by Emma Wolfe
His breathing was shallow, and it sent shivers across my skin as I stared at him. My fingers fiddled with the hem of his shirt. There was so much of Grayson that I wanted to feel. To touch.
Would he let me? Was it a good idea?
He shifted until his weight was on one arm. Then he brought his other hand up and wrapped it around my fingers.
“Rose, I can’t,” he said, dropping his gaze.
My heart stuttered to a stop as I stared up at him. I hadn’t expected this. I parted my lips to speak, but nothing came out.
He must have sensed my disappointment because he raised his gaze up to meet mine. “Not that I don’t want to. Heaven knows, I want to. But I can’t.” He let go of my fingers and raised his hand up to brush my hair from my cheek and tuck it behind my ear.
I was such an emotional wreck that I didn’t know what to do. My brain seemed to settle on a nod and a snort—which I think was an attempt at a laugh?
“It’s fine. It’s totally fine,” I said in what sounded like a wheeze.
From the look on Grayson’s face, he knew the truth.
“Rose,” he growled as I tried to step away from him. He pressed on my shoulder and returned me to the wall, where he then caged me back in again. “If you think I’m saying no because I don’t want you, you couldn’t be more wrong.” He leaned forward and held my gaze. The intensity of his stare and the tone of his voice caused me to stop moving.
“It’s not?” I whispered.
Grayson shook his head. “If you only knew what was going on inside of me every time we kiss. Every time I touch you.” He paused as he tipped his face up. I could see the muscles straining in his neck. Like he was physically trying to stop himself.
He glanced down at me again. This time, his gaze was softer. I could feel the way he felt for me by the way he looked at me, the way he took me in like I was the most beautiful woman in the world.
“But I respect you too much to do anything.” He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against mine. “When a shifter mates, something changes. In him. In her. It’s not just for fun. It’s forever.” He pulled back and stared at me. “And I can’t ask you to commit yourself to me forever. At least not right now.”
I parted my lips—the answer to his response felt as natural as breathing. I wanted to tell him that he was wrong. I was ready. I wanted him and only him. He was my future. I couldn’t be more sure of that.
But when he met my gaze, I saw the pain in his eyes. I saw his plea for me to let it go, so I swallowed my words. I furrowed my brow as it felt as if my heart was breaking.
But if I loved him, I would wait. If that was what he needed, I would prove to him that he was the only thing I would ever need. I would prove my loyalty to him, and then he would be mine and I would be his.
Wholly and completely.
So I pinched my lips together and nodded. Then I rose up onto my tiptoes and brushed my lips against his. “I’ll wait then,” I said as I shot him a devious smile.
Grayson furrowed his brow as he growled and wrapped his arm around my waist. Then he pulled me in and buried his face in my neck. I giggled as I tipped my head back, welcoming the touch.
“You make a guy regret his resolve,” he murmured as he kissed a trail of kisses from my neck to up behind my ear.
My body tingled as he nibbled on my earlobe a few times before blowing out his breath and stepping back.
“And that’s where I stop,” he said as he shoved his hands into his pockets like he needed to be physically restrained.
I pushed out my bottom lip, and Grayson narrowed his eyes at me.
“You’re mean,” he said as he turned and fiddled with the washcloth. He turned on the water and pushed it under the stream. “Sit down so I can finish cleaning you up. I can’t drop you off at your grandmother’s looking like that.”
I smiled as I nodded and obeyed his command. After I was settled on the tub, Grayson knelt in front of me. He pressed his body into me, and I glared at him.
“Talk about not being nice,” I said.
Grayson chuckled as he reached forward and began to dab at my face. He must have hit the gash on my forehead because pain shot through my body and I sucked in my breath.
He pulled back and studied me. “You okay?” he asked.
I nodded and forced my bravest face. He didn’t look like he believed me, but thankfully, he didn’t push it further. Instead, he leaned in and returned to cleaning my cut, this time with more of a gentle touch.
Before either of us could speak again, there was a frantic knock on the door. Grayson and I both glanced over when the door handle began to jiggle.
“Hey guys, my mom will be home any minute. Are you almost done in there?” Cora’s voice carried through the door.
Grayson winked at me as he leaned over and unlocked the door. “Yeah, we’re almost done. She’s all cleaned up,” he said as he stepped back.
I stood, hoping Cora wouldn’t pick up on what had just transpired between Grayson and me. But from her raised eyebrows and her hesitancy to come in, I knew she knew. The kiss had been epic. Something that I would dream about for nights to come.
My feelings for Grayson pumped through my veins and made me feel warm and safe. Standing next to him filled my soul with a rightness that I’d never felt before.
He said to wait, so we would. And someday, I could see myself walking down the aisle with him. Pleading my love to him. Giving myself to him in the ways that I so desperately wanted to do. I would be his and he would be mine.
But until then, we would be right where we were.
With the unrest of the pack in the woods, I wasn’t sure where that was, but I didn’t care. I’d leave that worry for the future.
The front door opened, and we heard Mrs. Gray call in for Cora. We turned to Grayson with wide eyes, and he just raised his hands.
“You’ve gotta go,” Cora said as she started pushing him toward the bathroom window.
