by Kaye, Nikky
“Dev! Oh god, I’m going to come if you do tha—”
Damn straight.
I wasn’t gentle when I wedged my fingers between us and found her clit.
I wasn’t delicate when I sucked her hard nipple into my mouth and made her howl.
But I was absolutely absorbed by her when she whimpered.
Begged.
Quaked.
My world had narrowed to a singular goal—to shoot deep inside her while she fell apart beneath me.
“Yes! Come for me, Audrey. Come on my cock. Need to…”
Fingertips pinched and limbs tautened as her walls rippled around me.
Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.
The ring—my ring—bit into the skin between my fingers as I laced my hands with hers and collapsed.
Like I said before, primitive.
18
Audrey
I sat on the side of the tub and stared at my new ring like it was a crystal ball.
Of course, it couldn’t predict the future. It was a piece of cubic zirconia. The best I could glean from it was that it sparkled like fireworks in the bathroom mirror when I stood up and counted the marks that Dev had left.
All. Over. My. Body.
Every little love bite and bruise gave me a heady feeling, even the ones I couldn’t see properly. Especially the ones I couldn’t see. I’d never inspired passion like that before.
I wrapped my arms around my naked body and searched my reflection for the marks he’d tattooed on my soul. It wasn’t like I lost my virginity, but something felt… different.
It could have been that I was currently hiding from room service, just in case anyone was spying for Hessa. I thought it sounded paranoid, but Dev claimed he didn’t want my reputation ruined.
“Really?” I scoffed, waggling my artificially bejeweled hand at him. “This doesn’t count for anything?”
“Unless there’s a plain band and a marriage certificate to go with it, then nope.” There was something dark and possessivein his eyes when the ring shot sparks of light between us though.
It was the same gleam in his eyes as… before.
We’d fallen asleep soon after our epic first time. The chill from the air conditioning woke me up, my skin prickling with goosebumps. At no point did either of us suggest that I go back to my room. The furthest that Dev was willing to let me go was the bathroom.
My knees were a little shaky, and I winced when I went to the toilet. I felt like I’d been ridden hard and put away wet—which wasn’t too far from the truth.
When I returned to the bed, only Dev’s dark head stuck out from under the fluffy white covers. He was just awake enough to put his arm around my waist and haul me back against him. I snuggled into the cradle of his hard chest and powerful thighs, drifting off into a dreamless sleep.
When I woke up, he was hanging up the room phone. Shortly thereafter, he was ushering me into the bathroom for my protection.
“This is ridiculous,” I said.
He shrugged. “You’re only Mrs. Dev Sharpe on social media.”
At first that hashtag had given me a little thrill. Now it was a pain in the ass.
Every time I checked social media, there was a new litter of my fiancé’s stalkers trying to friend me—and those were the nice messages. There were a lot of sniping, bitchy, even downright ugly and abusive posts about me.
It was… unsettling, to say the least.
My stomach had sunk when I read them then, and it lurched the same way now as I lurked in the bathroom like the “other woman”—if he was married to his job. My emotions were all turned upside down, and not just because I was hungry. I looked longingly at the shower.
Could I risk the noise of the water alerting the waiter?
Jeez, now I was getting paranoid. How much hiding would I have to do, here? We couldn’t live in a bubble. We’d have to leave the room at some point.
But not just yet.
“You can come out now,” Dev called through the door.
When I peeked out, he was organizing dishes on the cart that room service had left behind. After he’d called downstairs, he’d pulled on a t-shirt and shorts.
Damn it, he was still wearing them both. He could at least ditch the shirt, I whined inside my own horny head.
He looked up at me and grinned lasciviously. “I love that you’re still naked.”
Someone has his own horny head.
“The robes are in the closet out here,” I reminded him.
Pout. “Damn, I thought it was a conscious choice to make me happy.”
“Does it?”
“Duh.”
“Then consider it an unconscious choice.” I spread my arms out and down like a display model.
“Those are the best kind,” he said as he stalked toward me and wrapped his arm around my waist.
After our lips parted, I hummed. “Yeah, I noticed that at about five o’clock this morning.”
In the half-light of dawn, Dev had buried his face in my hair and sleepily pulled me back on his morning wood. Although I was using one of his arms for a pillow, he reached down with his other arm and bent my knee up.
His words in my ear were half-formed and hopeful.
He talked about the way I tasted and smelled in terms that would have been almost cannibalistic if they weren’t also fucking hot. A quiver ran up my spine just at the memory of the way he parted my thighs and rolled me onto my stomach.
It had been fast and hard, tinged with a primal urgency as though we were the only two people left on the planet and had to—oh.
I hurried to the closet, suddenly feeling the need to put that robe on. My voice was sharper than I meant it to be as I tied the belt.
“Dev!”
He’d moved back to the desk and was unwrapping silverware. “What?”
I hesitated. Knotted the cotton belt tighter. Well, this is awkward.
“Protection,” I blurted out.
He frowned at the fork and knife in his hand. “What are you tal—oh, fuck.” He went pale under his naturally tanned skin.
“Yeah.”
