by Pearl Tate
It’s one of those awkward subjects. If he was more aggressive, sex might be easier because he’d know what he’s doing. I could just let him lead. But my innate and learned conditioning of putting off any kind of aggressive advances may make things difficult if that was the case. I know I’d stiffen up and shut down.
After all, the last sexual experience I had was so horrible and aggressive and violent—
“Are you alright?” Before I can react to his question, he reaches down and pulls me into his lap, shifting me quickly so he can wrap his arms around me, pressing my back against his firm chest as he rocks me slowly.
“You went somewhere there, and it wasn’t good. I’m sorry if something I said scared you or made you remember something terrible.” His whispered words feather over my ear, tickling slightly. Smiling, I shift in the chair, so I can look at him and his beautiful, crystal eyes. His eyelashes are full but so light that they make him look otherworldly.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to space out like that. I don’t want to talk about it right now, but trust me when I say it wasn’t anything you did. You’ve been nothing but kind and attentive.” Staring at him, like this now—alone—I’m becoming more and more aware of the strange pulse between us. It’s a thrumming vibration that seems to set every nerve ending in my body at attention.
Mihile smiles softly, drawing my attention to his plush lips. Impulsively, I lift up slightly and press my mouth to his, pulling back instantly. I’m stunned by the jolt of awareness that shoots through my body at just that innocent gesture. I’ve kissed my parents just like that hundreds—no thousands of times—and never has it felt anything like that!
“That’s a kiss,” I stammer quickly to his frozen body that’s stiffened under me. I can’t look at him as his hair continues to float around us. Instead, I concentrate on his chest instead of the uncomfortable feeling I have from initiating such a personal gesture.
It’s wrong for me to be so forward. I’ve always held my own when I was assaulted, whether on the road or on buses. But this is different. This is the man I’ll be with for the rest of my life.
Although it hadn’t happened yet, I always knew that my parents would find and then make the choice of my future husband. We discussed it briefly when I started University, and all agreed I wasn’t ready and there was no point in making that arrangement prematurely. It would’ve been a distraction. At the time, I didn’t want someone who really interested me, to have different values and life goals. A pending marriage might encourage me to quit school.
But now, this mating has made the same arrangement happen with an even more perfect pairing. From what I’ve understood of the matings, we’re the perfect match in every way. I don’t have to worry about us not being compatible mentally or sexually. It’s the best of both worlds, and I couldn’t be more thankful at this point that I waited.
Unfortunately, the fact that we’re both virgins is a little bit more than I bargained for, even if my virginity is only mental and technically not physical. It’s hard to say exactly how far my assault went on the bus. I was never conscious enough to find out whether I was raped. But there isn’t the same stigma for men as there is for women to remain celibate until marriage, and I always assumed that my future husband would be experienced. With the way Mihile is looking at me, I may have really shocked him.
Mihile’s mouth snaps closed with a snap, and I watch his teeth grind as his jaw flexes. Is he angry that I’ve been so forward? Maybe I shouldn’t have kissed him. No one’s been super specific about their customs here on Quasar.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, looking back down at my hands I’m wringing in my lap. Opening my mouth to explain more, I’m cut off as his left hand flies up to grasp my chin and tilt my face to his. His smooth, warm lips settles onto mine, and I can’t stop the moan of appreciation as the energy between us zings pleasantly, sending waves of warmth over my face.
My hair stands on end as every part of me lights up in anticipation as he pulls back. I don’t want to stop. I want to kiss and experience everything that there can be between us.
“Was that correct?” My lids flutter open slowly, and my eyes lock with his, staring at me from only inches away. As I start to nod, I realize he’s still holding my chin just as he releases it to smooth my hair back from my temple with his fingers, sending another sensation cascading over me.
“Y-yes,” I stammer. “Except…” My eyes widen as I start to think about French kissing. Using tongues and pressing against him… just the mental idea has me realizing that I’m wet between my legs—aroused.
This is a first. Something that I’ve never experienced before. The closest to arousal I’ve ever felt is reading the love stories my mother hides in her nightstand. Every once in a while I go in and “borrow” one of them for a day or two. She’s never noticed.
But this is different. This is me… with a man…
“Except?” His voice is deep as it rumbles through my body, sending another exciting jolt of awareness right to my thighs.
When I don’t answer or even look up at him—because I’m horrified about what I’ve started—he lifts my chin again until my eyes lock onto his without my free will. It’s just… instinctive. What if he thinks I’m complaining? That he did something wrong?
His brow is furrowed above me, and he looks concerned as he stares seriously without blinking. Taking a deep breath, I try to explain. “ Uh… sometimes… when people kiss and they’re together…”
My voice trails off. I’m making a fool of myself. How the hell do I explain this?
“When they’re together as lovers? Like mates?” I nod at his leading question, swallowing hard again.
“Yes. Sometimes they open their mouths and use their tongues.” Licking my lips, my eyes drop to his lips involuntarily. Squirming slightly, I drop my eyes, unwilling to even watch and see what he thinks of this piece of information.
