His hard stared pierced me across the distance separating us. Then he sighed loudly. “Doesn’t matter, anyway. I’ll be dead soon.” He spoke with such conviction that a shiver rippled through me. He truly believed he was going to die.
My heart twisted painfully. Jacob didn’t deserve to be in chains. To be in this cell. He didn’t deserve any of this.
He could have easily hurt me a moment ago. He could have easily killed me. Yet he hadn’t. The knowledge reaffirmed my earlier belief that he would never hurt me. He thought I’d betrayed him, but he still hadn’t harmed me. In my mind, that proved he was a good person, no matter what he’d done in the past. That showed he had true character, decency. Humanity. I’d seen the true Jacob. I knew him better than I’d thought. Through his actions. I’d witnessed his gentleness, his caring with Hazel. And with me. He might not have told me much about himself, but I’d seen who Jacob was these past two weeks. I knew he was good.
And I sensed from his reaction to my supposed betrayal that he felt things deeply. I’d hurt him without intending to. Pain squeezed my heart. Oh Jacob, I’m so sorry.
Before I lost my nerve, I found myself crawling toward him, wanting to comfort him. I was the reason he was in this cell. I was the reason he’d been captured by this gang. Because I’d unwittingly led him into danger.
He watched me as I came closer, but he didn’t move. Didn’t speak. At last I reached him, and knelt in front of him, looking into his eyes. I reached for his hands, taking them in mine. He flinched, the chains rattling. Something flickered in his eyes, barely discernible in the dark, but he didn’t pull away.
“I will prove my innocence to you, Jacob. And that’s a promise. I know I can’t do it with words, so somehow, someway, I will show you with actions.”
He swallowed hard, the sound audible in the small cell. He wasn’t as unaffected by my presence as he pretended. Maybe he did care about me. At least a little. Maybe the connection between us, the strong attraction was more than just physical. I know I certainly felt something for him, something that went beyond sexual attraction.
I squeezed his hands. How could I possibly prove to him that I hadn’t been responsive for this?
Suddenly he yanked his hands from mine, the chains dangling with the movement. “There’s nothing you can show me that will prove your innocence. Go back to your own side.”
And our brief connection was lost. Severed by his mistrust.
CHAPTER THIRTY
Jacob
The guards came for Anna at dawn, taking her out of the cell and leading her away. She kept her chin high, obviously trying to be brave, but I sensed her fear. She was terrified. Had she been telling the truth last night when she’d said Kenny had fooled her, too? I didn’t know what to think. What to believe. The woman had me all tangled up in knots. Was she innocent? Or had she fooled me from the start? Fuck. I wanted to believe her. But I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. She was the reason I was in this fucking cell.
As I watched her walk away, I secretly prayed that they wouldn’t harm her. Despite what she’d done, I didn’t want anything to happen to her.
I thought of Hazel again, as I had every other thought for the past eight hours. Where was she? What had they done with her? Was she hungry? Had they fed her? Anna had said a woman had taken her and had said she would take care of her. I knew Hazel was still alive. Our connection had not been severed. I could still feel her. She wasn’t as terrified as she’d been in the beginning, and now her fear was mixed with confusion. I sensed she was overwhelmed by everything, and my chest tightened thinking of her with a stranger, scared, not understanding what was going on.
I sent Hazel another thought, hoping she would somehow receive and comprehend it.
Be brave, sweet girl. Daddy’s close. As soon as I can, I will come for you. I promise.
If they hurt my daughter in any way, I’d kill every single one of them. As soon as the opportunity arrived, as soon as I got out of these fucking chains, I’d turn the phantom loose. I didn’t care if it stripped me of my soul. If they harmed my kid, then I had nothing to live for. I didn’t need a soul. Being in this cell was already screwing with my mind, bringing back painful memories of my time with The Company. Nightmares of my time in hell.
They say you can’t run from your past. You can’t hide from things you’ve done.
