by J. M. Dabney
Gage
Trenton Security Book 3
J.M. Dabney
Hostile Whispers Press, LLC
Copyright © 2019 by J.M. Dabney
Hostile Whispers Press, LLC
Cover by: Reese Dante (ReeseDante.com)
Edits by: AlternativEdits (Laura McNellis)
Proof Edit by: Stephanie Carrano
Cover content is for illustrative purposes only. Any person depicted on the cover is a model.
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
REMEMBER:
This book is a work of fiction. All characters, places, and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places, is purely coincidental.
PLEASE BE ADVISED:
This book contains material that is only suitable for mature readers. It may contain scenes of a sexual nature and/or violence.
For my Readers
I can’t thank everyone enough for their support in purchasing and reviewing my titles and most importantly for embracing my voices who are outside the norm.
Every Body is Worthy!
Special thanks to the people who’ve kicked my ass every time I think about giving up. Tracey, Stephanie, Meredith, Michelle, Laura and Jenn. I love my enablers and the unconditional support y’all show me.
Note to Readers
This title contains the following triggers: Self-Harm. Suicide. Domestic Abuse. Human Trafficking. Off-Page Implied Rape.
Thank you in advance for your reviews and in taking the time to read Gage and Derrick’s story.
J.M. Dabney
Contents
Prologue
1. The Little Boy Must be Crazy
2. Did Gage Want to be His Daddy?
3. Markers Called In
4. Where Was Gage Hiding?
5. They’re No Closer to Finding Her
6. They Needed Him for an Assignment
7. Gage Would Kill Them All Later
8. Derrick Should’ve Said No
9. What Had Gage Been Thinking?
10. What the Fuck had Derrick Been Thinking?
11. Gage was a Sick Fuck
12. Derrick Had a Lot to Think About
13. When Gage Fucked Up, He Went All Out
14. Derrick Hated Stakeout Duty
15. His Boy Looked Exhausted
16. Derrick Hadn’t Been Prepared
17. Gage Had a Story to Tell
18. Was Needing to Puke a Bad Date Omen?
19. Gage Needed to Make this Good…No He Need it to be Amazing
20. The Life Derrick Always Wanted
21. Are You Trying to Get Yourself Killed!
22. I’m Sorry, Boy
23. Gage Forgot He Had a Family
Epilogue
About the Author
Also by J.M. Dabney
Prologue
Houston, Texas 1988
Hayden Gage stood outside the recruiting office hours after he’d walked across the stage of his high school auditorium and accepted his diploma. Only a few months separated him from freedom. He knew what he wanted, and he was going to escape the last seventeen years of hell. Three of them he’d fought alone without the one person who’d loved him—his mother. He struggled to remember the sound of her voice and the way her arms felt around him when she hugged him. At times, he wondered if she was just something he’d created to make his life bearable.
The day his life descended into an abyss was never far from his mind. Functioning without his mother was more than he could take and it was a struggle to keep going.
“Hide, Hayden, don’t come out until I call you.” His mother’s voice was soft in his ear.
The Major’s face was red with rage, and the veins strained in his forehead and neck. A sure sign that the man’s control had broken. He’d run to his room and hid just as she’d told him to. The crash of shattering glass had forced him deeper into the tight corner between his bed and the wall. He’d just turned ten. Birthday or not, Major Dennis Gage hadn’t relaxed his command. The Major was a larger than life figure in his uniform. Brutally cruel with no kind words for his wife or son, they were things to command and control, nothing more.
“What did I tell you, woman,” Major yelled.
“It’s his birthday. He deserves—”
The violence of a slap cut off what she’d started to say.
He’d hugged his skinny legs to his chest and tried to make himself as small as possible.
“Get your ass down here, boy.”
The anger in his father’s voice warred with the order from his mother to stay hidden.
“Do you want your mother to take your punishment and hers?”
Her cries drew him from his hiding space and his feet dragged on the thick carpet. He heard another punch and a high-pitched grunt. His fingertips traced the banister as he made his way downstairs.
When he entered the kitchen, his mother was bloody and bruised where she knelt on the floor. His father’s hand fisted in her hair, and it seemed the only thing keeping his mother upright.
“It’s time you learned how to be a man, Hayden. How to run your home. Keep your wife in her place.”
He felt his bottom lip start to tremble and he kept his gaze on his mother’s. Even through her pain and the blood that stained her teeth and lips, she smiled at him. She’d told him every day he could remember of his ten years that he was who she lived for and that God giving her him was her greatest joy.
“It’s okay, baby, you’ll—”
He ran to her as he watched her take another hit. She collapsed to the floor and hunks of her pretty hair were torn away, hanging from his father’s fist.
“They need to know their place, son.”
