by Dylan Allen
“Please stop exaggerating. He just gave me tickets to the show. I don’t have any expectations.”
“What’s the point of living if you don’t expect anything from life, Beth?”
I slip on the stack of bracelets I only take off to shower and for work. “ I’m just managing my expectations. I’m hopeful, but he’s leaving for his tour tomorrow.”
“Yeah, I get that … but we can’t help it, can we? You and me. We’re romantics - expectations are in our blood.”
I sit down on the bed with her and can’t repress my smile. “So…is that what you call what you’re doing with Jack? Romantic?”
She scowls. “No, I hate him. But he’s so hot, and I can’t keep my hands off him. But…no, he’s a pain in my ass.”
“Yeah, well, that means he’s probably your soul mate. Easy love only exists in fairytales. That’s where Prince Charming lives, too.”
“Uh-uh. Your Prince jumped out of the pages of your fairy tale, and he’s riding in on a white horse, and holding out a hand to you. You should take it.”
“Oh my God, you’re so dramatic. I’m just taking it as it comes.”
“Like you took his dick against that door today,” she waggles her eyebrows and I laugh even though I know I shouldn’t.
“Porhsaaaaa…Everyone heard!” I moan and flop back onto the bed, staring at the ceiling as I recall my walk of shame out of there. She lays down next to me.
“My boss wouldn’t look me in the eye when she fired me. And I’m not even upset. I think I was using that job as crutch. Maybe the reckless sex was self-sabotage, you know so that I’d be forced to at least try to focus on painting full time.”
Porsha hums like she’s considering my very deep thought. “Or….what’s more likely is that you’re just an exhibitionist who’s finally found someone to live her fantasy out with. Oooh, maybe our wedding can be a voyeur wedding. You two shag instead of kiss after you exchange vows.”
I smack her with a pillow, and she snorts a laugh.
“You’re talking about weddings…we haven’t even gone on a date.” I sigh, happily imagining my first date, full- fledged and real with Carter,
“Can I tell you something?” I ask her after a stretch of comfortable silence.
“When has the answer to that question ever been anything but yes. I look forward to the day that you just tell me without asking first,” she says.
“I feel so stupid saying it, but… when he handed me that envelope in my office, my first thought was that it was a plane ticket for tomorrow. How dumb, right?” I open one eye to look at her when she doesn’t respond.
She’s watching me with the biggest smile on her face and I quirk my lips in surprise.
“Why are you looking at me like I just tied my shoelaces by myself for the first time?”
“Because I’m so glad you still have those kinds of dreams,” she says and her eyes mist over with tears and she brushes one away. A surge of tenderness washes over me and I wrap an arm around her.
“Don’t cry. I’ll cry, too. And I don’t have time to redo my face.”
She gives me a tremulous smile and shakes her head. “I’m so proud of you. The way you picked yourself up after everything.”
“Well, you’ve done the same thing. And you got your application in, right?”
Her smile dims a little. “Yeah. We’ll see. I wish I’d done it sooner. But, I’m glad I did. I don’t regret leaving medical school. I miss my mom. But, I can’t make her talk to me.”
“She’ll come around…and in the meantime, you have Jack,” I say with a waggle of my eyebrows.
“Let’s not go there tonight,” she groans, but she’s smiling and, her tears clearing away.
“Yes, not tonight. Tonight is going to be amazing.” I hop off the bed and gesture at my skintight jeans and the skimpy practically backless top she talked me into wearing. “Do I look okay?”
“Girl, you look like a fucking snack. He’s going to eat you alive.” She gives me a roguish grin.
I shiver at the thought and slip my feet into the sexy silver sling backs with the four-inch heel that I wore the night of the award ceremony. I’m just spritzing on some perfume when the doorbell rings.
“Since when does Uber ring the doorbell?” Porsha asks.
