I laugh humorlessly. This totally represents how I feel right now. I’m pushing at this figurative weight that’s trying to sit on my chest and it’s trying to best me. I drop the actual weights into place and sit up.
Skittles comes storming in right at that moment. She looks sexy in sweats and heels like only she can pull off. Even the scowl on her face is adorable.
“Why aren’t you answering my calls or texts?” she demands.
“I have a lot of shit on my mind.”
She furrows her brows. Slowly she moves toward me as she studies me. I go to plant my hands on her hips when she halts in front of me, but I stop myself.
“What’s going on?” she says.
“Nothing,” I reply and stand.
She places her hands on my stomach. “Please stop. You’re scaring me.”
“I’m going to take a shower. I need to get upstairs.”
Lines appear in her forehead as she looks up into my eyes. “Where is this coming from? Something’s wrong. Talk to me,” she pleads.
“I’m trying to get to work, Mayven. I’ll call you later.”
She snaps her head back as if I’ve slapped her. Her thoughts race across her face. Suddenly, a light bulb seems to go off in her eyes.
“Where were you today? No one could find you for at least two hours.”
I throw my head back and blow out a breath. “Your father wanted to talk to me. I went to his office.” Looking at her again, my heart stops.
I’m not making this better. It’s why I needed some time. My head is fucked up and I don’t have the words for what I feel.
She releases me and takes a few steps back. “You didn’t think you should share this with me?”
“I didn’t think I had to.” The moment the words are out of my mouth, I know they’re wrong.
She begins to give a slow clap. “There he is. Our asshole is back.”
“Baby, listen. Can we talk about this later once I clear my head?” I try.
“What did he say to you?” She holds up a hand and shakes her head. “Never mind. I’ve got this.”
She turns and strolls toward the door. “Mayven. Mayven.”
She tosses a hand in the air to dismiss me. I release a growl. This day can’t get any worse.
“Fuck.”
Skittles
* * *
I’m so hot I could boil grease. Why do the men in my life think they know better than me and just take over? If I say I’m handling something or I’m not ready to do something, respect that.
I march right into my father’s house and head straight for his study. I’m so damn mad. I told him I wasn’t ready for him to meet Pit.
What does he do? He invites him to his office. I’m pissed at them both. Pit should have told me. I would have gone with him.
“I really don’t appreciate you going behind my back to talk to my man. I’m a grown woman. How dare you?” I snarl as I storm in on my dad in his office.
He turns away from the front of his desk, looks at me and places the book in his hands on top. Taking off his glasses, he wrinkles his brow. I glare at him as I stand with my hands on my hips.
“I wanted to talk to him. Get to know the young man,” he says.
“What did you say?” I nearly sob.
He falls back against his desk. “Apparently something wrong. I… I…” He pulls a hand down his face. “He impressed me. I can see he loves you. I’m not sure what I said to have you upset with me.”
“You never do. You never understand how to just talk to people, to say what you really feel and not the things that are misinterpreted. Now… Daddy, I love him so much.” I wipe my hand under my nose. “Sometimes you have a way of not saying anything that people other than me don’t understand. Hell, sometimes I don’t. When you say too much, you say too much. When you say nothing, it has more weight than a thousand words.”
“I asked him what his intentions are and then I asked him what made him special? Why would you settle down with him if you wouldn’t settle for the others?”
I groan and cover my face. “What else did you say?”
“That he should make sure you two are on the same page, so you’re not hurt. Listen, I don’t see the problem here. If he loves you the way he says, what have I done wrong?” he demands.
I huff and look my father in the eyes. “You’ve told a man who’s as afraid of losing me as you are that he needs to be on the same page as me. Daddy, to everyone outside of your head that sounds like he’s in love and I might not be.”
He runs a palm over his head. “I didn’t see it that way. He was so confident in his love for you… I saw how I felt about your mother. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.”
“I think I understand that now, but you have to understand under all that tough exterior, the man I love has been rejected by the most important people in his life. If I tell you I’m not ready for you to meet someone, trust my judgment.
“Allow me to get my relationship to where it needs to be so I can introduce you properly and be a darn buffer. You need a translator, Daddy. Not everyone speaks Marvin. Thirty-three years and it took your sister to explain to me that you still love me and never stopped loving Mommy,” I say.
His eyes widen and his face falls. “I’ve never stopped loving you. You’re my only daughter. And I will love your mother until I can be with her again and beyond. She was the love of my life.”
“Yeah, but I didn’t know that. Not from the way you hound me and all my decisions or by the way you seem so disappointed that I’m not married with two point five children and a dog,” I say gently.
He gives a quick chuckle. “Your mother used to call me Marvin the Martian. I tried so hard with you after she was gone. At times, I thought she was the only person in the world that understood me.
“I’ve always either pushed too hard with you or not enough. I didn’t mean to cause a problem. I’m a father who wants the best for his daughter. The way that young man talked about you. I was pleased. You’ve done well. I’m so proud of you Mayven,” he chokes out.