He looked at me, then back at the knife as though he was considering plunging it into his chest. “We didn’t have the talk,” he said, almost to himself.
I felt like shit. “I forgot to bring it up, too.”
“Audrey…”
His hold on the knife shifted enough to make me even more nervous. “Um, I’d feel a lot better if you lowered your weapon before we have this conversation.”
The cutlery clattered to the desk. He stared at the bed.
“Dev! Hey!” Was I going to have to snap my fingers to get his attention?
His mouth moved silently, and I realized he was counting how many times we…
“It’s safe! I’m safe!” I waved my arms back and forth like a baseball umpire.
Finally he registered my voice and met my anxious gaze. “Oh, thank god.” His relief was comically super-sized… and it hurt my heart.
I pivoted away from him, fiddling with the belt on the robe. No tears. No tears! Damn it.
“Shit.” He moved over to me and touched my back. “I’m sorry I freaked. I just don’t want a…”
What? A disease? A baby? I jerked my shoulders away from him.
He sighed. “I’m just mad at myself for not thinking about it. I’m supposed to be smarter than that.”
I whirled around. “And I’m not?”
“That’s not what I meant!” He clutched at his hair as I crossed my arms over my chest.
“You know,” I said, “now would be a good time to say, ‘Audrey, you have nothing to worry about.’”
The jackass had gotten so caught up in his relief he hadn’t offered me any.
“Audrey, you have nothing to worry about.” He bit his lip. “Except, is the timing…?”
“Relax. You can’t get me pregnant.”
“You mean you’re on something.”
Oh, for fuck’s sakes. He was going to m
ake me say it out loud. “No, I mean that I’m defective, you clueless asshole.”
Now my eyes filled. Spilled over.
Silently, he led me over to the bed and sat me down on it. “This sounds like something we need to talk about.”
I swiped at my face with the long sleeve. “There’s not much to say,” I said dully. “When I was, um, engaged before, I had a miscarriage.” I looked up at him, wanting to reassure him. “I wasn’t trying to get pregnant, itjust…”
“Happened.” He nodded.
“Anyhow, it was… bad. The doctors said basically it would be pretty much impossible for me to get pregnant again.” It bothered me that I didn’t want to meet his eyes. I shouldn’t be ashamed of it, but for some reason…
“So what happened then with the asshole fiancé?”
I snorted.
A sigh slash laugh fell out of his mouth. “I mean, the other asshole fiancé.”
“That’s when he broke it off.”
“Because you got pregnant?”
“Because I couldn’t get pregnant again.”
“Oh.”
“Anyway, you don’t need to worry.”
Dev’s arm snaked around my waist, but tentatively. “Maybe in some ways. But now I’m worried about you in others.”
Awww. “Well, now this asshole fiancé is redeeming himself,” I joked.
When I leaned against his shoulder, we both let out a shuddering sigh. Even though I wanted to believe I had enough of my own, it was a comfort to borrow some of his strength.
“Nobody knows,” I told him. Not that I had many people to share that kind of news with.
“Brett?”
I shook my head. “Not Shannon, either.”
Suddenly I realized how much I’d isolated myself. Call it denial, shame, mourning, whatever. If I felt alone, it was because I hadn’t shared my pain with anyone. Maybe that was a mistake.
Being left in a sobbing mess in a hospital bed wasn’t nearly as bad as walking around like a zombie for the past six months, with my failures eating up my plans for the future.
But this wasn’t the future I’d imagined.
I was in a hotel room on the other side of the world with my brother’s best friend, a fake ring on my hand and real love bites all over my body.
Lying to nice people.
Lying to myself?
“What am I doing here?” I muttered under my breath.
Dev’s body stiffened against my side. “What do you mean?”
“What happens after this?”
All the time I was coping, trying to put one foot in front of the other one, I’d forgotten my destination. When Dev had told me about the million airline miles, it seemed like the perfect opportunity to escape. It was a way to forestall my pain, to put off making new plans.
I’d forgotten about the baggage I’d be bringing along. At the time it was funny when Dev had relieved me of my baggage at LAX, but he hadn’t known how much was still weighing on me.
“After this… you mean after our trip?” Dev asked.
“I guess.” After… us?
“What do you want to do?” He turned his body to face me, his hand tilting my chin up. “Seriously, Audrey. What do you want to do with your life?”
I blinked at him. It wasn’t a question I’d had the luxury of asking myself. When our parents died, I’d had to finish school. I’d helped Brett as he’d helped me. I’d worked. I’d lived. Okay, maybe more like existed.
What did “want” have to do with anything in life?
“If you could do anything,” Dev asked, “what would it be?”
“Don’t—that’s not fair.” I tried to look away, but he held my jaw firmly.
“I mean it. What makes you happy?”
You.
“Pretend money isn’t an issue,” he added when I didn’t respond. “Do you want to go back to school? Start a business? Join the circus?” He paused. Swallowed. “Get married?”
My breath caught in my throat, and this time when I tugged at his hand he let me go.
When I stood, I felt his hand trailing over the back of my robe as I stepped toward the desk. The food he’d ordered was probably cold by now, but I wasn’t hungry anymore.