“I haven’t ordered our Uber yet.” I walk over to my bedroom window and peek outside. There’s a black Cadillac Escalade parked at the curb in front of my house. And the first thing I think is that my father has found me. My heart lodges in my throat, but I try to keep my face neutral
“Hmm. I’ll go—” I turn to an empty room and hear Porsha’s scream from our living.
I run down the short hallway of my apartment and skid to a stop when I her standing in front of our open door, holding a bouquet of flowers so big that it completely obscures her face.
“What’s going on?” I demand and then lean around her to peer at the man standing in our doorway. He’s huge and nearly fills the entire doorway. He’s dressed in all black and wearing sunglasses even though it’s dark now.
“He sent flowers, Beth,” she squeals the obvious and thrusts the huge bouquet at me.
I take them but put them down to question the man who brought them.
“Who brought flowers? Who sent you?” I ask him sharply.
“My name’s Tony. Mr. Bosh sent me to escort you and your friends to the show tonight.” He speaks with barely moving lips. How fascinating…
“You came for me? Because Carter sent you?” I ask him, saying each word slowly to make sure I didn’t misunderstand.
“Yes, ma’am. I’ll drive you and your guests to the venue and make sure you find your seats,” he says in a clipped monotone.
“Oh my God! And he sent a fucking carriage!” Porsha squeals and We link hands and giggle like preteens. My heart is off on a wild gallop. The lasso I had wrapped around my expectations comes flying off and they take off, too.
Tonight, I’m going to take everything the world hands me, and wear it like a technicolor coat of dreams.
“I’ll wait by the car, come down when you’re ready,” Tony says.
“Oh, I’m ready. Right now.” I grab my purse and my keys and walk hand in hand with my best friend toward my destiny.
I Want to Sing to You
CARTER
“So, does she know you were at her wedding?” Dean asks from his perch on my desk.
“God, I’m sorry I told you that story,” I mutter and do one more push-up before I let my completely spent arms rest.
“Why? It’s a fucking great story.”
I shoot him an irritated glance in the mirror. “Yeah, it’s great that I sat in the back pew of a church ready to watch my girl get married.”
He shrugs.“My wife was married before. Shit happens. Life throws us curveballs. But you’ve got your chance now and you’re taking it. So, yeah it’s a great fucking story. It’s how you got here. Your fans will eat it up.”
“I hope she does, too,” I don’t know how Beth is going to feel about this kind of attention.
But, I’m going to ask her for a lot so I’m wrapping it around a gesture I hope will show her how serious I am.
“Well, Milly’s going to die when I tell her you’re finally going for it. She’s slightly obsessed with yours and Beth’s story. I’m glad we could make this show.”
“Yeah, me too. Are her parents here, too?”
“Oh yeah. They wouldn’t miss it.” He stands up and walks over to where I’m sitting and puts a hand on my shoulder.
“You’re going to do good, kid. I know this is a big deal. But, you’ve been talking about this girl since the day I met you. You’ve been wanting this chance even longer. This is it. Go big or go home.”
The set is ending. It’s been an incredible show; the audience has screamed along with every song. The band and I have been in sync like crazy, improvising like motherfuckers. It’s almost been like we’ve just been playing one of our jam sessions where we just decide to fuck the
planned set and have a good time.
And with every costume change, I’ve stolen a moment with Beth.
She’s sitting in the special seats we keep for VIPs at the side of the stage. My whole family is here. When we started planning for tonight, Beth wasn’t back in my life. I can’t believe how much has changed in just a few short months.
It’s been amazing to have her eye to catch when I’m singing her songs.
It’s time for the final number and it’s just going to be me and on my piano.
I’m going for broke and hoping I can show her and everyone who’s watching just how much I love her and always have.
“Hey Brooklyn,” I call out to the crowd as I adjust my microphone and try to get comfortable. The crowd roars back its approval and I shoot them a smile that makes them scream even louder.
No matter how many nights we do this, getting on stage, especially with a crowd this big, takes swallowing down fear. Some nights, it also takes a hit of weed.
