“And we’re all in danger, the women and the children too, aren’t we?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.
There’s a long moment of silence, a long moment of him watching me and trying to figure out if I can handle the truth or not. His silence is all the truth that I need, it’s all the answer that I need. We’re all in danger, serious fucking danger.
HAWK
My phone rings and without even looking at the name, I practically scream into it a loud and almost terrifying hello. A throat clears on the other end of the line and I want to loudly demand that whoever it is fucking talks, but I don’t. Instead, I inhale a deep breath and wait for them to speak.
“Silver was shot, Barracuda and Leo didn’t make it,” Bones announces.
“Silver?” I ask.
His throat clears before he says anything else. “He’s okay. Shoulder through and through. All the women are okay. Pinkie was a little banged up, nothing serious. They were here to make a statement. They weren’t here for true damage, not yet at least.”
“They won’t have the chance,” I snap.
I hear him chuckle, then he’s quiet for a moment. “Avah is good, I’m sitting at a table with her. Tell Gator that she and Maria hunkered down together, they’re both good.”
“Thank fuck. We’ll be back as soon as we can, gonna take care of some shit up here first.”
“I’ll bet you are.”
There’s another moment of silence, then I clear my throat. “Start thinking of another way to distribute this shit. I’m not dealing with a third party anymore. I don’t care what Dragon says, this shit is done. We take care of it in-house from now on.”
“Under-fucking-stood.”
I end the call, shoving my phone in my pocket before I turn to Gator. “Your woman is safe. She’s good. So is Mamba.”
Gator jerks his chin, but I can see the relief on his face and the wetness in his eyes before he shakes his head and all of his emotions are back in check.
“Let’s get this shit handled. I want those fucks to hurt.”
Dutch chuckles from the table in the corner of the motel room. “Oh, they’re going to suffer, though it won’t be nearly enough.”
“Agreed, at least not yet.”
Dutch lifts his head, his gaze finding mine. “We’re going to make them pay, yeah?”
I shake my head, leaning over. “We’re not going to make them just pay, Dutch,” I explain. “We’re going to make them suffer.”
“Fuck. Yes.”
I watch Dutch finish up his quick and easy homemade bombs. As much as I want to ride out there and fuck them over tonight, I decide that I have to give Jaguar the benefit of the doubt. I’ve texted him to meet me and he will or I’ll personally end him tomorrow. I’m not fucking around, not with him or anyone else.
Eventually we turn in for the night, but I doubt any of us truly sleeps, I know that I don’t. I think of Avah and wonder if she’s really okay. She hasn’t called me and the way I left things, I wonder if she even thinks I’ll come back.
Though I said I would, I could see her sadness, her resignation that I wasn’t going to return—she was right. I said I was going to come back, I declared my love for her, but I was on the edge and ready to run.
Not anymore.
She’s not only mine, she’s mine to protect and nothing makes me see that more now than almost having lost her. War is so fucking ugly, but it came at the right time. I am ready to defend my woman, my family.
The next morning, we all get up early and get ready. None of us speaks as we head toward the meeting place. Jaguar is there, a girl standing next to him, just as he promised. I’m honestly a little surprised that he actually showed and brought the girl.
She shivers standing next to him, her body trembling in what I assume is fear. She should be fucking scared.
Pulling up, I’m the first one that climbs off of my bike, heading straight toward him. I can hear Dutch and Gator behind me, but they aren’t my concern. My only concern is this possible traitorous fuck standing in front of me.
“Care to explain anything deeper?” I ask as my only greeting.
He shakes his head, lifting his hand and running his fingers through his hair. “I had no fucking idea, Hawk,” he murmurs. “None. Had I known, I would have warned Dragon. I can’t go back with you, she’s not eighteen for a few more months. But this is Marshall’s daughter, in good faith, I’m delivering her to you. If they find out I broke her out, they’ll kill me.”
