Sweet and Sassy Baby Love
Page 83
“She’s manipulative as hell. Do you really think I want to be married to a woman like that?”
Lilli realized she needed to get her questions answered, or she would be victimized by her doubts forever. She took a deep breath and braced herself. “I think I need to know your stand on fidelity in our marriage. Since this isn’t a love match, do you consider yourself free to have—” she forced the word from her tight throat “—affairs?”
His face turned to stone. “Absolutely not. Once we marry, you will be the only woman in my bed and I will be the only man in yours. I take my vows very seriously. If you can’t make the same kind of commitment, then you’d better tell me, because I’ll expect the same complete fidelity that I’ll give.”
His fierce response took her breath away. Perhaps she should have known. A man like Max wouldn’t make a marital commitment easily and he would not only give, but expect to receive complete loyalty from his wife.
“I can’t even imagine being unfaithful to you.” What woman would want to?
His expression gentled a millimeter and he picked up the ring. “Then you won’t need to take this off ever again,” he said and slid the diamond on her finger. “I’m giving you and your baby my name and adopting him. Our marriage will work. I’ve decided it will,” he said. “Understand?”
Even though there was no judge or minister present, at that very moment, she felt as if they were exchanging vows. He was making a promise he would keep and she was doing the same. “Yes, I understand.”
The following day, Max arranged for the prenup to be changed. Lilli signed it. Surprising her again, Max sent a white silkd dress with a voluminous amount of material beneath the Empire waist that allowed for her advanced pregnancy. Her stomach jumped with butterflies. She told herself to put aside her fears, but in the back of her mind, although she feared that Max would take his commitments seriously, she knew he might never grow to love her.
A dull nagging ache in her back and those dancing butterflies continued to distract her, but she was determined to be as beautiful a bride for Max as possible. She clipped her hair back in a half up-do and added a fresh pink rose above the clip.
The ceremony was truly private with only the judge and Jim Gregory and Myrtle serving as witnesses. The weather was beautiful as usual and she and Max said their vows on the patio where they’d shared dinner the first night she’d stayed at his house. There was something right about that, something right in knowing they would share many more dinners on the very spot where they’d made lifelong promises to each other.
She told herself not to worry, but her hands were cold with nerves as Max held them.
“I pronounce you husband and wife,” the judge said. “You may now kiss the bride.”
Max drew her against him and slowly covered her mouth with his in a kiss that echoed the promises they’d just made.
Afterward, they shared a private lunch on the patio, just the two of them and toasted their marriage with sparkling water and orange juice.
“To us and our life together,” he said.
She nodded. “To us.” She took a long sip then another, her mind reeling with what she’d just done. She’d just married a man who cared for her, but didn’t love her.
“You’re very quiet.”
She nodded again. “It’s a big day. A lot to think about,” she managed.
“You can relax now. We’ll have more to think about after the baby is born. After your recovery.”
He was talking about sex, she realized. There would be no night of passion tonight. One more way this day was odd. “The doctor told me that’s usually four to six weeks,” she said, feeling her cheeks heat.
He covered her hand with his and her heart took an extra beat. “Where would you like to honeymoon? We can go anywhere you like.”
“I haven’t even thought about it,” she said.
He stroked the inside of her wrist. “You should. By the time we go on ours, we will have both earned it. Yes?”
Her chest tightened at the sight of his hand caressing hers. “I guess you’re right.”
“So tell me where you’d like to go,” he said.
She fought a sudden shyness. “Somewhere with a beach?”
He nodded. “The company has resorts all over, but I also have access to some private spots. We would have staff, but no one else around to intrude.”
“That sounds nice,” she managed. “I wish it could be sooner.”
He gave a rough chuckle. “You and me both, sweetheart.” He sighed and lifted her hand to his lips. “The anticipation will either kill us or make the experience explosive.”
“Or both,” she said.
He laughed again. “We should eat.”
Her stomach still doing dips and turns, Lilli picked at the meal. Her back was hurting like the dickens. She shifted uncomfortably in her chair.
“Is something bothering you?” he asked.
“I hate to complain, but my back hurts and—” She sighed. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s the excitement, but I don’t feel very hungry at all.” She felt a sudden telltale surge of liquid and stared at him startled.
“What is it?”
“I think I’m in labor. Real labor, this time,” she added. “I think my water broke.”
Her announcement galvanized Max into action. The wide-eyed expression of fear on her face clutched at his gut. He immediately told his driver to start the car and grabbed the suitcase Lilli had packed after her experience with false labor.
Hustling her into the backseat of the town car within three minutes, he slid in beside her and made the call to Lilli’s doctor. He got the answering service since it was a Saturday. “Lilli McCall is going to the hospital right now. I don’t care who is on call. I expect to see Dr. Roberts at the hospital. My name is Max De Luca. I’m her husband.”
He disconnected his cell and turned to find Lilli staring at him. “That’s not how on call works. If you deliver on a weekend, you don’t necessarily get your specific doctor.”
“Not my wife,” Max said.
She blinked and shook her head. “I’m not used to the idea of being your wife.”