I sigh and my entire body sags. I stumble over to my dad and fall into his arms. I’m so exhausted.
“You just stay away from my future husband until I teach him how to understand you.”
He chuckles and rubs my back. It’s been a long time since we’ve been like this. I have to thank my aunt for that. I get my dad now. I can see what I’d been missing. I was too close before, now looking from the outside in, it makes sense.
“You know you could have done worse than the eyes and ears of Vander,” Daddy says.
I pull away and look at him in shock. I don’t know what to say. He gives me a knowing smile.
“You know?”
“Yes, for some time. I’ve done my research on all of your friends. Reynolds is a hell of a fighter. The young singer and his band grow on you. My secretary has ink from the artist.” He clears his throat. “I’m not sure what to think of the Joshua fella. I, uh, well, I’ve come across him in some interesting situations.”
I blush. “We’ll leave that alone for now. I’m not bringing him home to meet daddy,” I tease.
“But you know you can. They mean a lot to you. I want to be a part of your life. They are a huge part. Every birthday since your twenty-second, they’ve been there. When we lost your mom, they were there.
“I don’t know how to be a part of that but if there is a way… if you’d like to translate so I fit in… I’d like that very much, Mayven. I can’t make mistakes if you include me,” he says almost pleadingly.
“Yeah, Daddy, I can do that. Now that I know that’s what you want. I can do that. I’m still learning to speak Marvin too.”
He bursts into laughter and tugs me into a tight hug. I embrace him back. One relationship is on the mend. Now to figure out how to fix the other.
Don’t break my heart, Pit.
Chapter 32
Always Been You
Skittles
* *
*
I drag my tired body out of my car and head into my brownstone. The first thing I notice is Pit’s Mustang in my driveway.
I can’t help smiling. Him and his American cars. I love watching him step out of my Maserati. There’s just something so sexy about it.
He does it with BDE and that asshole swag. I have to get him to get one for himself. Maybe I’ll get him one for his birthday.
I come out of my tired thoughts and the next thing I notice are the lights on in my home. I gave Pit a key the other day. However, he’s supposed to be working tonight.
Truthfully, I had planned to deal with this tomorrow. I just don’t have the energy. My dad and I sat and talked for hours.
I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster all day. I inhale and push my way into my front door. Pulling my heels from my feet, I draw out the inevitable.
I climb the stairs barefoot. The first thing to hit me is the aroma of something delicious. When I reach the top of the landing and turn into the open living and kitchen area, Pit is sitting on my couch in slacks and a dress shirt, his sleeves rolled up past the elbow, a few of the top buttons undone.
He’s seated forward with his forearms resting on his thighs. However, what catches my attention next is the huge teddy bear beside him on the couch and the two vases of roses on the coffee table. My heart melts.
“Can you see yourself in a relationship?” he says before I can speak.
“What? I’m in a relationship with you.”
“But can we last?” He runs a hand through his hair. “If Kelex was nothing to you that means your father is right. You don’t do relationships often or for long. I assumed you and Kelex were a thing for a while. The other guys, I noticed them come and go. If Kelex was never one, then I’ve never seen you with anyone for long.”
I’m mad at my dad all over again. I knew this would happen. I want to throw something, but instead, I tug at the hairs of my lace front.
“Have you ever asked yourself why my relationships always suck? Only the last idiot was jealous of Kelex. All the others were jealous of you,” I say.
He snaps his head up and looks at me. I nod and continue. “They figured out Kelex was only a friend, but you… I always get questions about you. Have you two ever slept together? Why is he so protective of you? Are you in love with him?”
I swipe away a tear. I feel like all I’ve done today is cry. I stomp my foot in frustration.
“It’s always been you, Pit. You’re the reason I don’t want anyone else. No one moves like you, talks like you, and now I know for a fact there will never be another man who can set my body on fire like yo—”
I don’t get to finish my words. He has me in his arms consuming my lips. I wrap around him as he lifts me onto his waist.
“I’m sorry. Your dad caught me off guard,” he starts, but I place a finger over his lips.
“You don’t have to explain. I understand you. Now it’s time for you to understand me. I’m not going anywhere. I’ve been waiting twelve years to be yours. Do you realize all the crap I had to put up with?”
He places his forehead to mine. “I love you, baby. Give me some time to get this right.”
I peck his lips. “You got me a bear and you cooked for me without burning my kitchen down. You’ve got this.”
He roars with laughter. My heart settles. We’re going to be okay.
Chapter 33
Let Me Finish
Pit
* * *
I took the night off and came here to cook her dinner because I know I fucked up. I had to make this right or I wouldn’t be able to rest. Now… now I have a peace I’ve never known.
We’re in her bathtub, sitting in silence. Sex isn’t on my mind, I’m not thinking about the bar, Leo and Scarlett are setting up the new apartment they asked me for, stress is nonexistent in this moment. All there is, is her.