“You could be a dead man walking anyway, I wouldn’t worry too much about your life as it is, Jag.”
He nods his head, his chin dipping down before he lifts it back up. “All of this is fucked. Swear to fuck, I didn’t know.”
“It’s all good. I’ll let Dragon sort that out, but you’re going to do something for us today to prove your loyalty.”
His eyes widen and I watch as he swallows heavily before he nods. “You’re going to set off the first bomb. It probably won’t kill anyone, but it might.”
“You got it.”
“Where’s your jailbait?” I ask.
His lips twist into a snarl at the nickname. It’s what she is and his cock is so hot to get inside of her, he’s got to know she’s too fucking young for his old ass. Then again, who the fuck am I to judge. I’m sticking my dick inside a woman half my age and I don’t plan on ever stopping.
“She’s in the basement. Locked her up so she’d be safe.”
My lips curve up into a grin. “You really do care, yeah?”
“She’s mine.”
“Fair enough. Let’s blow some fuckers up.”
Chapter Thirty-Nine
AVAH
Blinking, I rub my eyes, unsure that I’m seeing what I am truly seeing. It’s him. It’s Hawk riding toward me. He’s beautiful, the sunlight hitting him just perfectly as he rides closer. I don’t pay attention to the other two bikes behind him, because they don’t matter. Not to me anyway. The only thing that matters is him.
He stops, pulling into his regular spot, but I don’t move from my own place. I’m too afraid if I do, he’ll only be a mirage. Everything that happened yesterday, Silver being shot, the two men murdered, everything just made me think that he wouldn’t come back, that Hawk would use this as an excuse to walk away and exact his revenge on the men who did this.
I’m sitting in a chair, my feet in the seat, my chin resting on my knees as he climbs off of his bike and begins his approach. I don’t move, there’s no need to. Instead, I watch, still unbelieving that he came back, then immediately, I wonder how long until he does leave for good.
“Avah,” he rasps, his voice low and husky.
Blinking again, I try to keep the tears from falling, but I fail. I’ve become soft and weak since falling for him, since changing my entire life, since feeling again. I don’t say anything. Sliding my feet down, I stand, but don’t speak.
Turning from him, I walk away. I don’t know how I feel, but I do know that this life that once scared me, now terrifies me. It’s not exciting to have to hide in an office, unsure of what’s to happen next. It’s not fun to think about all of the ways that an enemy could hurt me. I’ve already been through that shit, I don’t want it to happen again.
“Avah,” Hawk snaps from behind me, his boots crunching in the sand, dirt, and rocks.
I continue to ignore him, walking around to the back of the building where I hope we’ll be alone.
“Babe,” he impatiently shouts, but I don’t stop, not until I’m leaning against the wall, using its sturdiness to hold me up.
He stands in front of me, inches away, so close that I can practically taste the sweat on his skin. Lifting my head, I look up at him, his eyes dancing with anger as he watches me. He balls his hands into fists and places them on his hips as he watches me—extremely impatiently.
“You came back,” I whisper.
“Said I would,” he immediately, and defensively, snaps.
Nodding, I lic
k my lips as I look up at him. “You weren’t going to, don’t deny it.”
“What does it matter? I’m here.”
“I could have died,” I breathe.
He closes the distance between us, his body pressing against mine, his chin dipped down as his breath fans my face, his cock hardening beneath his jeans as it presses against my stomach.
I try not to be affected by the sensation of his hard dick, but I like it way too freaking much and my thighs shake instantly with want.
“You didn’t.”
“I could have,” I exhale.
“Yeah, the senator could have killed you too and that had nothing to do with me or this club. Don’t fuckin’ run scared, Avah,” he snaps.
“I’m right here,” I mumble.
He hums, reaching down and unbuttoning my shorts. He shoves them down my legs. My panties he doesn’t even bother to push down, instead he grabs ahold of the sides and completely shreds them from my body.