That was true. I would never be free of my past, no matter how far or fast I ran. My past would always be a part of me. The past defined me, made me who I was today.
But thanks to Hazel and Anna, I was changing. In the short time since I’d taken Hazel in, I’d felt a distinctive change in myself. I’d grown softer. Weaker. I’d begun to truly care about things. I wanted to live. I wanted to be a father Hazel would someday be proud of. I wanted to be worthy of the title “Father”.
And since Anna had arrived two weeks ago, that softness, that weakness, that caring had grown stronger. Fuck. I wasn’t a soldier anymore. I wasn’t the violent killer I’d once been. I was just a man who wanted to find his own happiness in this world. I wanted a woman to share my life with. I wanted Anna.
Jessica had been right. I was falling in love with Anna. Hell, maybe I’d already fallen for her.
And she’d used that weakness to betray me.
I groaned and began to pace the cell.
I had to push her out. Keep my distance if I was going to survive.
So I pushed her from my mind and instead planned my revenge.
I would escape. I would free Hazel.
And Kenny and all his minions would die. Every last one of them.
The guards brought Anna back a few hours later. I remained sitting in my corner as they shoved her into the cell and walked away.
Her eyes were puffy and swollen, as if she’d been crying. Ignoring me, she went to her corner and sat.
Shit. Why had she been crying? What had those bastards done to her? As much as I didn’t want to care, I did. I cared too fucking much.
Unable to stop myself, I rose and went to her, settling down beside her on the cold concrete floor.
She sniffled, turning her face away from me.
“What did they do to you?” I whispered, gently threading a lock of her tangled hair through my fingers. “Did they hurt you?”
She swallowed hard. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
Anger seethed in my gut. That bastard Kenny had done something to her. I was going to kill that son-of-a-bitch. When I got free of these chains, he was going to suffer long and slow.
I lifted my chained arms over her head and drew her against me. She let out a quiet sob and burrowed into my chest.
Shit. Had he raped her?
“Goddammit. Did he touch you? Tell me, Anna. Did he hurt you?”
I’d never held a woman like this before. Never tried to comfort someone like this. I felt completely helpless right now, unsure what to do.
I couldn’t be mad at her when she was so obviously hurting.
“No,” she whispered at last. “He didn’t hurt me.” She didn’t sound very convincing.
I grabbed her chin and tilted her head back, forcing her to meet my gaze.
“Are you telling the truth?”
She closed her eyes and sighed. “He just interrogated me over and over, asking questions about you, things I don’t know the answers to. He told me about his plans. He’s going to make you fight. Going to make you kill. If you refuse, he’ll kill Hazel.”
I already knew that. But he’d hurt Anna with his interrogation and that pissed me off.
I hugged her more tightly, wishing she didn’t make me so weak. I should be pushing her away, making her suffer alone on the opposite side of the cell.
But I couldn’t ignore her suffering. I couldn’t ignore her pain.
I pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I’ll do what I have to, okay? I won’t let him hurt Hazel.” Even if I lost my soul in the process. No one would hurt my kid. Or Anna. No one.
We sat on the cold floor
in silence for a long time. Holding Anna like this, touching her, gave me strength. The connection that had been steadily growing between us wasn’t just physical, and I was willing to admit that now. Anna and I were connected in a way similar to what Ralph and I had experienced. It was similar to what Hazel and I shared. I suspected mine and Hazel’s connection had a lot to do with the fact that she was my child. She shared my DNA. While mine and Anna’s connection was of a different kind, not just the powerful physical/sexual attraction that sparked between us, but also a partnership type of bond similar to the one I’d shared with Ralph. As far as I knew, only the dregs shared such a connection. Did this growing connection with Anna have anything to do with the fact that my dreg partner was dead, thus leaving me open for a bond with someone else? Whatever the reason, I could no longer deny that there was something powerful between Anna and me.
