“Does it make you feel better?”
My eyebrow went up. “What, the fighting?”
“Yeah.”
I shrugged. “Depends. Most of the time, yeah.”
“Do the women ever fight? Do they allow that?”
Frowning, I looked into her eyes, trying to figure out where the hell she was going with this, because she couldn’t be going where I thought she was going. “Yeah, women fight all the time. More vicious than the guys, actually.”
She nodded. “Okay. How do I sign up?”
“Aly, what?” I laughed, shaking my head. “Nah, that’s not… nah.”
“Why not?” she asked. “Mos said you fight to escape. Because you’re angry. Well, I’m a little fucking angry too.”
“You’re gonna go get beat up because you’re mad at me for beating somebody up?”
Her face pulled into a scowl. “No, asshole. First – I can probably fight. Probably. Second – nobody’s mad at you.”
“You know what… you could probably hold your own, with the right motivation. Otherwise nah babe. But what are you mad about?”
She pushed out a sigh, dropping her gaze to her hands. “I’m mad at Gran. For leaving us. I’m mad at her body, for betraying her. For getting sick. I’m mad at the Apex for making everything so fucking horrible, and making the medicine and care so expensive. I’m mad at her for not telling me everything she could’ve. Things she should’ve. I’m mad at myself for being mad about it. I’m mad about a lot. Where’s my escape?”
“Somewhere healthy,” I countered. “Not somewhere that will leave you bloody, with a fucked-up face.”
“So it’s fine for you, but not for me. Got it,” she snapped, pushing herself up. I was quick though, grabbing her and pulling her right back down to my lap.
“It’s not fine for me either,” I admitted. “But it’s how I cope when I need to, without getting lost in liquor, or pills, or pu…” I let that trail off, knowing that wasn’t a good line of conversation to open – not when Aly was on edge like this.
I hadn’t caught myself in time though.
“Pussy, huh?” she asked. “Why didn’t you go for some of that? There were women all over the place, salivating over you outside that cage. Pussy galore.”
“The only pussy I want was supposed to be in the bed, resting, after a hard day,” I told her – I had no problem being up front.
“So you beat somebody with your bare hands instead? That sounds logical to you?”
I shook my head. “Who the fuck said anything about logic, Aly? It’s not logical, and neither is this conversation – I feel like you’re talking around whatever the hell your problem is, instead of just laying it out!”
“That’s what you want? You want me to just lay it out?”
Based on her tone and volume… shit, did I want her to lay it out?
Before I could offer an answer, she was up, off my lap. I intended to reach for her again, but I couldn’t do anything but sit back, surprised.
She was taking her clothes off.
Maybe clothes was an overstatement, since she was just in panties and one of my shirts, but she had both off in a flash, and was back in my lap, tugging my boxers down. I was confused as hell, but it took nothing for my body to respond to her, allowing her to sink onto me with a deep sigh as I anchored my hands at her hips, stopping her before she moved.
“Aly, what the fuck is going on?”
She shook her head, then looked up to meet my eyes. “I don’t know. But I don’t drink, or do drugs, and you don’t want me to fight. I need the escape though. So, pussy it is, I guess.”
“You mean… nevermind.”
I lessened my grip and let her move.
There was no competition – the warm, slick tightness between her thighs was a helluva lot better than being in a sweaty cage with another guy. She settled into me, barely moving, but with the pain in my side, that was fine.
I let her go like she wanted.
And even though it hurt like a bitch because of my jaw, when she kissed me, I kissed her back, with everything I had to give.
I wrapped my arms around her, holding her tight when she buried her face in my neck, crying, but still moving, still looking for the escape. I took over, stroking up, and up, and up, until her nails dug into my shoulders, thighs tightening on either side of mine. This differed from before – no sweat, no cursing, no words at all. Just a quiet, necessary release.
She didn’t move, and I didn’t either – after a few minutes had passed, I realized her exhaustion, mental and physical, had gotten the better of her.
She was asleep.
Instead of trying to move, I reached for the blanket at the end of the couch, pulling it over both of us, so I could join her.
Seventeen
I could listen to her talk about him all day.
Between us, I’d call Nadiah the “fun” one – the one who knew people, the social one. But I’d never heard anyone make her gush the way she was, as we walked side by side down a Burrows sidewalk, headed to breakfast. Sure, she’d talked about Mos a lot after that initial trip here, when they first met. But now that they could be together?
She had stars in her eyes, and I loved it.
“We should find a place, you know?” I asked her as we turned a corner. “Here, in the Burrows. It’s been like two weeks now, and if we’re making this permanent, we should have something of our own. I have to figure out how much a place costs…”
Nadiah raised her eyebrows at me. “Why? What’s wrong with the setup we have now? I’m helping with the internet set up with Ches’ people, so I can stay there as long as I want, and be close to Mos. Are you not happy staying with Maddox anymore? Are you two having problems?”
“No, not at all,” I smirked. Problem was not the word for what Maddox and I were having, probably much too often. So often it was probably clouding our judgment. “I know we’re post-apocalypse and all, but it’s too soon for us to be living together. I don’t want us to get tired of each other.”