“I don’t know,” I said. I really didn’t.
“You take great pictures, you know.” His voice sounded brighter than before, like a cloud had passed and the sun came back out. “Maybe you could do that.”
“For a living?”
“Sure. I know lots of photographers. I could set you up with some people if you want to learn about it. Maybe you could get a job as an assistant.”
He sounded so optimistic, so certain—like he could just snap his fingers and provide a career for me. A future.
“With all those air miles you could just travel the world, taking pictures. You could be your own Instagram star. Start a blog. License your stuff for books or postcards or stock sites.”
“Hmmm.”
“I’m just saying,” he mumbled as he pushed off the bed and came up behind me, “you have options. I want to help you if I can.”
Oh! Now I was being a grumpy asshole fiancée. I turned around and hugged him. “You already are. I’m sorry if I sounded ungrateful. You’ve been amazing. This opportunity is amazing.”
There was that word again. He’d promised me we could be amazing together. At the time, we’d been talking about having a fling. Something had shifted though. Had the ring made things feel more serious?
“Audrey, You can do it. I’ve got your back.”
His arms tightened around me as I buried my face in his soft t-shirt. Breathed in his scent, a mixture of musk and sweat and cologne and hotel shampoo. Pheromones were powerful things, and now that I’d tasted his skin I was an addict.
“Thank you,” I mumbled into his chest. He was warm and solid and soothing.
“I’ll be by your side if you want me to be,” he promised. His chin dipped, and he kissed my hair.
Exactly. This.
Forget about the fact that he was my brother’s best friend. Forget about the fact that we were faking an engagement to mollify his uptight boss. Forget about the fact that this casual affair felt a lot less casual now.
‘Amazing’ had already begun for us, while we weren’t looking.
I’d been blindsided and now wondered—what could my future look like with Dev by my side? What would it be without him?
Not that long ago, he’d been the warm memory of an unrequited teenage crush. Now I couldn’t imagine my life without him. That scared the crap out of me. The last time I put my future in someone else’s hands, they crushed me.
But I trusted Dev, didn’t I? What was I so worried about?
I tilted my head back to look in his eyes. There was so much tenderness there. Apology. Hope. Desire.
“You’re a good friend.” I stretched up to kiss him.
When I pulled back, he smirked. “I’m a better lover.” Then he kissed me again.
Longer. Deeper. Hotter. More.
Moment by moment, touch by touch, he emptied me of anxiety and refilled my soul with a desperate need for him.
My hands skimmed down his back and slipped under the hem of his shirt. Pulled it off. I craved the feel of his skin.
When I shoved my hands down under the waistband of his shorts and squeezed his ass, his muscles clenched under my fingertips and he let out a groan.
“Fuck, Audrey. Why do I want you so much?”
Was that a rhetorical question?
He parted the top half of my robe, tracing secret designs over my skin. I trembled, my arousal rocketing.
“I want you, too.”
Right now. Later. Tomorrow. Forever.
He sighed, his large palms cupping my breasts before he bent his head to them. When he closed his lips over one of my nipples, it was not so much erotic as it was… nourishing.
My eyes drifted closed as I imagined what it would have been like to nurse another human being. It gave m
e a jolt to realize that Dev might be thinking about that, too. He suckled softly, his hands working to rid me of the hotel robe. When he palmed my lower belly, something inside me began knitting back together, like a broken bone on the mend.
And then everything revved up.
A moan broke out of my throat as his mouth made its way around my breasts and up my neck. His brand was on every inch of my skin, every nerve ending.
“Need you.” His words were hot on my skin, but they made me shiver.
“Yes,” I hissed.
His erection tented his shorts, nudging my belly. Impatiently I shoved them down his hips until we were both bare in front of each other. His arousal was profound, his long, hard cock
Hot. Soft. Silky. Hard.
Dev took my face in his hands and covered it with butterfly kisses. I couldn’t help but smile until he reared back and looked deep into my soul. Then he frowned.
“Wait. I don’t want to fuck you.”
Oh.
I might have literally sagged with disappointment had he not been holding me up. So much for our fling, I thought. The mixed messages were making my head spin. My eyes closed in a reflexive kind of self-protection then flew open as he spoke again.
“I want—I want to make love to you, Audrey,” he confessed. His voice was hoarse and deep, gripping me as surely and gently as his hands did. “Can I?”
Oh!
I smiled so wide I thought my face would crack. “Yes.”
Amazing.
19
Dev
I lost count of how many times we made love over the next week.
The time passed in a haze of working days and playful nights—sometimes the other way around. The rest of our trip, we were inseparable. If we could be together, we would.
Audrey had asked Preethi if she could join me on some of my appearances even if just lurking in the background. She needn’t have worried though. Mr. Sharma was more than delighted to pimp us both, especially now she was sporting engagement bling. Thankfully, he thought it was romantic—for now. I hadn’t forwarded her his email or the attachment of the chart he’d had done for our most auspicious wedding date.
“Ugh.” Audrey buried her face in my chest as about fifty people raised their phones and aimed them at us in a shopping mall. “I still feel kind of violated when they do that.”
