all done, she took a piece of paper from the pad stuck to the fridge. She jotted a quick note.
Once that was done, she ordered an uber. It was due in three minutes.
She went back down the hall, grabbed the case and unlocked the door, locking it behind her. She glanced at the note before she poked it into the post-box, half hanging out. She hoped the van man would pass it on to its intended recipient. It read;
Katie. I’m going away. Spontaneously. Your shit’s on the floor. I’m done looking after you.
And she went downstairs to wait for the car. It arrived quickly, and Emily put her bag in the boot and got in. ‘Where we going then? Heathrow airport is it?’ the bearded guy asked her. ‘That’s gonna cost about a hundred and twenty’ he told her.
‘That’s fine’ Emily said. A taxi all the way from her home in Oxford to Heathrow was not the usual. Any normal day, she’d have taken a train. But this was no normal day.
‘Going anywhere nice?’ the man asked as he pulled off.
‘Absolutely no idea’ Emily told him.
***
At the airport, Emily took a fifty pence coin and readied it in her fingers. She narrowed her choice to two continents, America and Australia, places she’d always wanted to visit. But Katie was permanently broke, which had prevented extravagant holidays. Well, that had just stopped being an issue. The coin was flipped and came down heads, USA. Another coin toss took her to the left side of the country rather than the right. The choice then became two locations that were on the departure board, leaving within the hour. Las Vegas or San Francisco. She got Vegas. She wasn’t at all sure that was somewhere she wanted to go but that was the point of this. She wasn’t overthinking. The coin would do the work.
She went to the desk and bought a return flight to Vegas, coming back in two days. She’d just about make it to open the shop Monday.
She passed through customs with her shoes in her hands and came through the other side, starting to worry if she’d forgotten anything important. But what could be important now? There was no one and nothing to worry about b
ut herself, her passport and a change of knickers. Anything else was surplus to requirements.
In the departure lounge, Emily went on a hotel booking app and selected a room in Vegas, at a casino/hotel called The Onyx. It was apparently right in the centre of the action.
She boarded her plane some time later and it wasn’t until the plane had been disconnected from the big tubing and it was taxiing down the runway that Emily realised what she’d done. She’d been right when she told Katie that she was sure she’d be upset later. She’d thought that would come in the form of tears. But instead, she was on a plane. This was the form her breakdown was taking. A ten-hour flight to the other side of the world.
