by T. G. Ayer
Chayya watched over her as she settled into the cushions and closed her eyes. The only time she'd done this before was with Kali's guidance, and with an event she'd physically attended.
A voice whispered, "Keep your thoughts focused on Narakasura. Find a point in time in which you were with him, then move back along the timeline."
Maya blinked and looked around. "What is it, honey?" asked Leela, her brow furrowed as Maya lifted her head and scanned the room.
Kali.
Maya could have sworn that was the voice in her head, but the goddess wasn't around.
Shaking her head, Maya relaxed again and closed her eyes. Her thoughts drifted back to seeing Kas at the table with Nik and Yama. She inhaled slowly, then let the breath out through her mouth.
Calm filtered through her as she settled on Kas, allowing her mind to flow into his consciousness.
And she gasped.
She didn't need to go back in time to figure out who had brought about the downfall of Patala. It was all there in Kas's head.
Look at her, he thought, his emotions filled with a latent anger. She comes in here as if she is capable of saving Yama and his son. What a waste that she sides with them.
Maya blinked, the shock of Kas's inner voice throwing her out of his thoughts for a moment. She had to start again, concentrate to re-enter his mind.
Bana was right. I should have worked harder to convince her to join me. Now that would have been a victory, having the Hand of Kali on my team.
Maya swallowed her shock. So it is Kas. He masterminded the whole thing. And he'd been the villain all along. Something she'd refused to accept.
Joss was going to have a field day with this information.
Priya was right, but she was still an infatuated female. Pity. Kas's thoughts focused on Priya's death, images of the abandoned shack flitting through his head. He must have sent people to check up on the Rakshasi and found the empty hovel. She allowed her emotions to cloud her judgment. I gave her a second chance, but she used it for petty revenge against this one. Poor stupid, Priya. She was so far gone she didn't even realize what she'd been doing chasing and killing all those girls. That she'd made them into her own personal demon horde didn't make up for the selfishness of her actions. All she'd wanted was to get back at Maya, however indirectly.
Wow, was that what Priya had been up to? Maya was horrified.
Now, she wished she was there to kill her again. All those girls Maya had killed were the ones that had gone missing. Maya shuddered and her stomach did a sickening somersault. In the end she'd killed them instead of saving them, and even the thought that they may have been too far gone, having been turned into demons and all, didn't make her feel any better.
Right now, all she wanted to do was to put her hands around Narakasura's neck and squeeze the freaking life out of him.
Unfortunately, a sojourn in the demon king's mind would prove useful, so Maya forced herself to listen to his thoughts again.
Through his eyes she could see herself looking a little shaken up, the demon holding tightly to her hands. She glanced at Nik and her skin went pale, her eyes filling with worry. Maya stiffened. Had her face always been so open for anyone to read? Her affection for Nik was so obvious to Kas but she had to wonder if it was because he knew her better than most people.
Narakasura knew her too well. Not a good thing.
How had she misjudged him so badly? She'd given him the benefit of the doubt over and over again. Was it because of her visit to his past, and the knowledge of what he'd gone through at Bana's hands? Had all of that contributed to Maya feeling sorry for him, making excuses for him?
She shook the thoughts off and paid attention as Gopal looked at Kas. Now it made sense what he'd been waiting for. A sign from the demon king, the okay to take them to the dungeons. Maya waited with the utmost patience as she followed Narakasura through the next few minutes, despising every second that she had to spend in his head.
Inside the cell he gave Nik a glare. You better watch yourself, or she's a goner.
Maya frowned. Those thoughts belonged to Kas, so why did Nik look so strained. He couldn't have heard the demon's words.
Then, the muscles in Kas's fingers tightened. He was holding something within his hand, but since he wasn't looking down, Maya couldn't tell what it was. All she had to go on was the sense of utter confidence Kas had that Nik would not make a move.