“You’re feeling like that?”
“No, but I want to get ahead of it, I think. I’ve never had an adult relationship, and I move in with the first one? It’s not sensible.”
Nadiah shrugged. “Who the hell cares, Aly? Look at what’s going on around us – yes, we had to lay Gran to rest last week, which still hurts, but the other things? We’re free. We’re walking to breakfast, at a restaurant. There are kids playing together over there,” she pointed. “And look at that – according to the sign, that is a whole café, just for coffee. Six months ago, would any of this have sounded possible to you?”
“No. No, you’re right, but it feels too good to be true. Like this has come way too easily. It hasn’t been expensive enough.”
Nadiah sucked her teeth. “Uh, have you forgotten the tunnels already? Forgotten Adam Bishop at our door?”
“Of course not,” I told her. “That’s not what I’m saying.”
“Then what are you saying?”
“Ugh.” I adjusted the straps of my backpack as we headed up another street. After breakfast, we were supposed to go shopping, to replace our toiletries and other little things we needed. I was looking forward to filling my bag and still having money left, but honestly the sheer possibility of that only contributed to my current feeling. “I’m just waiting on the other shoe to drop. Because there’s no way it isn’t coming.”
“What if they already have?” Nadiah pressed. “And you’re doing all this worrying for nothing?”
“I don’t think so.”
Nadiah stopped walking, to laugh. “Wow. What did Maddox do?”
“Huh?” I asked, turning to face her. “What does that mean?”
“It means he must have made you feel some kind of amazing if you’re looking for the trap, wondering if it’s a setup. So what did he do?”
What hadn’t he done?
I sighed. “It’s stupid.”
“I bet it’s not.”
She shrugged. “Fine. But tell me anyway.”
Okay.
I’d woken up in bed alone.
Which, wasn’t abnormal at all – I knew where Maddox was, because I could hear him on the other side of the wall partition, working out. So I got up to watch, just like I had several mornings since I arrived, because watching his display of incredible strength, his muscles flexing, sweat dripping off his beautiful skin…
It was a nice way to wake up.
When Maddox worked out at home, he played music on a little speaker – he explained that it was so the cords of the earbuds didn’t get in his way. He played it low – for my sake, since it was early, and it was always hip hop, with heavy up-tempo beats that created a certain vibe.
I bumped the speaker.
Well, I knocked over the whole setup, actually, and it cut to a different song. Luckily, it was the end of his workout anyway so I hadn’t interrupted anything – he laughed. Teased me about being clumsy. And let the song play while he cleant up the space, and I went to make us coffee.
It was a beautiful song – a love song. I couldn’t help smiling over it when the woman sang a line about her lover being the coffee she needed in the morning, and sunshine in the rain. I stopped what I was doing to listen, my face growing warm as the lyrics sank into me, about someone being the best part of your life.
And then I realized Maddox had stopped too, to listen.
And stare at me.
Water in the desert.
Pain relief.
I’ll follow you anywhere.
That was the gist, and Maddox was looking at me.
And then he was on me, and in me, sweaty and salty, but I didn’t care about that at all. What I cared about was his sudden, driving need to be inside me while that song was playing, while these lovers gave a back-and-forth plea to hear their love declared out loud.
“You see now why I said it was stupid?” I asked Nadiah, once I’d finished telling the story. I expected her to nod along, agreeing because she got me, but no.
“If that is stupid, sign me up,” she said. “Because oh my God, I know which song you’re talking about, and… oh my God. You two are getting married.”
“Please don’t do that,” I groaned. “We’ve been here two weeks. I’ve only known this man existed for two months.”
“That means nothing,” Nadiah countered. “I cannot believe that happened this morning and your reaction is that me and you should find a place together. Have you lost it?”
“That question presumes I had it in the first place, little sister.”
“You know, you’re right.”
I sucked my teeth. “That’s not what you were supposed to say. You’re supposed to be reassuring me!”
“I’m not reassuring shit for you,” Nadiah laughed. “That strong, sexy, sweet man thinks you’re the best part of his life and you want to move in with your little sister.”
“In my defense, what I want is my little sister out of Franchesca Catlan’s house, because I don’t trust that lady – I just led with the other stuff, okay?” I told her, motioning for us to walk again.
“Ches isn’t that bad – she has a hard exterior.”
I grunted. “Sure.”
“I’m serious,” Nadiah insisted. “Do you know how Maddox and Mosley ended up with her?”
I nodded. Maddox had told me a little of the story late one night. “Well, I know about Maddox, but not about Mos.”
“Probably because it’s awful. And not his story to tell I guess, and I won't go into detail either, but they rescued him from the Apex. He was in schooling there, early, being forced to code, and develop tech, and all that. But it wasn’t just that. Tall, handsome black kid… you know what they made him do, right?”
I sighed. “I can imagine, unfortunately.”
“Yeah. He was only fifteen when Maddox and Ches got him and few other kids out. He hasn’t been back to the Apex since. Won’t even go into the Mids. Too close.”
“Wow.”