“I’ll help you,” he said in a dry tone. “Do you need to lie down?”
She shook her head and winced. “I’m too uncomfortable to lie down. The contractions are much stronger than they were with the false labor.” Fear glinted in her eyes. She bit her lip and reached for his hand. “Max, I’m going to have a baby. I want him to be okay.”
He pulled her into his arms. “He will be.”
Within two hours of arriving at the hospital, Max could tell that Lilli was suffering. Her body tensed in pain. With each contraction, she stared straight ahead and did the breathing she’d learned in her prepared childbirth classes.
Her fingernails dug into his hands during the height of the pains. The sight of her dealing with such pain horrified him. He’d never known modern childbirth was so barbaric. A newfound respect for Lilli grew inside him.
“I think I want an epidural,” she announced breathlessly after what looked like an excruciating contraction.
Relieved, he immediately called the nurse and demanded the medication.
After what felt like forever, the obstetrician checked Lilli’s progress and shook her head. “Too late for an epidural.”
Outraged, Max stood. “What do you mean too late? She’s in pain. She needs medication and she’ll damn well have it.”
The doctor shot him a long-suffering look. “Mr. De Luca, the baby is crowning. Your wife is ready to deliver.”
His wife. His son. The knowledge hit him like a ton of bricks. Within thirty minutes and what had to be a thousand pushes, the baby, a small squalling mass of humanity, made his entrance into the world.
The baby cried. Lilli cried. Max swore. Seconds later, Lilli held her son, their son, in her arms. “You’re here,” she said to the baby, touching each of his tiny fingers and toes. “You’re really here.” She looked up at Max, her
eyes filled with tears. “Look. We did it.”
Max shook his head. “You did all the work. I didn’t do anything.”
“Yes, you did,” she said. “You were here for me. For him. You watched over me. I want you to hold him.”
Max gingerly took the baby in his arms and looked down into the infant’s face. “Nice hat,” he said of the tiny blue cap the nurse had placed on his head. “He’s—” Max paused. “He’s pink.”
Lilli laughed. “That’s a good thing. It means he’s healthy.”
Max gave a slow nod and studied the baby. “Little hands. Soft skin. What are we going to call you? There’s got to be something better than butter bean.” He glanced at Lilli. “Do you know what you’re going to name him?”
Lilli felt something inside her quiver and shake. Watching Max hold her son made her bones shift.
The baby waved a hand toward Max and he looked surprised. “Hi there,” he said in a low voice. “Looks like your mom did an excellent job.”
Lilli bit her lip as she felt another stabbing urge to cry.
Max returned the baby to her arms. “He looks perfect.”
“Thank you,” she said, blinking against threatening tears. “I think I want to name him David.”
He nodded. “Excellent choice. Solid. Not trendy or ambiguous. He won’t have to beat anyone up on the playground to defend his name.”
She took a careful breath and watched his face. “And for his middle name, I was thinking of Maximillian.”
He stared at her for a long moment in silence.
The longer the silence lasted the more nervous Lilli felt. Even the baby squirmed in her arms. “If it’s okay with you,” she added. “If you don’t want that, then—”
“No, I do. I’m just surprised. I wondered if you would name him after Tony.”
“You have already been more of a father to him than your brother could have ever been.”
The next month passed in a blur of nursing, bottles, diapers and middle-of-the night interruptions. Lilli fell head over heels in love with her son, but when she showed the first sign of weariness, Max insisted she choose a mother’s helper. Although she fought the idea at first, Lilli couldn’t deny that getting a full night of rest made her feel like a new woman.
Since the baby had been born, Max continued to sleep in his room and she slept in hers. It seemed as though he was at work all the time. At first, she’d been too tired to focus on it, but now she was starting to get nervous. The more she thought about it, the more she realized he’d barely touched her during the last few weeks. Had his desire for her waned? Now that she was a mother, had she somehow become less sexy? The notion tortured her.
Unable to stand their polite distance any longer, she waited up for him one night. She sat in the dark, drinking her first glass of wine in months, rehearsing her conversation. She’d carefully chosen a silky camisole top and flowing blue skirt that made her feel feminine. She’d even put on a little makeup to perk up her features.
Sitting in the den, she turned on the lamp beside her and flipped through an architectural magazine. With only the soft glow from a lamp to keep her company, nine o’clock passed, then nine-thirty, then ten o’clock, but she was determined to wait for him.
It was close to ten-thirty when Max dragged himself through the door from the garage. He rubbed the back of his tense neck. These late hours were going to kill him.
But it wasn’t as if he had any choice. He sure as hell couldn’t hang around the house. Now that Lilli had delivered the baby, he had no visual reminder of why he couldn’t take her to bed.
He would be an inconsiderate bastard to take her before she was fully recovered. That left him with the option of playing an exhausting game of keep-away. Sighing, he tugged his tie loose the rest of the way and unbuttoned the top few buttons on his shirt. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a light from the den. Curious, he walked into the room and found Lilli sleeping, her arms wrapped around a large throw pillow.
A stab of hunger twisted his gut. Lord help him, he was jealous of that damn pillow. He wanted her wrapped around him.