Anna had already admitted that she’d felt a powerful connection to me, but I hadn’t wanted to admit our connection before—in fact, it hadn’t been this strong before—but right now, I felt that deep connection. I felt Anna’s pain, her fear, her worry. Her very presence here in my arms right now made me want to fight to get out of here. Made me want to live, whereas a few hours ago, I’d just wanted to die. Holding her, comforting her, feeling her pain like harsh lashes to my heart, pulled at my humanity. And in that moment, I wanted Anna to know everything about me. I didn’t want any secrets between us. I wanted her to be my partner in a way Ralph never had before, in a way that only a woman could be a partner to a man. If I didn’t survive this, then I wanted her to know who I was. All of me.
“When I was thirteen,” I began quietly. “I woke in a cell much like this one, with no recollection of how I’d gotten there and no memory of my life before then.”
She stilled against me. I’d gotten her attention. She didn’t say anything, just waited patiently. I sensed her interest, her curiosity.
“I’d been ‘recruited’ by a man who called himself ‘The General’. He was a decorated war hero but a complete bastard underneath. His ultimate goal in life was to create the perfect soldier. So he snatched kids off the streets and ‘bred’ kids at his facility by forcing his soldiers to fuck whores. He ‘recruited’ boys in any way he could. Then he turned us into his lab rats, injecting us with numerous experimental drugs, and different types of animal DNA, trying to create the perfect soldier.” I drew in a deep breath, then forced myself to go on. “He subjected us to horrendous torture, brainwashed us, fucked with our minds, forcing us to become stronger, to become merciless killers.”
Anna snuggled closer, wrapping her arms around me in a show of comfort. And it was that comfort, that acceptance, that allowed me to continue.
“I don’t know if it was the drugs they gave us or just natural abilities, but we all ended up with a supernatural talent. My gift was the ability to move silently, gracefully, so quickly it was barely discernible by the human eye. We were all trained in various fighting techniques, including mixed martial arts. I was a natural at fighting, better than all my dreg brothers, so my dreg name became The Fighter. Once my supernatural ability showed itself, my dreg brothers dubbed me the ‘Phantom of Death’. I was forced to use that ability on every mission to take out the enemy. I won’t lie to you, Anna. I’ve killed many people. Probably more than I can count. But I didn’t enjoy it. I don’t like killing. I only did it because I had to.”
She lifted her head off my chest, her gaze meeting mine. “I understand. I don’t blame you. I’ve done things in my life that I’m not proud of. Survival forces people to do difficult things.”
An unexpected lightness filled my chest. She didn’t judge me. She didn’t blame me for things I’d done.
“So how did you end up being discharged? Was it being shot in the neck?”
I drew in a deep breath, puffed it back out. “Yeah. The bullet shredded my trachea and mutilated my vocal chords. I had to undergo a tracheostomy while I healed. The doctors managed to piece me back together, and I had to learn how to talk again, coach my vocal chords into working again. That’s why my voice is so scratchy.”
“That’s incredible,” she murmured, looking into my eyes. “You’ve been through so much, Jacob. You’re a strong person to be able to endure so much and still come out with your humanity intact.”
I closed my eyes. I hadn’t come out of it with my humanity intact. It was Hazel, and then Anna, who had helped me find that humanity and bring it back. But I didn’t tell her that. Right now, my trust was extremely precarious. Yet I’d just shared things with Anna that I’d never told another living soul. I’d just bared myself to her, made myself vulnerable. She could use the information to hurt me if she wanted. But, somehow, I knew she wouldn’t.
We were both silent for a moment, me lost in my memories, she probably thinking about everything I’d just told her.
“So where are the other dregs?” she asked softly. “Why aren’t you with them? Don’t soldiers share a bond that extends far beyond war?”
I cleared my throat. “I betrayed them. They cast me out.”
“What?” She jerked upright, her gaze delving into mine. “What happened?”
I sighed. “The General killed Celia. Hazel’s mother. Then he kidnapped Hazel and threatened to kill her if I didn’t bring Tracker’s woman to him. So I kidnapped Jessica and took her to The General in exchange for Hazel’s release.”
