by Fiona Price
"Matt, I'm leading a major crimes task force in Miami. If you need to leave here, you're more than welcome to work with me. We could use you, buddy. It'll be new scenery, new air, maybe it'll be good for you."
"Okay, I'm in. I don't need a second thought. If you stay here with me for another few days to help me get my shit together, I'll go back with you to Miami."
"It's a deal, Matt."
A little over a week later, Matt and Shane were driving a U-Haul down to Miami with Matt's things in tow. The ride was mostly silent, and Matt spent the trip clutching the box of Kelly's things on his lap. The box contained her badge, the photos from her desk, a hair scarf, her NYPD windbreaker, and some of the other things she left in her drawer. Shane knew Matt was never going to let go. He was never going to forget. If all Matt had was a floral silk hair scarf and a badge, he was going to hold on to that with every cell in his body. He could move on better if he could still hold on to a piece of her.
Matt left Brooklyn, and he never went back.
Matt was sobbing on his front porch step, finally coming clean and telling Alissa everything. He had never talked about how Kelly died with anyone, or how he felt afterwards, or what Shane had done for him. He had nightmares about it, and replayed it again and again, but he had never told anyone before what it was like to see Kelly's body on the roof of a car, surrounded by glass and blood. He never told anybody how he spent a week drinking through the day and through the night in his apartment and would have drunk himself to death if Shane hadn't shown up.
Alissa didn't even have words for Matt. There was nothing she could say in that situation. She had to process everything she was told, too. Matt confided in her by telling her what really happened, and it was a lot. Matt was traumatized.
"I don't know how they got this picture, and I sure as hell don't know what they want you or me to get from that. I don't understand how the world can still be taking from Kelly, and she's been dead for years. But, I sure as hell know that Andrei is going to pay, Alissa." Matt concluded.
"I don't know either, but I can promise you we're going to end it." Alissa whispered.
"I know we are. And do you know what, Alissa? If she were here, Kelly would have loved you. You have the same heart that she had. You remind me so much of her."
"I'm just sorry you can't have her instead." Alissa said. "I don't think I could ever compare. She sounds incredible."
"She really was. And boy, did I love her, but not as much as I love you right now." Matt spoke, kissing Alissa's forehead and then her lips. Then, Alissa's phone rang on the concrete. She set it down next to her as Matt was telling the story of Kelly.
"Shane, now is not a good time." Alissa answered.
"Did you get something out of Matt?" Shane asked.
"Yes, but again, it's not a good time."
"What does that mean, Alissa?"
Alissa kissed Matt and stood up, finishing the call at the end of the driveway.
"Well, Matt told me everything about Kelly, and I can't just rush back to the office now. We're both still crying, I can't just leave."
"Did you find out anything about why that picture would be in your folder, or anything of that sort? We still have a case to solve."
"And, it can wait. I'm going to spend the rest of the night with Matt. There's not much we can do right this moment, Shane, and it's important to me that I stay with matt right now."
"Okay, it can hold off until morning. We're not sure what it all means, if we're being actively watched, so stay sharp and maybe sleep with one eye open tonight. I'll see you tomorrow, Alissa." Shane compromised. Alissa walked back up the driveway.
"Does that animal want you to go right back and report your findings to him right now?"
"Nope. I told him I wouldn't. Come on, Matt, let's go inside. I think we should pick up right where we left off. Kissing on the couch tends to be the fix for anything." Alissa smiled, holding Matt's hands as he got up from his front porch stoop and they headed back inside together to enjoy the rest of the evening. They knew that in the morning, they'd be tracking down Andrei and his crime family and wouldn't stop until it was over, so they took the few hours of rest. Alissa also took Shane's advice and slept lightly, aware that they weren't fully safe until Andrei and Brianna and whoever the hell else was working with them were in jail.
Shane and Vicki worked through the night, searching for the missing pieces of the puzzle that would solve the murder cases and disclose their location. Shane was tired of playing games with them, he meant business and would stop at nothing to finally put an end to the nonsense. He couldn't sleep knowing he and his team were being targeted, anyway. Though his personal philosophy stated that nothing good ever happens after two in the morning, he pushed for answers and was not disappointed. When Matt and Alissa arrived back at the office, they weren't short on a game plan.
"Okay, tell us what you found out last night."
"It's a lot, but we've finally made some solid connections. Vicki helped me put the pieces of the puzzle together. So, here's what we know," Shane answered, pulling up some images and documents on his computer and lining up the papers in front of them.
"We know that they were here running the family business out of Miami and they killed three people. We were able to identify who the shooter was from various security footage and using biometrics to match height and weight and other physical features to match it to a member of his crew. We ran facial recognition on all his known associates, specifically the footage from the diner. They were careful and knew where to sit where the camera would have the hardest time getting a clear image of their faces, but we got results. Andrei's hitman is the one that sits across from him at the diner, and he's got quite the profile in Armenia. He's done stints in and out of jail for aggravated assault, robbery, and then he joined Andrei's crew shortly after he was released from prison. If we can find him, we can put him away for triple homicide." Shane explained, focusing on that character in Andrei's game first. Vicki took over next.