Her skirt had risen above her knees, revealing her shapely legs, and the material clung with sensual ease over her feminine curves. A strand of her hair had fallen over her cheek.
She was so inviting it was all he could do not to carry her up to his room right then. Instead, he tempted his self-control by lifting his fingers to touch that silky strand of hair and slide it away from her cheek.
Her lashes fluttered and she gradually opened her eyes. Her sexy, dazed expression lingered a few seconds before it cleared. “Hi,” she said with a trace of self-consciousness and pushed herself up from the pillow. “I must have fallen asleep.”
He nodded. “You’re dressed up. Did you have plans?”
Her cheeks warmed with color and she pushed her hair from her face. “I was waiting up for you.”
Surprise kicked through him and he sat down beside her. “Why? Is there a problem with David? Is the mother’s helper still working out?”
“No problem with Maria. She’s perfect. David is perfect,” she added and paused. “Although I would like you to spend a little more time with him.”
He nodded. “I can do that. I just wanted to give the two of you time to get adjusted first.”
She bit her lip and met his gaze. “Is that why you’ve also been avoiding me?”
“Caring for an infant is demanding, plus you need to recover from the birth.”
She continued to look at him as if she were waiting for him to add something more. When he didn’t, she sighed. “You’re sure that’s all there is?”
He frowned. “What else would there be?”
She bit her lip again. “I wasn’t sure if perhaps you were having second thoughts about getting married. If, maybe…” She faltered then lifted her chin as if she were determined to go on. “If you didn’t want me anymore.”
Shock zinged through him like an electrical current. “You’re joking, aren’t you?”
“No, I’m not,” she said, her voice husky. “You haven’t touched me since the baby was born. You’re always gone. What else should I think?”
“That I don’t want to ravage you like some sex-starved bastard,” he told her. “That I don’t trust myself in the same room with you for more than five minutes.”
Her eyes widened in surprise. “But you seem so detached.”
“Lilli,” he said, primitive need rising inside him, “I’ve been waiting to take you for a long time. I’m not sure how gentle I’ll be.”
Her gaze fixed on his, she licked her lips, sending another current of desire lashing through him. “So you really do still want me.”
“Yes,” he said in a voice he knew sounded rough around the edges.
Giving a sigh of relief, she moved closer to him and lifted her hand to his jaw. At her soft touch, he clenched his jaw. She rubbed her thumb over his mouth and he covered her hand with his. He slid that daring thumb of hers inside his mouth and gently bit the delicate pad.
He heard her soft intake of breath and put her hand away from him. “Don’t push me.”
She met his gaze for a long moment. “I go to the doctor on Friday.”
“For what?”
“My follow-up visit. It’s likely that I’ll be released for all normal activity.”
Wanting to remove any confusion on his part, he asked, “What does that include?”
“Everything,” she said and lowered her voice to a whisper. “Including sex.”
Max immediately felt himself grow hard with arousal. Friday. Two days. “I’d like you to give me a call after your visit,” he told her.
“I know you told me not to push you,” she said, moving closer to him again. “But can I kiss you?”
Max knew a cold shower was in his future tonight. “Come here,” he said and pulled her across his lap.
She slid her fingers through his hair and gently pressed her mouth against his.
Desire raged through him. Her lips were petal soft, her body deliciously pliant. He wanted to touch her and take her every way a man could take a woman. When she dipped her tongue into his mouth, he thought he would explode.
A simple kiss, he thought, and he felt like a raving lunatic. Her breasts pressed against his chest and he wanted to tear off her dress, rip off his shirt and feel her nipples against his skin. He rubbed his hands over the side of her breasts and felt her shiver. With that small encouragement, he slid his fingers over her nipple and felt the stiff peak through her silky top.
Making a restless movement against him, she slid her tongue deeper into his mouth. His temperature rose and he began to sweat. She was so sweet, so tempting.
He knew he should stop, but he couldn’t resist going a little further. He eased his hands under her top, surprised to find that she wore no bra. He wouldn’t have thought he could get any hotter, especially knowing they couldn’t finish tonight, but he did.
Taking control of the kiss, he slid one of his hands over her breast and swallowed her delicious gasp of arousal. “Do you want me to stop?” he asked against her mouth.
She shook her head. “It’s been so—” She broke off and shuddered when he brushed her nipple with his thumb. “I never thought I could feel this way again.”
“You couldn’t have forgotten completely,” he said in disbelief, nibbling at her bottom lip as he continued to caress her breast.
“I think I must have,” she said and reached for the buttons to his shirt.
Not trusting himself any further, he covered her hand with his. “Later,” he said. “Later.”
Looking at her smoky eyes and lips puffy from their kisses, Max groaned. It took every ounce of fortitude not to take her mouth again.
She shook her head in disbelief. “After that last terrible time with Tony, I was sure I’d never want to be with a man again.”
Max’s arousal abruptly cooled. “You’ve mentioned this before. What was terrible about it?”
She glanced away. “I don’t like to think about it. I don’t like to talk about it. It’s just that everything is so different with you.”