He blocked out the memories. He leaned his back on a light pole as he kept his gaze on the building. His mother took every punch, slap, and kick until she was so broken that she didn’t know anything else. People would think it strange, but the physical abuse came nowhere near the damage his old man’s words had caused. He’d watched the black and purple bruises fade over weeks of time. The mental and emotional ones lingered so much longer. They were etched into the premature wrinkles and the silver that overtook her thick and shiny cocoa hued hair.
The Major’s abuse aged her far beyond her years. No one ever noticed the slight tremble to her slender, gentle hands—the ones she wrung when her anxiety grew.
The happiest times of his life were the ones where his old man was deployed, and his childhood was normal. He needed out. He’d inherited the man’s anger. It slithered beneath the surface ready to strike. He’d awakened from blackouts too often with blood-stained hands. His friends shouting behind him and attempting to pull him away from his victims.
The only way for survival or to stay out of prison was to leave it all behind. Nothing was holding him there any longer. His mother escaped three years earlier. He’d come home from school during one of the happy times, or so he’d thought.
He’d run into the house and to the kitchen where his mother always waited for him. She hadn’t greeted him with a hug and an I love you. He knew he was too old to accept her motherly affection, but it was the single kindness that his mother received in her life. No matter what a bastard he’d started to grow into, he’d always wanted to be the one happy thing she had.
He had dropped his bag beside the kitchen table and went in search of her. The upstairs bathroom door had stood open, and as he
walked inside, he wondered why she was bathing so early. At first, he’d thought she was asleep and when he’d drawn closer, his calling out to her ceased as she bathed in a pool of crimson. Her skin was paler. He’d touched her shoulder, and her flesh was icy under his shaking hand.
His voice had shook as he’d called her name. She hadn’t responded. Tears scalded his cheeks as he’d fallen to his knees to shake her harder. Screaming her name. Begging for her to wake up, but she hadn’t, and he stumbled back from the tub.
He didn’t know how long he’d tried to get her to wake up before he ran for the kitchen to dial 9-1-1. He’d returned upstairs, covered her body with a towel. No one needed to see her like that. He’d hugged her and buried his face against her throat. She still smelled like his mother. The sweet, comforting scent of her lotion. She’d be fine. The paramedics would make her all better. She’d wake up and smile, say she loved him—how proud she was he was her son.
That hadn’t happened. Hours later, he’d sat numbly in the hospital waiting room. She’d protected him until she’d broken. He didn’t care about the nurses and doctors saying they were sorry. Telling him she’d just gone to sleep.
The only peace his mother had ever found was in the moment of her death. His father had forbidden him to mourn. When his mother died, parts of him had as well. She was his comfort. The only person he’d ever loved. With her gone, his father turned his rage onto him. He’d taken it, but no more.
“Were you coming inside, young man?”
A man in a sharp uniform, a friendly face with deep lines and an easy smile. Black hair cut short and regulation.
“Yes, sir.”
“Then come on, we’ll talk while we have a cup of coffee.”
He nodded as he walked through the door—this was his future. Life on his terms. He wouldn’t be his old man, and he’d never break someone’s spirit to the point that their only option for safety was in their last breath.
The Little Boy Must be Crazy
Dishes rattled, and the low murmuring of conversations filled the interior as the lunch rush started to slow down at Heidi’s Diner. Typically, Gage ate alone before returning to the office, but today, he hadn’t turned out to be so lucky.
“How about I buy you dinner, Gage,” the confident young man across the table from him asked.
He stared at the boy as if he'd lost his mind. He slowly closed his laptop and calmly leaned back in the booth. The first time he’d seen Derrick Thorpe the kid was skin and bones, skittish from years of abuse by Derrick’s homophobic and racist father, the former Sheriff of Powers County, Georgia. The last time he’d allowed himself to be in the same space with Derrick, he had graduated from college. His boss, Linus, adopted Derrick and his toddler brother after the death of their father and, well, the mother hadn’t fought Linus when the man demanded she sign over custody.
Today Derrick was a man in his mid-twenties, and even with the pale blond stubble, he was still as pretty as the last time he’d seen him which had occurred Christmas a year ago. He’d made his excuses and went to stay with friends for the holiday. Fighting any of the Crews to get out of a family function always turned into a lost cause, and he’d found it easier to escape.
Gage forced a chuckle and a good-natured smile at the eager boy in front of him, but he felt neither of those actions. Because his greatest hell sat across from him and there was no way he’d ever allow the boy close to him.
“Not going to happen, kid.”
“Why not?” Derrick looked offended.
He wasn’t fucking around with some boy with Daddy issues. No matter how much he wanted to find out what his handprint looked like on the boy’s ass. Derrick wasn’t for him. Age difference aside, with Derrick’s history, he wouldn’t let the young man find out how interested he was.
“Go find someone your own age, Derrick.”