The demon king watched Maya walk toward the cot and followed her. She recalled paying little attention to his movements, and regretted it now. She'd ignored anything suspicious because she'd wanted to trust him.
Just look at her. So trusting. So blind. She doesn't see that eventually they will use her too. That all she is to them is a means to an end.
A rush of sadness and empathy ran through Kas, its strength and genuineness a real surprise. He really did believe that Maya was merely a pawn, manipulated by everyone around her.
Her stomach tightened at the thought. And then she shoved it away, locking it in a dark corner of her mind. Right now was not the time to be contemplating such thoughts. Right now she needed to glean as much as she could from the demon king's mind.
His gaze shifted. From Nik to his lap then back to Nik again.
No. Not his lap.
His right hand that lay on the cot beside his lap.
The knife held within his palm, hidden from Maya by the rise of his thigh.
Maya stiffened and the link was broken. She went rushing back into her own body and sat up with a gasp. Putting a hand to her chest, she forced herself to take a deep breath.
"What happened, Maya?" asked her mom, panic lacing her voice.
"It was Kas." Maya met her gaze, feeling a little faint and a whole lot stupid. "It was Kas who tried to kill me."
Chapter 41
"IF IT'S THE last thing I do, I'm going to kill him." Never before had such unadulterated, all-encompassing fury filled Maya's soul. Kas's betrayal had hit her full in the gut, and in the heart. How had her judgement been so wrong?
"Perhaps it is best you think along the line of arresting him?" suggested Chayya. When Maya looked up at the goddess with a frown, she continued. "The Hand of Kali was never meant to be an executioner."
Maya was silent for a while. Chayya had a good point. Maya was probably not the best person to be judge, jury and executioner, especially when her own judgment had been seriously skewed to begin with.
She'd trusted him.
Maybe the goddess suspected that Maya needed more convincing, because she cleared her throat. "Lord Shiva would appreciate the opportunity to speak directly with his devotee."
It hadn't been necessary for Chayya to mention Lord Shiva, but his name made Maya realize that all this nonsense could be laid at his feet. "He gave Narakasura that boon right? To never die except by his mother's hand?"
Chayya nodded while Maya's mom's face appeared shadowed, strained.
"One would expect that he'd have gotten the message by now that life and destiny have a way of getting around such boons."
"Yeah. Especially when Lord Shiva himself agrees with life and destiny."
The goddess laughed softly. "Which is why Lord Shiva would prefer to discuss this directly with Narakasura. But, of course, if you were unable to summon him to Mt Kailas, or if the situation so requires it, you have Lord Shiva's permission to end the dominion of Narakasura over Patala and by extension, the rest of the world."
"Kill him, you mean?" asked Maya. Too many words were confusing her tired brain. Chayya merely gave a nod in answer.
"As a last resort, of course. The ideal method of his dispatch would be at the hand of his mother."
Maya shuddered, giving her mom a sad smile. She'd never been more glad to have her mom right at her side during this awful time. Mother's killing their kids, something Maya wished she didn't have to contemplate.
Maya sighed and sank into the cushions behind her, feeling exhaustion take her over. No surprise there, she thought
. All the time-travel does take it out of a girl.
She heard her mom ask her if she was okay, heard Chayya assure her it was just time-travel fatigue and that it's probably good for her to rest. A part of Maya wanted to protest, but her vision darkened and she fell asleep
Chapter 42
Maya opened her eyes to a world of darkness.
But this time it wasn't dense and black and filled with nothing. This darkness was a beautiful, expansive night. She'd never dreamed of the milky way, or of outer space before. Even the words outer space made her think Star Trek and Star Wars, not reality.
But here she was, floating weightless, the blazing sun to her right, in a sea of stars and planets and pale dust that swirled around innumerable tiny worlds.
Spectacular.
And spectacularly strange, too. Maya never dreamed of space.
She blinked, finding she was strangely conscious in this dream. If it was a dream. She was more aware than she'd ever been before in a dream.