Grayson nodded and reached over to unlock the window and slide it open. Then he climbed up and slipped out with an ease that surprised me. He clung to the windowsill as he turned around to face me.
“I’ll see you later?” he asked.
I nodded as I chewed my bottom lip and stepped up next to him. I brushed my lips against his and then pulled back. “You better.”
He gave me a wink, said his goodbyes to Cora, and then let go and fell to the ground. I watched as he sprinted across the backyard and into the woods.
Once he was out of sight, I turned to see Cora staring at me. Then a moment later she wrapped her arms around me and pulled me close.
“What happened?” she asked as she pulled back.
I swallowed as I turned my attention to the mirror. I winced at my reflection. I looked tired. I looked swollen. The gash on my forehead was bigger than I’d imagined—but I didn’t really care.
I had Grayson back, and he promised me he wasn’t going anywhere. Even though I looked like death, I couldn’t be happier.
I linked arms with her as we walked out of the bathroom and right into the surprised expression of her mom. Mrs. Gray ran her gaze over me.
“Oh my, Rose. Are you okay? Do you want me to take a look at that?”
I waved away her worry. “I’m fine. Just a klutz. Tripped on my way over here to grab Cora for breakfast.”
Mrs. Gray stared at me and then pushed her hair from the sweat that clung to her forehead. “Sounds good. You girls have fun.”
Cora nodded as we walked past. Remembering what we had planned for the afternoon, I nudged Cora. “Shopping?”
Cora glanced over at me and then nodded. “Right. Wanna go shopping after school, Ma? Christopher asked me to homecoming, and Rose is going dress shopping with her grandma.”
We turned around to see that Mrs. Gray had stopped and looked contemplative. Then she nodded. “Sure. That sounds fun.” Then she slipped into the bathroom and shut the door.
The entire way to the diner, Cora pelte
d me with questions. Where I had been. What happened after I disappeared. What did any of it mean. I gave her my answers as best I could. Truth was, Grayson and I hadn’t really talked much about what the future held for the two of us.
Instead, we’d lived in the moment.
I was tired of worrying about the future. It was nice, for a moment, to not care.
Eventually, we would have to face what happened in the woods. We would have to talk about what it all meant.
But for now, I was going to eat breakfast with my best friend and think of the boy that had my heart. For a moment, I was going to imagine that I was going dress shopping so I could go to a dance with the boy I loved.
I was going to pretend that I was just a girl in love with a boy.
At some point, I was going to have to face the truth. But not right now.
Right now, I was happy. And I was going to be happy for as long as I could.
17
Liam
I woke the next morning with a headache and in a piss-poor mood. I was agitated and angry, and the entire world felt as if it were suffocating me.
I threw my covers off, and I swung my feet to the ground. I leaned forward with my elbows on my knees and scrubbed my face.
This change in me—the one that was causing all of my senses to go haywire—was taxing. It took my body to a whole other level, and my human form was having a hard time keeping up. It didn’t help that whatever was going on with the Mother pack felt as real as my hand on my face.
I could feel their agitation. I could feel the unrest.
Something was happening. A war was brewing, and the wolf inside of me could feel it. The only thing it wanted to do was jump from my skin and sprint through the trees until it appeased this feeling.
I growled as I stood and stumbled to the bathroom. After a quick shower, I dressed and made my way downstairs. Dad was up. I could hear him. Sense him.
He was just as agitated as I was.
By the time I got into the kitchen, Dad had a plate of eggs and toast ready for me. He set them on the table and gave me a look. Then he returned to the counter to grab his own full plate.
“School today,” he commanded as he pulled a fork from the drawer in front of him.
I glared at him as I sat down. “So, it’s business as usual?” I asked. Hunger took over, and I began to shovel the food into my mouth at record speed.
Dad growled. It was low and menacing and, surprisingly, didn’t have the same effect on me as it had in the past. It must be because I was an adult wolf now. And, since Dad hadn’t taken his place as the alpha of the Mother pack, he didn’t rule me like he once had.
“Don’t give me lip,” Dad said as he stood in the kitchen, shoveling food down as well.
We ate in silence for a few minutes. My anger for my father and his weakness grew with each passing second until, finally, I threw my fork on my empty plate and stood. “How long are we going to go on like this?” I asked as I stomped into the kitchen and dumped my plate in the sink. Then I made my way to the fridge, grabbed the gallon of milk, and unscrewed the lid.
I didn’t bother with a glass. Instead, I drank straight from the jug. Once my thirst was quenched, I stuck the gallon back into the fridge and turned to see Dad glowering at me.
“Don’t speak like you know what’s at stake,” he said. He’d set his plate down and was facing me head-on. His arms were folded across his chest, and he was glaring at me.
“What does that mean?” I asked, matching his stance.
Dad studied me for a moment before he sighed and scrubbed his face with his hand. “You don’t understand the cost of what we are about to enter into. You think it’s all about dominance. That it just takes one wolf who is stronger than the other to win.” Dad’s voice drifted off as he stared out the window.
I waited, not really sure where he was going with this. But then I sighed and parted my lips to speak, but Dad beat me to it.