Anna’s eyes went wide. “Oh my God. Tracker is another dreg?”
“Yes.”
“What happened? Did they hurt Jessica?”
“No. But Tracker had to give himself up so The General would let her go. Then The General pumped Tracker full of a new experimental drug that almost killed him. I will have to live with the guilt of that for the rest of my life. The other dregs went in and freed him, but he still hasn’t forgiven me. I don’t know if he ever will. I didn’t want to do it,” I whispered. “But I had no choice. They were going to kill Hazel.”
Anna squeezed my hand, her gaze never leaving mine. “You did what you had to do to save Hazel. I don’t blame you. I don’t judge you. I think someday Tracker will forgive you. And if he doesn’t, then fuck him. I’m assuming he doesn’t have a kid of his own, so he doesn’t understand.”
I let out a soft laugh and squeezed Anna to me. “No. He doesn’t have any kids. But he’s a good guy. I don’t blame him for being pissed at me. I betrayed him.”
“So where are all the other dregs?” Anna asked. “How do we contact them? If I somehow manage to escape, I can go to them and ask them to help you.”
I stiffened. Suspicion swept through me, dissolving the tentative trust that had developed over the past few minutes. Was she fishing for information about them? Had Kenny sent her back here to try to get information out of me?
Lifting my arms over her head, I pushed her away from me. She sat back, her eyes wide and confused. “What? Did I say something wrong?”
“I’m not telling you where the other dregs are. You think I’m stupid enough to give away their hideout so you can run to Kenny and tell him where to find them?”
She flushed. “I…” She broke off. “You think that was what I was doing? Collecting information for Kenny?”
I looked away. Yeah. No. I didn’t know. I just knew I couldn’t think straight around her. She messed with my head. Case in point: I’d just told her all about myself, revealed things that no one else knew about me. Was I a fucking idiot?
“Jacob?”
“I don’t want to talk anymore.” I rose to my feet and went back to my corner, ignoring her.
I cast a quick glance at her in time to see her face fall, her eyes fill with hurt. Fuck. I jerked my gaze away, not willing to let myself be affected by it. She hadn’t proven her innocence to me yet. I should have kept my mouth shut. I shouldn’t have bared my soul to her.
Because what would stop her from sharing the information with Kenny?
As we sat in silence, the distance between us stretched with each
passing moment.
Until the guards returned at the end of the day and dragged her away again.
I didn’t know if she would return. I didn’t know if she would tell Kenny all my secrets.
All I knew was that I’d just given the enemy the power to destroy me. They could torture Hazel in an attempt to get me to reveal the whereabouts of the other dregs.
And a betrayal of that significance would mean a punishment of death. I would deserve to die if I gave away their hideout.
Anna could ruin everything for me. She knew I would do anything to keep Hazel safe.
As I watched her walk away, I couldn’t shake the suspicion that Kenny had sent her back here just to get information out of me.
And fool that I was, I’d fallen for it.
I’d just given her enough ammunition to take me out.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Anna
Kenny was a vile man. I don’t know how I hadn’t seen it before. How had I been so fooled by the ruse? A disabled veteran? Ha! What a joke! He couldn’t even come close to comparing to any of the valiant heroes who had fought for our country. I wished he’d been blown up with his men when his meth lab had exploded.
When his guards brought me to his office at the top of the stairs in the warehouse, I wanted to kick his prosthetic legs out from underneath him. Legs that he’d stolen with his deception. I wanted to yank those legs off him and hit him over the head with them. Those prosthetics belonged to a vet who actually deserved them. I wanted Kenny to hurt. To suffer for what he’d done to Jacob. For what he’d done to Hazel. I wanted to make him pay for his deception, for lying to those good people at the veterans’ center.
I vowed in that moment that I would do whatever I had to do to get Jacob out of here. To save Hazel. To see that Kenny paid for his crimes.
I wasn’t a brave person, but love can make a person do brave things.
The Fighter Page 18