Then he wraps his fingers around the backs of my thighs and picks me up. He presses my back against the wall, his mouth crushing mine in a hard and bruising kiss.
Lifting my hands, I curl my fingers at his chest, grabbing a hold of his T-shirt. Instead of pushing him away, I bring him closer, because I want so much more of him—always.
“Fuck,” he hisses as he pulls away from me. “You ain’t physically running, but honey, you’re trying to mentally check the fuck out,” he grunts.
He’s right.
I’ve been totally out of it since all the shit happened with the Donkey Puncher MC. I don’t know if I’m just finally going through the shock part of the trauma from what happened to me, or if I’m just fucking traumatized all over again and not able to process it. I don’t think it matters, to be honest, the past couple weeks have just plain scared the shit out of me.
I don’t realize what’s happening until I feel him slam inside of me. My head falls back on a gasp. Hawk’s lips touch the center of my throat before he licks the entire length. Goose bumps break out over my entire body, he stays planted deep inside of me, not moving as my body welcomes him.
“Come back to me, Avah,” he whispers against my throat.
“Don’t leave me, Orson. You were the one that wasn’t going to come back, I could feel it. I can’t live this life of yours without you.”
“I’m staying, honey.”
I hum, unsure if his words are the truth. I want to believe them, I want to believe every single word that he says. I hope that I can. I really fucking hope that it’s real, all of it. His lips brush mine as he starts to move, his pelvis grinding against me with each slow and precise thrust of his hips.
“Did some stupid shit in my past and I ran. Not again. You’re it for me, babe, and this is my life—our lives.”
“Yeah?” I exhale.
It’s about the only thing that I can say, I’m breathless, I’m speechless, I’m too lost in the feelings of us. I was terrified, but right now, with him inside of me, all my fears are gone. He soothes everything. I’m not scared, I’m not terrified, I’m just at peace.
This is such a dangerous place to be.
Lulled by a feeling of security, knowing that this man could walk away and take it from me at any moment.
HAWK
I don’t blame her for being upset. For being scared. For being traumatized and fucking terrified. Moving inside of her, I keep my eyes focused on hers, I can’t look away, watching her fear melt into need, then shift into something completely different is mesmerizing.
Love and trust.
She fucking loves me.
You can say the words love, but she means them, I can see it in the depths of her soul and fuck me, but I feel the same goddamn way. Touching my lips to hers, I don’t deepen the kiss as I continue to move, to roll my hips and give her exactly what she needs, knowing that she gives me everything I could ever need and more.
“Orson,” she breathes against my mouth.
I grunt, my hips moving faster. She whimpers against my lips, but I don’t stop. I can feel my lower back tingle and my balls draw up as I climb closer and closer, knowing that she’s just as close. I can feel it and fuck, it’s amazing as always.
With a growl, I continue to move harder, slamming into her as I hear her gasps and moans with each thrust. Then it happens. Her nails dig deep into my chest, and she lets out a gasp as her cunt clamps down around my cock.
Continuing to thrust inside of her, watching as her orgasm takes over her entire body, it doesn’t take me long before I’m finding my release as well.
I fill her full of my cum, hoping that she’s not on any birth control, hoping that this moment made a baby. I’m going to be an old as fuck father, but I don’t care.
I’ll be the grandpa-looking fuck walking my kid to kindergarten if it means Avah is happy, if it means we get to live a life worth living together.
Burying my cock inside of her, I don’t want to pull out, I don’t want to leave her welcoming warmth. Nibbling on her bottom lip, I lift my head and look into her eyes.
“What happened wasn’t normal. It was a one-time thing. It means war, but none of our people will ever get hurt from it again. I’m going to take care of this shit. You don’t have to worry about a fucking thing, babe.”
She nods her head, but doesn’t say anything right away. “Baby, I’m serious. You don’t have to worry about a goddamn thing. Not ever again. You are safe and I will keep you that way as long as I live. I ain’t leavin’, you ain’t leavin’. We started this life and we’re going to live happily for a long fucking time, yeah?”