“Right. I know Ches is a little hard, but she rescued him, and a lot of the others, from horrible situations. She can’t be all bad, right?”
“I don’t know her well enough to answer that question,” I admitted. “I just know I’ve never gotten a great vibe, like there’s an ulterior motive with her. And let’s not forget that she was the one who drove Maddox into a goddamn cage fight.”
Nadiah sucked her teeth. “From the way the bets went, it seemed like Mad is a regular around there. And besides that, you know watching him beat that guy up made you hot. Grief or not.”
“Even so…”
“Uh-huh,” Nadiah laughed. “Seriously though – maybe if you came around, you could catch her vibe better, you know? Maybe have dinner or something?”
“We’ll see,” I conceded with a sigh, as we turned another corner, onto a smaller street. We were almost at Café Azul, the restaurant where Maddox had taken me to meet Blue when we were here the first time. I remembered the food smelling amazing, and had wanted to come back since then – I was happy for the chance to bring Nadiah.
But something was wrong.
“I think we’re being followed,” I told her. I slapped a grin on my face as I turned to look behind us, hoping it wouldn’t raise any suspicion.
At first, Nadiah laughed, but when I didn’t join her, her eyes went wide. “Oh, you’re… you’re serious?”
“Yes,” I hissed. “There are two guys. They’ve turned every time we turned, stopped every time we stopped. I think they’re trailing us.”
“Why though? Do you think maybe the guys did this? For protection.”
I shook my head. “I told Mad where we were going – if he thought I needed protection to get there, I feel like he would have said something. Or escorted us here himself. No, this is something else.”
“Something like what?”
“I don’t know.”
The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and I glanced back at the same time a dark van turned onto the narrow street, approaching us from behind. So far, my instincts had been too on point to not trust them now.
“Nadiah, listen – get to the end of the block – that stop sign right there. Make a left and keep going. Do not stop until you get to Café Azul and ask for Blue. If he’s there, mention me, mention Maddox.”
The van was on a slow creep, but still coming, as if it were waiting for a certain moment. I didn’t have to glance back to know the guys I’d noticed were getting closer.
“Aly…” Nadiah said, but I shook my head as I pulled my backpack from my shoulders.
“Just do what I said, please. I’m about to stop walking – you keep going. Once you get past that trash can – run. As fast as you can go, okay?”
“I… okay.”
I nodded, and stopped, unzipping my bag. “Go.”
She did.
I let my gaze drop into my backpack, rifling around in it until my hand closed around what I was looking for.
“Can I help you guys?” I asked the two men following us as I let the bag drop to the ground. Behind me, I heard the change happen as Nadiah’s footsteps turned into a sprint. “Uh-uh-uh,” I said, brandishing that rusted chair leg I’d kept all this time, just in case it came in handy again. They intended to follow her, but were surprised enough by me turning on them with a weapon that neither tried to pass. “I asked if I could help you.”
They wore masks now. They hadn’t before, when they were keeping enough distance that their features were hard to make out. The van was still a little further back, idling. Waiting.
To take me and Nadiah.
It was two – maybe three, or more – against one. I’d faced those odds before, and knew my chances weren’t great, but they weren’t just going to stand here long.
I had to act now.
Instead of trying to get close, I used the bit of distance in my favor, cranking the chair leg over my shoulder and then throwing it, bean
ing one man right between the eyes. Whoever was driving the truck must’ve seen that, because it sped toward us now, as the guy who wasn’t writhing on the ground, holding his head, reached to grab me.
Without thinking twice about it, I aimed my knee for his groin, as hard as I could – he went down as soon as the blow connected. I didn’t stop for my bag, I took off, following the same directions I’d given Nadiah – get down the street, turn at the stop sign, don’t stop until you get to the café, not for anything.
The guys hadn’t stayed down long.
They were right on my tail, declaring me all kinds of vulgar names as I sprinted down the street, lungs burning. As I approached it, I wasn’t sure why I thought Café Azul would be some sanctuary, but it was the only thing I had to hold on to at the moment. I had to try.
For all I knew I was walking right into a net – nothing was stopping them from coming in after me, and I was leading them right to Nadiah. Still, something akin to relief twisted in my gut as I snatched the front door open, tripping over the mat as I ran inside.
When I hit the ground, I knew it was over – the door hadn’t closed behind me. But when I turned to look out of the front glass, I saw the guys who’d been chasing me climbing into the van before it sped off.
My relief was short-lived though.
I was snatched up from the ground by beefy-looking men in sweat suits and dragged through the back halls of the restaurant while I struggled. It wasn’t until they pulled me into a familiar, smoke-filled room that I settled some, my heart still racing as they deposited me in front of Blue, who took a long drag from his hookah.
“Alyson Little. I see you found yourself.”
“What?”
I glanced where he pointed, to where Nadiah was sitting a few feet away, eyes wide.
“Last time I saw you, you thought you were looking for her, right? There she is, right there – you welcome for that.”
I swallowed my annoyance, remembering it wouldn’t get me anywhere with him. “You didn’t find her – I sent her to you,” I said. “For help. Unless you’re part of this too.”
Wonder Page 21