Light shifted, crashing off something to her right. Maya urged her body to move, expecting it to be like swimming in a thick soup of black. But the lack of gravity had little effect on her movements. Lord Shiva sat in the air before her, his cross-legged pose so familiar, his indigo skin glowing with an angelic light. He floated on nothing, much like Maya, and yet he didn't move either.
He was the god she'd known all her life and yet he was different. Today the tiger's pelt he usually wore around his waist had been replaced with a piece of fabric that looked like it had been ripped straight from the milky way beyond the god's body.
Planets spun and stars twinkled within the silky swathe of material wrapped around Lord Shiva's hips. More aspects of the god seemed to stand out to Maya, as her awareness returned to her only in small drips. Lord Shiva's usually blue-tinged skin was now a deeper navy, sprinkled with stars, the rushing river that often flowed from his moon-bedecked hair was now an ethereal milky way that trailed off around his mountainous shoulder and disappeared into the cosmos.
Even the trident he held was no longer gold. Fashioned from the stars, it was a bright glowing thing that looked like diamonds and moonlight.
The sight of Lord Shiva, so large, so majestic, made Maya feel a little faint. She looked up at the face of the god in his true form. Her awareness heightened and she watched him without a breath. He was the creator, the preserver and the destroyer and yet so many people focus only on the last of his functions.
Seeing him in this form convinced Maya that those acts of destruction were merely the natural cycles of life, the things that symbolically ended a process. He killed darkness with light, but darkness was not dead, merely contained, controlled. He ended life, but it was not permanent. Life returns with reincarnation or rebirth in some form. He killed ignorance with knowledge, but ignorance had an infinite number of forms, so destruction continued for the good of everyone.
Lord Shiva, his aspect so large that Maya had to crane her neck to see his face, opened his eyes. She shivered inwardly, refusing to show how intimidating the experience was. Just when she began to feel the pull of the muscles in her neck, strained from staring up at the god's face, her body shifted and she rose in the air.
She floated higher until she was abreast of the god. Her gratitude was forgotten as soon as she met his gaze. Within each eye an entire universe shimmered and twisted, and within the space of a breath, she knew beyond anything she'd ever known before, that Lord Shiva was the universe, he was creation, and existence personified.
How strange that an outer-space dream would result in her understanding the complications of Lord Shiva.
Maya swallowed a gasp as Lord Shiva blinked. "Thank you for coming, Maya," he said, his voice deep yet soft.
The god's voice enveloped her, echoing slowly around her ears. She knew that outer space was a vacuum, that gravity was zero and that no sound traveled there. Yet she heard the musical notes of the god's voice in her head.
She hesitated, unsure how to respond. Saying 'My pleasure' certainly didn't seem appropriate, especially since she hadn't been asked. And if it was a dream, it meant she was talking to a figment of her imagination.
On the other hand, if this was real she would be disrespecting Lord Shiva to his face.
She decided to go with the assumption of reality. It was safer.
But, before she could open her mouth to speak, Lord Shiva tilted his head to study her and he said, "Do not be afraid, Maya. I decided to bring you here," he waved a hand at the view around them, "in order to show you the essence of our being."
Maya swallowed hard and nodded, once, twice, before going very still.
Lord Shiva seemed okay with that. He probably dealt with nervous humans on a daily basis. "The universe is who we are, intrinsically." He spoke and again his voice echoed in her head, more real now than a dream. "Even as individuals, we form part of this cosmos, every act we perform, every thought we have, has its effect. Like a pebble in the water, the waves flow out, impacting all it touches. A never ending consequence as each ripple causes more ripples, and they in turn have effects further along the way."
Maya had heard that saying before, but had never thought of it in terms of a universal effect. She'd taken it more figuratively.
"This is a much better depiction of how it works." Lord Shiva flicked a finger and beside him light exploded.