“What’s this got to do with age? I’m an adult, and I think I’m old enough to know what I want.”
He felt the muscles in his jaw clench. He didn’t like telling people no twice. When he made a decision, it was final. This little boy was asking for a spanking. A vision of Derrick over his knee came to mind, and he banished it as quickly as it appeared. This was getting out of hand. That’s why he’d avoided anything that had to do with seeing Derrick.
“And I said it wasn’t happening. I don’t like to repeat myself, Derrick.”
Derrick’s chin lowered to rest on his chest. There was a deep breath, and then Derrick looked up, his dark brown eyes shimmered with indignation.
“Yes, sir,” Derrick pushed the words through clenched teeth.
Gage reached down and grabbed his laptop bag, stowing his computer inside. He didn’t have time to deal with Derrick today. He had enough kids he had to deal with at work. Every time his team fucked up, he had to fix it.
He slid off the bench seat, removed his wallet from his back pocket and threw enough money on the table to cover his check, plus a tip. He rested the strap of the bag on his shoulder.
He strode toward the exit and outside. Trenton Security Headquarters was only a few blocks away, and he spent too much time trapped in his office, so any chance he got to take a walk he did. He’d hired on with Linus more years ago than he could remember, right when the company was just starting out. His military career had run its course, and he hadn’t wanted to settle into a life of command after his years with his SEAL team.
“Pop said you were coming to dinner tonight.”
He growled in his chest as Derrick walked beside him. He’d already told Linus he wasn’t coming to dinner; last count was twenty. His boss and friend was determined to have Gage attend every fucking function the Crews had. He knew his team wasn’t happy about him pulling back. They were a small tight crew. Except for a few freelancers they brought in, it was just the seven of them and that included their attorney, Peaches Phelps.
“Still living at home?”
“I move into my apartment at the end of the month. I can’t wait, the dads are completely hovering, and Dad is the worst one.”
“Hunter letting you out of his sight is shocking.” Hunter, one of Linus’s two husbands, was possessive of his adopted sons, even if Derrick was already seventeen when the boy moved in with them. That didn’t matter to Hunter, and the man had decided his son was going to have the best life.
“Dad isn’t happy. He tried to get me to agree to have a trailer moved out onto their property. I love them, but they love to try to make everything better. I’ve been living on my own for five years.”
A reminder of Derrick’s age, he’d be lying to himself if he said that was the only problem he had. No, he wanted Derrick, and what he wanted with the boy was something he wasn’t going to allow to happen. Just the thought of pushing Derrick to the edge only to bring him back got him hard. All the nights he’d dreamed of fucking his boy and claiming him were a temptation that he barely resisted. He couldn’t allow himself to weaken, no matter how much he wanted to do just that.
At least the kid was acting sensible and not harping on the date which made things a little easier—not much though.
“I’m sure they get it, but you know Hunter gets a little protective.”
“I know, and I really appreciate it, but I’m an adult. Hunter isn’t too happy with my career choice, neither is Lily, but for different reasons.”
Linus’ mother Lily was militantly anti-establishment and had scarcely survived with her reputation intact when her son dared marry a deputy. Now her grandson was betraying her, too. He could already see her losing her shit over that. Her meltdown over Deputy Wren was legend even years later.
“You do know Pelter looks the other way on certain things.”
Derrick laughed. “Yeah, they’d have to expand the department to have enough cells for all the Crews.”
“Ready to start as the newest Powers’ Deputy?”
“Yes. I’m trying to not dread working for Pelter.”
“He’s not so bad. Linus just dr
ives him crazy.”
“That, but—”
He knew what was coming. “Derrick, you’re not your father.”
“Thorpe isn’t my dad, he never was. My dads wanted me. They were there for everything from graduations or just when I called saying I needed them.”
He turned his head to find Derrick with his hands deep in his pockets and staring down at the toes of his tactical boots.
He didn’t question his actions, he raised his hand to push his fingers under Derrick’s chin and forced the boy’s gaze to his. “I’m sorry.” He dropped his arm back to his side before he had the chance to cup Derrick’s jaw and stroke his thumb over the lush curve of the man’s lower lip.
“It’s fine, I grew up with Thorpe, and every day was hell. I just don’t like being reminded.”
The misery of Derrick’s expression caused him to want to rid the man of all his problems and worries, but he wasn’t meant to have a boy—a partner—of his own.
He decided to change the subject to make Derrick more comfortable. “What’s tonight’s dinner honoring?”
“I don’t know, could be my new job or something else. I hear it’s going to be just the Trenton Crew. Well, maybe not Little and Poe, I think they’re fighting again.”
He chuckled. “When don’t those two fight?” Little and Poe had a weird relationship. Who the hell married the man who kidnapped them? Apparently, Poe did.