“Have you done this before?” Mihile’s voice is hesitant but he continues quickly. “Not that it’d be bad… but maybe you could show me?”
As soon as his tentative speech is translated, I look up at him quickly, wondering if I’ve come across as experienced. I don’t think I have. I definitely haven’t been forward. Maybe just because I seem to know what I’m talking about?
“Oh… no. Not personally. But I’ve seen it done,” I hurry to explain. “Others, you know. And on television… shows, you know?” I cringe as I realize he probably has no idea what I’m talking about, but they must have something similar, right? They’re so much more advanced than we are technologically.
“Well,” he laughs a bit, while the translator waits for his next words. “You have that on me. I’ve never seen anyone ‘kiss.’” He laughs again, but his hands have begun to stroke my arm and back. “Would you be willing to show me? Like you did with the other kiss?”
I feel as if I’m breathing too fast, excitement and nervousness making me lightheaded. I can do this. This will be exciting, and there isn’t any pressure, right? He won’t even know if I’m doing it wrong. Heck, I won’t even know if I’m doing it wrong!
Nodding, I run my right hand up his chest until it circles his neck, amazed at the cashmere feel to his skin. It’s not smooth like ours. There must be small hairs that give it this plush feeling.
The hair on his head is going wild, totally releasing itself from the tight style he originally had it in when we arrived. Sitting up straighter, I pull myself toward him, and he reciprocates by leaning forward until our lips meet again. Pressing them lightly together, I open my mouth slightly, lapping bashfully at his lips and he opens to me immediately.
There’s no way I can express the literal shock that I feel between us. Our tongues slide together, and the sensation is something I couldn’t describe even if I needed to. Arousing and tantalizing, I immediately want more, and he must feel the same because his tongue plunges deeper, both our mouths widening as my head spins, tilting to the side to give him more access.
I’m barely noticing the way my breasts are crushed forward against his chest as he clutches me tightly to him, dipping his tongue into my mouth slowly. It doesn’t feel awkward or wrong. In fact, when he moans, I part my mouth more. Everything is tingling. My skin feels hypersensitive as every nerve ending snaps to life. It’s as if I’ve just woken up and drank an entire pot of coffee by myself.
When he pulls away, panting, I realize I’m gasping as well. We stare at each other as our breath mingles. I’m shocked.
My hands are buried against his neck, digging into the cords of muscle. I release them, apologizing profusely. “I’m sorry about that! I didn’t realize—”
He begins laughing as the mechanical voice repeats my words in his language. “You shouldn’t be apologizing.” His arms loosen, and I realize he’s holding my butt in his hands. “That was…”
“Mind blowing?” I fill in when he pauses, still staring into my eyes as he lowers me back down his body so my butt is returned to his legs. As I settle against him, I can feel the ridge of his cock, and it’s as large and intimidating as his height.
Nodding slightly, he studies my face. “I had to wait for the translation of your language on that. It must be slang, but the download I was able to access for the Earth languages in our archives is complete.” His hands run down my legs, where he squeezes gently. “We should return to the others. It’s time to make our way to meet up with your friends. Unfortunately, I can sense others of my kind heading toward this place—”
“Really? You can tell that?” I ask breathlessly, still recovering from our encounter. I’m certainly interested in pursuing more between us, but I don’t want to be caught by his mother! “How can you tell? Who is it?”
“Just Sanctuary Helpers who’ve no doubt been sent to check the rooms and make sure that I haven’t returned here.” Mihile helps me to my feet as I slide off his body to the floor, noticing for the first time that he put together a bag of some sort when he got dressed. He moves quickly to grab it before ushering me to the door. “Let’s make sure that we’re not here where they arrive.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
- Mihile
I look around the room that I’ve spent my entire life growing up in. Happy memories are embedded in these walls. Everything from classes with my tutors and teachers to instructions in daily reflections on our history tumble through my mind. Taking a deep breath, I commit them to memory. So many years I spent here sightless that it doesn’t have the same effect just looking. Most memories are embedded in my sense of smell.
I don’t know when I’ll make it back here—if ever. I’ve been noticing some figures moving through the tunnels not far from where we came in. It’s hard to explain how I can sense them, and I’m somewhat worried about telling the others. When we reach the library, everyone has spread out and is using different consoles. As I share what I sense, I’m not questioned.
“Can you tell us how to get to the east side of the Sanctuary?” Selas doesn’t act surprised that I know others are moving toward us, but I’m not sure where he means. Sinking down into a chair next to him, I watch as he pulls up a map on his handheld device. It shows a rudimentary outline of some of the underground tunnels but only a fraction of what I know is there. “We need to get here.”
Pointing to a part of the city I’d no idea existed until my new perception developed, I close my eyes and let my my internal vision take me on a trip outside of it all, shooting up to see the quickest way to circumvent the deep-colored bodies heading our way. As I study the colorful glow signifying the entities moving closer, I see that the mated couples glow with an entirely different shared color.
Well, that makes it easy to see who’s much more likely to be a friend or foe. Rising higher, I notice a clump of energy fields that match Selas in the area he’d like to get to. It only takes a moment for me to orientate myself before I snap my eyes open. Tara squeezes my hand from where she’s lightly resting it against me.