"We were able to backtrack the origin of the envelopes that were delivered here, which was yours, Alissa, and Shane's in the parking lot. The office mail carrier told us that Alissa's unmarked envelope was in her mailbox in the mailroom, and nobody had remembered putting it there, because of course it didn't have a name on it. We were then able to identify another one of Andrei's crew, he's with them at the diner and he knocked out an employee, stole his keycard to get access to the mail room, slipped in the envelope and then returned the card. We can assume he delivered all of our envelopes."
"We ran the prints on the knife I got in mine, and it does match Vanessa, Brianna, you know. That's a damning piece of evidence."
"We don't think that the content of our folders has some secret meaning other than the fact that they can get to us, so we focused more on finding Andrei and Brianna now. We tracked their financials and hit a lot of dead ends, they're good at covering their tracks, but not so good that we couldn't find them. A private charter plane left Miami and is headed for Hawai'i, and we got ahold of the passenger manifest. It's them. Brianna's white BMW was found burned out this morning by the Miami fire department, they matched the plates. They were done with the car, so they got rid of it and any evidence left inside. Andrei took out a lot of cash, which we won't be able to track, but we have to assume he's going to use it to get a house in Hawai'i and lay low, starting his business all over again down there."
"I've got ears with the Honolulu police department, and we're bringing them on to our case. We'll soon have to go down to Hawai'i, for sure, but we should get everything together here and not move in until we have a rock-solid plan with strong intel. We want to take them down, not miss anything, and do it right. Organized crime is always backed by money, so we'll keep looking at their accounts to see if there's any fraudulent activity, but we can take them down for blackmailing, murder, and attempted murder."
"Wait, I just figured out the envelopes." Alissa said, coming to a lightbulb conclu
sion.
"What is it?"
"It's supposed to remind of us of everyone we lost. I got a picture of Carly, who was killed, you got the knife that they think killed Matt, Matt lost Kelly and I got their picture, it's all about losing the people we love. Shane, you or Vicki could be next, since Vicki got your wedding pictures in her envelope. It's loss, guys. It's a threat." Alissa pulled together.
"Then we're not going to hesitate any further. Pack up your gear, guys, we're not going to sit here in Miami, waiting for action. We're going to Hawai'i and we're going to be close when shit starts to go down. I refuse to let them run away and take refuge. We're going to go to them and end this thing."
"What, like, now-now?"
"Yeah. Our murderers are on the run. Nobody threatens my team without facing the consequences. Let's get ready."
Taking Shane's direction, they took a group trip down to their storage rooms where their tactical gear was stored. Alissa pulled out her Kevlar vest that had her Velcro name label on it, and began filling each pocket with the necessities.
"Shane, how heavy are we packing?" Alissa asked.
"As much as you can fit in." Shane responded, and Alissa took that instruction and began getting her thigh and ankle holsters ready. It wasn't long before each team member was fully prepared, and they gathered together again.
"When are we leaving, Shane? It just feels a little rushed, but I trust you." Alissa asked.
"Okay. You're right, it's a bit rushed. Let me coordinate with HPD, let’s get our affairs in order here before we leave, but let's plan to leave tomorrow and we'll continue our investigation there." Shane responded. It gave Matt a chance to find a dog sitter for Dieter and for everything to sink in. They had no idea what kind of danger they were in, but they knew that once they landed on Oahu, they were going to face it head-on. Matt and Alissa held hands as they sat next to each other on the plane, nervous, but ready to find closure in Hawai'i.
XVI
The flight was long, and with their layover flight in California, most of the team fell asleep on the trip there. But not Matt, nor Shane. Shane couldn't sleep knowing that their business was unfinished, and he felt vulnerable. It felt wrong to sleep when he felt an obligation to his team to think of every possible attack against them, and to prepare for it. He felt like he couldn't sleep, because he owed it to them to be their leader, to know everything. It weighed heavily on his heart.
Matt couldn't sleep because he knew he'd have to face Vanessa. He felt guilty, he felt like he should have known better than to fall for Vanessa. He knew there was no way of knowing who she really was, but he was still disappointed in himself that he wasn't able to see it. He still hurt Alissa, and that hurt him worst of all. He wished he had a crystal ball or a time machine that would take him back and prevent it all from happening. Maybe he wouldn't have almost died.
Matt always liked to put it on Shane every time he was put in danger or was shot, since Shane really was a danger magnet. But, this time Matt had nobody to blame but himself. The decisions he made led him right into the tiger's mouth, and it almost ruined everyone.
Matt wasn't sure if he would ever be able to go back into the field after Kelly died. He didn't know what his life would be like, how he would be able to do his job with the weight of the guilt of her death on his shoulders. But, with Shane's help, he was able to get back to some sense of normalcy. He thought that it was the worst he could possibly get, that nothing would ever top his guilt and his drinking and his mental state, but he felt himself veering in that direction again. Alissa wasn't physically gone, but he knew that things may never be the same again.