But, by the end of the show, I’ve sweated out my anxiety, I’ve bled my heartache, rebel yelled my triumph and left it all on the stage.
Tonight though, when I sit down at my piano, I’m still very aware of how many eyes are on me. I feel like it’s my very first time on stage and my nerves are in overdrive. I close my eyes, count to five and when I open them, I focus on the woman who I’m here for, and start talking.
“I have a special guest here tonight,” I tell the crowd as I pick out a few notes on the piano. “You guys know all the words to the album, Between Now and Heartbreak. So you already know how I feel about her. Every word I wrote was about that woman over there.”
The crowd cheers, wildly. The stage lighting shifts and drops a beam right over her and surrounds her in a full-body halo. She looks so fucking beautiful. The camera that projects the performance onto the huge screens moves to her and the crowd goes crazy.
Her big blue eyes widen and she looks around her in alarm, like she’s not sure who I’m talking about.
Then she drops her face into her hands. I can’t tell if she’s laughing or crying, but whichever I hope it’s out of happiness.
“I love you, Beth. Tonight, I want to sing you a new song. One that ends with Always. I hope you don’t mind if I share a little of our story with everyone here. ’Cause loving you is the reason we’re all here at all.”
She shakes her head with her hands still covering her eyes.
“Open your eyes, baby, I want you to see what I see,” I coax softly, just to her.
She hesitates for a beat, but then she slides her hands off her face slowly and looks at me.
The moment our eyes lock, the rest of the world falls away, and it’s just the two of us and my piano.
Like it was the first time we fell in love.
“When I met you, I was lost…fighting demons, trying to figure out where I belonged. Then, you came along. Just like the moon and the stars gift the midnight sky night with light, you made me come alive. It’s because of you I decided to sing for the rest of the world. We’ve been pulled apart more times than I can count. But what we’ve got isn’t something mere men can destroy. A devil like me has no business in heaven, but that a woman like you loves me, even now, when I have no right to that love, has been my saving grace. I want the world to know, It’s you my heart calls queen. If you’ll have me, I don’t want anything more than I want you to be mine.”
The crowd roars their approval and Beth wipes away a tear that rolls down her cheek.
She presses her lips together, and her chin wobbles, but she nods.
“Come sit with me, I want to sing to you,” I ask and she nods again, and I stand up and walk over to get her.
She watches me with eyes the size of saucers but holds her hand out for me to grab. I pull her into a hug and she wraps her arms around my waist and presses her head to my chest. Her shirt is backless and I run my hand down from the base of her neck to her waist and remind myself that tonight, I’m going to have all of her.
I bend my head to her ear, “Thank you for coming.”
“Wild horses couldn’t have kept me away. But, everyone can see me,” she shouts in my ear.
“Lucky them,” I respond and then walk us back onto the stage. I sit down at the piano and pull her down next to me. She looks up at the huge screen, sees us and drops her face against my shoulder.
“So guys, this is Beth. She’s only woman I’ve ever loved and the person who saved me when I was in a pit that was so dark I couldn’t see a way out. And the first time I kissed her, my whole world changed.” I press my lips to her. It’s just a quick touch, but it hits me square in my chest when I think how close we were to losing this.
I tap out the first few keys and she looks up at me her eyes wide with surprise and soft with tenderness.
“Oh my God. You’re going to make me cry in front of all these people.”
I press my lips to her ear cover my mike. “It’s only fair. The songs I wrote about you made them cry, too.” Then, with my girl pressed to my side, my fingers do what they were born to.
I don’t look anywhere but her eyes while I sing the words of the song that’s tattooed all over the memories of our time together. I promise her that between now and our forever, I’ll never take her for granted. That from now on, we don’t go anywhere if it’s not together. That I’ll take care of her as long as she’ll let me.
It’s only when I play the last note, that I realize the stadium is so quiet, you could hear a pin drop.