Like a fireworks show, bright white light burst from a single point, expanding until it formed an oval shape. Tiny suns flickered from pinpoints of light, swelling until they looked like fiery planets. They began to spin in a ring, that expanded and contracted until it settled into a full circle. Maya began to suspect what was appearing before her, when more light exploded within the circle and began to form into the shape of a dancing man.
The Nataraja.
The Dance of the Cosmos.
The image of Lord Shiva himself formed within the brilliant circle and as Maya looked closer she gasped in amazement. Each spinning sun was more than just a glowing orb. A universe of suns and planets and stars, that shone blindingly bright, spun along the perimeter of the circle, constantly circumnavigating the Creator.
Maya was in awe.
Within the Nataraja image, Lord Shiva's face and body glowed with the light of a million suns, emanating such power, such emotion that hot tears trickled down her cheeks. All of a sudden, she was overwhelmed.
"The universe is you," said Lord Shiva softly. "And you are the universe."
Chapter 43
Maya shifted her gaze, reluctant to look away from the stunning Nataraja for fear that it would disappear. The thought of not being able to look upon it again made her feel inexplicably sad.
Lord Shiva smiled when Maya met his eyes, but he said, "A long time ago there was nothing. None of this existed." He waved a hand around him. "Then one day life just was. And I just was. I am the giver and the taker. Omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent."
All-seeing, all-present, all powerful. Never before had those words held such power for Maya.
"No churning?" Out before she could stop the words.
Well done, Maya.
The god laughed and a dark star shivered nearby. "No churning. Some myths are truly just metaphors."
"Narakasura's story certainly wasn't." There went her big mouth again.
"Unfortunately not. And we must try to put things right."
Taking that as her cue, Maya asked, "What can I do?"
"You can help me fix my mistake."
"Mistake?"
Lord Shiva nodded sadly. "Narakasura is an errant child. I should have stayed his hand a long time ago, but when a boon is given, a god is meant to keep his word no matter what." He fell silent, as if lost in his memories and Maya waited until he looked back at her again. "He was a deserving disciple. Good at heart. Loving, kind, pure of soul."
"What happened to him?" asked Maya. She'd seen the sweet little boy he had been, and knowing how he'd turned out made it all the more sad.
; "Sometimes, no matter how pure of heart one is, it is the way one accepts outside influence that matters. Narakasura's faith was so pure, so true, that I gave him the gift of a long life. The only caveat, which he himself placed, was that he should die by his mother's hand."
"And he thought it would be hard to find a mother who would willingly kill her own child." Maya recalled the very question she'd asked not too long ago.
Lord Shiva nodded, a sad smile on his lips. "He thought he had tricked me well, and perhaps he was smart about it. If he had not been swayed from his path, we would not be here today contemplating taking his life for the second time around."
"And Bana swayed him," said Maya, bitterly.
"Banasura had a big role in swaying Narakasura's faith, and his belief in the people around him. As you have witnessed for yourself."
Maya sighed. "I wish I could have changed it."
"Perhaps that could have helped." Lord Shiva nodded, but then he gave a small shake of his head. "But, sometimes destiny finds a way to put things back onto the true path."
"Then how do we fix it?"
"By ensuring Bhumi kills him, and this time by ensuring his soul is contained so he cannot be reborn."
"So he won't be allowed to be reincarnated?" Maya wondered if gods did this kind of thing often. Reincarnation was meant to be the inevitable next step, unless a soul was sent to Patala or to the Heavens.
"I do not believe he deserves the privilege. He has done great wrong, but sending him to Patala is dangerous. He has cultivated too many negative relationships that it would be like sending him home. It would not amount to punishment."
"So how would we contain his soul?" Maya wanted to ask about Bhumi, but she was a little unsure how to approach the topic.
Lord Shiva held out his fisted hand. He turned it around, palm up, and opened his fingers to reveal a little brass pot with a lid that screwed on. The container was covered in writing and Maya watched as the letters danced, shining, growing larger then fading. A dazzling spectacle of words that Maya didn't understand.