Her eyes widen as her lips part. “Yeah,” she whispers. I watch as she licks her lips, then she grins. “I want to build a house here and I want a safe room.”
I blink, unsure that she’s said what she’s just said. Then, my lips curve up into a small smile knowing that she and Trista must have hatched this little plan together and I can’t be mad at that shit, not ever, not when it means my girls will be close together and I’ll be right here with them day or night.
“You want that, you got it, honey.”
Her smile widens, her teeth showing as if she’s just gained some sort of monumental victory. Squeezing her ass with my fingers, I bring her back down to reality.
“We gotta talk about that fear that showed up in your eyes, baby.”
“Hawk,” she warns.
“I’m inside you, call me Orson, yeah?”
She presses her lips together and tries to wriggle out from my grasp, but I keep my hold on her firm. Shaking my head, I watch her, waiting to see what she’s going to say, how she’s going to explain what I saw, because there is no denying that I saw it with my own eyes.
“Orson,” she says, her tone still a warning.
Arching a brow, I continue to hold her, waiting. I’ll wait this shit out until I can get hard again, then I’ll fuck her until she tells me what she’s so goddamn scared about. She must see the determination in my gaze.
She lets out a sigh, then drops her head to my shoulder as she inhales a deep breath before releasing it and lifting her head, her eyes finding mine. The fear is gone, but there is something else there that I can’t quite read.
“I’m scared, Orson. I’m terrified. This world of yours, it scares me.”
Shaking my head once, my gaze doesn’t shift or move from hers, it stays connected to her own as I watch her, as I take her in, as I understand her fears.
“The world is ugly, honey. It won’t get better, it won’t get safer. Being with me is a risk. Being with anyone is a risk. You trust me, but you also have to trust me to keep you safe.”
“I didn’t feel safe,” she breathes. “Your world terrifies me.”
Nodding, I press my lips together before releasing them, but before I can say anything she speaks again and surprises the shit out of me.
“My world scared me too. Except, when I was living in that world, it didn’t matter if I survived it or not. I wasn’t living. Now I am a
nd I’m terrified to lose you, to lose what we could have.”
“Fuck,” I hiss.
She pulls me in a little closer, holding me against her body. Dipping my chin, my lips brush hers and I let out a grunt.
“You’re safe, Avah. You’re mine and you’re safe, swear that shit on my life.”
Chapter Forty
AVAH
Pressing my lips together, I tug the sheet up my chest as I watch Orson walk around the room completely naked and totally unbothered by that nakedness. He stops at the bathroom doorway, then looks back over his shoulder at me.
“You want a big wedding?” he asks.
My eyes widen as I watch him. Licking my lips, I tilt my head to the side. “Not particularly,” I murmur. “Why?”
His gaze travels down to my chest, then slowly lifts back up to meet mine. “Makin’ you my wife today. Startin’ on those babies tonight.”
Without another word, he turns from me and walks into the bathroom, leaving my mouth dropped open and my eyes wide as I watch. Then, after I hear the shower water turn on, I practically fly out of bed and run toward the bathroom.
Hawk is just stepping into the shower as I run into the steamy room. He doesn’t stop, doesn’t look back at me, just continues on his way. I follow behind him, hissing as soon as the warm water hits my still healing brand.
“Orson,” I whisper.
He turns around, his lips turned up and his white teeth showing beneath his dark beard.
“You can’t just throw that at me with no discussion.”
He doesn’t even skip a beat, not a single second passes before he bursts out laughing. “Did you expect one?” he asks through his laughter.
Tilting my head back, I look into his smiling eyes and I realize that I do want to marry him, today. There is no other man I would ever want to marry and even though this isn’t the wedding that I would have ever envisioned for myself, it’s not like I ever really thought about a wedding anyway.
UnWreck Me (Savage Beast MC Book 7) Page 27