He just wished he could go back and do it all again. He wished he could do it differently. Even when Alissa was right next to him, he could still feel that she wasn't really there with him. She had a lot to recover from, and Matt knew that. He didn't know how to fix it. He didn't know how to fix her.
He knew that taking down Andrei and Brianna, though he knew her as Vanessa, would only make so much of a difference. They wouldn't be in immediate danger anymore, but Matt felt that the threats against them wasn't the only thing impacting them. It was only part of the problem, and the part he couldn't fix would maybe never be fixed.
Shane's exhausted eyes met Matt's from across the plane, and they both saw a familiar face staring back at them; the face of self-doubt and regret. It was an ugly thing, and it was taking a toll on all of them. Shane was desperate. He would have given anything to not be responsible for the weight of the world, but he couldn't shake the dedication to his team. He felt obligated to keep his family safe, and whatever he did was never enough for him. It was a constant battle between him and himself, trying to reach a goal for something that was unavoidable. He couldn't protect everyone he loved at all times from everything. That ate away at him, but there was nothing he could do about it.
When they landed in Hawai'i, it was a hazy, warm morning. They greeted the Aloha state with heavy, tired eyes, and they wished they could enjoy the tropical paradise. The Honolulu police department set them up with a safe house where they could continue their investigation and rest before going in for the main operation. Shane spent a good amount of time at the HPD precinct, organizing their case with HPD's case and gathering their resources. Alissa tried to unwind by taking a short swim in the pool, clearing her mind under the quiet water. Matt couldn't do the same. He was sitting on the pool edge, his feet in the water, but the tension was so high between the team, there was no real unwinding.
Alissa came up to the surface of the water and rested against the pool deck next to Matt.
"Alissa, I don't know how I feel about this operation."
"What do you mean, Matt?"
"I've just been thinking about Kelly and how I lost her. I know I almost lost you with something I could have prevented, it was something I had done, but I don't think I can lose you to Andrei. I won't let him. But, I don't even want to give him the chance to get to you."
"Matt, you're not going to lose me. I can almost promise that. We aren't going into this blind, we know a lot about what we're getting into. I can protect myself, and I know you're protecting me too. I understand what you're feeling. What happened to Kelly was horrible and unexpected and I know it's raw since we just brought it back to the surface. I won't let that happen again."
Matt didn't even have words to respond to Alissa. He would just feel better when it was all over. He was used to having a target on his head, but Andrei had hit a nerve in Matt, and he was more aware than ever that it wasn't an idle threat. He was in danger.
"I don't know, Alissa, I just want you. This job, it never used to affect me like this until you came along. In any other case, I'd go in with Shane with reckless abandon because I never had anything to go back to. Now, now I've got something to lose, and that's you. That means more to me than anything. I want this all to be over, but in order for that to happen, I have to risk losing you. I have to risk everything."
There was a long pause between them before he leaned down to kiss Alissa.
"There's nothing we can really do right now so I'm going to try and get some sleep."
His voice radiated a tired frustration to Alissa. She looked up to meet his face, and his blue eyes were barely shining like they usually were.
"You better, Matt. Same with Shane, whenever the hell he gets back. I know this takes a lot from you guys, but the best way you can help keep us safe is to take care of yourself first." Alissa responded. Matt pulled his legs out of the water and rolled down his pant legs before walking back into their room, laying down on the bed and wishing for sleep to crash down upon him. Alissa looked out onto the ocean that surrounded them on all sides, and was soon joined by Vicki.
"Hey, Liss. What are you thinking about?" Vicki asked, sitting down next to her.
"I don't know, Vicki. Everything and nothing all at once. I'm really worried about Matt, and I'm sure you can see that in Shane, too. Matt's thinking about Kelly, and I know he sees a lot of
parallels between that situation and this one now."
"Shane hasn't slept in days. There's no way I can convince him that he doesn't have to feel so obligated to the world. Frankly, I don't think the world deserves him at all. He gives so much, and I don't want the world to keep taking advantage of him. You know, we haven't even had our honeymoon. He feels like he can't take a day off, or else something will happen that he could have prevented, and that's his worst-case scenario. He needs to be the hero, he needs to fix things, and I don't think I can ever forgive the world for making him feel that way. He will wear himself down until his bones turn to dust, and for just one minute I want the world to just stop."
There was silence between the two girls, and the Lieutenant watched Vicki brush away a tear from her eye. She wanted nothing more than for her husband to have a single moment of relief from the pressure of the world, the pressure to save everyone that crossed his path. She knew that he did so much good for others, but what was it costing him? What was the price he had to pay?
Vicki questioned if it was worth it at all.
"You know, Matt asked me to move in with him the other day. After he was released from the hospital. We were sitting on his couch, watching the news and cuddling his dog. I don't know if in my life I've ever felt more at home. I could never just lay on the couch with Alex. It was such a regular, mundane activity, but with Matt it felt right. I could just be, and nothing else mattered. I don't know if that's the only moment like that I'll ever have, but I felt at peace. I didn't have to think about anything or anyone, and it was just us. On days like this where he's so stressed that I know he can't breathe, I don't know if we can ever go back to that peaceful place."