Her hair isn’t under a unit as she calls it. It’s out and wet from her letting me wash it. The level if intimacy we’ve reach is humbling for me.
I cup her forehead and bring her head back for me to kiss her nose, then her lips. It’s not a peck but lingers long enough for that electricity to spark in my veins. That jolt that reminds me I’m alive and loved by the most perfect woman on earth.
“This is nice. Today was tiring,” she murmurs as I release her.
“Yeah, I know what you mean.”
She looks back up at me. “Promise you’ll talk to me from now on. We could’ve avoided a lot if you told me about my father’s call.”
“Next time, if I can, I will.”
“Wait, I don’t like the way that sounds. What’s that supposed to mean.”
“I’ve been thinking. You know what I do. There are things I will never tell you or let you near. I’m going to need you to trust me on another level. It’s not that I don’t want to tell you, somethings are legally better for you to never know,” I explain.
“I would never tell anyone what I know.” She pouts.
I smile. “Listen, wannabe Bonnie. Clyde fucked up not protecting her. It’s a no for me. You will remain on the outside just like Leo and Scarlett,” I say.
“We’ll see,” she murmurs.
I shake my head. I let her have the last word on that. I know what’s not going to happen.
I absently run my middle finger back and forth over her collarbone. The bathroom is cloaked in silence again. My thoughts fall on the place I plan to get for us.
I wonder what all she wants in a home. I’ll ask. When she’s not stressed out.
“By the way, I was impressed with dinner,” she says right as I think of the kitchen our place will have.
“Glad I could please. I’ll let you place a request next time.”
“Did you learn to cook in college?”
“A little, it was when Leo came to stay with me that I took more interest in getting any good at it,” I reply.
“You’re a really good big brother.”
“Sometimes.”
“All the time.” She turns her head up to look at me. “Scarlett is finding her way. Stop beating yourself up for her adult choices. She’s smart. It will all work out. I think the twins living together will be a good thing.”
“I hope so.”
I brush my fingers along her cheek and look her face over. I want to give her the world, but there’s only one thing she wants. Shawna’s return. I need to make that shit happen.
She lifts her hand and cups my cheek. “Hey, where’d you go?”
I grab her hands and turn my face to kiss her palm. “Let me do this my way. These races are starting to feel like a distraction. Funny,” I muse. “That word has been a common denominator. It keeps coming up. What if we’re focused on the wrong thing?”
She snorts. “Yeah, sex. I’m failing Shawna as it is. I can’t let you take over and storm in there. Where is there?”
I clench my teeth. “If I involve Blake, I can get this done. I won’t let anything happen to her.”
“You want me to trust a mobster with my cousin’s life? We already have enough of those in the equation. I’ve heard things about Blake Knight. You keep your hands clean, him… not so much.”
I narrow my eyes at her words. Something in there nags at me. Skittles sits up and turns in the bath, she moves to straddle my lap.
I grasp her hips and tug her close. “Let me finish this. You’ve heard rumors. I know the man, he’ll understand if I explain things. I need to pull him out of the dark. I know I can finish this and bring her home. I feel it in my gut. I need to do this.”
“If it were only me, I’d say yes. If something happens to her, my father will never forgive me, and my aunt will be devastated. Pit, I made my mom a promise on her deathbed. I didn’t understand it then, I was frustrated that she even cared.
“She asked me to look out for my dad and his career. If he ever needed covering, she wanted me to be there for him and cover him. Now I understand that was her thing.
“She cov
ered us. This goes deeper than Shawna’s request to keep them out of this. My gut tells me I need to. I need to cover my family. So no, baby, I can’t let you finish this your way.”
I nod.
I’ll agree. For now, but something tells me to be ready to turn the tides. I’ll have to show my true face at some point.
Chapter 34
No!
Skittles
* * *
We pull up into a spot in the parking garage for the race tonight and step out of the cars. Everyone rounds to the front of our vehicles as we take it all in. Finally, we’re getting back to the races. However, this was the one challenge I was worried about for my team.
“What is this? Some Tokyo drift shit?” Pit grunts. “Now the video makes sense.”
“Yeah, I think that’s supposed to be the idea. We drift in here and there’s an outside course once we hit the bottom, it’s a shorter race though,” I reply.
“I hate that drifting shit,” Pit mutters.
My stomach churns. This is something I know. He can drift, but Pit isn’t as smooth at it as I am. If he gets picked to drive tonight, we’re screwed. If this is a partner race, we’re totally fucked.
I wring my hands in front of me. Losing races isn’t an option. I hope like hell they continue to pick me as the driver thinking I’m the weaker of the two.
“I don’t have a good feeling about this one,” Pit says.
“Yeah, me neither,” Rome says quietly.
Something is off. For one, the crowd is different. Another thing, we’re in Vander, but this is the heart of the city. Not the greatest time or place for this.
Things are usually live and jumping in Vander City this time of night. We’re like a baby New York or Vegas. Our night life can rival either.
Pit: The A**hole Club Series Page 19