Flipping my hand over, I nod curtly at Selas, saying in English, “I have it. We should go. Now.”
Everyone jumps up to follow me at astonishing speed. The fear is palpable in the room, although I’ve no idea whether the group coming this way is carrying anything that could stop us. The only thing I worry about is them knowing something about shamans and what I’m personally capable of. They may know a way to incapacitate me.
Clearly, energy isn’t the way. Now that I’ve discovered how to embrace and use the energy, putting more into my system will only make me stronger. I have to admit that the longer I’m with Tara, the stronger I feel, as well. It’s as if a piece of the puzzle of my life has slipped into place.
Swinging her into my arms, she gives off a squeak before arguing, “I can walk.”
“Yes, I know, but you can’t see as well as I can or move as quickly.” I’m already walking down the hall toward the other exit I know is located in my mother’s room.
Everyone’s talking dies out as they enter the large, cavernous space, trailing in behind me. I don’t stop to take in the grandiose space like I did the first time I’d had access after my vision appeared. There are paintings on all the walls and the ceiling. Elaborate stories done by artists of the history of our people.
Murmurs follow me as I stride through the room, passing an intricate statue that’s as large as the room we just crossed through. Everyone comments on the large protruding arms that extend out, reaching high above our heads, but I ignore them all until I reach the far wall where a lever is hidden behind a decorative ledge.
Pulling the lever, the entire decorative offset slides open. Filing through, I pass the thick slab that hides the entrance, commenting to Selas behind me. “Hold this as you enter, but the last one through should be sure this falls back and seals.”
Numerous males flick on lights that expose the narrow passage we’re entering. These tunnels circumvent many of the main passages, clearly an escape route for the more elite, but they’ll tie into the loops at some point.
I lose track of time as we weave through the tunnels, and except for the stifling heat occasionally making us sweat, it’s uneventful. Before long, we’ve reached the tunnel that runs alongside the one where all the colorful energy signatures are emanating from. Locating one of the access ladders up the sheer wall, I wave to it and let Selas know. “This’ll take us up and over to the other side. We need to scale it, and we’ll come into that shaft from above.”
It doesn’t take long for us to all take a turn, climbing up and over to drop through a narrow hole into the much wider tunnel. Just as Matthias, who was bringing up the rear, joins us, I point out that one of the mated males is coming within calling distance to Selas.
“Selas! It’s great to see you!” As Selas is pulled into a hug, I hear many of the males begin whispering.
“That’s Bren.”
“Bren Khar, the captain of the Discovery.”
Tara’s arms tighten around my neck, directing my attention back to her. It’s been difficult for me to ignore the tingling and tightening in my groin that she’s invoked since she showed me her “kissing.” It was the most erotic act I’ve ever experienced. Even now, I want to set her down and find someplace to show her exactly how she affects me.
I’m not sure she’d welcome the aggressive and dominating thoughts running through my head, but since I’ve had to set her down to climb over, she’s been visiting with Karen, April, and Susan. Some of it I’ve overheard, probably because my hearing is so attuned to her. It’s clear from the confidential topic that they didn’t expect their low voices to carry to anyone else. But I’m happy to hear them talking to her about completing the mating, and she seems open to the idea.
“Bren, this is Mihile.” Selas pulls me forward, introducing me to the first male to ever develop mating marks. His name has been spoken in whispers around me by all the males from what Mattahis said is a group called The Proscribe Movement. They gather when they can, sharing information and details about current laws an
d what is being discussed by the Council that could help or hinder the male society as a whole.
The Proscribe Movement keeps records on family lines, including abusive relationships. They track males who haven’t been seen and may need to be checked on. From the sounds of it, there are very few males who are not involved, and even though the Council and females know about the group, overhearing gossip and discussions, they don’t know exactly where they’re based.
Or they didn’t. Their headquarter’s location was just discovered and that was a first. For the most part, they’re ignored and considered harmless.
“Mihile, it’s great to meet you. I’ve heard you’ve been invaluable help both at getting everyone out of some tight spots and also in locating where Hannah and I are in the city. Welcome, everyone.” Bren lifts his voice to include the entire crowd as he starts to walk back to an access ladder embedded in the stone wall. “This ladder goes right up into the ambassador suite that the Council set us up at. Hannah was able to claim diplomatic ambassador treatment due to her Earth heritage and the other mated females have follow her example. There are three other mated couples with us that are sharing a dwelling in the building. There’s been a real influx and backlog of recording new Mate Leads due to the matings that happened while we were at Dactyles. It’s kept the record keepers busy.”
Everyone follows his loud voice up the ladder where we exit onto another level. “It’s up to you whether you want to come into the suites with us. It’ll probably be a little crowded, but we’re waiting for the Council to get back to us about our next requested meeting about the Marel. As you can imagine, since we’ve been declared traitorous, they’re building a case against us, so we don’t plan to stick around and find out the outcome of that.”
Following him up a staircase now, we stop at different levels, passing other mated males I’ve never seen before. There are so many of us! I’m relieved… and awed.