“Are you willing to kill Grayson? Evan? Noah?”
I blinked a few times, taken aback. “What?” I asked.
Dad stared at me. His gaze was fierce and unwavering. He spoke as if he’d experienced exactly what he was asking me. He’d killed his friends.
Dad’s expression dropped, and he turned away from me. He placed both hands on the counter in front of him, and his shoulders slumped as his head fell forward. “You don’t understand what it will be like. Friends will turn on friends. Family will turn on family.” Dad’s voice was low and broken.
My stance began to soften as Dad’s words sunk deep into my soul. I hadn’t realized what all of this was going to mean. Me evolving. Uncle Brutus declaring a challenge. Grayson leaving and whispers of his family rising up.
The gravity of the situation hadn’t triggered until right now.
At some point, I might have to fight Grayson…I might have to kill him.
Could I do it?
The fire that lit in my stomach told me I could. That, if it came to dominance, I would fight to the death. But another part of my soul, the part connected to the human side of me, cowered at the thought.
How could I willingly go into a situation that might result in the two of us killing each other? Was this what my life was now?
A deep desire to murder those who stood in my way?
Dad turned and looked at me. His expression had morphed into one of sorrow. “This isn’t what we wanted for you. Your mom wanted me to keep you from this life. She loved the pack, but when she saw what they were capable of, she wanted to leave.” Dad closed his eyes as he folded his arms across his chest. “I convinced her to stay. That there was some good left in the pack. That they weren’t just ruthless killers.”
Dad’s voice trailed off as he winced. The seconds that ticked by felt like hours as I waited for him to continue. The silence that filled the room felt deafening.
It wasn’t right, what the pack did to my mom. If I could go into the past and protect her, I would. But she was gone. There wasn’t anything I could do about it. Living in fear of the past wasn’t fair to my dad or me.
And it certainly wasn’t fair to Rose, who was still missing.
“They took Rose,” I said.
Dad opened his eyes and glanced over at me. “What?”
“Rose Jordan. They took her.” I stared at him, wondering what he was going to do with that information.
Dad furrowed his brow and then, a moment later, began to pace. “When? How?” Then his brow furrowed. “How do you know? Did you leave last night when I specifically told you to stay?”
I stared at him. I’d just told him that one of the residents of Smoky Hills was taken, and yet all he cared about was me leaving the house? Was he serious? “What does that matter? Rose is gone. What are we going to do about it?” I asked.
Dad blinked a few times before he turned around, grabbed his coffee mug, and brought the rim to his lips. He took a sip and then set it back down. “Liam, I understand what you want me to say, but we can’t just go into the woods with guns blazing. This is something we are going to take care of as adults.” He raised his eyebrows as he studied me.
I could tell he hoped that I would just accept what he said and leave it alone. I knew he wanted me to forget my desire to put all of this unrest to bed for good. But he had to know that wasn’t going to happen. That, either way, things were going to change. For Smoky Hills. For the Mother pack.
I growled as I grabbed my backpack and pulled open the back door. I was finished with talking. If he wanted me to go to school, I’d let him think that was where I was headed.
Once I made sure that Cora was safely in her classroom, I was going to head to the woods. I was going to find Grayson and Rose. I would save my friends.
Dad didn’t say anything as I pulled the back door closed and jogged down the steps. Just as I reached my truck, I stopped and turned toward the woods.
I didn’t have to see Grayson to know that he was there. I could feel his presence. I could feel his cha
nge.
He had evolved just like me.
My wolf clawed at my chest. It wanted to be unleashed. It wanted to be set free. The desire to be the alpha overtook me, and it took all of my strength to keep the animal at bay.
My friend was back. That was what I needed to focus on. I swallowed a few times as I pulled open the driver’s door and threw my backpack inside. Then I shut the door and jogged toward the woods. To where I felt Grayson hiding.
A few yards into the trees, I found Grayson. He was leaning one shoulder against a tree trunk, with his arms folded. His expression was strained as he stared at me. The struggle was as real for him as it was for me.
I pushed my hands through my hair. I needed to release this energy that was building up inside of me somehow. The last thing I wanted to do was shift. With my evolved abilities so new and so raw, all I could think about was what my dad had said.
Are you willing to kill Grayson?
Right now, the desire that raged inside of me shouted yes. But the other part of me, the sane and human part, yelled no.
It felt impossible, living this life. Feeling torn in two directions.
“You okay?” I asked, keeping my distance from him.
Grayson cleared his throat and nodded. “Yeah.”
I furrowed my brow. He didn’t sound okay. Nothing about what was happening was okay. I was losing my best friend. My right-hand man. Things were changing, and I didn’t like it. But it was too late to go back.
It was all too late.
And then I realized that he didn’t know. He didn’t know that Rose was missing. “Rose, is…” How was I going to tell him that his fate was missing?
Grayson shook his head. “I know. My father kidnapped her.” He must have picked up on my surprise because he rushed to say, “But she’s home now.”
I studied him and nodded slowly. “So are you back? For good?”
Grayson pushed off the tree trunk as he began to pace. Then he slowed and turned to look at me. “Do you know who the new kid is?”
Confused, I stared at him. “Who?”