I’m a crooner. I write and sing emotional songs. But I’ve never really shared more than superficial pieces of myself with my audience. I give them what they come for—great music that lets them get lost for a while. Maybe it was too much to share so publicly.
I turn back to Beth and cover my mic. “You okay?”
She nods. “You’ve never sounded more beautiful than you did just now, Carter. If my heart wasn’t already irrevocably yours, that would have done it.”
Then she leans in, cups the back of my neck and presses a kiss to my mouth. I forget the crowd’s reaction or lack of one instantly.
She loved it. She’s who I was singing for. That’s all I wanted. I cup her waist and slide her across the few inches separating us and kiss her back. That seems to break whatever spell the crowd is under and they erupt, so loud that their roar vibrates across the stage.
Then I remember this is still my job and we’ve got to close the show. She sits beside while we do our outro. Letting the band sign off and thanking the crowd and then we all head backstage where her friends are already waiting.
We mingle, she introduces me to her friends and I introduce her to Dean and his wife, Milly. I try to make sure she’s in touching distance the whole time. She said yes to me in front of a huge crowd, I kind of put her on the spot. I want to talk to her in private, make sure she’s saying yes because she wants what I’m offering and not because she had thousands of people watching her.
We get separated when our tour manager takes me and the rest of the band to the meet and greet we sold as part of the VIP ticket package.
I spend the next hour taking pictures and signing autographs for fans who paid for the experience. When I head back to our dressing rooms, the common area is deserted.
My stomach does a small flip. She wouldn’t have left without telling me, I know she wouldn’t have. My phone is in my dressing room so I head that way and pray that I’ll be able to find her fast.
As I approach, I can hear the sound of the piano being played in the room. That piano is strictly off limits to everyone. Even my bandmates.
I fling the door to the room open, and pause when I’m met by darkness.
“Who he hell is in here?” I fumble along the wall until I find the light switch, and turn it on. The sight that greets me sends all the blood rushing to my dick.
Beth is sitting at my piano, naked. Her body is a portrait of sensual perfection, all elegant lines and mouthwatering curves. And all mine.
She turns to look at me. Her smile is all innocence, but the heat in her eyes is like a blinking neon sign that says,“This way for a fuck of your life.”
I swallow hard. “I’ve been looking for you.”
“I’ve been here…That was an incredible show, I’m in awe of you,” she says, one thumb strokes the piano keys, the other plucks at one of her plump, pebbled nipples.
“Wh—What are you doing?” I have to clear my parched throat to get the words out.
“Isn’t it obvious? I’m waiting for you,” she says, and turns so her legs straddle the bench, putting her glisten pussy on display.
“You’re playing my piano.”
“I was just touching it,” she says, sucking her fingers into her mouth, one at a time and then trailing them down the center of her chest, down the flat of her stomach, and then between her thighs. She slips two fingers inside of herself and starts stroking and thrusting.
She rocks her hips, smearing the wet of her pussy on my piano bench and I pull my dick out and stroke it in long languid pull while I watch her.
“You’re not going to make me wait any longer, are you?” she asks.
I pull my shirt over my head, and step out of my jeans as my answer.
I walk over to the piano and kneel between her legs, watching her hand, closely.
“Do you want to make yourself come?” I ask.
“No,” she breathes.
I pull her hand out of her and lick her fingers before I lay it down on her side.
I press my palms to the insides of her thighs and spread them until she’s completely unfolded. I gaze at the pink perfection, my most coveted possession and inhale the sweet musk of her desire. Then, I lean in, and run my tongue over her clit, and then down until I find her honey coated entrance and push up into her, as deep as I can
Her hips rock up and her hands grab hold of my shoulders and the keys of the piano make a discordant clanging sound that draws my eyes upward. She leaned back, her elbows are on the keys, her head is thrown back and she’s panting.
I throw her legs over my shoulders and pull her clit into my mouth and suck her hard.
